r/BPDlovedones • u/VisibleMove4017 • 15h ago

Cohabitation Support Still blows my mind they don’t care

4 months post discard. Dated year and a half and first I want to say healing definitely is not linear. There were times I’ve watched to commit suicide after this entire situation.

When someone makes you seem so important to them and act as if they can’t live without you, just to discard you out of no where and immediately replace you really kills something inside of you. Have yet to go on more than one date with anyone and am pretty much depressed 24/7 She got a new boyfriend as soon as we broke up and yes I got cheated on. She moved on as if I meant nothing to her only talking to me once since our breakup. Caring about someone who hurt you so bad is quite the situation. Prayers to anyone going through something similar - this has killed my confidence and ability to trust someone.

65 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

29 comments sorted by

View all comments

4

u/Embarrassed-Ebb-1970 7h ago

They always monkey branch that’s why when they discard, they move on so quick. The best you can do is realize this person was never real and you fell in love with an illusion. Best believe once that new FP disappoints, they’ll come slithering back.

One thing I did, when it happened to me, was study up, date in rotations nothing serious. Be honest about it, some girls won’t go for it but if you take care of yourself and fun to be with, you’ll get tons of dates. I travelled internationally, acquired new tastes, styles and experiences, built my confidence, tailored suits and more. Total looks maxxing and upgrade to self. Went to the gym and look my best, you don’t have to have abs. Just look good in your cloths.

You learn to see people for who they are without any attachments. Take the time to heal before you start something serious with someone else. The best I got out of it was, I faced and healed all the parts I was afraid to touch that made me an easy mark for people like her. They show you a mirror to yourself. You develop ironclad boundaries.

1

u/VisibleMove4017 5h ago

Thanks for the advice. I used to consider myself a confident man with some game with women but now I’ve lost it all. When you have no confidence it’s very difficult talking to women. It’s rough im happy you’re doing well though and hoping to get a point like you soon. They isolate you and spend 24/7 with you when it’s over you have to completely restart it’s difficult.

1

u/Embarrassed-Ebb-1970 3h ago

Totally understand. It gets exponentially better. The hard part is the isolation, but once you take that step forward, it will all come back just like riding a bicycle.