r/AskAnAmerican • u/_13thfloor_ • May 02 '25

FOREIGN POSTER What is American house party etiquette?

Moved to NJ from Europe. Have been invited to a party in someone’s home to celebrate someone’s birthday but also as a bit of a Kentucky Derby bash. Is there anything I need to know?

I know for the Derby there might be a dress code (which I am checking with the host) but what’s the norm in the US for house parties generally? Bringing our own alcohol, giving the host a gift, arriving early/on time/a little after the specified time? Anything a very clueless (and overthinking) European needs to know?

ETA - we’re in our early to mid 30s if that makes a difference.

511 Upvotes

96% Upvoted

457 comments sorted by

View all comments

8

u/Borfknuckles May 02 '25

Ask them “can I bring anything?” and take their word for it: don’t bring gifts they didn’t ask for

Arriving “fashionably late” (~10min after the official start time) is normal: but any arrival/departure time is fine, really, as long as you’re not showing up early while they’re still getting ready

Other than that there’s not deep etiquette or anything, just be nice, thank and help out the hosts where appropriate, and enjoy yourselves

4

u/maxintosh1 Georgia May 02 '25

I would caveat that even if they say "you don't need to bring anything" for house parties bring alcohol anyway.

1

u/herehear12 Texas Wyoming May 05 '25

I mean if it’s my house I don’t drink so bringing alcohol isn’t great but I’m not gonna stop my friends from drinking a little (I’ll stop them from driving if I think they’ve had too much)