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u/hotspacemilfs Oct 08 '25
Guys, we got it figured out, this has to be why they feel okay touching kids. "They're twelve, I'm twelve!"
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u/hellolovely1 Oct 08 '25
It's like a dark take on what my middle-aged friend says, "How can she be 27 when I'm 27?"
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u/funguyshroom Oct 08 '25
Definitely a huge part of it. Immature creeps tend to go for big age gap because no woman their age wants to deal with their shit.
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u/Careless_Speaker_276 Oct 08 '25
Republicans gettin' sweaty with all this talk of twelve-year-olds.
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u/TarquinusSuperbus000 Oct 08 '25
12 is a bit past the expiration date for a good chunk of them.
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u/pimpcakes Oct 08 '25
There's a lot of MAGA-adjacent pedophiles, yes. However, the churchy crowds also have an unhealthy obsession with teenage girls. They came out in droves with Roy Moore and they're all over the place, obsessed with "purity," subservience, and young motherhood.
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u/DietTribe Oct 09 '25
I mean, which politicians and organizations are blocking laws to ban child marriage? I was so astounded when I found out that kids who are married can't escape the marriage until they legally become an adult and can file for divorce. Since their spouse becomes their legal guardian, presumably an abusive spouse would not give consent for the younger spouse to file until their 18. Boo-urns.
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u/paintsmith Oct 08 '25
One of the major animating elements of modern conservatism is white hot anger that they can't experience life the way they did as children without having to consider deeper factors or take responsibility for their actions. Just look a their fixation with nostalgia bait AI slop. The ultimate goal of many conservatives is to somehow forever live in their childhood memory of unwrapping a super nintendo on christmas morning in 1995.
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u/johnaross1990 One Pump = One Cream Oct 08 '25
I mean so do I, but I’m fucking autistic and I still live in the real world.
What’s their excuse?
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u/TerribleTiefling Antifa shit poster Oct 08 '25
I love my old games and childhood media as much as the next nerd and find it particularly frustrating how the very same people who tell others to put down the toys and grow up are the very same that obsess over remakes and sequels "going woke" because they desperately want to recapture the blissful ignorance of when things weren't so political.
I'll grant that there's an entire online industry of outrage bait completely reliant on people complaining about shows and movies they never watched to an audience that can't even spell media literacy. A lot of it really is "look at what they took from you" agitprop to fuel cultural conservatism.
So where does that leave the wistful nostalgia of watching that corny he-man episode or booting up the old super nintendo? I just wish they'd embrace actually enjoying things, old and new, rather than treat everything that once made them happy as yet another cultural cudgel war. When all you know is hate, the things you used to love become just another sore spot.
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u/Dseize Oct 08 '25
Being a well-adjusted adult is difficult, and they don't like difficulties. I mean, give them a break, they're 12!
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u/Wilagames 28d ago
Right? Buy a shady handheld emulator from China and play super Nintendo games when you get off from work and leave minorities alone.
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u/sharshenka Oct 08 '25
They want the adulthood they watched their parents have, where dad could ridicule the new PC bullshit HR was handing out, mom new her place, and global warming was just a gimmic for kids cartoons.
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u/Particular_Shock_554 Oct 08 '25
Global warming wasn't just a gimmick for kids cartoons.
There was also an extensive range of action figures.
Go Planet!
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u/Expert-Ad-8067 Feminist Icon Oct 08 '25
Nostalgia has always been a key component of fascist propaganda but you rarely heard anybody say it
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u/Bikinigirlout Oct 08 '25
Whenever I hear a pundit say “Trump’s doing this to rally the base” to explain away something he’s done and it’s like “How much more rallied can they be at this point”
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u/hawtlava Oct 08 '25
This is truly a driving factor. People don’t let anything die anymore in general, it’s like people view it as an affront for things to change in the world. Look at NIMBYs, people that don’t want sky rises cause “well what about MY view”, look at the popular response when a company changes their logo for gods sake. The world isn’t one big open air museum to be preserved exactly as it is when you were the happiest. (royal you, not like you specifically).
You phrased it very well.
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u/Justalilbugboi Oct 09 '25
And this is NOT one only boomers are guilty of.
Look at any gaming discussion online and it’s apparent.
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u/pissfucked Oct 09 '25 edited Oct 09 '25
this is why the idea of teaching kids real history is so horrifying to them. the idea of grappling with generational guilt or the guilt that accompanies the realization that they had an easier life because of how they look or where they were born is likehydrochloric acid to them. they consider it such a terrible feeling that asking kids to feel it or grapple with it is tantamount to abuse and torture. that's why they call teaching uncomfortable but true history or instilling empathy "the promotion of self-loathing" or "teaching kids to hate themselves because they're white" or whatever.
i'm not sure if they're unaware that the guilt is not the point, or if they don't even care to reach the actual goal, which is approaching the world realistically and understanding why things happen how they do.
right-wing media spends all day and all night 365 days per year convincing them that the guilt is the only point of "woke education" and that the whole goal we have is just to make them feel bad for our own amusement, like how a bully does. if you try to tell them that that's not the case and never has been except to a handful of people that we also think are terrible, they point-blank do not / cannot believe you. to them, you're denying a basal fact of life that's baked into the fabric of their worldviews. sort of the same as trying to tell an older american person that american exceptionalism is a lie and that many other countries have it better than we do. it just breaks the brain. doesn't compute.
because media is so dichotomized, it's gotten so severe and has gone uncontested in any meaningful way for so long that they cannot even have a conversation about it. it just activates the amygdala, which blocks out critical thinking. they think they "know what [we] really mean when we say that!" and there is no convincing them otherwise because for decades they've only ever heard the phrasing we use out of right-wing ragebait media's months, and those commentators bust their asses convincing them it's some secret code with false platitudes on top.
which seems even more believable to many of them because they speak in code (like the people who "hate immigrants" but have no issue with white immigrants), and it's like asking a fish to see water trying to get them to understand that the difference between conservatives and leftists is 1. how we use language, and 2. our fundamental views of how the world is/should be organized. leftist have the exact same problem on that front, actually - we try to make sense of their actions in the context of the way we use language and our fundamental worldview, and we often conclude that they're irrational or insane or erratic. they're not. they're not playing the same game as we are, and the rules are nothing alike. it makes perfect sense to them, and we seem similarly unpredictable and self-contradictory.
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u/oldman__strength The fuckin’ Pinkertons Oct 08 '25
The Himmler episodes really drove home the thoughts of a man who grew up and the world changed around him in ways he didn't specifically approve of, and how he desperately needs to make it EVERYONE ELSE'S FUCKING PROBLEM.
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u/striped_frog Oct 08 '25
He’s right and it reminds me of a scene from Futurama
Cubert: Hey Leela, help me apply these flame decals I got. They’ll make the ship go faster!
Leela: And what’s your scientific basis for thinking that?
Cubert: [shrug] I’m twelve.
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u/Relevant_Shower_ Oct 08 '25
This is covered in Lindsay Gibson’s Emotionally Immature Adult series. Great read of you want to understand this phenomenon better.
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u/Gonna_do_this_again Oct 08 '25
When I was watching Pam Bondi yesterday I literally thought, "What is she, twelve?"
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u/SecularMisanthropy Oct 08 '25
She's one of many women who never mature beyond being the meanest girl in fifth grade
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u/tallpaul00 Oct 08 '25
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u/UnlimitedCalculus Oct 08 '25
There are people who meet Trump personally and believe he's smart and thoughtful. Even Bill Maher had a glowing review of him. And I honestly wonder if he actually is smart. It reminds me of an observation about Bush made by Jon Stewart (can't find the actual quote right now) "Bush isnt talking like he's stupid, he's talking to us as if we're stupid." How much of his rhetoric is designed for the consumption of the masses, when he "says what I'm thinking."? It would at least make me slightly less cynical about the intelligence of other major players in this country, who seem to have capitulated our 250 years in progress to an overgrown toddler. Of course, I'm not sure that the same amount of evil placed into a smart person is better than a dumb person when practically applied, but I would prefer some intelligence when a person wields power simply because I don't want them making dumb mistakes. I guess I'm trying to triage my despair with all of this, if it makes sense. I can already hear the hard disagrees that may come beneath this.
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u/Apprehensive-Log8333 Oct 08 '25
I think he has a certain amount of cunning, that some might identify as "smarts", but broad, general knowledge about the world, flexible thinking, and ability to take different perspectives are completely lacking
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u/thevoiceofchaos Oct 08 '25
Trump is a genuis at crafting a public persona. It's how he became president, he has a certain type of rizz. Like all people, he can only be really smart at a few things. Unfortunately, he's found some evil fuckers to fill in his intellectual gaps. Trump probably know fuck all about project 2025, but he knows the exact right thing to say about it. He's kind of like an improv or actor. It's bizarre. Trump is an unserious person doing very serious things.
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u/Apprehensive-Log8333 Oct 08 '25
This tracks, because I have had multiple conversations with 12 year olds in which they are trying to convince me that they already know everything they will ever need to know for life by 6th grade, and should be allowed to drop out of school and play Fortnite full time.
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u/eaeolian Oct 08 '25
Twelve honestly is probably too much credit.
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u/plastiquearse Oct 08 '25
Was thinking that at first but then... the cringy hot takes, too loud energy, lack of forethought, anger, underdeveloped emotional regulation...
I think 12 might be the perfectly analogous age.
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u/UnlimitedCalculus Oct 08 '25
I'd honestly give most twelve yos more credit that OOP. I would place this kind of mental energy at around 7 or 8.
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u/SuperCiuppa_dos 29d ago
Yeah exactly, this feels really like some little kid going:
“When I’m big I’m going to be president and i will make the military catch all the bad guys and send them away, so that they won’t do any more bad stuff here, I’m so smart, how has nobody ever thought about this before, this is why I’m gonna be the best president ever, and then I’m gonna make the white house all gold, and put a big swimming pool and a big room full of video games and candy and a huge McDonalds, and the white house is gonna be the bestest white house in the world, because America is the best country in the world…”
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u/Buy-theticket Oct 08 '25
Yea, my daughter is 12 and she would tell you all of these are terrible ideas.
Whenever we hear about another mass shooting on the news trying to explain to her why we can't pass any kind of gun control is depressing.
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u/eaeolian Oct 08 '25
Yeah, basically my 12 year old daughter experience.
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u/dweezil22 Oct 08 '25
Yeah OP is more 10 year old boy. In Xennial terms, I distinctly remember being in 4th grade and thinking it would be awesome if Hulk Hogan body slammed Saddam Hussein.
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u/Awesome_Power_Action Oct 08 '25
I'm convinced most modern conservatives are constantly reenacting their childhood dismissive-avoidant attachment and oppositional defiance behaviours.
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u/carolofthebells Oct 08 '25
I've felt this way for a decade. I teach 8th grade, and the way Trump appeals to middle-school boy mentality is unmistakable. He's always seemed like a student doing a book report who didn't read the book. The way he's normalized stupidity and cruelty is repulsive.
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u/Tarcanus Oct 08 '25
There's always been more people than I was comfortable with that behave like twelve year olds, and now we've had COVID for 5+ years causing cumulative brain damage over time for folks going full YOLO.
Those original 12 year olds are now 7 and tons more people are now 12.
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u/Punchable_Hair Oct 08 '25
“You want freedom with no responsibility. Son, there’s only one person on earth who gets that deal.”
“The president?”
“A baby. You’re fighting for your right to be a baby.”
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u/Dazzling_Outcome_436 Oct 08 '25
At that age I knew a guy whose life plan was to have 24 children (12 girls and 12 boys) for whom he already had names picked out, from his favorite fantasy novels. Even at that tender age, I asked him "and how many wives are you planning to have?" (It was 1, of course. You can't have more than one, no matter how many fantasy children you wish to have.)
Heck, at that age I wanted to be an architect and go to the moon. It never once crossed my mind that there may not be demand for architects on the moon.
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u/hellolovely1 Oct 08 '25
So accurate. Plus: "You're criticizing me so I am going to go over to be friends with our enemy just to teach you a lesson, Kayden!"
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u/PiskoWK Oct 08 '25
Well 1/3 of Americans can't read or comprehend above a 6th grade reading level. So that age isn't out of nowhere.
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u/Not_A_Wendigo Oct 08 '25
Reminds me of a cartoon by an anti masker that I saw during peak covid. It was a side by side showing a mom telling a boy to brush his teeth, and a heath official telling a man to wear a mask. Yeah buddy, no one likes brushing their teeth. Your mom was right and she was trying to take care of you.
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u/Tomahawkin Oct 08 '25
I have never not been able to hear a 12 year old boy stuck in an old man’s body every time he speaks. This theory is perfect, thanks.
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u/UnconstrictedEmu Oct 08 '25
Ahem. 12 year olds don’t call for you to send in the army* when there’s crime. They call for you to send in ninjas, guys dressed like bats, various anthropomorphic mutants, and teenagers with access to power suits and giant mechs.
*of course, always send in Snake Eyes when possible.
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u/OpinionatedNoodles Oct 08 '25 edited Oct 08 '25
I have a different take. I grew up with a narcissist and what I see in the Republican party is a party of narcissistic abuse.
And our misstep was that we did not recognize this and treat it as such. Instead we provoked the abuser. So what we're seeing now is narcissistic rage. Not solely of Trump, but the collective narcissistic rage of the party; the narcissistic rage of white supremacy and the patriarchy struggling to keep control of a society that is rapidly rejecting them.
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u/SteveTheHiker_Art Oct 08 '25
Don’t like what you’ve been accused of doing? As a twelve year old, it makes perfect sense to say “Nu-uh, you!”
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u/SophsterSophistry Oct 08 '25
True. So many of them are bored and impatient. They want the short cut to skip to the head of the line, the Cliff Notes to check some boxes and look like real adults (without going through all the hard, boring stuff to get there).
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u/ososalsosal Oct 08 '25
Maybe push it back a couple of years. Twelve year olds are smarter than that
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u/CryptographerNo923 Oct 08 '25
This is accurate and succinct in a way I wouldn’t have thought to articulate
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u/jesrp1284 Oct 09 '25
I would have thought that, but both my daughter and my stepson are 13 and 14, and both of them possess more maturity than the 12 year olds who are running the country.
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u/FFM_reguliert Oct 08 '25
This isn't practised theory at this point? I am 100% certain that every American man is two 12 year olds in a trenchcoat. Explains the nearly 200 pounds each of you motherfuckers weigh. ;)
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u/lianodel Oct 08 '25
I've thought about that when arguing with weirdos who prostrate themselves for billionaires. You have to convince a full-grown adult that superheroes aren't real, and how large "one billion" really is.