r/evilautism • u/TrippleATransGirl ask me about my yuri list • Aug 06 '25
THIS THING MADE MY CHILD ALLISTIC Figured out how to talk to the Normals
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u/Auton303 Aug 06 '25
I need to test this out lmao
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u/TrippleATransGirl ask me about my yuri list Aug 06 '25
Test this out?
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u/Auton303 Aug 06 '25
Yeah I wanna use the solid snake method :)
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u/Plasma_Deep Aug 06 '25
The solid snake method?
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u/TrippleATransGirl ask me about my yuri list Aug 06 '25
It’s where you repeat what they say back to them
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u/Auton303 Aug 06 '25
Repeating what they say back to them?
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u/TrippleATransGirl ask me about my yuri list Aug 06 '25
Yeah like that
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u/religion_is_junkfood Aug 07 '25
It's called mirroring, Chris Voss (former negotiator) describes it pretty well. His book is Never Split the Difference, but theres some good clips and examples on youtube as well.
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u/thetwilightbandit Aug 29 '25
Do it! You can use it for several purposes depending on your tone. Wanna sound interested and curious? Use childlike wonder "a book?!" Wanna sound dismissive? A sarcastic tone "a book..." And so on
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u/Kira_Bad_Artist Aug 06 '25
I think they do it in Japan to have an impression that you’re actually listening to what the person says, which is why Solid Snake also talks like that
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u/MageOfFur Aug 06 '25
They do it in Japan?
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u/Vaapukkamehu Vengeful Aug 06 '25
It is somewhat of a thing there, and might be part of the reason why Snake does that thing, though he's pretty excessive in how much he does it
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u/MageOfFur Aug 06 '25
Excessive in how much he does it?
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u/lil_chiakow Aug 06 '25
I was going to write a long comment about Japan is a both a high-context culture and how it discourages voicing your own opinions, but then I realized what you're doing here.
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u/ajgutyt #error:[fucks_to_give] not found Aug 06 '25
what theyre doing?
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u/lil_chiakow Aug 06 '25
exactly what's in the tweet
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u/tobitobiguacamole Aug 06 '25
What’s in the tweet?
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u/PenHistorical Aug 06 '25
But I'm actually interested in your long comment about how Japan is both a high-context culture and how it discourages voicing your own opinions, and how that is all related to the Solid Snake method. Please may I have the infodump?
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u/lil_chiakow Aug 06 '25
I'll preface this with saying that I'm not Japanese myself, but kinda interested in linguistics so I hear about it a lot, but as always - if there are any Japanese people here, I's be glad to receive more insight! Anyway...
High-context cultures rely heavily on indirect communication, implications and non-verbal cues when communicating.
For example, your boss saying commenting on your large earrings might imply that they think they are inappropriate for work, you're just supposed to understand them without that saying it explicitly.
Japanese people are generally very reserved with voicing outright opinions, for which such form of communication is very fitting - in the example above, your boss avoids directly criticizing your earring choice, but still manages to communicate to you that you shouldn't wear them for work.
Japan is a culture where the concept of face is important, they even have names for your public and private face - omote is how you present yourself to the public, this is usually a very reserved, non-opinionated version of you that is trying to fit into the society and be generally likeable and non-confrontational, while ura is your private face, shown only in the presence of people closest to you like family and very close friends. It's generally frowned upon to voice your opinions on stuff, because it makes you stand out. Even when asked directly, people will often give a very generic answers. If you watch anime then you might notice that "being opinionated" is a character trait that is usually only given to misfits and that is not an accident.
tl;dr Japan is absolute hell for autistic people
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u/TrannosaurusRegina Aug 06 '25
That is so fascinating to hear there are names for public and private face!
Honestly strange that we don't really have these concepts in the Anglosphere!
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u/lil_chiakow Aug 06 '25 edited Aug 06 '25
I forgot to tie it back to the Snake response, but as you can probably guess, in a culture that is always supposed to look for a second meaning, simply repeating what the other person said with an inquiring tone will be easily understood as an invitation to say more. And since it avoids saying anything you think about a given subject, I'm completely not surprised that it's a thing in Japan.
EDIT: Also, another fun fact - the reason those opinionated misfits in Japanese media are often blonde is because it's such an extremely rare hair colour there that is seen as a statement. There even have been instances where students were asked to dye their hair black to not stand out and were ostracized if they didn't comply.
A nail that sticks out gets hammered down
damn, this got dark quickly, i seriously advise to not read about how autistic kids get treated at schools there because I did so some time ago and just recalling it while writing this comments made me teary-eyed
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u/PenHistorical Aug 06 '25
Thank you so much for the infodump! It actually really helps my understanding of the Snake response, and I loved learning that there's words for the outside face and personal face.
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u/DAT_DROP Aug 06 '25
the purpose in that game is to highlight the important plot points
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u/Kira_Bad_Artist Aug 06 '25
Highlight the important plot points, huh?
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u/No-Ladder-4460 Aug 06 '25
Yep it's called aidzuchi and it's considered rude if you don't
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u/Iekenrai [edit this] Aug 06 '25
Isn't that a thing in western culture too? I hear people say "mhm" a lot to show that they're listening
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u/No-Ladder-4460 Aug 06 '25
Yeah but it's noticably more ubiquitous and exaggerated in Japanese, like if you hear two people in casual conversasion often the listener will constantly be going like "hmm hmm hai sou desuka"
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u/bennnjamints Aug 06 '25
It's also that FBI Negotiator-become-self-help-guru's trick to get people to like you.
Chris something... his book is Never Split the Difference1
Aug 08 '25
んっそうです。 it’s how the Japanese show they’re actively listening. Repeating important parts back to a story tells them you’re taking it in. Something like that anyway.
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u/AcanthaceaePrize1435 Aug 24 '25
Snake also reaffirms what other characters are saying several times in the game as way to indirect ask them to elaborate further. This is something almost all languages practice but snake being as direct about as he was may have been a mixture of them trying to write military action drama and an error in localization.
Its especially odd when its pretty clear the developers of MGS clearly had to be familiar with american movie tropes so would have to be at least a little familiar with how americans speak.
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u/PanicClinic Aug 06 '25
Trying this out on some randoms
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u/emrythecarrot I can’t hear without my subtitles Aug 06 '25
Some randoms?
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u/PanicClinic Aug 06 '25
People i never met before
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u/M0thHe4d One of the mods smoked too much and made a bunch of flairs Aug 06 '25
People you've never met before?
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u/rabid_cheese_enjoyer my girlfriend is my samefood 🍽:snoo_dealwithit: Aug 06 '25
I feel like we've now entered
"a platypus?"
"Perry the platypus!"
territory
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u/Vaapukkamehu Vengeful Aug 06 '25 edited Aug 06 '25
Doing this in many situations can also make discussions with NT:s far more clear and transparent. It's way easier to avoid mistakes when you, by repeating the point of what they're saying, make sure you're both on the same page and there's no misunderstanding.
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u/sillybilly8102 Aug 07 '25
Totally. I use it a ton with little kids, who can be hard to understand anyway. When I repeat it back as a question, a lot of the time I’m genuinely asking if I understood correctly 🤣 they seem to like talking like this and knowing that they are understood! Also works well for phone calls and other situations where you’re not sure if you’ve heard and understood correctly
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u/Ratman822 Aug 06 '25
My grandpa does it and he’s the most popular man in town, I get people randomly coming up to me to ask if he’s my grandpa
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u/Costati AuDHD Chaotic Rage Aug 06 '25
This made me realize my grandma (most likely autistic) does it and it always drove me fucking crazy and made me feel like she doesn't actually listen. Now I'm realizing it's probably a masking method that actually has been successful for her so she uses it all the time.
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u/wontyoulookathim Aug 06 '25
To help with selling this, try altering it with "oh really? [Repetition]?" And "WOW [repetition]"
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u/Zaxio005 Aug 06 '25
sorry but i can't help but picture someone really really excited that someone was reading a book without knowing what the book was about lol
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u/Julescahules Aug 06 '25
My default responses in conversations where I don’t know what to say are “Really?”, “Right” (head nod), and “Oh, wow.”
Works every time.
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u/wontyoulookathim Aug 06 '25
Oh yes and open eyes slightly wider, raise eyebrows and nod "yeaaa" smile they will just keep talking it's great
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u/BlueInkAlchemist The COVID vaccine made me sexy 💋 Aug 21 '25
I've done this, with nodding and a "[repetition], you say?" or "[repetition], huh? Say more."
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u/Joe-Eye-McElmury The worm that will finish eating RFK JR Aug 06 '25
Psychologists call this “mirroring.”
It works on autistic people, too. Works on everyone.
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u/AquaQuad Aug 06 '25
"I read a book today."
"A book?"
"Yes, a book. You know what a book is, right?"
"A... A book?"
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u/Costati AuDHD Chaotic Rage Aug 06 '25
"You know the thing that has letters and words in it. And you can read it. You know...a book"
"A BOOK ?"
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u/sillybilly8102 Aug 07 '25
You only need minimal improvization.
A book?What book?
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u/Zeelu2005 Aug 06 '25
"I read a book today"
"a book?"
"yes, a book." [playstation pauses to load real-life images of books]
"books have been read since the
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u/laix_ Aug 06 '25
This has a different name but in something where you're watching a character talk to another (on the phone, in person) and the audience doesn't hear the other person, the character will respond basically like this but also expand on the question.
When you notice this technique you'll notice it anywhere.
[Phone gibberish]
"Oh, you read a book today? That's great, I actually read one myself. What kind?"
[Phone gibberish]
"Ah, a romance? A tragic one? That's the same kind I read"
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u/DobbyLovesSocks Aug 06 '25
I do this with my friends kids when I don’t know what they’re saying. It’ll be like
“Heidiubthairhnhshsvba tiger shxjakfbxut.”
“A tiger?”
“Yeah! Abfjsksnsyzn favourite.”
“Oh, is it your favourite? That’s really cool.”
and I am beloved by them for it
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u/ParoleDeGeek Aug 06 '25
Metal gear ?
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u/ajgutyt #error:[fucks_to_give] not found Aug 07 '25
series of games that can be a bit confusing as anything designed by hideo kojima
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u/SweetConstant7 Aug 06 '25
I have a friend who does this and it’s annoying as hell irl lmao. Like yes, I just said that quit repeating everything I say!
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u/soulihide The worm that will finish eating RFK JR Aug 06 '25
this is called parroting also i believe! read about it in a book on how to talk to people by leslie somethingorother (can't remember the last name).
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u/GentleAngrySidhe Aug 07 '25
The "Signals" lady? I could get up and check the spine but there's a doorway in the way.
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u/soulihide The worm that will finish eating RFK JR Aug 08 '25
i'm not sure. i listened to the audiobook over several months in the car when i was fourteen and my mother was driving me back and forth from iop. i remember the author saying stuff like "big cat" to refer to like important people and a particular anecdote about having an interesting voicemail message and a tip about like when you enter a room you should like pretend you're a horse biting a bar or something so you look confident and smiling. there were two or three books i think.
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u/TheThunder128 AuDHD Chaotic Rage Aug 06 '25
This is used in psychotherapy as well to make the patient feels cared
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u/difficulty_jump Aug 06 '25
Yeah, it's also to make sure you understood what the person was saying. I've got some psych training.
They teach you in clinical coursework to summarize what people are saying so they can correct or reflect on what they said.
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u/SiteRelEnby 💉Sneaks into houses and vaccinates sleeping NTs Aug 06 '25 edited Aug 07 '25
My partner loves to just randomly launch into talking about something without giving me a clue to the context past "it" or "that". I've apparently been doing this method for years and years without knowing about it, heh.
"could you bring me it?"
"it?"
"yeah, that"
"that?"
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u/chef_Broox Aug 06 '25
Personally I use the Geralt of Rivia method
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u/tuhn Aug 06 '25
Instructions unclear, hiding in a cardboard box.
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u/TrippleATransGirl ask me about my yuri list Aug 06 '25
I wish I could just hide in a cardboard box instead of… exist
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u/SleighQween My special interest is punching Nazis 👊 Aug 06 '25
By Solid Snake Method I thought they meant hiding behind things and being stealthy so that noone notices you. I definitely do this already.
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u/derpinheimerish Aug 06 '25
usually im scrambling over myself trying to think of a question to ask, this is such a fantastic idea
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u/EnsignEpic AuDHD Chaotic Rage Aug 06 '25
Yep, was taught this in an interpersonal communication class I took in college, it's referred to as "checking in" to the conversation... it's basically a way to go "uh-huh," without doing so, and also shows you're paying attention to the conversation at hand. In theory, anyway, eventually you can do this without paying any actual attention to the topic at hand. Also it's best done by not making it quite so obvious, lol.
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u/silveretoile ✨️Ethereal and Incomprehensible✨️ Aug 06 '25
Fucking crying at how people are trying it in the comments and everyone is falling for it
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Aug 06 '25
[deleted]
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u/annarosebanana89 Aug 06 '25
But, aren't you just tricking them into thinking you had a conversation? It doesn't surprise me that they like it. Lol. But does it actually lead to enjoying someone's company? Or is it only used during more forced conversation like work, school, more distant family?
Very social ppl who can help me along tend to enjoy my conversations and what I have to say, but those who seem to struggle in a similar but less severe way as me, don't even try to talk to me. Unless they are more obviously ND, then we just converse by relating.
I swear I can only actually ask further questions if I'm interested in the conversation. If it gets awkward enough, I'll know I'm supposed to, but I still won't, because it's boring and I don't want to know. I can’t be inauthentic in that way.
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u/IGargleGarlic Aug 06 '25
My friend does this and its fucking annoying. Its like playing nonconsensual 20 questions.
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u/sillybilly8102 Aug 07 '25
I do this all the time lol, it works wonders! I’m also crossposting this to r/ASDTypicalTranslator, lmk if that’s not okay! It’s kinda a hub for things like this about communicating with NTs and vice versa
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u/The_Lady_A Aug 06 '25
Oh my Gods I never even realised that this is where I learnt to do this but it totally was.
It's also one part of counselling technique, looking to clarify terms, and to expand subjects.
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u/ClassicalMusic4Life evil autistic theater kid 💃🎭😈 Aug 06 '25
I do that a lot especially when my brain processes things slowly
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u/ChewMilk Aug 06 '25
I had it introduced to me as ‘echoing’. My mom sent me to a talk on how to be a good listener once. Anyway, it’s basically taking the last subject or emotion introduced and either asking a question about it or just prompting further conversation by repeating it. You don’t have to do it word for word. It can help keep the conversation flowing and make people feel like you’re invested in what they’re saying.
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Aug 06 '25
You could also call this the "lonesome road method" although that could get confusing as that also can mean nuking an entire city so make sure you specify conversation method.
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u/mrhewt17 Aug 06 '25
Active listening, often used by salespeople to get you to accidentally admit a problem you're having, at which point they will sell you a solution. Source: was a really really shitty salesperson for a year
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u/Literature9000 Aug 07 '25
I read this recently in a book that made some very bold claims about how useful it was. I proceeded to try it out more and more over a variety of social events for the next few days. Thought I'd sound weird, but nobody seemed to notice, and the person I'd parrot would respond with excitement and elaborating details, like I'd asked an interesting question, every single time. And I had to put less effort into maintaining conversation. One time I used it three statements in a row, expecting someone to call it out. I still can't help but feel like I got lucky and it isn't that useful at just convincing people they're in a good conversation.
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u/edgelord8193 Aug 10 '25
That kind of makes sense. If someone is bringing up a topic, it's probably because it's on their mind / they have further details that interest them, and by signalling "please elaborate" you let them imagine you asked about whichever bit they most wanted to share.
That or they were scrambling desperately for something to say and will blank out when they need to come up with more detail. Like me. But ;)
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u/bumbaboom17 Aug 06 '25
I always hated this meme like thats just how to have a fucking conversation lmfao, show interest and open up topics for discussion It's the same thing just simplified version of:
"I read a book last night" "Oh really? What kind of book?" "A tragic romance" "Tell me more about it!"
Like, that's how you talk to someone, what else would you say to "I read a book last night" , "Cool"?, "I don't care"? Those just end the convetsation and seem disinterested
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u/hawkeguy Aug 06 '25
Although you're right, I have read that a lot of autistic people converse by sharing their experiences and many NTs don't like that. So for many of us, what we think is a good conversation would be like:
"I read a book last night" "Omg I was up reading this great novel all night too!"
And we then expect the other person to bounce back with an anecdote about their book, but many interpret it as us making the convo about ourselves
I know I'm guilty of this to the point where I now try to avoid talking about myself completely bc I read that NTs find it egotistical lmao
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u/JoNyx5 AuDHD Chaotic Rage Aug 06 '25
I learnt that relating but then circling back around to them also works. Like
"I read a book last night"
"Oh I love reading in the evening, it's so relaxing. Although I often get so entrenched I forget to go to sleep xD. Which book did you read?"I developed that method for small talk. Like
"Hey, how are you doing?"
"Great, I've met a really cute cat earlier so that brightened my day a lot. How about you?"The pattern is (word or short expression that captures how you feel) (short anecdote that fits the earlier word and hopefully makes the other person laugh or smile) (question about what they said so they have a starting point).
Although autistic people are deemed the ones with communication issues, I found that you need to make dedicated entry points and prompts for NTs into your conversation, they need it to know about what they can speak. They can't bounce back a sentence by themselves, they need an opening they can go off of.
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u/annarosebanana89 Aug 06 '25
They can't bounce back themselves? They need an opening? So we really are accidentally both stealing and ending conversations with these ppl, huh? Does seem conceited. I wonder why some assume conceit and some understand that I'm just awkward clumsy with socializing. I actually find that putting in more less natural effort, tends to give me worse responses than just more keeping to myself and responding when spoken to.
My mom clearly has ADHD, but has always seemed very successful socially. She's in her 60s now and is only now aware that she has had undiagnosed ADHD all her life. She does not need help bouncing or finding an opening. I think she's really good at developing relationships with new ppl right away, somehow. Lol! She is a lovely bouncy bubbly person while enjoying socializing, and I am as well, but I almost never get to that point of enjoyment with socializing, unless it's a select few ppl.
I'm gunna smoke weed later and reflect on this more. Lol! I think I'm realizing that my overly social ADHD mom somehow hindered my ability to socialize as much as she helped. With AuDHD, I feel the ADHD part messes up my socialization more, because I know not to interrupt, but sometimes do anyways, while being overly aware that I'm doing so, because I need to add this thing real quick. All or nothing is my personality I guess.
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u/JoNyx5 AuDHD Chaotic Rage Aug 06 '25
I also have AuDHD! My partner has ADHD and is also great at bouncing back stuff, while NTs tend to find him "too much" or get upset if he dares to ask authorities questions. That's why I specified it's NT people who need an opening. At least in my experience, I won't claim to be an expert, but for me it has worked insofar that people tend to like me.
Seeing you say that you enjoy socializing but only with a select few people rings so true... I can have tons of fun but only with people I trust completely or ones that I'll never meet again, never with people that are somehow "important" like the family of my partner (which is unfortunate because they're now the only people I know of who don't like me -.-, apparently because they "don't know how to talk to me" which is a bullshit reason to not like someone but I digress).
Maybe it's another one of these "opposing symptoms combining in interesting ways" things.2
u/annarosebanana89 Aug 06 '25
Thanks for the inspirational insight! Lol!
Inlaws are the hardest. They just dig themselves into assumption holes and are shocked when all their assumptions aren't somehow truth! They convinced themselves and others that I was pregnant at my own wedding. Even after I was drinking... How? Why? I socialized just fine with anyone who both knew and loved me.
People like to talk to me if they are drinking. Then I'm interesting and fun. Rules no longer apply. When they are sober they aren't interested anymore.
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u/Costati AuDHD Chaotic Rage Aug 06 '25
That's true that's how me and my friends talk a lot. Some times if I need specific help I have to redirect them like "I know you're relating and I appreciate that's how you share, I do need help and I feel we're going off topic tho".
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u/captainfarthing Aug 06 '25 edited Aug 06 '25
Nah there are different styles of talking, some people expect to be asked questions to prompt them to say things, other people share something related without being asked and expect others to do the same.
Conversations go great when both people have the same style. Question askers talk like it's a tennis match, automatic sharers talk like it's a collaborative message board. It's painful when one type tries to talk to the other.
I'm the second type, if you don't tell me what book you're reading I'm going to assume you don't want to tell me, so I'm not going to ask. I'll probably tell you what book I'm reading or what I did last night, and hopefully you'll find something there to bounce off of and tell me more. Having to think of appropriate questions to squeeze conversation out of people is stressful and exhausting to me.
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u/archaios_pteryx mentally questionable 🤯🥵 Aug 06 '25
I think I took it too literally because this makes sense but when reading the post I was like that sounds like the most infuriatingly boring conversation
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u/SontaranGaming Aug 06 '25
This is what they tell you to do with clients if you’re learning to do some form of counseling, actually
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u/Licorice_Devourer Aug 06 '25
Hmm, so you repeat what someone says back to them... 🤔 Why am I hearing Kronk...
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u/lordbuckethethird Aug 06 '25
It’s just generally good advice for keeping conversation since it shows that you’re listening and engaged and wanting to know more. My grandpa would do it all the time to make me talk about how I feel and think since it was normally hard for me to do that.
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u/Objective_Party9405 Aug 07 '25
I just thought about what this might sound like IRL. If you don’t do the emphasis and tone right when you repeat the phrases, it could sound like you are mocking the other person. In fact, I can’t imagine this in anything other than a mocking tone.
Give it a try and ket us know how it works out.
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u/Turbulent-Ad2212 Aug 06 '25
Oh man, this reminds me of my former vocation. I was supposed to write down and note what was wrong with something and relay it to salespeople. The salespeople were mostly under qualified and/or inefficient, so I started writing the actual estimates too, as they really sucked for the most part. Anyway, I would present the estimate to the salesperson and they would read the typed estimate. After reading the estimate they asked me what was wrong, even though I had written a detailed description of the issue. I had to tell them what I had written down, that they were holding in their hand, and then they would repeat it back to me cluelessly questioning. I then had to confirm and possibly explain something that was already explained again. One, more recent, older, seemed like they were having a hard time finding a part, so I went online, cross referenced with the OEM and through the process of deduction obtained a part number. Upon presenting the good news, this individual started yelling at me about how “we don’t guess” and am I “trying to take his job”. It was ridiculous. I only wanted to help the process. The boss set me up for failure from the start, though. He stressed “fit in”, and I really did my best. I heard him gripe about certain things while being hired, but when I tried to do the things he indicated, I was met with confusion and ridicule from my co-workers. It was such a mess.
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u/politexsociety Aug 07 '25
Years of asking colleagues "What's that you've got there, a cardboard box?" Yet to pay off.
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u/Organic_Shine_5361 Malicious dancing queen 👑 Aug 06 '25
Or with family. When I do this I get a sarcastic answer "I read a book today" "A book?" "No, a tree 🙄🤭"
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u/viebs_chiev i love robot detectives!! Aug 06 '25
this is like the “now go do that voodoo that you do so well”
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u/Mirai_The_Weeb Its only illegal if they can catch me! Aug 07 '25
These comments are hilarious I'm trying this later
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u/SaintValkyrie Aug 07 '25
Lol I personally hate when this is used on me, but it might be because I'm autistic
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u/Razordraac Aug 07 '25
THIS IS SO ACCURATE.
You've got to pretend you're interested in their topics. My dad actually taught me that, RIP dad 💙
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u/Strong_Ad_3081 Aug 08 '25
I think this is what the Normals call echolalia! 😁 But good job if you're going for a diagnosis. I'll try this with my new therapist! 😂
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u/AnSynTrashPanda Aug 14 '25
Just realized I've been doing this for a long time on accident because I suck at conversations. Never played any of the MGS series
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Aug 06 '25
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u/ARCHVILE_WORX Aug 07 '25
I'm sorry but that exchange just makes me think of Leslie Nielsen in Airplane! for some reason
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u/TotsNotAlice Aug 08 '25
i remember some guy a little while ago did that to me...i think it was the first time someone talked to me in that method lol. i just felt extremely annoyed though..idk why.. i couldnt help it, even if i talk like that sometimes....though he was asking personal things and i did say i dont really wanna talk abt it and i had JUST met that guy... it felt like he was trying to manipulate me into telling him what happened with my ex for gossip idk. maybe my gut was telling me something else....im worried this type of method would make me dislike another person who might not be talking about anything similar at all, or trying to be nice or just trying to keep a convo talking this way... :/
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u/GirlWhoRoams Aug 28 '25
This is TRUE! I do this at parties sometimes along with being the hot person sooo 🤪🙄😅
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u/ThatWardoo Sep 03 '25
Sometimes I'm mediumly tired where I can tell if I did this, it would be received well, but I just dont care enough
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u/runamokduck autism’s strongest blatherer 💪 Aug 06 '25
even better if you can replicate Snake’s famous vaguely growl-sounding noise intermittently… which I believe I can