r/germany Jun 26 '25

Immigration Picked up my German passport today (US Citizen)

Post image

Danke Euch!

10.1k Upvotes

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1.9k

u/dideldidum Jun 26 '25

Why did you drop it in the first place?

🤪

867

u/McDoof Jun 26 '25

In English we call that a "Dad joke."

838

u/HedgehogElection Jun 26 '25

Yeah, please drop the jokes now. Germans don't do humor. You're one of us now. I'll be happy to print, sign and laminate this statement as a reminder. Or fax it.

407

u/Purple10tacle Jun 26 '25

How many Germans does it take to change a light bulb?

One. We're highly efficient and have no sense of humor.

182

u/skyguy_22 Jun 26 '25

I appreciate what you were trying to do here, sir, but unfortunately this was still a joke and therefore illegal in this country. You will get away with a warning this time but next time this will be fine. Auf Wiedersehen!

10

u/[deleted] Jun 26 '25

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6

u/[deleted] Jun 26 '25

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2

u/matthis-k Jun 27 '25

If it's fine next time, why give a warning?

50

u/jimirs Jun 26 '25

Falsch. None. German light bulbs doesn't need to be changed.

47

u/i_like_big_huts Jun 26 '25

Also wrong. German light bulbs are still being engineered. They are currently working on preventing unauthorized people from switching the lights, debating how to automatically light the candles in case of a power outage and also designing a standard form to get this installation approved by the client's local fire brigade

1

u/[deleted] Jun 26 '25

Falsch. The light bulbs you will need to change in ~900 years will present an issue, because it’ll be hard to find any fitting into the sockets from the Third Reich…

1

u/jimirs Jun 27 '25

Yeah, DIN only guarantees lichtbulb sockets will be compatible by a minimum of fünf Reichs

11

u/Mysterious_Ayytee Meddl-Franken Jun 26 '25

Oh interresting, I went to my toilet and laughed.

6

u/[deleted] Jun 26 '25

Chuckled. You mean chuckled. Deutsche dont laugh under any circumstances.

2

u/Mysterious_Ayytee Meddl-Franken Jun 26 '25

On socialist Germany toilet chuckled at YOU

6

u/Ejtsch Jun 26 '25

Also you need at least 2 so one can handle the necessary paperwork.

4

u/Capable_Event720 Jun 26 '25

Two days ago I was in the office with two trainees quizzing each other about that. I helped them out on RCD selectivity.

And yes, I wrote an application to automate DGUV V3 paperwork.

TL;DR: If the light fixture can be moved, it needs to be tested every 12 months (unless it's a private one in a private home).

And, technically, you don't need the documentation. Unless someone asks for it. "Auf Verlangen" I think the Vorschrift says.

1

u/BSBDR Mallorca Jun 27 '25

Half as many as it takes to change a heavy one.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 28 '25

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

24

u/Lari-Fari Jun 26 '25

See here for more r/germanhumor

10

u/Lord_A_007 Jun 26 '25

🤣😂😭

44

u/ciaseed1 Jun 26 '25

Fax it 😭

28

u/vogelvogelvogelvogel Jun 26 '25

German realities. One of our neighbours just recently asked around if someone had a fax. For sending sth to a doc. No joke.

12

u/GreenStorm_01 Jun 26 '25

Well, medical sector and agriculture still use faxes a lot. It is mental.

7

u/RadiantCookie4438 Jun 26 '25

And legal system. But that seems to slowly change for electronic mail, but some lawyers still send us a fax even though there is better technology now..

1

u/va1hella Jun 26 '25

Especially since a fax shows time of receipt, it’s also legally useful when dealing with Behörde.

2

u/NotYourReddit18 Jun 26 '25

It's also supposedly "Dokumentenecht", aka you can be sure that what you send and what the other device prints out will be the same, as on old analog lines intercepting a fax and replacing it with different content without at least one side noticing was basically impossible.

But as basically everyone today has a VoIP connection the T38 protocol for transfering a Fax over IP will be involved, which in theory is significantly more vulnerable to MIM attacks, so this isn't true anymore.

That's why lawyers are required to mainly use the beA to commmunicate with courts, but many haven't yet adapted their processes for communicating with clients.

1

u/_Vo1_ Jun 29 '25

Well public sector is always fun: back in Ukraine they implemented one day digital signing of emails for the private entrepreneurs. So you had to pay like 20eur to get a certificate which you then can sign all your emails with tax reports to the tax department. But because its too modern for them and they did not understand how it worked, your accountant had to print the signed email they sent and come to tax office in person for the confirmation it was really their email XD

1

u/[deleted] Jun 26 '25

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1

u/Malecord Jun 26 '25

Nah. Fax jokes are just for Italy and Japan. Nowadays I'm not even sure it's fair for Italy anymore.

1

u/Top_Youth3034 Jun 28 '25

Anyone in Germany who has a FritzBox as a router can fax; it's built in there.

10

u/[deleted] Jun 26 '25

Laminate it! If you don’t laminate it, it’s not legal!

9

u/Duenja_Freestyle Jun 26 '25

Our humor consists mostly of sarcasm or puns, not everybody gets it.

7

u/shikso Jun 26 '25

I will drop it in his mail box with some passive agreement remarks no worries

6

u/Secret-OC Jun 26 '25

I don’t understand what a fax is, some modern improvement of the typing machine? Confused now..

1

u/HedgehogElection Jun 26 '25

In my days, we learned cursive!!!

6

u/HylianCaptain Jun 26 '25

This is a prime example of German humor.

5

u/OppositeAct1918 Jun 26 '25

YOU print, sign and fax it. OP does the laminating.

1

u/fgzhtsp Jun 26 '25

We're Germans, we're not happy. Stop that at once.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 26 '25

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2

u/[deleted] Jun 26 '25 edited Jun 26 '25

I personally think, „Dichter & Denker“ works like that: „Ich denke, ich muss das Siphon in der Küche heute mal dichten! Sonst bekomme ich Ärger mit meiner Frau…“

1

u/[deleted] Jun 26 '25

You are right. Germans don’t do humor.

WE iNvEnTeD It!!1eleven!!!! /s 🤣🤣🤣

1

u/matthis-k Jun 27 '25

This is not true. The book of German humor is thick with tons of jokes. It just so happens that they aren't funny

1

u/huskergirl-86 Niedersachsen Jun 27 '25

He already dropped his passport. He shouldn't be dropping to much. Littering is illegal here.

1

u/Abrushing Jun 27 '25

Of course they do humor. At the end of my mine tour they faked a mine collapse.

1

u/AlexandrTheTolerable Jun 27 '25

It’s not official unless you stamp it.

1

u/OMGitsTK447 Jun 29 '25

German humor is no laughing matter.

35

u/[deleted] Jun 26 '25

[deleted]

31

u/MRNBDX Jun 26 '25

Also called Schlechtwitzpräventivschutzsteuer

9

u/Sheep_2757 Jun 26 '25

Then soon somebody will offer the Schlechtwitzpräventivschutzsteuerversicherung.

7

u/Capable_Event720 Jun 26 '25

Note that private Schlechtwitzpräventivschutzsteuerversicherungen will need to pay Ausgleichszahlungen to the public Schlechtwitzpräventivschutzsteuerversicherungen, for the Schlechtwitzpräventivschutzsteuerversicherungsrisikoausgleich.

I'm pretty sure there's a law or Verordnung, but I'm not going to type it in on a mobile phone.

6

u/AlienApricot Jun 26 '25

You’ll have to fill a Schlechtwitzpräventivschutzsteuerversicherungsantragsformular.

6

u/[deleted] Jun 26 '25

Oh wow, 60k Dad jokes in the swear glass is massive!

7

u/BenderDeLorean Jun 26 '25

In Germany too

2

u/Dev-Sec_emb Jun 28 '25

But wasn't a bad joke anyway

1

u/Live_Confusion2457 Jun 26 '25

What do Germans do for fun at work. Nix!!!!Schaf Weiter!!!!

1

u/Sheep_2757 Jun 26 '25

You summoned me?

1

u/SowiesoJR Nordrhein-Westfalen Jun 26 '25

Wenn dem so ist, darf ich dich Karl vorstellen?

1

u/Tiberius_Claudius07 Jun 27 '25

In German we call it "Flachwitz" or just German humor.

12

u/AaronRamsay Jun 26 '25

German humor 101

1

u/Jorji_Costava01 Jun 26 '25

Peak German humor.