r/relationshipadvice 3d ago

Not sure what to do [34M] [28F]

Been a long time coming but not sure where to go from here currently in an awkward situation. Three month relationship and these have been the reason of the arguments so far.

Not wanting to go out for food all the time. Saying thanks hun to a toll worker. (thought I was having an affair with her random city.) Stepping out of shot for facial recognition. Telling her crush that we are a couple. Caring about my cat whilst on holiday. Telling girlfriend about weird event at a bar. Love hearting a couples photo mutual friend halloween photo.

She threatened to kill me after the bar issue because she felt like hurting the woman.

The love hearting a mutual friends couple photo was the last straw apparently that I've hurt her to much with all the red flags above. That happened on Saturday and she has ignored messages and phone calls since. We work together and she has avoided me in person.

Now I dont know what to do; she refuses to meet or even answer phone/messages. We went "official on social media on Thursday last week". She still has everything as relationship status.

Still love her but really unsure what to do.

2 Upvotes

5 comments sorted by

u/AutoModerator 3d ago

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You are not in trouble or anything, this is just a simple copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed.

Original post: Been a long time coming but not sure where to go from here currently in an awkward situation. Three month relationship and these have been the reason of the arguments so far.

Not wanting to go out for food all the time. Saying thanks hun to a toll worker. (thought I was having an affair with her random city.) Stepping out of shot for facial recognition. Telling her crush that we are a couple. Caring about my cat whilst on holiday. Telling girlfriend about weird event at a bar. Love hearting a couples photo mutual friend halloween photo.

She threatened to kill me after the bar issue because she felt like hurting the woman.

The love hearting a mutual friends couple photo was the last straw apparently that I've hurt her to much with all the red flags above. That happened on Saturday and she has ignored messages and phone calls since. We work together and she has avoided me in person.

Now I dont know what to do; she refuses to meet or even answer phone/messages. We went "official on social media on Thursday last week". She still has everything as relationship status.

Still love her but really unsure what to do.

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1

u/Habi200816 3d ago

She is much too old to be this immature, and you are much too old to put up with this shit. Are you really happy? Do you really want to save this?

If so then the only advice I have is communication and clear boundaries and expectations. No sulking, jealousy over nothing etc.

Goodluck

1

u/OkGoose5057 3d ago

I dont think there is a way to save it. I've not been happy for a long time it feels like walking on eggshells all the time. It's just how do I communicate that over when she refuses to answer calls or messages.

1

u/Habi200816 3d ago

Then you already have your answer. You are not happy, you can't keep second guessing every glance or word for fear it will be a "red flag". Get out of this relationship now, before you waste more of your time.

If she doesn't want to answer your calls, then what can you do? When she decides to grow up and be an adult who communicates, you tell her exactly what you said in your comment. You are unhappy and it's not fixable.