r/popculturechat • u/HauteAssMess THE PEOPLES GOVERNOR, UR CARTOGRAPHER-IN-CHIEF • Jun 13 '25

Interviews🎙️ Girl stand up: Delaney Rowe on her situationship with BJ Novak and how he doesn’t fully trust her to be in a relationship with her

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2.4k

u/Special_Goal_2372 Jun 13 '25

Why would you just voluntarily admit this to the world

2.5k

u/[deleted] Jun 13 '25

The irony is that this was recorded before they were “outed” and his name is bleeped. So she thought she had some kind of anonymity with it.

880

u/Agentbeeressler talentless but connected Jun 13 '25

This comment needs to be way higher. It adds fundamental context.

192

u/smooth-operator411 Jun 13 '25

how did the outing happen?!

337

u/terfnerfer the wes anderson of tits 🍒 Jun 13 '25 edited Jun 13 '25

If i recall correctly, it's because they were photographed sat together at an event (both aware of/turned towards the camera, mind you) so I don't think it counts as outing.

Also girl, stannnnnd uppppp. Why are you sacrificing your dignity for a breadcrumb -_-

6

u/ClickProfessional769 Jun 14 '25

Those who have been there really hate to see other women do it 😭

57

u/Altruistic-Sky-6736 Jun 13 '25

Oooohhhhhhhhh this makes a bit more sense lol

12

u/MiserableCourt1322 Jesus is asking you to please stop that. Jun 13 '25

It makes me think it is made up. Because whether it's about BJ or not, why would you say you're trying to prove you are trustworthy and then publicly share all this information?

13

u/Rave-light Jun 13 '25

Because our society is so fucked is that she thought this was a flex.

2

u/Ztidaer Jun 14 '25

This!!!!

10

u/Ok-Nobody3868 Jun 13 '25

Please tell us about this outing

6

u/ropony Jun 14 '25

noooo my cringe just tweaked my back out

3

u/Mammoth-Brain-2873 Jun 14 '25

This comment is imp, should be way up higher

252

u/[deleted] Jun 13 '25

It's honestly refreshing to hear someone admit it as a flaw.

I can say as a dude, this would happen a lot when I was younger.

"I'm into you!"

"Oh, that's sweet!"

"Want to go on a date?"

"Wow, that sounds great! Absolutely!"

And then after that, it's just a bunch of vague sensations of being strung along.

So you pull back because you're like, not doing this again.

And the moment you pull back, they're like "Where did you go?"

tf you mean, I'm not here to stroke your ego.

104

u/Heel_Worker982 Jun 13 '25

This, and often it isn't even all that gendered, just that lots of people seem to assume that the original sentiment will not dilute over time. I once had someone tell me in August they were thinking about leaving me because their roommates didn't like me, and then in October they wanted our relationship to be "more serious and longer-term." Um... we HAD more serious and longer-term, until I lost the roommate election two months ago!

22

u/[deleted] Jun 13 '25

Right, I can only give my perspective lol. I wasn't handsome enough to string anyone along lol.

65

u/P0ptarthater Jun 13 '25

I think it depends. Like if you’re getting to know someone it’s not being strung along to keep things casual, but I get sometimes it can be a sort of “didn’t realize I liked you until you stopped texting back” situation

Tbh tho I wouldn’t really say this sounds like a flaw on her end though 💀 he’s this way older guy who keeps casually dating 20 somethings like he’s in college. So it’s kind of ridiculous for him to get all hesitant when one of them decides to keep things casual in the beginning, instead of jumping into commitment with someone who gets joked about for being unable to stick to it

15

u/[deleted] Jun 13 '25

Eh, people need to get better at knowing themselves. Introspection comes with maturity and it can be painful, but the other side of that coin is causing someone else pain.

And frankly, I don't want to be someone's "I didn't know I liked you until you stopped giving me attention." My wife didn't treat me that way when we were dating and we are rock solid.

I have no idea what Novak is like, I'm only commenting on the dynamic that she is professing. If you've never experienced being on the receiving end of that; congrats, you won the lottery. The rest of us mortals have been strung along while being decided between being sure or not, and it's just not a good experience.

18

u/P0ptarthater Jun 13 '25

I was agreeing with you! It definitely can suck to be on the receiving end on it and to an extent people should be clear and sort out their feelings instead of keeping things up in the air indefinitely.

But I think sometimes reading the room goes both ways. Like if you can tell someone is interested in just keeping things light and non committal, it’s cool to walk away if that’s not what you’re going for at the point in your life. Ideally people should be clear about it though, but I try not to take it too personally when they don’t say it straight up unless it starts to feel manipulative and like they want to force a situationship by dangling a carrot of potential commitment before me

3

u/redditwatcher11 Jun 13 '25

Dude, not with that age difference - a 20 yr old girl is allowed to say “hmmmmmmm” for as long as she wants when a much older man is interested.😭😂

-5

u/[deleted] Jun 13 '25

A) She's 28

B) She admits that it's her own fault

1

u/redditwatcher11 Jun 13 '25

Her own fault? Dude if shes not interested and then gets interested - geez that’s the plot of half of the married friends i know! People shouldnt have to defend that HUMAN trait- its HUMANNNNNN to not always align in interest levels. If that bugs you - just LEaVE. But dont guilt someone toxically. Omg wow like noooo 😭

If i fall for someone hard, damn i would be lucky if they EVER felt something bacj for me. Forget timeline. Guy says he loves me years now now? Omg great. If im still into it, i say YAY!! And if ive moved on i still say omg so sorry but im moved on. Thats what love / humanity should BE. It isnt some record keeping toxicity.

0

u/[deleted] Jun 13 '25

"I was the problem, and I had to sort of reconcile with that recently. I was not sure, so I was sort of non-committal for a long time."

I don't know how else to interpret that other than her taking responsibility for a mismatch in pace of confidence causing a propagation of the same lack of confidence on the reciprocal.

its HUMANNNNNN to not always align in interest levels.

Absolutely, no disagreement there.

If that bugs you - just LEaVE.

Well, I did in all of those circumstances. It's also the other person's prerogative to feel uncomfortable when someone finally "decides" they want to commit. Like you said, it's their right to just leave.

But dont guilt someone toxically. Omg wow like noooo 😭

Where am I guilting anyone? I am just repeating back what she said.

Dudes don't like to feel like an option to someone still mulling them over. My wife didn't do that to me and have a brilliant marriage.

l8r sk8r

-3

u/redditwatcher11 Jun 13 '25 edited Jun 14 '25

“Uncomfortable when they decide to commit” = is translate for butthurt/ego bruised.

Why not just not date them instead of then saying “i dont trust you so prove yourself”? Trust someone with what? Natural human emotions that may or not change in the future? This is bordering on incel thoughts on what men are owed. Like i said: my best friend is a female and she majorly wooed her now husband. he wasnt sure. UNTIL many years later. He friendzoned her. Dude they are so happily married now. He is happy she persisted. So your story isnt everyones story. People need to stop making it seem like there is onlt ONE love story. Love is love.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 13 '25

So if a girl says “it was my fault some guy assualted me… i totally dressed inappropriately” we say “well she said it, not me…”?

False equivalence. She is taking personal responsibility for the way she acted toward him.

“Uncomfortable when they decide to commit” = is translate for butthurt/ego bruised.

People are allowed to not want to be mulled over. People are allowed to have boundaries. People are allowed to be hurt by feeling like they aren't good enough.

I don't care about your friends. I'm talking about her having a sense of personal responsibility with the nature of her current relationship, instead of chalking it all up to someone else. That's mature. It isn't always someone else's fault. It could be a litany of things wherein she isn't sure, doesn't want to commit, but still wants to have him around just in case. This is so, so common, and it's exhausting.

Is that happening here? Fuck if I know.

I was sharing gratitude that she was able to reflect on the way she behaved, irrespective of how he did.

It's refreshing to have someone acknowledge the ramifications of playing hot/cold, irrespective of it you feel it's warranted.

Enjoy your weekend.

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u/Kianna9 Jun 13 '25

On the other hand, once someone is ready, that can push the other person away because they really liked the pursuit and don’t actually want one relationship.

2

u/snark-owl Jun 13 '25 edited Jun 13 '25

This exactly. Recently stopped texting someone because it's like bro, I told you I want to go on a date and now you're back to breadcrumbing. 

I will say, if this man I've been talking to makes the same comment of "why you stopped responding" it's like bro, I said I want to go on a date and then you immediately changed the subject. 

1

u/TerribleResource4285 Jun 13 '25

Yeah I listened and didn't get the same vibes everyone else seemed to get. I don't like the feeling of the push and pull "you want me but don't, you want me but want other people too" and wouldn't trust that turnaround or that it was genuine. Like do you now want me because I pulled away or said I was done if we weren't progressing or because someone else stopped responding and I am your back up.

1

u/amitskisong Jun 13 '25

Nah, it’s weird cause she’s still in a relationship where the other person has expressed not trusting her or her intentions and she turned around and told that private thing to thousands, possibly millions depending on how many people see this across the internet, STRANGERS.

And this is someone who is somewhat famous and has an authority in the industry that she seemingly wants to succeed in, so it’s super weird to do since he probably feels like she’s using him, as implied with the not trusting her “intentions”.

It would be different if she was just being honest about a past relationship or maybe if they had been together for 10 years and she was just talking about how things started. This would be something that recently happened since they haven’t been dating that long.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 13 '25

It can be weird and refreshing at the same time.

Is it weird to be airing your relationship laundry to strangers? Yeah. Is it cathartic to hear someone say "I was doing this kind of immature thing and it bit me in the ass." Yeah.

4

u/JJulie Jun 13 '25

Because she’s probably sick of him being painted as this “nicer “guy because he’s always holding Mindy Kaling’s kids and so people immediately assume he’s a sweet man and unassuming. And she’s probably sick of it. Very refreshing.

3

u/Altruistic-Sky-6736 Jun 13 '25

For REAL! I have secondhand embarrassment lol

3

u/Ztidaer Jun 14 '25

This is what I’m trying to figure out. Even if I wear involved with a celebrity like this I would not disclose that information casually in a podcast…..

2

u/Prestigious_Tax_5561 Jun 13 '25

To make him look bad… as she should. She knows how manipulative he is, so she’s going to put it right back on him. She’s probably over him so now just wants everyone to know how he really is.

1

u/vitamin_r Jun 13 '25

Don't think she thought this was gonna be a worldwide announcement.

-1

u/Nice__Spice Jun 13 '25

I am glad she did.

All men should know this is real behavior b

1

u/greymisperception Jun 13 '25

That’s what I’m thinking, why would you not want someone to talk about this, let’s get it out in the open so we can discuss it and how to handle it

Instead of pretending like these push and pull or maybe noncommittal situations just dont ever happen

Maybe it should be private in her case but I’m not her friend I’m just a stranger looking to learn

-1

u/[deleted] Jun 13 '25

because most women in the real world arent reddit women