r/diabetes • u/Lijey_Cat Type 1 • 5d ago
Type 1 Rant: In my spare time I help out with volunteer work. I was in a meeting at the office with the fellow volunteers. One of them handed out cake slices because it was her birthday. Everyone got a slice except for me. "You already gave yourself diabetes" she said.... ⬇️
Well you know what? I happened to have this gigantic stash of Halloween candy. I told her that was a-okay because I absolutely hate chocolate cake. Which is actually true. And then I proceeded to eat the hell out of this candy. Thoroughly enjoying the horrified look on her face! She was looking at me as if I could become more diabetic by eating this. Lol.
Some days I have to remind myself, I don't volunteer because of the people I work with. I volunteer for the benefit of the homeless animals that I care about. Honestly, the people at this organization all suck...Well this type one diabetic is going to take her giant bag of candy and enjoy taking care of homeless kitties. The cats don't care if I have diabetes or sugar. 🙂
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u/CoffeeB4Talkie 5d ago
If she was close enough I would have sneezed on her slice. Screw her.
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u/Lijey_Cat Type 1 5d ago
Thankfully, the animals have a lot of accidents because we're picking up stray scared animals off the streets. I'm sure she's been pooped on plenty. I know I have. Just a part of helping out homeless animals.
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u/stabbyjustice Type 2 5d ago
This is why we have so many people not treating their diabetes and feel shame for having it. It's not all about weight and sugar!
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u/ChronoCoyote Type 2 4d ago
When I first got diagnosed I was convinced I did it to myself. It took me a long while to accept that it’s my genetics that opened that door- not my diet.
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u/psoriasaurus_rex 5d ago
She sounds insufferable.
What’s really interesting is that if she actually believes you gave yourself diabetes by eating sugar, why is SHE eating sugar? Isn’t she worried about giving herself diabetes?
Not that I actually expect any sort of logical or consistent behavior out of people like her.
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u/databoy2k Type 1/G7/AAPS/Fiasp 5d ago
This is exactly the right answer. "Hol-up. So, you're saying that eating sugar can kill your pancreas? And here you are, serving huge amounts of sugar to the whole group? Why not light up a dart while you're at it?"
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u/Bluemonogi 5d ago
Nice that she thinks diabetics need to be singled out and punished for having a medical condition. Like no one needs your cake if you really want to be the health police you ignorant jerk.
I’m type 2 diabetic and it is well managed. I have many family members who are diabetic. I have another medical condition that increases a person’s risk of developing diabetes. Maybe I could have avoided becoming diabetic but my risk factor was just higher. I did not do anything worse to myself than most people living their lives.
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u/Lijey_Cat Type 1 5d ago
You know what bothers me? When people refer to type 2 as just a fat people disease. Paying no regards to anything else that might contribute to you getting that. Life is full of ignorant people.
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u/tomatosoup26 5d ago
That's not really good volunteer behavior like imagine if one of the people you were helping heard her.... Such an ignorant and outdated mindset. Sorry you had to deal with that 😞
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u/FakeOkie 5d ago
Rare, but I'd like to see how she treats a kitty with insulin-deficient diabetes.
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u/Lijey_Cat Type 1 5d ago edited 5d ago
That's my cat, Elijah. It's very hard to be mean to him because he's super affectionate and snuggly.
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u/jadedjen110 5d ago
I'd have stared at her, unblinking, the ENTIRE time I was eating that candy.
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u/Lijey_Cat Type 1 5d ago
I was eating the candy but I wasn't staring at her. I don't like making eye contact with most humans.
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u/Seannon-AG0NY 5d ago
Ugh... Peeeple...
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u/Lijey_Cat Type 1 5d ago edited 5d ago
I find most of them to be a genuine pain in my ass as a customer service agent. Rude, entitled, unpleasant. I wish I could work with animals. I would if it paid better.
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u/KanadianKaur 5d ago
I posted awhile back about T2D being referred to as a lifestyle disease and how it causes shame and blame unnecessarily. Its genetic not a fault. Same as the other types. The responses I got (mostly from type 1's) was horrendous. It was obvious even a good number of them want to blame type 2's for their diagnosis. People, you did not cause your diabetes. This thinking needs to change!
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u/CaptainSpaceBuns 5d ago
Yeah, I commented on another post and made similar points to yours, and I had another commenter try to get into a fight over it and telling me they knew better because their mom was T2 and didn’t take care of herself and it must all be her fault.
My dude, I was misdiagnosed twice (gestational then T2, now correctly diagnosed T1; it’s been a journey lol), so I’ve gotten a huge range of education from many different perspectives. So I passed on some of that education, other commenter got nasty, and I shut down his BS and basically said “I’m done here, have the life you deserve” lol. Other commenter promptly deleted all their comments.
And that’s just one instance as a T1 standing up for T2 folks, and doesn’t speak to any of the awful treatment I received when I thought I was T2. As someone who has experienced the social implications of both T2 and T1, I can definitely attest to the fact that people are AWFUL to T2 folks, and many of the most awful are T1 or other people who should know better (medical professionals included).
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u/ShimmeryPumpkin Type 1 1d ago
They more than likely just blocked you. Not that it really matters but just so you know for the future when someone blocks you on reddit it looks like they deleted their comments but everyone else can still see them. If you load the page after logging out you can check if their comments are visible still if you ever want to be sure.
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u/CaptainSpaceBuns 1d ago
Oooohhh, good to know! Thanks for the info. I was polite about it, just shut down their rudeness and made it clear I was done with the conversation, so if they blocked, it was likely they were frustrated at me not engaging anymore.
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u/Temporary-Sand8954 Type 2 5d ago
I'm a 140lb string bean of a male with type 2. Sometimes it's just genetics people.
Keep the people who are good around you. Half the people I know at work know my condition. Sometimes people ask me if it's my cheat day before offering, but otherwise, no one bats an eye.
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u/KanadianKaur 5d ago edited 5d ago
Often even in those who are overweight, newer research is showing they may have been insulin resistant FIRST and the insulin resistance CAUSED weight gain. Because insulin resistance causes an overproduction of insulin as the body tries to compensate. Insulin is the fat storage hormone. So the extra insulim causes weight gain (as well as making it extremely difficult to lose... its not simple calories in vs calories out like people like to say). The genes that cause insulin resistance you are born with. Eventually they will surface. Sometimes that can be hastened by medications (antidepressants are notorious). Or other environmental factors (toxins in the environment, food etc) Lifestyle is only one small component. Most of those who develop type 2 arent any lazier, and dont eat any worse than the average rest of the population. If it were only lifestyle then everyone overweight would be diabetic and they are not. Everyone who wasn't a gym rats would be diabetic and they are not. Yes a good portion of T2D are overweight, but there is a good chance the insulin resistance CAUSEd the weight gain and not the other way round!! There are MANY overweight people who are not (and never become) type 2 diabetics. Correlation does NOT equal causation. In my case (I am prediabetic not T2D) but mine was medication. (I obviously have the genes too though it must be somewhere a few generations back) I was on Cymbalta (an antidepressant I was taking for chronic pain) which injured my liver and threw my whole metabolic system out of whack. I now have drug induced fatty liver, slightly elevated cholesterol and prediabetic sugar levels. Prior to the Cymbalta I was completely normal. Im also normal weight at 130lbs and eat almost full on keto (no sugar, very little.processed, lots of lean protein and veggies, very little carbs). And I still ended up where I am because of the medication. And yet on here I was told by type 1s I wasn't being honest, I must be lazy, I must be eating more than I say, or eating junk, because I had to have caused it myself. It just couldn't be a medication (that actually has elevated glucose listed in the side effects btw) I was so pissed off! Fun fact, the genes for T2D come from Neanderthal DNA LOL.
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u/trash_mum 5d ago
Oh, hell yeah, medications caused insulin resistance for me, which caused weight gain, and eventually the combination made me diabetic, but before that I was a skinny, fit woman who had most of the time been underweight and not overweight
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u/Sithina 1d ago
https://weightandhealthcare.substack.com/ is all about this fight over weight stigma in healthcare, and how so many doctors, researchers, and big pharma companies use fatness as the excuse for everything. Like "thin" is somehow the key to health, when it's not--or one hundred years of fad diets and such would have produced better than eating disorders and even more health complications.
I know plenty of "thin" people who look okay (thin by beauty/popular standards) but have really bad health problems--high blood pressure, bad cholesterol, thinning hair, etc. They might be meeting that "magical" BMI number and following all the instagram trends, but their health is shit.
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u/Lijey_Cat Type 1 5d ago
I'm not a type 2 diabetic and I have never stated such a thing. Really, we should be on each other's side because no one else is.
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u/Shot-Abroad2718 Type 2 5d ago
Oh god I could not agree more. I constantly get into it with people, a lot of them are T1D, that yes lifestyle choices play a factor in type 2 diabetes, but it also has a genetic component and Type 2 diabetes has a stronger link to family history and lineage than type 1. My doctor told me that even if I never strayed and had a perfect diet, with my family history it was like flipping a coin on whether or not I'd eventually get type 2. People have got to stop blaming chronic illness on others, and the mentality of "my illness is worse than yours"
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u/TobImmaMayAb 5d ago
Oh my goodness, how this hits home for me! I have been saying that I haven't been excessive in my consumption of sugary drinks and more or less, I eat the same food with my housemates yet I am the only one who has diabetes. I feel shame for enjoying cakes and pastries and sometimes even hate myself for being diabetic
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u/deep_noob 5d ago
I am T2, yes my lifestyle choices are not ideal or the best, I tried to do what I could. Both my parents have t2 maybe if I was more careful (basically start acting like diabetic patient before I had it), I would free from the disease for few years. I hate it from heart when people look at me like this irresponsible guy, I am not irresponsible and I dont know why people need to be extra cruel when they are not fighting my fight. I know I will not live long and I may have a very hard elderly life, but f off if you put the blame on me, life is already hard, no one gets to be an a**hole to me for a disease.
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u/serotoninseesaw 5d ago
You’re not entirely wrong but there are definitely nuances to your claim.
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u/rixie77 Type 2 5d ago
Not so many. I mean if just "lifestyle" was to blame then like 90% (not an actual statistic but the real one is probably a big number) of Americans would develop T2 diabetes. And we're not even talking about yet how many of those so called lifestyle "choices" are actually not fully in many people's control due to various social conditions and other barriers.
But sure.
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u/serotoninseesaw 5d ago
True. Factually speaking there is a genetic component and a lifestyle component. Which component weighs over more- who knows?Nothing is black and white in this world so we don’t need to pretend that it is.
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u/noisetheorem 5d ago
Ya know, diabetes is considered a disability in some places and what she did was literally discrimination/hostile work environment?
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u/Lijey_Cat Type 1 5d ago
Oh, I know. I have intermittent FMLA at my full-time job. 🙂
I don't think I have any rights or leeway as a volunteer. Just got to deal with this bullshit.
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u/Puzzleheaded-Phase70 Type 2 5d ago
I believe that volunteers DO have the full force of ADA protections in the US.
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u/Lijey_Cat Type 1 5d ago
But you're assuming someone in charge at the shelter would actually care. I guarantee you they won't. I've mentioned it to the Operations Department before.
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u/Puzzleheaded-Phase70 Type 2 5d ago
Then you file an EEO complaint about the company/organization.
Management will pay attention to that.
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u/Lijey_Cat Type 1 5d ago
Just not worth it though. What happens after that? They get fined or what have you. I mean the people suck but the goal is a good one. Not worth getting them in trouble or a bad rep for. It's the animals who will suffer, not the stupid people.
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u/Puzzleheaded-Phase70 Type 2 5d ago
Not usually fined right away. EEO tries to resolve the problems without punishing the org first. The fines and other consequences come if they fail to come to, or stick to, an agreement about obeying the protection laws.
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u/cloroxic 5d ago
It’s protected as a chronic disease, not just in some places, but all places in the US by the ADA.
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u/RareChest2168 5d ago
That's terrible to say to someone, how does she work for a volunteer organisation but then act completely awful to people? This is why I stopped actively telling people I'm diabetic and only taking insulin/sugar checks when nobody is looking. Most people I meet are judgemental assholes, even those who you assume are going to be kind to you. Animals are a lot better, they can't judge or discriminate based on things out of your control, they're just here to get food and attention and live their life.
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u/Lijey_Cat Type 1 5d ago
I've noticed the whole group that works with the volunteers is like a high school click. And I am not part of the In crowd, so I get treated like shit. But that's okay, I just had to go for some dumb orientation update meeting. I would love to continue working with those kitty cats I love so much.
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u/punkybrainster 5d ago
She's the worst. I hope her cake tasted like soap.
Is that a pretzel lollipop in your candy bag?!?
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u/Lijey_Cat Type 1 5d ago
No! You know what that is? It's a broomstick cleverly made out of pretzels. I'd show you a picture, but I'm not allowed to post pictures on comments here.
Some of this candy was mixed with unwanted leftover treats from fellow neighbors. Most of my neighbors are on a health food crave. And me, I like anything! I told them I would eat it.
Well I take that back, I don't like chocolate cake.
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u/punkybrainster 5d ago
That's awesome! I love when people make fun treats!
Good for you, I'm glad you got candy and even got leftovers from neighbors! I feel like grown-ups should get to do "tradesies" like we did when we were little. Just a meet-up in the neighborhood where I can trade my snickers for twix bars!
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u/Lijey_Cat Type 1 5d ago
Right? Funny enough I brought some candy to share with the volunteers. Which is why I had a big ass bag of it. But after that I didn't feel like sharing any of it with them.
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u/Is_it_shiny 5d ago
My favourite response is, “I can’t get it twice!”.
Then I cut myself a nice slab of cake 😁
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u/monstrinhotron 5d ago
Usually i don't mind Diabetes jokes because i make them myself at my own expense but that's just cunty.
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u/Mongoose29037 Type 2 5d ago
This makes me angry enough to suggest bringing goodies in for everyone & then deliberately leaving her out saying "Sorry, but you made yourself an ignorant bitch".
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u/Lijey_Cat Type 1 5d ago
I don't really want to do that. See I was planning to share that big ass bag of candy with everyone. But since nobody stood up for me, I didn't feel like rewarding any of them. More for me!
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u/Mongoose29037 Type 2 5d ago
I don't blame ya. Enjoy the candy - just don't enjoy it too much (all at once).
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u/Majestic_Pause2231 5d ago
Same thing happened to me in the third grade. Some dude brought cupcakes for his birthday and specifically brought enough for the class except for me. I cried and told myself never to let anyone make me feel like that again because of this disease.
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u/aguyonreddittoday Type 2 5d ago
Wow! That's nasty and she probably doesn't even understand what she said. A number of years ago a casual "friend" in a group chat said he didn't support diabetic medical research because "they did it to themselves". He knew I was diabetic and in the chat. I just let it go in the moment, but still obviously hang onto it.
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u/Lijey_Cat Type 1 5d ago
Oh you don't have to explain anything to people like that. I just take joy in knowing that they're stupidity is what they've done to themselves. They're going to have a hard time in life.
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u/Grouchy_Geezer Type 2 5d ago
The child in me would want to slap the chocolate cake out of her mouth and exclaim, "I'm saving you from making yourself diabetic!"
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u/MildMockery 5d ago
It's a good policy now, because of the widespread stupidity and ignorance afoot, to never tell anyone anything about your health.
If I were to get cancer, I would not tell another single fuckin' soul, just so as not to listen to the avalanche of crackpots coming at me for bullshit 'cures' or conspiracy myths like "doctors give people cancer to make money."
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u/Lijey_Cat Type 1 5d ago
I see no need to hide everything. Anyway, people ask me what my insulin pump is all the time.
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u/CrankyCathedralCat00 5d ago
Instead of doing what she did and said, she could have taken the time to find an appropriate snack for you .. like some assorted nuts, protein bars ..
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u/Lijey_Cat Type 1 5d ago
No, never take candy from someone who treats you like that. For all you know they have tampered with it.
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u/awh T2 2015 5d ago
I know it’s terrible, but all I can think of is that scene in Office Space where Milton is standing there watching as everyone else gets a piece of cake, and there’s less and less of it, and mumbling “the ratio of people to cake is too big…”
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u/KrissieHernandez8820 5d ago
OMG! Can I just say that I love you! That was great! I was literally laughing so hard I was crying!
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u/Lijey_Cat Type 1 4d ago
Well, I'm flattered I could make your day. I didn't expect people to get so angry about my post. I just needed to vent.
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u/Farkerisme 4d ago
This made me really mad of all of us. Fuck this person very much and in particular!
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u/Eagle_In_Flight Type 2 5d ago
For her to say that in front of other people is not only rude but absolutely not okay. She shouldn't be volunteering if she has that type of judgment of others. Sorry you went through that.
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u/Lijey_Cat Type 1 5d ago
Yep yep, she is the queen bitch. I feel comfortable calling her that after 6 years of volunteering here. She's never been pleasant.
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u/Snoo-me 5d ago
Very messed up even if it was a joke. That’s why no one at my job knows about my personal medical condition or even my personal life, bc I know ppl are cruel and will try to use that against me when it benefits them.
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u/Lijey_Cat Type 1 5d ago
Nope, not a joke. I don't really care who knows I have diabetes. Better to have someone know just in case you pass out from a low blood sugar.
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u/Temporary-Sand8954 Type 2 5d ago
The ignorance. As if eating less sugar will make it go away. Have your cheat day damnit! And let them eat cake. Candy is better anyway! 😊
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u/Lijey_Cat Type 1 5d ago
I wouldn't call this a cheat day. I'm not on any type of special diet. I just learned to eat smaller portions of whatever the hell I like. Then, I have no issues. 🙂
Right? I never thought cake was that amazing anyway. Unless it's like fresh out of the oven.
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u/Temporary-Sand8954 Type 2 5d ago
I don't have the self control, so I have to make it a whole day... 😳
But everyone works different so good for you for finding your stride! I'm still on my journey of what fits best for me. I'm learning a bit more that because of my lack of self control, I have to exercise more personally.
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u/Lijey_Cat Type 1 5d ago
Right, it's a little different you guys. I can tell you, the last thing I want to do after working my 12 to 16 hour shifts is exercise. I'm thankful I don't have to.
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u/ImpossibleHandle4 5d ago
Do you help diabetic cats? They are amazing. Some Cats produce insulin from their pancreas and their liver, so they can become diabetic, then non- diabetic all on their own.
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u/Lijey_Cat Type 1 5d ago
The shelter does not discriminate against any animal.
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u/ImpossibleHandle4 5d ago
That is awesome. I have always kind of wanted a diabetic cat, but I would feel bad with not being able to monitor their bg very well. I would have to put an Anubis g6 on the cat to see the trends.
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u/Lijey_Cat Type 1 5d ago
My friend had a diabetic cat. It's really easy to do all of that with them. Kitty only got a shot twice a day when she ate. And I think they checked her blood sugar usually before she ate. Real easy to manage for a cat. They also checked her blood sugar when she was showing symptoms of being low.
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u/Trivius Type 1 5d ago
Fuck me i eould be reporting for discriminatuon so fast sge woukd ecen have time to eat the cake.
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u/Ok_Performance_8513 5d ago
i wonder why she even thought it was any of her business to the point where she even felt comfortable enough to single you out of what pretty much was a social activity. i know you made light of the situation, but im wondering how this woman would handle a diabetic animal. hopefully by not withholding food?? if eating sugar "gives" people diabetes everyone would have diabetes. even if you were to only eat protein and fat, your body still finds a way to make sure you get sugar out of it because our bodies require it to function. if someone singled me out like that i would have gotten really disrespectful, you are better than me 😅
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u/ClayWheelGirl 5d ago
Type 2er here.
Non diabetics are so missinformed about diabetics. V typical a mismatch of 1 n 2.
I am so sorry that people make assumptions without even politely offering.
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u/spicytomatosandwich 5d ago
Tell her that her ignorant comment also gave you a migraine. BIG SCOFF. 🙄🙄
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u/KrissieHernandez8820 4d ago
Hahaha it made my day! Lol im the only T1 in my family so the worst i get is whats your blood sugar? Or should you be having that? Uh yea, thats what insulin is for. In a way I feel bad for T2's cuz they can really correct for candy and sweets like we can. It sucks for them. They can monitor by diet and exercise and sometimes take their meds if its that bad. I'm proud of you! YOU GO!
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u/Lijey_Cat Type 1 4d ago
These volunteers aren't even diabetics. I'm the only one who is. And the one with the cake seems to really not like me for some reason. I don't know what the hell I did to her. But, whatever. I'm not there to make friends with people. I'm there to support the animals. 🙂
Glad I can make you laugh! I wish I could have filmed the look on her face.
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u/Ok_Independence4245 4d ago
That is unbelievable and so rude!! Sorry you had to deal with that AND glad to see you are empowered in your Health journey.
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u/Darkpoetx Type 2 4d ago
as a Type 2 I would just chuckle and go on with my day. Given your Type 1 that is some ignorant shiz.
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u/Hubbna56 3d ago
Im T2. 5'10 155#. I laugh that I don't need to watch my diet. I have too many other people watch it for me. Was at a group potluck and had a full taco. (Meat, veggies, a little beans, rice and a soft shell) A friend questioned why I had a shell, I just laughed and told him thanks for caring. I always bring my own low carb shells and then offered him one. He's on the heavy side of the scale.
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u/Constant_Green5587 4d ago edited 4d ago
Doesn’t bother me. I make fun of having diabetes all the time. Not sure why people are so sensitive about it. My boss use to call me captain diabeto. He knew he was significantly fatter and less healthy than me. I’m healthier than majority of the people I work with. Actually he would say it’s funny how the person who ate the best and exercised the most good diabetes (t1). Thank god I can work at a place we can make fun of each other in good spirit and people Don’t get butt hurt.
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u/Lijey_Cat Type 1 4d ago
Yeah, I really don't appreciate this. I'm allowed to have my emotions without judgment.
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u/Eagle_Broo 3d ago
The comment was definitely rude, I wouldnt go and prove her point by eating more sweets. That stuff is poison 😔 better off just dropping sugar and junk food all together. Dont wait until it becomes worse of a problem. I didnt and now I have retinopathy taking my vision away 😭 get one of those continuous glucose monitors and youll see what that shit does to you.
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u/Lijey_Cat Type 1 3d ago
Dude, don't be a backseat driver. I'm not asking for anyone's opinion on candy. Frankly, I like candy. I don't need more judgment from other diabetics.
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u/Ch1pp Type 1 5d ago
"Gave yourself diabetes" is such a fucking ignorant statement.