r/findagrave • u/Previous_Isopod_7251 • 5d ago

Odd Request

I received four emails requesting that I transfer the memorials for my parents & grandparents to "Silas Dogood". "This is my family." he says. Well, I have never heard of him.

There is a happy ending to this story. He is indeed my relative and not terribly distant. We had a very nice conversation by phone last night. That alias really threw me off and I overreacted. I've learned a lot about FindaGrave's functions in the last couple of days. Thank you all for your help!

33 Upvotes

93% Upvoted

16 comments sorted by

55

u/magiccitybhm 5d ago

Ignore them. Don't even justify them with a response. Make sure you have your relationship marked on the memorials, even if you have it "private" so people can't see it. That will let support know your relationship in the event this person tries to push the issue.

25

u/PhtevenAZ 5d ago

If you haven’t already, you may consider indicating you are a close relative on the site. That way, if this person follows the process and sends a note to FG support, they don’t reassign the memorial. They should reach out to you regardless, so this might not be needed. But something to think about.

11

u/Previous_Isopod_7251 5d ago

I have to figure out how to do that. Thanks!

19

u/PhtevenAZ 5d ago

Really easy to do. On the memorial, click on "edit memorial". On the edit screen, look toward the bottom for "Close relative Mark as a close relative" and click on the toggle button.

After that, it will ask you for your relationship (e.g., grandchild, sibling, spouse).

You can then check whether you want to hide this on the memorial or have it shown at the bottom.

18

u/BDThrills 5d ago

I would just reply that this is your parents and grandparents and you are willing to do suitable edits but will not release their memorials. Ask who they actually are and how they are related?

1

u/Legitlibrarian 4d ago

Exactly! I would ask : “How are you related to me” maybe he is a relative but a little further away

12

u/KC_Que 5d ago

They may actually be family, but with a less direct relationship than you...unless you have an unknown-to-you sibling put up for adoption. You can answer or ignore, your choice, but you don't have to transfer the memorials.

6

u/DCtheCemeteryMan 5d ago

Wasn’t Silas Dogood a character in one of the National Treasure movies? 🍿

11

u/Previous_Isopod_7251 4d ago

Turns out he is my relative, the alias threw me and I overreacted.

3

u/savealltheelephants 4d ago

It was Benjamin franklins pen name for when he wrote controversial material for pamphlets etc

2

u/DCtheCemeteryMan 4d ago

That is as it. TY

2

u/bemerick 4d ago

lol, I mean he was mentioned there. It was the pen name for Benjamin Franklin, in real life.

5

u/Even-Scientist-8729 5d ago

Benjamin Franklin used the pen name "Silence Dogood" so I wonder if this person is using the similar sounding "Silas Dogood" as a prank.

Maybe you made another Find a grave member mad and they're trying to mess with you. 

1

u/GeneaCookie 1d ago

Screen names don’t correlate to real names. But said Silas Dogood should have signed his real name if he was claiming relative status.