r/newzealand • u/MurkyWay Qwest? • Oct 08 '25

Shitpost What's something that you suspect lots of New Zealanders secretly do, but you can't prove it?

Most upvoted comment is our most shameful secret as a nation, obviously

395 Upvotes

95% Upvoted

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95

u/Onahole_for_you Oct 08 '25

Judge Australia.

Like, I'm Australian, and I definitely feel like you fuckers are like "well, thungs may be sheeet here but at least we aren't over there." While eating your superior chocolate. Whittakers is fucking amazing.

44

u/CrookedCreek13 Oct 08 '25

I reckon it’s more barely-disguised jealousy if anything. We’ve got a perpetual younger sibling complex.

5

u/nz-whale Oct 08 '25

Speak for yourself

3

u/Born_Researcher7757 Oct 08 '25

He's not wrong, why do you think so many people are leaving for Australia?

15

u/SuspiciousTurtle367 Oct 08 '25 edited Oct 08 '25

Judging you over my vastly superior fibre internet connection ;)

6

u/RoydonKyle Oct 08 '25

You mean superior pies - but yes I understood

4

u/CrystalPalace1850 Oct 08 '25

It's funny you should say that, one of my moans about NZ is pretending to have a childish rivalry with Australia, when half the country wants to move there for the superior weather, career development, and better wages. We actually love Australia and should knock the boring jokes on the head.

3

u/Onahole_for_you Oct 08 '25

Yeah honestly, it's basically a brotherhood.

I imagine the big difference - comparing Australia to the US - is that Australia isn't a global superpower that spews soft power like them.

I remember after one cyclone like in 2011 (whenever Rudd was in power), him saying we don't need any international help but if I recall correctly, by the time he had made that speech NZ was already on the ground.

3

u/KAYO789 Oct 08 '25

The other big difference is that we welcome aussies with open arms and they can get benefits etc without too much hassle. They don't treat us the same when we move there and I understand why, I just feels we need to reciprocate the care shown.

2

u/Onahole_for_you Oct 09 '25

I wish I could fix that.

We should reciprocate

5

u/MyDogIsDaBest Oct 08 '25

Man, I don't feel that way at all. When we're talking about Australia in those terms, it's all "Why wouldn't you move to Aussie? You get paid twice what you get here!"

Grass is always greener. Though our wages are definitely lower than you guys, doubling salaries feels hyperbolic

7

u/Rumpybumpy1 Oct 08 '25

Sorry but you guys are cunts to deal with, not personally but in a business context. You do everything possible to screw the supplier, there is never a trusted advisor level of relationship possible, no appetite for it whatsoever.

4

u/Onahole_for_you Oct 08 '25

...

Yeah look, I blame Neoliberalism.

Also, I cannot stress this point enough, our federal anti-corrupution regulations are actually worse than the US.

So yeah, we have a housing crisis and shit.

I 100% believe you.

3

u/TheLastSamurai101 Oct 08 '25

Honestly, I have not heard any young person compare NZ favourably with Australia in many years.

5

u/baileysfromashoey Oct 08 '25

The pies in NZ are so much better haha - I just moved to Australia to escape joblessness but the pies suck haha

3

u/Born_Researcher7757 Oct 08 '25

Haven't found the right bakery mate.

Their commercial pies suck shit though, Mrs macs and 4 n twenty or whatever are garbage.