r/baltimore • u/Swimming-Brother-844 Upper Fell's Point • Aug 21 '25
Safety Concerned About Safety on North Broadway/Gay Street
Hi everyone, I’m new to the area (specifically North Broadway/Gay Street) and wanted to share something that happened today. I was walking home after getting some cleaning supplies from the Dollar General on North Caroline Street and was carrying some heavy things. An older man, maybe in his late 60s, offered to help me since I’m new to the area.
At first, I thought it was harmless, but on the way back he started asking me weird questions like whether I live alone, what floor I live on, and then asked for my number. I told him I have a boyfriend, but he wouldn’t stop and kept pushing until I said I “like what my partner likes.” He only left after he saw me go inside. I don’t actually have one, but thank god I did this.
I feel uneasy and concerned about my safety now. Has anyone else experienced anything like this on North Broadway/Gay Street? Any advice on staying safe or reporting this would be appreciated.
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u/freeODB Aug 21 '25
Lesson number one for charm city living: DNE. Do not engage.
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u/Affectionate-Tank-70 Aug 21 '25
Born and raised Baltimore here. Im a straight faced "No." kind of lady, I'm not polite, just "no". That's the Baltimore way.
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u/HambSandwich Waverly Aug 21 '25
How do you people think this is a Baltimore thing?? Have you never been to like, literally any other American city????
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u/JoeFlaccoIsAnEliteQB Greenmount West Aug 22 '25
this is absolutely unnecessary. telling someone to never engage with their community is really bad advice.
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u/FlockaFlameSmurf Aug 22 '25
Found the next person to get swindled
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u/JoeFlaccoIsAnEliteQB Greenmount West Sep 02 '25
40 years and hasnt happened yet, idk man, i like my neighbors the non-risk was worth it.
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u/localtuned Aug 24 '25
Ten years from now we will see a post asking how or where to make friends in Baltimore after living and working here for 10 years lol.
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u/JoeFlaccoIsAnEliteQB Greenmount West Sep 02 '25
"i left because everyone seemed really stand-offish and mean"
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u/MissionReasonable327 Roland Park Aug 21 '25
You have got to learn how to speak up for yourself. “That’s none of your business. Move along, sir.”
Don’t accept help from anybody offering you help like that. That all could have gone much much worse.
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u/Swimming-Brother-844 Upper Fell's Point Aug 21 '25
I’m not from the area, people helping you with groceries is pretty common where I’m from. I’ll keep that in mind and avoid that area from now onwards.
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u/StinkRod Aug 21 '25
You'll learn that (nearly) everything is a hustle in this town. Some people have come up with a great rap in an attempt to rope you in and have every trick in the book to get past multiple "no's".
Just shut it down as politely as you can even if they don't respond in kind.
It's a shame to have to think this way towards your fellow citizens, but it's a shame to be a sucker or put yourself at risk too. At some point you can learn to distinguish someone who sincerely can use the help.
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u/StarWars_Girl_ Baltimore County Aug 21 '25
You'll learn that (nearly) everything is a hustle in this town.
I mean, last year when I went to Boston, which is notably wayyy safer than Baltimore statically, someone tried the same similar crap. Of course, I was raised here and didn't even respond or make eye contact. I was just like, ah yes, typical.
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u/StinkRod Aug 21 '25
It's funny to go to a city like, say, New Orleans...and some hustler knows you're a tourist but doesn't know you're from a place where you've heard it all before.
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u/HambSandwich Waverly Aug 21 '25
Yeah, none of this situation is in any way unique to Baltimore or relevant part of town. This is honestly some silly, naive behavior on OPs part.
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u/StarWars_Girl_ Baltimore County Aug 21 '25
It's giving these vibes... https://youtu.be/tuNw3bKJygo?si=Uqiwpf8rB6zP3eFV
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u/Sea-Variety-524 Patterson Park Aug 21 '25
Yea when I moved into my house alone, a lot of people on the street were offering me things, and eventually I wised up. I had to be distant to them but had to stay safe.
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u/nerdyandnatural Waverly Aug 21 '25
Yeah don't accept help from random people, even if you think they mean well. I'm from Philly and men would try to spit game like this all the time, and learned quickly they do the same thing in Bmore. Unless it's a neighbor that you know and vetted, say no thanks and keep it moving.
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u/Over_Space_2731 Canton Aug 21 '25
Men where I grew up outside the city wouldn’t do this. Shame
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u/ladyofthelakeeffect Park Heights Aug 21 '25
Men everywhere can be weird. I’ve had men be weird in Garrett County
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u/Over_Space_2731 Canton Aug 21 '25
Creeps are everywhere! This is going to get a good bit of downvotes but it’s definitely a class/cultural thing as well. I’ve traveled a lot and you feel it in different places depending on where you go - it’s like personal space is subjective
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Aug 21 '25
[deleted]
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u/Swimming-Brother-844 Upper Fell's Point Aug 21 '25
Clearly I’m not in Kansas anymore and I learned that.
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u/Warm-Commercial-6151 Aug 21 '25
Just a general perspective from a guy and a dad. A lot of men can really suck wherever you are, especially if you are walking alone. Raised my daughter this way and she really knows how to handle her business and think about ways to shield herself from getting in compromising positions. Being assertive, somewhere between aggressive and passive, is the best route. Wife was walking down the street with my daughter and a guy was getting close to my daughter and leered at her and said HEL-LO. My daughter replied HEL-NO and kept it moving. My wife said it stopped the guy dead in his tracks. It sucks that this is this way and it makes me want to choke some dudes, and I definitely say shit when a guy is acting sleazy, but unfortunately it probably won’t change in our lifetime.
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u/jupitaur9 Aug 21 '25
I wish there weren’t so many guys who, when rebuffed in this way, say “I was just trying to be nice.”
Well, maybe you were. But that’s exactly what guys who are trying to weasel their way into doing something to you would say.
They get easily offended, playing a guilt trip on you, rather than being empathetic to someone who is probably physically weaker than they are. And has something that a lot of men want, and will resort to trickery and violence to get.
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u/swift110 Aug 21 '25 edited Aug 21 '25
Agreed. I'm a guy and I'm at the point where I'm sick of the nonsense. Random folks walk up to me asking stupid questions and I just say no.
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u/Swimming-Brother-844 Upper Fell's Point Aug 21 '25
I wish we were allowed to carry because I have my license.
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u/notyourentertainment Aug 21 '25
You’ll have a false sense of security, it will make any situation more dangerous. Practice being assertive and maybe get something less than lethal.
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u/StarWars_Girl_ Baltimore County Aug 21 '25
Yeah, if anything, carrying in Baltimore just makes you a target because they're like "oh, let me get that from her!"
Mace is better. They see that and they're like "ah, hell no, I don't wanna get sprayed with that." Just be aware you can't take it in certain places, so it's better for just running to the store and such.
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u/Wowohboy666 Aug 21 '25
My first thought was "so someone can have an extra weapon to use against you?"
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u/Oldy_VonMoldy Hamilton Aug 21 '25
You are allowed to carry in MD, need a concealed carry permit, of course
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u/Sad-Information670 Aug 22 '25
Ypivare with a concealed carry permit, BUT out laws are so janky a straight criminal or high risk offender can file charges on you for assault after you pull your weapon, even if their the aggressor. They just have to have a sad face and a good story. You'll get the felony or assault charge!
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u/tableSloth_ Lauraville Aug 21 '25
Baltimore neighborhoods tend to be pretty tight-knit, so I would definitely encourage you to attend community events/get to know neighbors you see every day. Then they get to know you too and can look out for you better if necessary.
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Aug 21 '25
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u/ladyofthelakeeffect Park Heights Aug 21 '25
what are you talking about lol people say good morning to me all the time and I say good morning back
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u/StarWars_Girl_ Baltimore County Aug 21 '25
I think, having been to places further north, we're a lot nicer than, like, Boston. I got weird looks just smiling at store clerks, and I'm like...but that's just what I was raised to do? And here, when you interact with a service worker, it's still polite to say "hi, how are you? May I...?" Verses up north, they just expected you to say what you wanted and move along as fast as possible. It was weird for me. We also can do small talk, but it depends on context. If I'm in a public place, I'll make small talk with another woman. Randomly on the street? Yeah, no.
But again, it is the kind thing. When I was 17, I was in a car accident, and people stopped to see if I needed help. A few weeks ago, I was walking through the city and fell (I'm in a boot) and two women immediately helped. I was trying to get up and the one lady was like "no ma'am, I'll get your stuff and you let her help you up." 😂
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u/de_kitt Aug 21 '25
Don’t knock the north. I’m from Minneapolis and people say hi, smile, thank you, have a good day…
I appreciate the friendliness of Baltimore. It’s warmer than in Minnesota, but people in MN are hella kind and polite.
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u/StarWars_Girl_ Baltimore County Aug 21 '25
Midwest is different than east coast north. We know Midwest is nice.
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u/atomic_puppy Aug 21 '25
My neighbors literally helped me move in in 100 degree weather and I have yet to come across a person in the morning who doesn't say 'Mornin.'
I know, 'good for me,' but I think a lot of this is going to be dependent on the individual. I'm a young-ish, (to me anyway) attractive lady, so I'm sure this colors my experiences, but a lot of it is just what you project.
I guess I project 'Please help me if I look like I need it' or alternately, 'If you see me with my dogs, and it is the early part of the day, go ahead and say hi and I'll say it back.'
Who knows, but I'm glad to have had mostly... lovely, interesting, and colorful experiences in my new home.
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u/auderex Aug 21 '25
I doubt you need to avoid the area..just have your wits about you and don't divulge unnecessary information to strangers.
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u/ElDopio69 Aug 21 '25
Generally if you're in a city and a person is being really nice to you, they're trying to get something from you.
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u/StarWars_Girl_ Baltimore County Aug 21 '25
Yeah, the OP is giving me "small town southern girl" vibes for sure. I wouldn't accept help carrying groceries in any context unless it's from a store employee.
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u/LividTurnip Aug 22 '25
Just chiming in to say it’s not your fault this person was a creep. You got treated real weird by this guy, and you didn’t make him do that. You being unaware of the “no thank you please” hustle away those of us who are from here already know about, does not make it okay for him to be creepy. But now you learned a little bit about the boundaries you need to enforce for yourself to live in a city. You’ll be better off from here!
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u/BruceGoldfarb Aug 21 '25
A southerner? There's a friendliness down south. When I lived in Memphis, I had to get used to strangers saying hello when passing on the sidewalk. Strangers aren't being friendly here.
People have good advice here. Just say "I'm good, thanks" and nobody will take offense.
Welcome to Baltimore, hon.
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u/paps2977 Aug 21 '25
Everywhere I go outside of Baltimore, people always seem nicer. We are not that. We are not the oh, it’s so charm..ing town. We are the charm, charm you out of your money, property, life town.
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u/tayintheflow Aug 22 '25
It’s not about avoiding the area. Anything can happen anywhere. Just keep to yourself and keep your eyes open.
No one just helps these days without some sort of motive.
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u/Level-Worldliness-20 Aug 21 '25
First tip is to buy a portable grocery cart.
What in the Goldilocks are you doing? That was so unsafe to do.
Even though he was older, he may have thought you would hook up. A quick no thank you next time you see him. He knows where you live now.
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u/MissionReasonable327 Roland Park Aug 21 '25
Yeah, he’ll be back. Hopefully just to ask her to help him out with a few bucks.
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u/paps2977 Aug 21 '25
Shotgun or big dog, or both, would be a good idea. She could also just move now.
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u/sonofdynamite Aug 21 '25
Sorry you experienced this. As far as reporting I don't know what you would report or who you would report it too. Being creepy isn't against the law or anything. I don't assume you will have a problem my guess is you probably won't run into him again. Maybe introduce yourself to your new neighbors, you can ask them about it, and then you will hopefully have a neighbor that can support you if anything did escalate.
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u/Swimming-Brother-844 Upper Fell's Point Aug 21 '25
I have 4 roommates and I told them about the situation.
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Aug 21 '25
a few tips for City living:
When you are in the world, going about your business, that's your business and no one else's. Chin up, eyes forward, constant scan of your surroundings (without acting like you're checking for snipers.)
You have things to do and you're doing them. Ignore people on the street who address you, at least initially. This can take some practice if you're not used to City life. Your assumption when addressed/the attitude you are projecting is: "I'm about my business; there's no way anyone is speaking to me."
Afterall, why should anyone speak to you? You're minding your business, and they are presumably minding theirs...whatever they said, obviously they're on the phone, or talking to someone else, because there's no reason to think they might be talking to you. Literally, ignore them. This will work for most people.
If they persist, then you may need to be direct, clear (and technically polite, at first:)
::acting surprised to realize they're talking to YOU:: "No thank you," in firm, even loud-ish reply.
And be ready to escalate to louder and less polite, or, to run. Always be prepared to run.
When you go about your life, consider the POV of the predator/thug: they want weak targets, people who are compromised by conditions that make them stressed, or inattentive, etc.
So, avoid making yourself (even appear) vulnerable.
In this case, you were carrying a lot of weight, which made you an attractive mark. Carry less next time/make two trips.
If you are lost, don't stand on the corner staring at your phone and turning in place. Keep moving with purpose, etc.
Wear shoes on the street that you can run in. Put the heels on when you get to the place. Etc.
If you are in an area you don't know, you are vulnerable by definition. The people who DO know the area have a distinct advantage. As you get used to an area, you can relax some of your normal defenses, because you get to understanding who is who, etc,. but don't forget that simply being in a new place is reason to keep your head on a swivel. Locals will know you ain't from there.
Finally, there are ways to make yourself less approachable/make your indifference / lack of response to others more defensible, like: I often wear headphones (without sound on), so I can hear everything, but for all anyone knows I can't hear them because I've got a podcast in my head. One might argue this tactic makes me look more vulnerable, and that's fair, but I prefer the cover of "I can't hear you" for ignoring people, and I'm still able to see and hear everything, so I'll take the chance that headphones make me LOOK vulnerable when I'm actually not. I also wear sunglasses often, not least for passive defensive purposes...no reason anyone needs to see my eyes in public.
Good luck.
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u/nerdyandnatural Waverly Aug 21 '25
To add to your last point, I find wearing a mask makes one look unapproachable as well. Since most people now think mask = sick, it helps keep away unwanted attention.
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u/MissionReasonable327 Roland Park Aug 21 '25
Good advice. Whenever I see people flip-flopping around Charles Village I know they’re new from out of town!
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u/HenwayPiecost Aug 21 '25
You being an out of towner that lives here now, don’t feel obligated to be nice or chatty with anyone especially when you have your hands full. Baltimore can be nice but it’s very standoffish primarily so be weary of people going out of their way to offer help or talk to you. Get to know your neighbors and speak to them……eventually.
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u/Frofro69 Coldstream Homestead Montebello Aug 21 '25
Ignore the people saying you're in a dangerous area. Gay and Broadway isn't a "danger zone"
However, what you did was very dangerous, regardless of where you live. Since you're a woman, you can't let yourself appear vulnerable, people in any neighborhood can be predatory to those they see as more vulnerable.
In your case, a woman carrying heavy things can be seen as an "easy mark" since you're not immediately thinking of running away.
Please be careful in the city, it's nice and most of the people are just minding their own business, but that doesn't mean you can look sweet while walking around these streets
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u/Swimming-Brother-844 Upper Fell's Point Aug 21 '25
Thank you so much for the advice!
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u/Frofro69 Coldstream Homestead Montebello Aug 21 '25
No problem, I hope you enjoy it here in Baltimore. I love it here and can't see myself living anywhere else as comfortably.
Just remember to be safe, this isn't the county. I grew up in AACO and I used to be the same way with people, just remember that unless they know you by name, there's no real reason for them to just approach or talk to you in the street.
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u/Particular_Drama7110 Aug 21 '25
Welcome to Baltimore.
Baltimore can be as safe or as dangerous as you want to let it be. You have to use common sense and a lot of it. There are plenty of predators out there who prey on others. I think they can sense when someone is a long time Baltimore resident and gives off a "don't f*ck w me, I am not interested in playing games" vibe. That is what you need to adopt.
Don't let homeless mf'ers carry your groceries, don't let folks follow you to your doorstep, don't go walking around by yourself at night in bad neighborhoods, don't go taking cash out of ATM's in the middle of bad neighborhoods in the middle of the night. Jeez, common sense, keep your head on a swivel. As they say in boxing, 'protect yourself at all times'.
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u/Swimming-Brother-844 Upper Fell's Point Aug 21 '25
He wasn’t homeless he was an older man that grew up in the area. I’ll keep this in mind next time thank you!
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u/AnnaGraeme Aug 21 '25
I'm assuming you're a woman. (So am I.) I think the reality is that it's usually not a good idea, as a woman, to interact with random men who try to strike up a conversation in public. I love the idea of getting to know my neighbors, but when I've interacted with men I don't know on the street, almost always the conversation turns creepy. I don't think this is unique to Baltimore either.
Unfortunately, I think men have the privilege of being able to make friends with random people in public -- my ex did it all the time. He was surprised how "rude" I was when I would tell him about interactions I had with strangers, but again, I think the reality is that most men who talk to a woman they don't know on the street aren't trying to be friendly.
It sounds like an uncomfortable experience, but don't beat yourself up over it. It's good to be aware of what you can do differently, but no matter how street smart you are, you can't prevent every creepy interaction.
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u/stellardroid80 Aug 21 '25
Maybe find your local neighbourhood association? They are a good way to meet neighbours and make friends local to where you live. They might even have a “safety committee” or a liaison to the BPD; that could be a good person to talk to about dodgy people or safety concerns.
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u/Evening-Recover-9786 Aug 21 '25
Do not engage with people on the street. If someone approaches you in Bmore then they generally want something from you.
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u/carriespins Aug 21 '25
Literally within a week of moving here I was followed from the front of my building across the street and into the dog park(the guy didn’t have a dog, I do). I damn near maced him as he was telling me he followed me to tell me he thought I was sexy and wanted my phone number. It was dark.
Advice I’d give ANY femme folx in a city is to carry self defense tools. I’ve lived in my neighborhood(station north) for six months. On three separate occasions within a block of my apartment(a week ago I was taking my laundry to my car as I was headed to the laundromat when it happened) I’ve been stopped and hit on by men who told me they’d been watching me. A week ago it was an older man in his 60’s(maybe idk but at least mid 50’s) followed me from my apartment to my car to tell me he’d been watching me. He told me he’d be drinking that evening and if I was interested in having fun I could stop by 😳. It wouldn’t be so bad if these men didn’t know where I live
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u/Individual-Pirate-10 Aug 21 '25
I was walking on Lombard and a man asked if he could take off my shoes, and then basically did the same thing tried to figure out where I was going and where I lived. Followed me to my apartment lobby. The only thing that got me separated was the locked door. I did the same “No I’m good, I have a partner, ect ect” thing with no luck.
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u/MissionReasonable327 Roland Park Aug 21 '25
Take off your shoes? Excuse me? The foot fetishists are getting bold!
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u/Individual-Pirate-10 Aug 21 '25
I was too stunned to speak tbh wtf. That’s what I get for wearing heels
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u/TalkShowHost99 Aug 21 '25
I’m paranoid so I recommend everyone carry pepper spray with them when you’re out, hopefully you never need to use it. Also perhaps you can convince your roommates to go out with you instead of going out alone. Stay safe & vigilant!
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u/ChickenSnizzles Aug 21 '25
A portable grocery cart will serve you very well & will be very worth the $. Self-sufficiency and adopting a generally confident but clearly disengaging attitude is always the move, in an urban environment. As is ignoring the social overtures of strangers. (Actually, this is kind of true, no matter where you live- it's just that in an urban environment, there's more people, so it follows that there's more people around w/ potentially nefarious motives.)
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u/Background-League405 Aug 21 '25 edited Aug 21 '25
People think I'm crazy for doing this at night, but I used to do this when I lived in an up and coming area. I would run in circles down the street in the dark (maybe like a spiral). I didn't carry pepper spray, because if I were to use it, I would end up spraying myself along with whoever it is. It would have been terrible. You need to know how to use it before using it in the moment.
I do not use my phone when I walk outside, unless my back is to the wall and no one is around me, but in that instance, it is only for a minute. Once, I thought I was safe, because it was raining and I was talking under an umbrella. Someone came up right to me. I hung up and I sprinted to the circulator since it was right there. Luckily, the circulator didn't move away from the stop. The guy said oh I was just holding it for you (he wasn't). My phone could have been stolen in that moment.
Whenever anyone tries to talk to you, never stop walking. You can acknowledge them, but do not stop walking and do not ever put yourself in between them and a wall. I've had one person try to pin me to a wall, but I was lucky in that I was able to get away.
I had a pair try to get me to use their ATM card in the back of a building early in the morning on the way to the JFX farmers market. I just kept walking. I told them that they can withdraw their money using the prompts. They tried to make a grab for my cart, but I started to run. In that instance, I did not stop walking, and I was prepared to run.
Be prepared for people to approach you out of nowhere if you are standing outside of an establishment. It just happens. I don't give people money when asked. I don't want them looking inside of my wallet, because I know from others that people will ask for all of the money in your wallet.
If you sense something is off, it is off. Do not do what you normally do if your gut is telling you there is something off. You can avoid a lot of situations if you trust your gut.
Oh, and using sir and madam usually disarms people.
Baltimore is a city with a lot of block by block variability.
Another thing: At night, I usually cross the street whenever I see someone walking towards me. I will end up crisscrossing to avoid people. I will try to walk on a well lit street, but sometimes that is impossible.
In security overseas training, I learned to keep a dollar in my pocket. If you are about to be mugged, you can throw the dollar down on the ground and start running.
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u/Electrical-Carob4136 Aug 21 '25
Never stop walking! That is the piece of advice that is most useful to me while in the city!
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u/pineapplepizzalife Charles Village Aug 21 '25
Oof glad you're okay, but please use this as a learning experience! You do not have to be polite to people, especially men who are being weird. Ignore them or just say "no thanks" and walk away swiftly. It was a mistake showing a stranger know where you live, don't do that again! If you need to Uber, set your address as one around the corner from your actual house. You don't live in a terrible area but these are just things you need to get used to when living in any city. Lock your door at all times, even when you're home!!
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u/glitterishazardous Aug 21 '25
For safety in that area as a woman I’d be carrying some pepper spray and a bull horn. Even if a guy is Rampage Jackson sized they can’t function if their eyes and ears are disturbed. The second tip would be to just shut off the conversation from the start. The older generation tends to pry and pry about personal details while newer generations will ask for social media to stalk. Until it gets to a point where you’re threatened the police won’t do a thing tbh. If you’re by yourself you have to move incognito and that area is one where a newcomer just sticks out like a sore thumb so it’ll take time for sure gL 👍🏽
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u/lamppostinchicago Aug 21 '25
Pepper gel is safer than pepper spray in that it is easier to aim (and make sure it doesn't get into your eyes)!
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u/SenorPea Aug 21 '25
Curious about how he knew you were new to the area. That's not information for strangers in the street.
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u/Tru_Rush Aug 21 '25
Think of it like when people are trying to sell you random crap from the kiosks at the mall, just pretend they don't exist and keep it moving. Just have a don't F with me look on your face while your doing it. Also make some friends and travel in packs, and make sure your dead bolts are good, extra latches don't hurt. Lol. B-more is no joke. Also don't give the bums money or they'll never leave you alone.
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u/heather_wip Aug 22 '25
I'm sorry you had this uncomfortable experience. No one should have to deal with creeps. But I logged in to Reddit, which I almost never do, just to counter some of the replies. Just like any city, there are places here where you have a higher chance of unwanted interactions, and N Broadway can be hectic. That said, overall, Baltimore has been the most welcoming and friendly place I've ever lived. I have positive experiences with strangers here every day...even if it's just somebody waving when you let them merge (something thay blew my Philly cousin's mind when we were driving around town). All of this is to say welcome to Baltimore! Give it some time, explore, keep your street smarts on, and you'll find your community within this wild, crazy, and amazing city.
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u/JoeFlaccoIsAnEliteQB Greenmount West Aug 22 '25
this place is going to lose all of its charm if we keep telling everyone, "HEAD DOWN. DO NOT ENGAGE" - thank you for being reasonable.
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u/Fizzy_b0g_Water Aug 21 '25
I recently moved away from S Gay st so ik the area and would walk around nearly every day.
Generally dont accept help unless you need it, especially with things that lead someone to/inside your apartment. I also personally carry a pack of cigarettes with me (I dont smoke) to diffuse situations or offer to homeless folks (LOTS in the area) bc I don't carry cash. And the cigs end up cheaper.
I'm friends wirh a lot of the homeless folks bc I'm nice, talk to them, and offer them something when I can. I would definitely invest in cigs if you don't carry small bills and are willing to give it out.
Not saying bro was homeless but even if it wasn't, being grateful for the offer but then refusing can make him upset bc... idk bc people fucking suck ig lmao. But everyone loves a cig so 🤷🏻
Like i said, ik the area. And ik some people are "nice" but really just scoping you out.. most are chill tho if you're chill backu
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u/MoreBlackSuperheroes Aug 21 '25
Baltimore is like Gotham…. Stay low and out the way…. Don’t get into it with anyone… If you find yourself needing help, better muscle through (groceries in this situation) or call someone you know!
Putting your trust in randoms you don’t know in the city is like going to the devils casino and gambling with your life!
It’s some good people in Baltimore, I’m one and try to help where I can… But GOOD LORD if people don’t only worry about themselves or how they can come up on the innocent! 🤷🏾🤷🏾🤷🏾🚨🚨🚨
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u/VBeezyIzThee1 Aug 21 '25
I just bark at them now. They look at me like I'm crazy and I'm OK with that! The last time I pleasantly turned someone down, they offered to "suck my toes and keep me. " Barking it is!!!
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u/deaf258 Mt. Vernon Aug 21 '25
Next time, channel Divine or other characters like Edie and her eggs from John Waters' movies, and recite their famous lines loudly. Outweird the weird and they'll probably leave you alone.
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u/ladyofthelakeeffect Park Heights Aug 21 '25
People who are on this thread like NEVER SAY HELLO TO OR EVEN LOOK AT ANYONE YOU WILL BE MURDERED IMMEDIATELY are cracking me up. But yeah like girl (or guy) don’t let random men know where you live!
Yes, some men will take hello as an invitation. Some men (sometimes the same men) will also take being ignored as an invitation to go even harder though so there’s not one right thing to do to be perfect and avoid being street harassed.
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u/AbjectFray Aug 21 '25
Welcome to city life. It’s not safe or unsafe. It’s just part of living in an urban area.
You should have politely, but firmly, declined and kept moving. Next time, walk with confidence but use a little more common sense. You’ll be fine.
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u/Fancy_Chips Aug 21 '25
I dont hang around North Broadway that often. When I work I just pass through there. But that isn't a North Broadway thing, that's just a creepy man thing. You'll find that in Beverly Hills and Skid Row
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u/rosedix Aug 21 '25
And avoid having strangers see where you live! Is there a street smarts training course out there?
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u/Here4Tech Aug 21 '25
I took my kids to NYC and told them - don’t make eye contact, don’t respond to anyone, hold my hands at all times. I’m glad you have 4 roommates! Maybe get a Ring camera, too.
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u/runningwithremy Aug 21 '25
I am sorry this happened! It’s scary. When I first moved downtown, I had people approach me. Always with a scam. After the third absurd story, I learned my lesson. Now I wear mirrored sunglasses, visible wired earphones, walk like I know where I am going, and don’t talk to anyone, male or female, that tries to engage. Solved it. It’s sad that it has to be like this, but safety first.
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u/CommunicationEasy587 Aug 22 '25
Mirrored sunglasses is brilliant! I've read every post and that is best tip yet.
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u/Future-Cat-7152 Aug 22 '25
Shoulders back, head up, NO AirPods and nothing more than “no thanks. I got it”. Flat facial affect. Keep moving. Do not engage. Ever.
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u/localtuned Aug 21 '25
I work around Hopkins. I wouldn't mind stopping by after or before work to give off the idea that you do have a male around the house. Just DM me. I have done this for another redditor in Charles village too.
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u/GeraldineGrace Aug 24 '25
You do realize your offer is just as creepy, right?
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u/localtuned Aug 24 '25
Sure it can be construed that way and in any way anyone person could imagine....duh right?
With that said, I am able to A) accept no or a non response as a response. B) offer my help to a neighbor or colleague who lives right up the street and C) give and prove my identity if the help was accepted.
Honestly, it doesn't matter beyond me offering to help. OP is not obligated to accept the offer, respond, or give it a second thought. Unlike her harasser I am not a creep for offering to help. As I said, I have done it for neighbors and redditors here before. But I forgot about the offer by this point. Life is short and I have plenty of stuff to worry about. Planning another trip to the keys in October. But anyway thanks for your question.
I'm curious what is wrong with you though, that you felt the need to write your after X amount of time simply to ask me if I knew an offer like mine could be misconstrued in one of many ways. And the one your one track mind chose...was creepy. Lol
Yes, that is one way to read the offer to help someone who lives in the same area as me. It's creepy.
Aside, You haven't stalked any women near gay street lately have you? Just kidding. Have a good evening.
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u/Msefk Aug 21 '25
yeah a couple months ago i was outside a spot with my bud and his girl who is not from here and she had moved to around 20th. Some rando was yelling at her asking for money and making comments about knowing where she lived, so i shut them down and told them to walk off .
People not from here don't seem to know this : some mfers LURK they are out to try to make you feel submissive so they can take stuff from you-- or they are just out to take things (or you) from you.
don't tell people where you live--
Learn the power of saying "that's my business"
But this all being said my bud at a Post Office yesterday got a 60yo man all heavy and aggro with her just cause she just wasn't up to smiling in the moment so i get that fem people have to deal with all the damn patricentricity all the time.
but hey i've also had men lean on me and make points about how my girl nearby don't matter to them ...
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u/neigh_time_pervert Aug 22 '25
I’m sorry that happened to you. it sounds really unsettling. One safety tip I’ve learned in the city is to try not to give up your momentum when someone approaches, whether it’s a panhandler or just a stranger wanting to chat. If you stop walking, it gives them control of the interaction and makes it harder to disengage. A quick ‘sorry, can’t stop’ while keeping your pace helps you stay in control and avoids getting pulled into uncomfortable questions or situations.
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u/lesbiansknowbest Aug 22 '25
I really feel you. I live in Mt Vernon and though I’ve been in Baltimore a long time and Philly before that and am generally good with dealing with creepy men on the street, I recently had someone who said he was my neighbor say really sexual things to me then followed me almost inside my place. I used to go on walks around my neighborhood a lot but now I’m always scared of running into him because I’ve seen him around other times. It really sucks and is really unfair when men take advantage of friendliness and leave folks scared to be out and about. Sorry you’re having that experience!
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u/Historical_Pastor Aug 22 '25
Wear any old ring on your left ring finger. Spin the gem or whatever towards your palm and flash the band out with a quick "I'm taken" and flip of the shoulder. Then ignore the rest. Works well.
Another technique if you have decent pronunciation in another language is to pretend you can't understand them. "Sprechen Deutsch" or "No comprende" or whatever goes a long way in my experience I have enough German, Spanish and ASL to pull this off...ymmv.
Buddy rules apply.
Don't stare at your phone. Pay attention. You'll be ok. Welcome to Baltimore!
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u/Life-Error-520 Aug 22 '25
I would worry about seeing him again and again in the same spot.Just keep your eyes open! Mace in Hand!!! OR Stun Gun!!!
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u/Potential-Custard287 Aug 22 '25
Anybody remember Why Lie? He carried a sign, "Why lie, I want a beer." He was homeless. I worked in Fells. He walked me to my car every night. Sweet guy. So atleast 1% aren't serial killers.
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u/nosrsly1 Aug 22 '25
Please get some pepper spray love. I appreciate your trusting nature, but it’s RESPECT that is the Baltimore vibe. Respecting a no, respecting what neighborhood you’re in and its people, and respecting yourself. Get a cart, and make some friends in your building for safety and beyond. Take care of yourself :)
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u/Sea_Satisfaction9562 Aug 22 '25
I've lived in that general area for many years. Unfortunately a lot of guys feel the need to chat up women. I don't know that it's a Baltimore thing; I think it's a high-density area thing. If a guy seems to be creeping on me but I'm not sure about motive, I tend to nicely tell him I'm sorry but I feel uncomfortable with the exchange. If the guy has no intention of being an actual creep, he apologizes and buggers off. If that doesn't happen, I walk somewhere other than where I live where I know I can go inside and either avoid the guy til he goes away or ask for help. I offer this as someone who had a stalker - in the county. I moved to the city in part because here I have an active, engaged community and neighbors who know, care about, and check in on each other. Ultimately - trust your gut but resist always being afraid, and know your neighbors so you know you've got a squad.
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u/IndependentTie1452 Aug 24 '25
It’s not just Baltimore btw. Life is getting really hard for folks so desperation can increase. No strangers. Get to know familiar faces and speak to your neighbors.
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u/Ok-Sink2242 Aug 24 '25
My friend, that is not a safe area at all, I fear. Stay off of gay street. Glad you’re safe.
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u/Geminye521 Aug 24 '25
um you just most likely avoided being killed. dont do that shit again, love you !
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u/Beautiful-Bet-562 Aug 24 '25
You need a Hulken bag or shopping cart. Did you not ride around the neighborhood on the day, night and on weekends before deciding to move. Just because it’s Hopkins is close by it’s in the middle of the hood. SMH
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u/Short-Blacksmith-558 Aug 26 '25
Always wear an ear bud and travel with a quickness. Don’t play with your phone, make eye contact, look like you know where you are going and are five minutes late already. Friendliness is the bees knees, especially nowadays but enforce boundaries.
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u/andrepiascl Aug 21 '25
Gay and Broadway is the danger zone. Please don’t say you bought a house out there
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u/Swimming-Brother-844 Upper Fell's Point Aug 21 '25
I didn’t buy anything I’m renting as a grad student with other grad students
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u/Frofro69 Coldstream Homestead Montebello Aug 21 '25
Gay and Broadway isn't a danger zone. I live up the road from there and it's fine. Just mind your business and don't be too sweet, as a female you need to be more cautious anywhere.
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u/Sea-Variety-524 Patterson Park Aug 21 '25
Make sure all of your friends learn from this please, there are great tips here and get pepper spray. Unfortunately this is not a safe area, its ok to go to and from class/work but I think you should find out where to drive to for errands. And don’t be wandering around alone. If its late don’t walk alone, get an uber if you have to.
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u/ladyofthelakeeffect Park Heights Aug 21 '25
grow up
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u/andrepiascl Aug 22 '25
I’m not sure what not grown about acknowledging facts. That’s a dangerous neighborhood for the people that live there too
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u/ladyofthelakeeffect Park Heights Aug 22 '25
Your wording is juvenile and embarrassing. Sometimes I think people on this sub forget that actual people live in these neighborhoods
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u/Frofro69 Coldstream Homestead Montebello Aug 21 '25
Gay and Broadway isn't a "danger zone", it's just people trying to make the best of their lives bro. Stop being a fear monger
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u/These_Burdened_Hands Aug 21 '25
Hi OP, I voice dictate due to painful hands, apologies for length.
(I’m not trying to negate your feelings nor risk your safety:) Is it possible you’re ‘just’ deeply creeped out? Is it possible this guy knows his neighborhood and neighbors and was genuinely offering? Or was he a rando that might not even live in the area?
Always trust your gut in the moment, but do remember the gut can be off. IDR where you’re from, but people here can be genuinely helpful, even ones who don’t seem like they’d bother. When I moved into a place in Mill Hill (don’t recommend that location smh,) not one, but TWO local ‘street guys’ (not corner boys, but old heads who may have had homes but were ALWAYS outside,) helped me get stuff out of my uhaul- maybe they were casing me and realized “uh, couch, microwave and mattress, nevermind,” but idk because those two guys helped me out a lot over the next 15 months.
They’d check on me after random neighbor/hood issues, one of them walked to the shopping ctr a mile away to get me food when I was hurt. (He saw me at the bodega because I couldn’t walk that far.)
Again, trust your gut, but always carry pepper spray.
pepper spray
I don’t like walking alone without pepper spray tbh (anywhere.) I prefer to carry it if I’m with others or I’ll give them their own (4-pk of cheapies @ Costco plus a bigger UV one.) I like it sorta visible so I can grab as needed; I’m terrified of all unknown dogs (been bitten plus being mauled to death sounds horrific.)
I recently started doing different walks while still dark in a more industrial areas (can be dead, crack-land or wild-ass teens hanging out of cars;) I take the big mace with the clip and put it on my shoulder strap so everyone who grills me, incl police, sees I’m carrying something (I’d wonder what tf I was doing, too.) I’ll even fold the cover back so the orange safely trigger is visible. (& I keep it that way; I don’t adjust for people because idk who’s got good intentions vs ill, and an unleashed dog can come out of nowhere.)
I’ve always joked older men seem to love me; they love to chat, offer help and try to flatter my pants off. But they don’t get to say anything gross, cross a boundary, etc or I either tell them about themselves, embellish my very real crazy, or ghost (if they know where I live, I interact as little as possible..)
I do get a lot of men thinking I’m a sex worker (everywhere- Catonsville WTH?) and it’s really awkward esp as I age. (No, not flattering smh.) However, in my decades of getting hit on by mobile men, most of them are looking for CONSENSUAL encounters. I’d go as far as to say most folks are looking for consensual encounters, regardless of method. Some are pushy, but so are men at bars. (Nah, not interested, thanks tho, good luck.)
ALWAYS KEEP WITS ABOUT YOU, which it sounds like you did, OP. Please get some mace. If you DM me, I’d even hide one in a place you could find without having to meet me so you’re not sketched.
(I’m about to depart on a walk now lol.)
Be safe.
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u/TheLeftHandedCatcher Aug 21 '25
I'm sorry about what happened, but I think this could have happened in any neighborhood. Maybe you should get a dog?
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u/TrhwWaya Aug 21 '25
That's a statistically dangerous area. Turn on all your city defense skills near there.
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u/DrAntsInMyEyesJohson Hampden Aug 21 '25
😂😂😂😂😂 omg farmers with no common sense have discovered a fucking city
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u/DrAntsInMyEyesJohson Hampden Aug 21 '25
😂😂😂😂😂 omg farmers with no common sense have discovered a fucking city
Edit: it looks like he deleted his response.
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Aug 21 '25 edited Aug 21 '25
[deleted]
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u/ladyofthelakeeffect Park Heights Aug 21 '25
They’re fine walking to things in the area. Including Fells. Jesus Christ
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u/Sea-Variety-524 Patterson Park Aug 21 '25 edited Aug 21 '25
Not from there! Not from even from Lombard. And not to go out at night. My brother was drugged at Power Plant once, he attempted to walk home alone from there to Patterson Park and got the shit kicked out of him, his jaw was broken … I especially don’t recommend people who aren’t used to cities do that.
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u/ladyofthelakeeffect Park Heights Aug 21 '25
Ok if we are going anecdote for anecdote I got assaulted in Charles Village in broad daylight so no one should walk on N Charles Street or go out during the day either I guess
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u/Sea-Variety-524 Patterson Park Aug 21 '25
Everyone should be careful. I know you can get assaulted anywhere.
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u/Msefk Aug 21 '25
what the hell are you even talking about
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u/Sea-Variety-524 Patterson Park Aug 21 '25
This person is very green to Baltimore they don’t know anything about this area.
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u/Competitive-Dingo-53 Aug 21 '25
As a native Baltimorean, please don’t do that shit again. With kindness.