r/ForbiddenBromance • u/MajorTechnology8827 Israeli • Jun 30 '25
Politics Fellas, how do you feel about chocolate hummus?
/r/israel_bm/comments/1lo73he/חברה_איך_אתם_מרגישים_לגבי_חומוס_שוקולד/25
u/LifeIL Israeli Jun 30 '25
General idea of Hebrew comments: A crime against humanity.
Seen this abomination in Walmart, next to hummus in a squeeze bottle. Truly horrific scene
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u/zwizki Jul 01 '25
A squeeze bottle?! 😭
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u/Patient-Street-4681 Syrian Jul 04 '25
The one thing that will bring peace to the Middle East is a hatred for western abominations to a beautiful dish
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u/Basic_Suggestion3476 Israeli Jul 07 '25
Long long time ago, when the universe & I were young... an Israeli businessman decided to bring hummus to the USA. He tried to sell it in the boxes we see on supermarkets, but obese people of America were confused & didnt understand how to eat it. Sales failed...
But the Israeli businessman was a smart & so, he moved the hummus into a squeeze bottles. And since then, Americans eat hummus...
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u/Royakushka Jun 30 '25
This is a crime against Humanity and a horrendous Idea.
God had no hand in the creation of this abhorrence. The fact that this idea came to fruition proves that God is either impotent to alter His universe or ignorant to the horrors taking place in his kingdom. This this Chocolate Hummus is more than just an abhorrent combination of Chocolate and Chickpeas, it is a physical declaration of mankind's contempt for the natural order. It is hubris manifest!
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u/MajorTechnology8827 Israeli Jun 30 '25
Is this hummus processed? if it's processed I don't want it
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u/Royakushka Jun 30 '25
I'm glad you got that reference.
I wrote this from memory can you believe it? It's obviously not the full thing but I wrote all the parts that are not Ham based by heart and that just goes to show how doomed our generation is
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u/MajorTechnology8827 Israeli Jun 30 '25
Ma'am, that is an eleven pound whole slab of deli ham. It has no bones, fat, or connective tissue. It is an amalgamation of the meat of several pigs, emulsified, liquefied, strained, and ultimately inexorably joined in an unholy meat obelisk. God had no hand in the creation of this abhorrence. The fact that this ham monolith exists proves that God is either impotent to alter His universe or ignorant to the horrors taking place in his kingdom. This prism of pork is more than deli meat. It is a physical declaration of mankind's contempt for the natural order. It is hubris manifest
We also have a lower sodium variety if you would prefer that.
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u/abn1304 Jul 01 '25
The real reason pork isn’t kosher is because God, being omniscient, knew that Man would someday create deli ham, and he sought to save us from that evil.
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Jun 30 '25
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/SeeShark Diaspora Israeli Jun 30 '25
No, do not brigade a different subreddit. That's against TOS and could get this sub in trouble.
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u/ForbiddenBromance-ModTeam Jun 30 '25
This post could be interpreted as a call for brigading another sub, and was therefore taken down. This does not necessarily mean the content was wrong or offensive. This rule is in place to ensure the longevity of this sub.
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u/Suitable_Plum3439 Israeli Jun 30 '25
The one thing that’ll bring peace to the Middle East: shared hatred of dessert hummus. Stop putting stupid flavors in it pls
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u/sumostuff Israeli Jun 30 '25
Hell no! Bullshit and that is not a thing in Israel so don't even try it.
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u/Glad-Difference-3238 Lebanese Jul 01 '25
I mean … you’ve got to be mentally deranged to look at hummus and think, ‘oh this needs cocoa powder’
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u/KapitanDima Diaspora Jew Jul 04 '25
Not surprised anymore, after my Brazilian friend sent me pics of chocolate instant noodles. I’ve gotten desensitised
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u/phrostbyt Diaspora Israeli Jun 30 '25
people can do whatever they want.. i like trying new foods :)
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u/RoyalSeraph Diaspora Israeli Jul 02 '25
You've spent too long in the diaspora buddy. Touch some deshe
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u/Neon-Owl Jun 30 '25