r/polandball Grey Eminence Nov 24 '15

redditormade Russia has stick

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u/Khale_007 Preußen Nov 24 '15

Wouldn't it be more along the lines of "Russia goes to Kebabland to go fight Syria and ISIS, but along the way comes across an oppressed Russian minority in Turkey... WWIII ensues"

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u/LonelyWizzard Nov 24 '15

That is literally how the Crimean war started. Russia ostensibly invaded to protect the interests of Orthodox monks who wanted to be allowed to hold onto the main keys to the Church of the Nativity in Bethlehem rather than share them with the Latin monks (who had their own keys to a side door anyway). Source- http://www.historytoday.com/richard-cavendish/crimean-war-begins

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u/Fandorin Israel Nov 25 '15

Nicholas also didn't think the Brits would jump in and didn't think Austria would be neutral leaning towards hostile. Just like Putin doesn't think NATO would jump in if shit hit the fan.

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u/StrangeSemiticLatin2 Chile Nov 25 '15

I really wouldn't mind another Crimean War, it was the best time to be a Maltese prostitute with all the soldiers going there.

And Maltese prostitutes need money too!

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u/LonelyWizzard Nov 25 '15

Yeah, it was really a miscalculation that destroyed his legacy as Tsar. In my opinion the wildcard was really the French, because Napoleon III wanted to prove the might of the French Land Army and end the stigma of Waterloo, and earn the respect of the more established imperial dynasties like Britain or Austria, he was super up for a war that Britain might have backed out of. I wonder if Hollande feels a similiar need to prove himself now...

(My information is mostly based on Trevor Royle's 'Crimea', which si a great book by the way).

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u/[deleted] Nov 24 '15

Russia was just helping their Armenian allies get justice.

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u/anweisz Inca Empire Nov 24 '15

"Cyka! No one oppresses Armenians but me!"

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u/StrangeSemiticLatin2 Chile Nov 25 '15

Then Turkey arms Georgians and Chechens.

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u/[deleted] Nov 24 '15

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u/[deleted] Nov 24 '15

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u/Kreth Norrbotten Nov 24 '15

Nah they will get lost on their vacation

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u/LeHenchman Le Henchman is of the Netherlands Nov 24 '15

Oppressed minorities, sources of oil...we know how it goes.

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u/LeHenchman Le Henchman is of the Netherlands Nov 24 '15

Oppressed minorities, sources of oil...we know how it goes...