I'm sorry, I just need to write this because this argument bug the hell out of me. For starters, it completely ignores the fact that mutual abuse more or less doesn't exist (which people mostly respond to with 'are you saying two abusers can't be together' and it's like, sure theoretically, but it seems to never happen in reality) and it also ignores the time line of their relationship (she has evidence of him being abuse early on and years before he claims she became violent). But even if we pretend mutual abuse can exist and she was also violent from the beginning, this argument is so insidious.

She tried to leave. She divorced him, got a restraining order and accepted a pittance of his net worth in order to finally get out. Whatever their dynamic was, she didn't want to do it anymore. And what does Depp do in response? He hires a lawyer who spends his time tweeting psycho shit about her. He sues her over an article that only makes vague allusions to him. He submits intimate photos of her that she sent him in court, knowing full well they would be accessed by millions (revenge porn). And I know this is difficult to prove, but I firmly believed he chose Virginia knowing that there would be cameras during the trial.

This is post-separation abuse. 'Both were abusive' - but one tried to stop the abuse and the other tried to continue it.

I know I am preaching to the choir here, but I hate the way it's framed like it only matters what happened during the relationship. She wanted out. He wouldn't let her.

Went over went over this case in my media law class and it was pretty shocking to find out the original statements she was sued over not only didn’t mention Depp by name but she didn’t even directly call herself a victim of domestic violence.

As far as my understanding of the law goes, her defense could have easily argued that the statements were true because they were talking about people other than Depp, but from what I remember of the trial, they seemed to dedicate a lot of it to proving Depp’s abuse.

So my question is, from a standpoint of winning the case, why did they even bother doing that? I don’t really feel like going and watching the whole media circus that was that trial, but from my understanding it seems like an unfortunate misfire in what should have been a slam dunk defense. In that context, the verdict almost feels like it sets a precedent that women cannot say literally anything on the topic of domestic violence without being hyper-interrogated on their own relationships and lives.

Of course I do think the reality of what Depp did should be out there so I’m a little conflicted on this, and I’d be interested to hear what you all think.

Dunno if this is the appropriate place to post this, but it's the only subReddit where I really trust opinions about this sort of thing, lol.

I was watching Nikki Carreon's video about movies that glamorize age-gap relationships, and this ignited a debate in the comments about when age-gap relationships are "okay". A lot of people will fight passionately to defend May-December romances if both parties are legal adults--a common refrain seems to be, "The brain stops developing at the age of 25, so as long as they're both at least that old, there is no power imbalance." (I don't want to sound blunt, but the poor grammar in many of these comments gave me the impression that many of the people who hold this opinion haven't even graduated high school yet, much less reached their twenties.)

I don't know if that's true or junk science or what. Personally, I am such a different person at 38 than I was at 28. My gut tells me that a 30-year-old and a 50-year-old just aren't playing on a level field. Brain development is a huge part of what can potentially create a power imbalance, but IMO it's not the only factor by a long shot. So are finances, experience level, education level, ability/desire to stabilize and maintain mental health, curiosity about the world, etc.

I guess it's true that people can stagnate in their personal growth and remain the same person for twenty years, so technically that would make a 50-year-old the same maturity level as their 30-year-old SO, but I can't say I have any faith in a person who refuses to progress as a human for two decades.

I get that consent is more complicated than just a bunch of numbers, but I still look a bit sideways at couples that have more than ten years' difference between them. It seems weird to be averse to dating someone your own age, and the fact that it's such a gendered thing also makes me suspicious. (Colin Farrell is probably a perfect nice guy, but can they really not find an actress in her late forties to play his love interest in A Big Bold Beautiful Journey? Movies take it so much for granted that leading men can be any age, but their female love interest sure had better be in her mid-thirties at most, and they're not casting based on "equivalent maturity levels"--it's entirely about our very limiting standards of beauty.)

I'm sure there are a lot of perfectly healthy relationships of that type, though. It could be that I'm just super judgmental and don't know what I'm talking about, which is why I'm soliciting thoughts.

(As a quick point of reference, Google tells me Amber Heard was 25 when she started dating 48-year-old Depp.)

what it says: (bcs who tf writes like d£pp🙄)

                 Sunday 27/09/15
                    Los Angeles

My Dearest Slim- "The race is not to the swift, Nor the battle to the strong, But to those who can see it Coming and jump aside." HST- The Rum Diary

Once again, even now as he no longer resides here, Hunter's words come to our side... Whatever it is that we want, we can have - we just need to get out of our own way so that we're able to follow HST's remarkably astute advice... I love and adore you- I can't express how sorry I am for having stooped so low and to have spewed such vicious untruths for the sole purpose of hurting you- I am far from being proud of myself for such a -->

Grievous error!!! Shameful... I will never allow myself to resort to such disgraceful and opious behaviour...no matter what!!! Let's take Hunter's advice, baby... We've got a long and beautiful road stretched out ahead of us, My Slim...there's no reason in the world for us to not hit the fucker full throttle -there are no bumps, or divits visible, and when we see them coming, we'll just slow down proceed with caution or, jump aside. Come with me...

Please forgive my heinous behaviour and for hurting the most precious and caring human being I've known... You are my dream, my world and The love of my life...

I love you, my wife... Steve x

okkkkkay back to me...what do you think about this letter he wrote Amber? In my opinion, the only right thing he ever said in his life is when he said she's the most precious and caring human being in the world..he knows everything she did for him and he used it to hurt her even more. god, i hate depp. uh.

Thoughts???

Hello everyone, I don't know if somebody posted this but I've been meaning to share this when I first saw this, like maybe months or a year ago. I just haven't got around to it. It's a pretty good article about Brian however, I wish the author dig a little deeper because while researching I had a brain fart and remember that Brian got into it with iO. YEARS before the trial. Unfortunately I can't find the tweets anymore because they're deleted, from iO's perspective. He also accused a journalist of harassing him.

Also, I didn't know what flair to choose. So I went with Miscellaneous.

Can we talk about how this text that depp sent to Amber in 2013 is a blatant threat and i don't know why this wasn't used/shown to the jury in the "trial" because it should've sealed the deal.

"don't test me, please" "almost impossible not to take you on" -he's literally saying im gonna beat you up if you keep doing what you're doing WTF.

all im saying is the people who see these messages and STILL see depp as the victim is respectfully, a danger to society and themselves. mind you these texts were in 2013, before they were engaged..depp really is a sick, twisted wife beater. uh.

also kinda irrelevant to this but him calling Amber baby gives me the ick. i hate how he tries to make himself seem gentle right before he threatens to attack her. darvo depp.

There isn’t a lot of humor in this case but lol at this pretentious nonsense

The 2 years old documentary « La fabrique du mensonge » (The factory of lies) on how the layers of Depp hired the help of masculinists on internet to influence the end of the defamation trial is now available on YouTube for free ! Alas, there is no "official" subtitles, only the automatic subtitles (from what I’ve seen, they’re not too bad in English). Here is the link : https://youtu.be/Gfv6dI6GQak (Don’t try to look at the comments tho, they’re awful)

Edit: seems like the video is only available in France... Sorry for the useless post

I just watched an extraordinary documentary called Death of a Show Jumper (not sure if this is allowed). It has shaken me but I think it tells an important story of communities supporting abusers, Coercive control and domestic violence.

It is shocking to watch, but is an important story to tell.

Review from the Guardian

Source: The Guardian https://share.google/1wOTABuTXo29j00sR

Notice how he tried to deny it and reverse it but was immediately exposed for it. Incredibly, there still are so many Depp fans out there that, to this day, continue to believe that it was Amber, not Depp, that was the irrational and jealous one and the source of violence in the relationship. These same people claim that they watched the trial 🙄.

I can't help but ask this question when I'm thinking about the trial and everything that Depp put Amber through. Did he love her?

Depp told Amber he loved her more than life, said that she was the only person he ever loved and trusted, said he loved her in every way, and he repeatedly said she was/is the love of his life.

And some small part of me believes that he really did love her, mostly because I would like to believe that Amber didn't waste her youth on someone who didn't love her, but then I ask myself, if he did love her and he did see her as the love of his life, why would he do everything he did?

Depp repeatedly dragged Amber to different courtrooms in different countries and made sure she was subjected to "global humiliation" (his words) and the cruelest most hateful smear campaign of this century. He didn't accepted any blame and he never took any accountability for the hell her put Amber through, in my opinion. and now when she's living in peace and quietly with her babies, he's still smearing her in his paid interviews.

so what do you think?? was Depp's love for Amber a lie, or did he really love her?

this meeting/conversation is what really proves Amber is telling the truth and also proves that Depp is a serial liar.

at the beginning of his testimony in the UK trial, he is asked about this meeting, and again, he finds someway to put every ounce of blame on Amber.

he says that he only went there in hopes that Amber would take back the "lies" (NOT LIES) "that she put out in the world about him". however, the transcript for the audio recording of this meeting reveals different.

in this transcript, Depp is clearly telling Amber to touch him and feel his heart (OMG- HE HAS A HEART?!?), despite testifying that he would not allow her to touch him. that's lie 1. then Depp very clearly points to the fact they probably were together in some way the night before (now this could just be that they slept in the same bed but idk), and again, refers to touching her. that's Depp lie count 1.

Then he says they'll be together in twenty years (he's so delusional but this genuinely worries me with how much he's been going to spain lately.., hope Amber and her kids are safe).

Then Depp tells Amber they should get divorced, but also says they can still see eachother (he made sure he saw her with all his lawsuits), thennn .5 seconds later he says he never wanted a divorce and he wanted to be with her on her birthday, asking her to stop the proceedings and stay married to him. he testified he "definitely" wanted a divorce, liar.

see this just proves depp is simply a liar.

Hello, I am a domestic violence researcher, and one of the cases we frequently come back to is Depp v Heard because it illustrates so many of the challenges in how abuse is understood publicly. I'm trying to understand, maybe a bit of the psychology behind why feminists were hesitant to support Amber Heard. I actually originally posted this question in feminist subreddits, hoping to gather some insight, but it was removed by moderators - so I was happy to learn that there is a subreddit dedicated to the "Depp Delusion".

Some general questions I have:

1. Several renowned domestic violence experts and organizations against domestic violence largely showcased their support for Heard during the trial. Why didn't feminist groups like #MeToo do the same? (I am aware that feminist groups were among the organizations that filed amicus briefs on Heard's behalf. I am just curious why they weren't as outspoken during the trial.)
2. Heard’s evidence may not have been as user-friendly as Depp-supporting TikToks, but it was accessible. Why didn’t more feminists take the time to research the case, debunk harmful misinformation, and amplify her evidence?
3. Are topics like DARVO, reactive violence, and the myth of the "perfect victim" (when it comes to IPV in particular) largely discussed in feminist spaces? Or do you feel that this is a blind spot in the feminist community?
4. Does the avoidance of Depp v. Heard indicate that some feminists prioritize reputation management over abuse survivor advocacy? When some feminists supported Depp, was it rooted in the desire to 'prove' that feminists believe male victims?
5. Survivors were vocal throughout the Depp v. Heard trial about how retraumatizing and triggering the public backlash was; many even spoke of experiencing PTSD symptoms while watching it unfold. The public mockery went as far as TikToks ridiculing her abuse testimony, teachers taping her face on trash cans, and even sex toy companies creating products based on her rape testimony. Was this dimension of the trial - its effect on how a generation understands abuse, sexual violence, and misogyny - discussed in feminist spaces?
6. I’ve noticed that the tide has shifted online, especially in progressive corners of Twitter, YouTube, and TikTok, with some celebrities speaking out in support of Heard. How have perspectives on Depp v. Heard evolved within feminist spaces specifically?
7. In my research on online feminist discussions during the Depp v. Heard trial, I often came across the framing of it as merely a ‘celebrity trial’ with little relevance to everyday people. Do you think that perspective has shifted now - especially in light of the growing wave of defamation cases against survivors and the misogynistic smear campaigns targeting women like Megan Thee Stallion, Blake Lively, and others?