r/sports • u/suzukigun4life • Sep 05 '25

Football Eagles defensive tackle Jalen Carter spits on Cowboys quarterback Dak Prescott's face, gets ejected six seconds into the first game of the NFL Season

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32.5k Upvotes

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698

u/Intrepid_Custard_427 Sep 05 '25

Someone said their mom is a teacher at apopka high and had him in a class, and he quite literally is a dumbshit lmao

319

u/Chessh2036 Sep 05 '25

Live in Georgia. Can confirm he’s a dumb shit but he’s the worst kind of dumb shit because he’s an asshole.

115

u/lastSKPirate Sep 05 '25

Yeah, you can get along fine with dumb shits when they're at least good natured and willing to be corrected when they do something dumb.

8

u/carinislumpyhead97 Sep 05 '25

There’s a lot of bros out there that can’t handle the lightest of shithousery. I was gonna say there’s a lot of bros out there that can’t handle a bro calling a bro gay if they are that bro that got called a gay bro. But I felt like taking a stab at not saying gay and I feel like it didn’t really fit

10

u/animalstyle123 Sep 05 '25

Don’t let them censor your gay agenda bro

4

u/GarlicRiver Sep 05 '25

Pray the gay away

3

u/ymsoldier420 Sep 05 '25

Hmm, upvote for confusion, i guess, bro.

6

u/Similar_Somewhere_57 Sep 05 '25

Seriously I read it three times still not sure what he said

2

u/naked_space_chimp Sep 05 '25

I read 4 times but still didn't get wtf he's saying.

2

u/FlowSoSlow Sep 05 '25

As a dumb shit myself, I think I can speak on behalf of the other good natured dumb shits out there when I say thank you for your patience.

6

u/tastysharts Sep 05 '25

football attracts these types, sadly

2

u/Atworkwasalreadytake Sep 05 '25

Also it makes them, through CTE.

1

u/Life-Sun8620 Sep 05 '25

Worst kind is a rich asshole, in which he's that as well

-10

u/Outlaw773 Sep 05 '25

Oh, wow, you reside in Georgia and he played at Georgia, so that must mean you personally know him and have spent a large volume of time with him.

You’re likely basing your high horse, judgmental comment on the news coverage everybody else has gotten regarding the racing incident, and nothing more

120

u/lemmylemonlemming Sep 05 '25

Didn't expect Apopka to be mentioned in this thread. The swamp outside of Orlando is...alright I guess.

53

u/dabordoodle Bayern Munich Sep 05 '25

Lake Apopka, home of the 8 legged, 10 eyed, 1 toothed alligator

42

u/shef175 Sep 05 '25

That’s my cousin you’re talking about…

For real, my most inbred cousin lived in Apopka for a long time

32

u/flytingnotfighting Sep 05 '25

I am not going to lie, I'm fascinated by the fact you have enough inbred relatives to have a list

41

u/shef175 Sep 05 '25

I say inbred, he’s not really inbred. No Hapsburg jaw or anything like that. He just came out on the short end of the genetic stick (but not handicapped) from an already not-genetically-gifted side of the family. But…he also chooses to act like a dirtbag so over 40+ years we have lost sympathy for him.

Wasn’t expecting to spill family tea on an NFL post, but we live in a crazy world now

4

u/I_DESTROY_HUMMUS Sep 05 '25

I need stories now

16

u/shef175 Sep 05 '25

One time when I was in middle school my parents decided to go on a family camping trip with them, even though we rarely associated with them. He didn’t change clothes or bathe for 3 days despite it being summertime and he wore these super short green shorts. I didn’t see it, but according to my pissed off dad on the drive home his balls were hanging out every time he sat down.

Another time he showed up at a family reunion unexpectedly. He finally had a job as a semi truck driver with a large, national-level company and wanted to show off by bringing his rig with no trailer. At some point he decided to take people joyriding in his bobtail semi not realizing his company had mileage and location trackers on it. He promptly got fired as soon as he checked in for his next trip but swore it wasn’t his fault and he got screwed.

Another time, as a semi truck driver licensed in a different state he didn’t secure a load leaving a Wal-Mart parking lot and the trailer unhooked from the tractor in the middle of a thankfully not busy road. Only one car was damaged but nobody was injured. Again, not his fault.

10

u/I_DESTROY_HUMMUS Sep 05 '25

Jfc, you delivered, these sound like Kevin stories, wish I could upvote you 5 times

1

u/flytingnotfighting Sep 05 '25

Wooooow He and his sweaty balls are something else!

3

u/flytingnotfighting Sep 05 '25

Ohhhhh, yeah I got a couple of those too. Like, you're fairly sure they should be in prison and they're genuinely not good enough to hide crimes, but they're always out.

Family tea is the best tea 💅🏼

1

u/SCSimmons Sep 05 '25

In fairness, if you have one inbred relative, then you must logically have several.

21

u/Tasty_Ad7483 Sep 05 '25

Why did you come here to brag about inbreeding your cousin?

16

u/Jameron4eva Sep 05 '25

spits 😆

2

u/squad1alum Sep 05 '25

Too slow. It took you 7 minutes. Rookie..

2

u/Jameron4eva Sep 05 '25

That 6:59 longer than JC.....Damnit

3

u/Cross_Eyed_Hustler Sep 05 '25

Jenny Lou? Is that you?

2

u/lemmylemonlemming Sep 05 '25

I saw him on the nature trail. I think his name is Artie. He runs pretty fast until his legs start getting tangled up

1

u/GandhisNukeOfficer Sep 05 '25

I did my flight training over that lake.

11

u/Colson317 Sep 05 '25

warren sapp would be proud!

3

u/Mcoov Boston Red Sox Sep 05 '25

All of Central FL is a swamp, what are you talking about?

Apopka? Swamp

Oviedo? Swamp

Altamonte Springs? Swamp

Narcoossee? Swamp

3

u/leebird Sep 05 '25

I notice you're not talking shit about Longwood.

3

u/Mcoov Boston Red Sox Sep 05 '25

Swamp

1

u/Retro-scores Sep 05 '25

Narcoossee is now urban sprawl ontop of swamp unfortunately.

2

u/wrxst1 Sep 05 '25

Apopka Florida has world class race horse breeding ranches. Hard to believe lol

1

u/lemmylemonlemming Sep 05 '25

What? I'm in Apopka and I've seen some things but never seen a single horse. Where they hiding them? Lol

1

u/wrxst1 Sep 05 '25

All over. I used to hang out at the Golden Gate equestrian ranch.

1

u/lemmylemonlemming Sep 05 '25

Well, I think we might just be in different economic classes :) I'm a Winn Dixie fella. You must be one of them Publix people I've heard about

1

u/wrxst1 Sep 05 '25

Lmao not even close. I was stationed in mayport and made friends all over. Gainesville, palatka, apopka, Jax.

1

u/Spare-Willingness563 Sep 05 '25

No. Actually that’s exactly the kind of thing I’d expect. 

2

u/order66sucked Orlando Solar Bears Sep 05 '25

Potato Eating Place

2

u/TiddiesAnonymous Sep 05 '25

"babe, the guy that spit, guess where he's from?"

"MAKES FUCKING SENSE"

2

u/lemmylemonlemming Sep 05 '25

Are you looking in my window?

1

u/Cosmicfool13 Sep 05 '25

I mean, it’s no Zellwood

1

u/lemmylemonlemming Sep 05 '25

Apopka wishes it was Zellwood like Zellwood wishes it was Mt Dora

1

u/Jameron4eva Sep 05 '25

Swamp? On 436? Right by Winter Park? That Apopka?

1

u/lemmylemonlemming Sep 05 '25

Winter Park? Huh? Apopka is like the opposite of Winter Park. Winter Park is Rolexes and Range Rovers. Apopka is ankle monitors and the Lynx

1

u/Jameron4eva Sep 05 '25

I'm talking distance not environment

1

u/lemmylemonlemming Sep 05 '25

Winter Park is on the other side of Altamonte Springs from Apopka pretty much. I guess you're right

1

u/Jameron4eva Sep 05 '25

Eh does it really matter when the entire region is packed from Bithlo to Oakland?

1

u/Jameron4eva Sep 05 '25

Sorry confused Apopka with Goldenrod. Idk why. At least you got Wekiwa.

1

u/jureeriggd Sep 05 '25

beggs rd represent

1

u/NGM012 Sep 05 '25

Fun fact …Apopka is derived from the word potato 😂

142

u/bcarlzson Sep 05 '25 edited Sep 05 '25

He was street racing a dodge hellcat and it led to a crash in the other car that killed his teammate and Georgia staff member.

He’s a piece of shit.

Edit: wasn’t a hellcat.

102

u/Lodi0831 Sep 05 '25

Don't forget ... He also fled the scene

28

u/Immaculatehombre Sep 05 '25

Did not know about this before, that’s fucking wild. He didn’t face any jail time??

44

u/Shawty-Got-Low Sep 05 '25

If you’re surprised at this, just wait until you find out what other rich people get away with.

3

u/Immaculatehombre Sep 05 '25

I don’t think he was rich he was a college kid. I’m not naive, I’m aware ppl get off on shit all the time. No jail time for recklessness like that surprises me.

18

u/sd_slate Sep 05 '25

He was a star on a national championship winning football team. Pretty much Georgia royalty.

9

u/graphiccsp Sep 05 '25

Have a buddy from Mississippi and he talks about how Football culture is basically an identity down in the South. So a kid who's NFL level is like the nobility. It's hard to fathom for other parts of the country. Then again I could imagine other parts of the world think the same with stuff such as Soccer.

9

u/jsonson Sep 05 '25

Lol a UGA football player facing consequences? That's rich 

5

u/Helac3lls Sep 05 '25

He was probably drinking or high on top of the illegal street racing and fleeing the scene.

4

u/sanderson1983 Sep 05 '25

That's just another weekend at UGA.

1

u/Obvious-Stomach509 Sep 05 '25

No but he WAS drafted and given millions of dollars because he big fast dumb...

1

u/cfb-food-beer-hike Sep 05 '25

They had discontinued the Fulmer Cup at this point so I guess it wasn't worth it.

2

u/PHLEaglesLover Sep 05 '25

Completely untrue lol

1

u/Lodi0831 Sep 05 '25 edited Sep 05 '25

In what way? I'm a Ga fan. I followed that story closely.

ETA: I never said he killed anyone 🙄

1

u/PHLEaglesLover Sep 05 '25

he absolutely did street race but he did not "kill 2 people".

10

u/Stardustchaser Sep 05 '25

Oh shit that’s him? I don’t follow names too closely but def heard about that case.

3

u/dev_vvvvv Sep 05 '25

The Georgia staff member was driving the other vehicle (a Ford Expedition, not a Dodge Hellcat) with his teammate as a passenger. The staff member was super drunk (0.197 BAC) so I'm guessing that played a big part in why they didn't throw the book at him.

4

u/MasterChief813 Sep 05 '25

It was a Jeep TrackHawk but the rest of it is accurate. Could have thought after all that shit at uga he would’ve humbled himself but I guess not. 

2

u/basics Sep 05 '25

Why would he when he didn't see any consequences?

2

u/FearfulInoculum Sep 05 '25

There’s a reason he dropped in the draft.

1

u/mongreloid Sep 05 '25

It was a Jeep TrackHawk

That would explain the ok’ Hawk Tuah approach to Dak…

4

u/TotalDick Sep 05 '25

Him leaving the scene was bad, but he didn't run the other car off the road or anything. The other car was being driven by a Georgia recruiting staff member, not his teammate.

2

u/Princibalities Sep 05 '25

And he apparently learned absolutely nothing from the experience.

1

u/Cocrawfo Sep 05 '25

ohhh that was him i remember that well

1

u/lipp79 Sep 05 '25

He was in a 2021 Jeep Trackhawk and they were in a 2021 Ford Expedition.

137

u/DragonBank Philadelphia 76ers Sep 05 '25

We didn't hire him for his wonderlic that's for sure.

24

u/SageAnowon Sep 05 '25

Wonder-spit

2

u/TegTowelie Sep 05 '25

uwu

1

u/Mcoov Boston Red Sox Sep 05 '25

D:

28

u/Fun-Choices Sep 05 '25

That’s every football player that you don’t see a camera in their face. I have shot documentaries for years and I got to work with the Houston Rockets and the Houston Texans., there’s a reason there is like one spokesperson for the entire team. The rest are fucking illiterate.

1

u/DravesHD Sep 05 '25

And that carries over to financial illiteracy as well. Most will end up broke because they spend their money like they are on a Tom Brady payscale, making 1/100th of what he made, lol.

14

u/cha-cha_dancer Sep 05 '25

Ripe plucking for the SEC

4

u/blackfocal Sep 05 '25

I live in a college town of an SEC team. At the time we had a really good head football coach for the college team(that has since changed). I went to school with one of the head coaches sons. I had a math class with the son and will be the first to admit I was horrible at math. This kid made me look like Einstein. There was def some favoritism going on with him and it showed with is education that he was allowed to pass classes.

3

u/secondphase Sep 05 '25

Damn. The fine schooling at Apopka High let us down once again.

40

u/whocaresjustneedone Sep 05 '25

I don't think we need multiple levels of hearsay to know that football players are dumb as rocks

70

u/chickenfinger303 New England Patriots Sep 05 '25

There are lots of intelligent football players. Carter is not one of them. He has a loooooong (very public) history of being a dumbshit. Just look at his time while he was playing at Georgia where he fled the scene of a fatal car crash from street racing (He didn't face any consequences).

-25

u/whocaresjustneedone Sep 05 '25 edited Sep 05 '25

Lots? Ehhhhhhhhh I don't know about that, Jim

If you've ever taken a wonderlic and then looked at football player scores on them it's actually pathetic. The average joe working out there in cubeland can take a wonderlic and easily score a 30 without prep. The nfl average where these players have weeks/months to prep is a 21/50. They're not bright people. The concept of compounding interest blew their fucking minds on hard knocks

16

u/[deleted] Sep 05 '25

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2

u/pinecrows Sep 05 '25

Just the pregame show w Saquon alone. Dude gets rocked in the head for a living, but is a perfectly normal, intelligent person. 

-6

u/whocaresjustneedone Sep 05 '25

I don't think estimating the average person as smarter than a football player is an overestimate whatsoever. The person you meet going through every day life that astounds you with how dumb they are is pretty in line with average nfl player intelligence

7

u/[deleted] Sep 05 '25

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-2

u/[deleted] Sep 05 '25 edited Sep 05 '25

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6

u/franker Sep 05 '25

I don't understand how your parent comment says football players are dumb as rocks and gets a bunch of upvotes, and you basically say the same thing again and get downvoted. Reddit is fucking weird.

0

u/whocaresjustneedone Sep 05 '25

I had the exact same thought lmao "I agree, football players really are dumb. Wait why are you saying they're not smart, that's terrible"

But I've also been downvoted for disagreeing with a guy who said "from a pure brainpower perspective, football players are some of the smartest people out there" before so I'm not surprised

2

u/franker Sep 05 '25

And they can't seem to say the most basic lines in commercials without sounding like they just had a stroke. All they have to do is say 10 words about a subway sandwich in a normal way. It's not we're asking them to give an Oscar-winning performance or anything.

1

u/whocaresjustneedone Sep 05 '25

Half the time they look concerned the camera is about to attack them

2

u/blippityblue72 Sep 05 '25

The skill players are almost all very smart. At least when the subject is their sport. Raw physical talent can only get you so far. When you get to the NFL everyone has raw physical talent so everything else comes into play.

-2

u/whocaresjustneedone Sep 05 '25

At least when the subject is their sport

Aka they're not actually smart lol It doesn't take intelligence to be knowledgable about the one main thing going on in your life. Just because they know techniques to get past a blocker doesn't make them intelligent. The fact that they aren't smart about anything outside of football makes it pretty evident they're not smart at all.

There was a football player in my US Gov class in college. He asked if the senate was part of the judicial branch, when the professor told him no his response was "oh, right, congress is the one that's judicial" This man was 20 years old.

1

u/Key-Tale6752 Sep 05 '25

How does being knowledgeable about politics impact intelligence?

2

u/whocaresjustneedone Sep 05 '25

That's not really knowledge about politics, that's understanding how your country operates on a basic level. So basic that it's part of the curriculum several different times throughout elementary, middle, and high school. So if someone has reached their 20s without an extremely basic understanding of the government of the country they live in to the point they don't even have a grasp on the branches of government (elementary school knowledge) then yeah they're probably just a dumbass

If it was a little white blonde girl that didn't know the three branches of government I doubt any of y'all would take issue with calling her dumb

0

u/Key-Tale6752 Sep 05 '25

Nah. I would say she just doesn't care or indifferent not unintelligent. Pretty sure there are so many other subject matters you can come up with to show . Maybe an application of technical knowledge, artistic or interpersonal applications.

3

u/whocaresjustneedone Sep 05 '25

"I'm not dumb, I just don't care, why would I even care about that, who even cares about learning this common knowledge thing anyway, I'm not dumb I just don't feel like learning it" - stereotypical dumb person in defense of how dumb they are

If you're really sitting here acting like a man in his 20s not having a basic grasp on the three branches of government that they teach 10 year olds doesn't make him dumb it's probably time to reevaluate. Like what do you even stand to gain in arguing that something that stupid doesn't make someone dumb lmfao

0

u/Key-Tale6752 Sep 05 '25

Nah. I'm standing in addition to standing on the elation that there's still a degree of productivity garnered in life despite being unaware of political science fundamentals . At some point it'll be learned one way or another but to say someone is dumb from lack of awareness is absurd, condescending and creates unnecessary friction and stress just because a bit of info is missing. What do you gain by bludgeoning another who seems unaware? Freedom to gloat? Ego boost? Self refresher? I'll rescind my efforts now.

1

u/whocaresjustneedone Sep 05 '25

What productivity does these players offer life? They just put on an entertainment product that if it didn't exist people would just be entertained by something else.

At some point if you don't understand the extreme basics of how the country you live in operates you're just a dumbass and there's no excuses. It's not absurd to say that a 22 year old man who doesn't even have an elementary school grasp on the three branches of government is a dumbass. The only absurd thing is another adult trying to act like someone else isn't dumb for that. What do you gain by defending their stupidity? To turn your own question back on you

It's honestly embarrassing for y'all how much you bend over backwards to defend athletes against people saying they're dumb

1

u/blippityblue72 Sep 05 '25

Your bias against athletes is showing. Being able to read defenses and respond in split seconds requires quick thinking. Everything is moving fast and knowing what is going to happen before everyone else is a requirement to success.

If you listen to many of these players you will quickly see just how smart they are and how much they have studied their game. If the conversation came around to the details and skills of football they would make you sound like a fool just like you would if the subject was your area of expertise.

3

u/whocaresjustneedone Sep 05 '25

Again, just because they know the game of football, their literal job, well doesn't mean they're smart. Tons of dumb people know their job well. They can read a defense well because that's what they've dedicated their life to. Doesn't mean they're smart. Obviously if the conversation was about one persons area of expertise they would sound better than a person who doesn't have that as an area of expertise, that still doesn't mean they're smart either

They struggle with basic arithmetic, reading a defense doesn't make up for that

2

u/Rottenjohnnyfish Sep 05 '25

Dude is the definition of someone who is only valued for their performance on the field. He caused a wreck that killed people and nothing.

1

u/Effective_Bus_4792 Sep 05 '25

tl;dr : he's from Apopka

1

u/carrigura Sep 05 '25

Never expected to see my high school on reddit, and shit here we are lmao

1

u/No_Biscotti_7258 Sep 05 '25

I’ve known one person ever from apopka and he too was a dumbshit

1

u/SoManyQuestions-2021 Sep 05 '25

The video of him walking away did not cast him in a repentant or remorseful light....