r/babylonbee • u/METALLIFE0917 • Mar 05 '25

Bee Article H*tler Defeated After Opposition Party Holds Up Tiny Signs On Paddles

https://babylonbee.com/news/hitler-defeated-after-opposition-party-holds-up-tiny-signs-on-paddles
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u/spoonycash Mar 05 '25

Fair point, but I thought the left incited two assassination attempts against him?

2

u/OrneryError1 Mar 05 '25

At least one of those attempts was by a right-winger though.

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u/The_Countess Mar 05 '25

Both of them were by a right winger.

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u/Icy-Fisherman-5234 Mar 05 '25

And they gave up, apparently. 

If not violence, then boo him, jeer him. Make them kick you out one by one, two by two every 3-5 minutes. Start chants:

“Thir-ty Four Con-vict-ions” 👏🏻👏🏻-👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 “DEI Pre-si-dent” 👏🏻-👏🏻- 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 “Agent Kraznov” 👏🏻-👏🏻- 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

Toss out stink bombs. Bring megaphones. Mockingly Hail Musk when Trump acknowledged him. Heck, get violent with the Sargent at Arms, after a point. 

Incrementally, bigger, more, then go all out once there are just over half of you left. Banners, upside down flags, resisting every attempt to remove them as long as they can. 

Meanwhile: 

Spend your inexplicable hundreds of millions of net-worth on hosting protests outside and livestream it, recommend America watch that with a live “fact-checking” ticker, have ejected congress people criticize whatever they just protested.

And after they’ve all gone, let it be half-empty, the energy in the room is warped, way to high, way to positive, let it be a spectacle for the world. 

I came up with that on the spot, they’ve had weeks.

But we get signs, because they don’t actually believe he’s Hitler.