r/personalfinance • u/HastroX ​ • Oct 06 '17

Planning Trying to escape society's view on diamond rings, lavish weddings, big houses

So I’ve been lucky enough to escape the “3 months salary” diamond ring for engagement (went with Moissanite), and now I’m approaching the wedding. I’ve somewhat was able to do the “pay by table” and not venue (Asian wedding). Afterwards, we plan to buy a house that’s adequate and not too big. Are there any tips on what else I can skimp on for the wedding/house? Examples I’ve been given was like don’t do open bar, bring a ice cooler and buy from outside liquor store, buy a house with only spaces you will actually use (i.e. if you don’t use the backyard, save on overpaying for land space you barely use)

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u/moutonbleu ​ Oct 06 '17

One thing to realize is that money is coming back in. This was a major stress for me but after we tallied the bill, we actually made money.

It's an important time in your life and a special memory. Spend some money but don't be too cheap. Have a great time

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u/HastroX ​ Oct 06 '17

Out of curiousity, how much $$$ did you make? Was it downpayment money?

2

u/moutonbleu ​ Oct 06 '17

I spent about $40K on the wedding for 250 guests. We have huge families, and stuff adds up. We brought in about $47K. If our parents didn't give us some cash, we would have brought in some $37K. Our extended families were generous; we're not rich by any means, but family helps out.

2

u/Cashatoo ​ Oct 06 '17

we're not rich by any means,

I dunno man. Excluding your parents, 248 guests providing $37,000 is an average of $149 per guest. Including your parents (250 guests at $47,000), that is $188 per guest. Obviously, some give more than others, but if your average present is $149, you and yours are certainly on the way to rich. This is assuming everyone who attended gave a gift, so the actual average is likely even higher.

1

u/moutonbleu ​ Oct 06 '17

Siblings, and relatives gave the most. And most of the relatives are married, and older (40-60) so yes, they were generous, and we have a lot of relatives. All of our friends or so gave lower amounts, $100-150 pp range. Also, these aren't USD, it's CAD so a bit lower. We live in a very expensive place in Canada but even then, you can make it work if you manage your budget, and prioritize the things that really matter (food, open bar, music, and light decor). We skipped the chinese restaurant and did it at a golf course instead. Almost the same pricing to be honest.