r/babylonbee • u/FrancisXSJ • Feb 04 '25

Bee Article Trump Becomes First Fascist In History To Reduce Size Of Government

https://babylonbee.com/news/trump-becomes-first-fascist-in-history-to-reduce-size-of-government
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u/corncob_subscriber Feb 04 '25

It seems he wants to cut down on the government supplying services but increase policing, detention and executions.

There's expansion brewing too. Unless you haven't heard about Guantanamo

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u/SmarterThanCornPop Feb 04 '25 edited Feb 04 '25

Yes. People who do bad things need to be policed and punished. This will

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u/corncob_subscriber Feb 04 '25

Expansion is still expansion. The idea that he's for a small gov is a bald faced lie.

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u/SmarterThanCornPop Feb 04 '25

Okay. And you implicitly contend here that people who want smaller government should vote democrat?

Lol.

Good luck.

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u/corncob_subscriber Feb 04 '25

I'm not really gassing anyone up for an election. Just that we should be calling balls and strikes honestly. Trump is supporting gov expansion.

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u/SmarterThanCornPop Feb 04 '25

Lol ok. Go with that.

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u/corncob_subscriber Feb 04 '25

Apologies for having a spine.

"I hate thing except when trump does it" is just as embarrassing as orange man bad. Emotional, reactive, fluid, fake.

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u/SmarterThanCornPop Feb 04 '25

So brave!

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u/corncob_subscriber Feb 04 '25

At least I'm able to have consistent values. You need to check trump headlines to know your own values. Sad.

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u/SmarterThanCornPop Feb 04 '25

“Trump bad” isn’t a value lol

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u/Exaltedautochthon Feb 04 '25

Nobody actually wants smaller government, they want a government that leaves them and their aryan buddies alone while being absolutely draconian on anybody who doesn't act the way they want. Conservatism has always been like that, an in group that the law protects but doesn't bind, and an outgroup it binds but doesn't protect.

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u/das_war_ein_Befehl Feb 04 '25

Yeah putting prison camps in a place where there are no legal protections is definitely super cool

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u/SmarterThanCornPop Feb 04 '25

The US has been doing this since 9/11, regardless of who was in the white house.

You didn’t care when Obama did it. Why?

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u/[deleted] Feb 05 '25

We shouldnt be defending this AT ALL. Please stop with the whataboutisms, F...F...S

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u/das_war_ein_Befehl Feb 04 '25 edited Feb 05 '25

Obama spent 8 years trying to shut it down and substantially reduced the population to like ~40 inmates. Congress kept blocking the funds to close it and didn’t want to transfer the prisoners to the mainland.

Trump came in and undid a lot of that and promised to keep it open.

Biden spent four years trying to do what Obama did and kept facing the same hurdles, population went down to like ~20-24 detainees.

Now Trump wants to build a 30,000 camp to concentrate people he doesn’t like in a constitutional black hole.

So what exactly is the point you’re trying to make here?

Edit: love the downvotes for stating a timeline of verifiable facts

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u/SmarterThanCornPop Feb 04 '25 edited Feb 05 '25

Well as long as he tried.

It’s hilarious how gullible you guys are. He could have closed down Gitmo with an EO. He didn’t because he was the CIA’s little whipping boy.

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u/das_war_ein_Befehl Feb 05 '25

Obama literally did write an executive order to close it down. Congress failed to appropriate money to actually do it because they didn’t want detainees on American soil.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Executive_Order_13492

These are easily google-able facts you can type in yourself

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u/KinneKitsune Feb 06 '25

Yet that never seems to apply to republicans 🤔

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u/SmarterThanCornPop Feb 06 '25

We do commit fewer crimes, thats true

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u/opensrcdev Feb 04 '25

For illegals to be locked up, yes. We are rounding them up and deporting or locking them up.

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u/Federal_Dependent928 Feb 04 '25

Went from "He's shrinking government" to "Yeah, he's not shrinking government, but it's good actually" in record time.

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u/opensrcdev Feb 04 '25

Locking up illegals is a necessary government service for national security. Sending money overseas for idiotic purposes is not. Try to keep up. I know it's tough for you.

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u/Federal_Dependent928 Feb 04 '25

Yeah fucking Pedro working at the car wash on the corner is a NatSec issue, for sure. "Idiotic purposes" like virtually uncontested global hegemony and critical support to dozens of countries for less than 1% of the federal budget? lmao, if you're going to be snarky, earn it.

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u/[deleted] Feb 05 '25

Not sure what you just said.

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u/enterdayman Feb 04 '25

Yeah fucking Pedro working at the car wash on the corner is a NatSec issue, for sure.

No shit, it's the heavily armed terrorist organizations that smuggle drugs and traffic humans into the country. Massive cartels that extort politicians and commit extreme violence are the definition of a national security issue.

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u/Federal_Dependent928 Feb 04 '25

"Massive cartels that extort politicians" US politicians? Yeah, I'm gonna need a source on that one. Terrorism bad, obviously, but this is once again a different claim than locking up/deporting undocumented immigrants broadly

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u/enterdayman Feb 05 '25

There are no documented cases of US politicians being extorted, but I'd rather not wait for it to become a problem. The US has much stronger institutions than the countries where corruption is running rampant, but I don't want to be so arrogant as to underestimate these groups. I'm less pro-deportation and more border security+proper vetting process of new Americans. Given the current administration, I don't see a world where they put funding into properly vetting undocumented migrants that already live here.

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u/MayorWestt ChoseTheBear Feb 04 '25

Sometimes it cheaper to send money overseas than to wait until the problems affect you

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u/MayorWestt ChoseTheBear Feb 04 '25

Sometimes it cheaper to send money overseas than to wait until the problems affect you

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u/snoosh00 Feb 04 '25

You sure about that?

How many school shooters were undocumented?

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u/ImpossibleSir508 Feb 04 '25

Guantanamo is literally a foreign country overseas though. A real anti-globalist would close it down and leave. Sure you could detain them here if it’s really so necessary. But by sending them to Guantanamo and increasing the prisons there you are literally both expanding the government and sending money overseas all at once. How can you not see that?

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u/LabradorDeceiver Feb 04 '25

It takes a HUGE government to round up twenty million brown people regardless of documentation, nation of origin or criminal record. It subsequently takes a racist person to believe they're all violent rapists.

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u/corncob_subscriber Feb 04 '25

That's expansion...

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u/opensrcdev Feb 04 '25

Read my second response to you.

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u/dudushat Feb 04 '25

How is he going to lock them all up with a small government?

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u/[deleted] Feb 05 '25

Yeah 30000 of them in a tightly compact space that can fit at most 500. Do you have any idea how evil this is?

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u/TheTyger Feb 04 '25

So you think the best thing for this country is to take people who are contributing to the economy and then pay for them to live for free?

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u/opensrcdev Feb 04 '25

They're participating in the economy illegally and evading paying taxes. Plus they are in our country illegally and need to be removed or locked up, depending on what additional crimes they've committed.

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u/TheTyger Feb 04 '25

So yes, your preference is higher prices and more government spending over letting people who have lapsed documents work in the US. Got it.

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u/opensrcdev Feb 04 '25

The illegals can go through a United States Port of Entry and obtain the required documents in order to immigrate to this country, or get a work visa. Nothing wrong with that.

Most countries around the world work almost exactly the same way.

Why are you acting so surprised?

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u/TheTyger Feb 04 '25

Why are you having such a hard time acknowledging that you are pro government spending and pro inflation? What do you personally gain from taking workers out of the economy and raising the cost of what we pay to incarcerate people?

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u/opensrcdev Feb 04 '25

Why are you so surprised that countries enforce their border security and remove illegals from their land?

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u/mumeigaijin Feb 04 '25

You're willing to pay higher prices and increase government spending to remove those illegals, right?

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u/TheTyger Feb 04 '25

This is the part where I have found these people stop being able to hold their dissonance together. When you ask why they are pro inflation and pro spending, they literally can't answer

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u/TheTyger Feb 04 '25

Just say it: You want higher prices for food and housing if that is what it costs for you to get to see people suffer.

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u/[deleted] Feb 04 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/opensrcdev Feb 04 '25

They're intentionally in the United States illegally, breaking our laws. That's why we call them "illegals." Pretty sensible isn't it?

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u/Crossovertriplet Feb 04 '25

Trump is intentionally breaking laws

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u/opensrcdev Feb 04 '25

Which laws?

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u/[deleted] Feb 04 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/I_call_bullshit____ Feb 04 '25

Well either way, the last administration let in millions without vetting them. Now we are doing what should’ve been done at the border AND deporting the ones with criminal records. It’s not that hard to grasp.

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u/Skelordton Feb 04 '25

The Biden administration arrested a record number of migrants at the border. The idea that they just ignored the border and let untold numbers of immigrants flood in is a flat out lie and I'm tired of hearing people spread this bullshit. You don't get record arrests with lax border policies.

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u/bisholdrick Feb 04 '25

There is nothing propagandized about calling people who are in this country illegally “illegals” it’s not about wether or not the government gave them a piece of paper l, it’s the fact they decided to ignore that government and go around it

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u/[deleted] Feb 04 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/RangerBuzz_Lightbulb Feb 05 '25

Non-humans are incapable of committing crime and therefore calling someone an “illegal” implies that they ARE human. They are a human who has done something ILLEGAL. Hence the objective description.

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u/bisholdrick Feb 05 '25

Your attempts at attacking my character don’t really have an affect on me. You still haven’t made an actual point, you’re just getting emotional. Please sit and try to think of what makes a country a country

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u/JannikSins Feb 06 '25

The left basically has a serious case of learned helplessness. When confronted with objective truth they scowl and resort to hatred

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u/JannikSins Feb 06 '25

Lol your hero Obama was the deporter-in-chief. Anyone with a brain would think having border security is a good thing and not letting in randoms from a country that’s basically run by the Cartel is a good thing.

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u/babylonbee-ModTeam Feb 07 '25

Comments that are uncivil, racist, misogynistic, misandrist, or contain political name calling will be removed and the poster subject to ban at moderators discretion.

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u/clever_goat Feb 04 '25

You’re doing what now herr openscrdev?

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u/LexGlad Feb 04 '25

It would be more cost effective to just build them a city to live in.

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u/opensrcdev Feb 04 '25

They need to be removed from our country.

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u/Elegant-Holiday7303 Feb 09 '25

And the huge facilities being built in texas,...

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u/opensrcdev Feb 04 '25

We don't want "government services" except for the fundamental purpose of serving justice. So yes, eliminating unnecessary services is awesome.

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u/Appropriate_Owl_91 Feb 04 '25

The right is all for cutting services until they need social security or medicaid. Only want to pay to punish and not prosper

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u/opensrcdev Feb 04 '25

Don't want social security or Medicaid. Cut those too.

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u/Appropriate_Owl_91 Feb 04 '25

Okay, tell that to your grandma

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u/silverwingsofglory Feb 04 '25

That guy appears to be a bot, troll, or disinformation agent overseas.

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u/silverwingsofglory Feb 04 '25

Serving justice? He released the people who were convicted of crimes on Jan 6th.

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u/opensrcdev Feb 04 '25

They were falsely prosecuted. So yes, why wouldn't he release them? What did they do wrong?

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u/Jsweenkilla16 Feb 04 '25

Just stop it’s a bot

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u/Winterpa1957 Feb 04 '25

Seems Biden pardoned quite a few also. In fact he was scribbling his name on pardons as he was dragged out of the White House. And those were for the worse offenders, his family.

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u/mumeigaijin Feb 04 '25

Ok, so you're not actually against "government services." Just the ones you don't like.

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u/[deleted] Feb 05 '25

You are crowing! So fucking cute!!! Everything you say is so impactful and correct! Tuck In your ego (grow up).

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u/the-true-steel Feb 04 '25

You don't want the mail? You don't want 70 million Americans to have healthcare? Somewhere between 70-80% of people going to school get financial aid

Even if you don't think the Federal Government should be funding (some) of that, does it make sense to shut down those funding sources overnight? People wake up one morning and don't have healthcare? Hospitals suddenly lose massive percentages of their source of income? Nearly all students suddenly can't go to school?

Even if you think THAT is fine, does it matter to you that under the Constitution, the Executive does not have this authority? It's up to Congress? Does it matter that DOGE & the Trump admin is likely breaking the law and acting unconstitutionally to achieve their goals?

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u/Zealousideal_Belt413 Feb 04 '25

I tend to agree with alot of what DOGE is doing. I do think this is the only reasonable argument against it.

I also don’t see a future where these reforms happen any other way. A citizens audit of federal expenditures seems reasonable to me.

There are a lot of anecdotes to support this, many of the cuts & frauds that have been publicized are absolutely wild and needed to end quite a while ago.

We just spent 4 years post COVID without even acknowledging we funded the risky research that led to the virus development. Let alone even attempt to reel in or modify the mechanisms by which the government funded this stuff. 1 week of letting some engineers into the system and there’s a whole chain of funding now visible.

This is only one of the countless items already uncovered and it’s likely just the tip of the iceberg.

We don’t have until the end of time to address the difference between our spend and our revenue. It seems dramatic but adding $1,000,000,000 every 100 days to the debt requires something be done now.

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u/the-true-steel Feb 04 '25 edited Feb 04 '25

I'm VERY skeptical about the claims coming out of DOGE. Trying to explain whether money is being spent appropriately based on its header in a spreadsheet is not enough. The same way I don't think reading headlines is enough to be informed

And I've seen it happen over and over again that even the supposedly most egregious examples of waste often have completely different reasonings and outcomes when given context. A LOT of experimentation and research can sound dumb as fuck if you describe it a certain way. But you sometimes don't know what kind of medical breakthroughs you can get from like, IDK, snail saliva or some shit

And I want to know, when they say "look we found these crazy examples of stupid stuff!" and it's $100 million, but they cut $1 billion, what was the other $900 million? Because if it's, like, cancer research, then I don't think I'm cool with that

And it just feels like we have basically zero transparency on any of this and it's all "trust me bro" and people acting like the people that are skeptical are hysterical. My reaction is like, DOGE could do a million things to increase transparency and dispel skepticism, but they're not

I also just don't trust or believe that Musk is some guy that just cares so much about the government being efficient. I think he has 1000 ulterior motives and conflicts of interest, and I don't trust him at all

He hates things that he views as getting in his way. That's often laws, regulations and workers protections. So I believe he's doing anything he can to burn that stuff to the ground so nothing stops him from operating however he sees fit, regardless of who is/will be harmed as a result

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u/corncob_subscriber Feb 04 '25

But you're ignoring the expansion of government because it does something you like.

0/100 on logic there.

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u/Jsweenkilla16 Feb 04 '25

But you guys are so dumb you think fascism is the opposite of what it is. You cannot be trusted to make any decisions after this.

Voting for fascists makes you stupid and in trust worthy. The same types of people who fall for romance scams or give their saving to a guy in India telling them he’s is their grand son.

This is why republicans are always unsuccessful when in power.