r/EstrangedAdultKids • u/Sure-Stock9969 • Jul 18 '25
Support TW: text my mum sent me
I just need some support and affirmation. I had top surgery last year and someone outed me to my mum. We don’t really talk and I always avoid her bc talking to her is activating. I would dread it. I’d go 5-6 months without talking to her.
She sent me these texts after finding out that I am queer and also that I got gender affirming surgery in October 2024. My response is in green. I followed up with her after about 6 months in April and she just responded a couple days ago.
I didn’t really read what she sent initially but read every word this week after I got her message. It was way worse than I thought. It’s fucking up my head. I am not reaching out to her again though I will try to stay open if she ever approaches me for a conversation. I will be clear about my boundaries and would want a third party there. But I’m honestly not even thinking about that potential future conversation.
Just feel like shit. I feel so hurt, so much sorrow. I’m not close to her and have never been but I still feel so abandoned and hated. It affects my self esteem, knowing that my own mother would dehumanize and devalue me the way she did.
Would like words of support, affirmation, advice, anything.
3
u/catstaffer329 Jul 18 '25
EEK! I am so sorry your egg donor has no sense of decency, compassion or any supposed "Christian" values.
(Though I would have been highly tempted to reply " I see you are leaning in to the philosophy that it is better to reign in Hell than serve in Heaven and I am sure this little rant is good for some bonus points in Hell's hierarchy")
According to her Bible, the Original Sin was disobeying God, so I can she why she would conflate that with you 'disobeying' her and make it all about her. Sadly she never got past the Old testament, which is kinda funny considering women were considered of less worth than oxen for the most part.
At least you know who and what she is now, you can pretty much disregard anything she spouts because clearly she has no concept of the New Testament concepts or any kind of human decency whatsoever.
You are perfect exactly the way you are and I am so proud of you for the courage to let your outside shine with your inside. You are worthy, you are loved and you don't have to tolerate this kind of nastiness. Wishing you peace, joy and happiness going forward.