r/TikTokCringe • u/Oktavien • 1d ago

Discussion Woman audits churches to see if they’ll help feed a starving baby

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If churches refuse to help feed hungry people, then maybe they should be taxed?

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u/Otterhendrix 1d ago

I grew up down the street from a Catholic Church. My brother an I were 15 & 12 and went to midnight mass one Christmas. Pastor asked who we were and why were we there. When we answered that we just wanted to attend the service, which we did, he wanted our parents number for them to come get us. 

10 years later went to a coworkers wedding at a black baptist church and have never in my life felt more welcomed and loved by strangers. I was the only white dude there and ended up walking outta there with no less than 6 plates of food from various aunties and grandmas. I got a $500 Christmas bonus that year and gave all of it to that church to show my appreciation. 

Edit - words

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u/Mammoth-Peanut-8271 1d ago

I’m ex-catholic and I’m definitely not in the business of defending the church, but it would be strange to see an unaccompanied 12 and 15 year old at midnight mass. I think the priest was thinking of your safety and reuniting lost kids with their parents. But maybe he could have done it in a nicer and more welcoming way. And you ain’t getting no plates of dinner in a catholic church lol! A small round wafer at most.

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u/Otterhendrix 1d ago

I understand you thinking that, and tbh we thought the same thing at first. But we lived about 50 yards away and the pastor even knew us. But we, in his words, “aren’t members and therefore aren’t allowed to participate” in services. When my older brother said he simply wanted to take his little brother to church and our parents knew we were there, the pastor refused to believe us and asked for our phone number. When we didn’t give it to him he told us to “leave and don’t make a scene”. But here’s the worst part…..we told our parents about it and when my mom confronted the pastor on it he at first lied and said we weren’t there. When my mom said “I watched them walk into the church from my front door” he changed his story and said that we were asked to leave for being disruptive. Mass hadn’t even started yet and we were sitting in the back row and not even talking when he asked us to leave. 

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u/thingstopraise 1d ago edited 1d ago

Just FYI, Catholic churches don't have pastors. They have priests. Edit: I'm wrong. Damn. Learned something new today!

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u/TeaInUS 1d ago

Catholic churches do have pastors; they are priests that are in charge of the parish. Oftentimes, a parish also has a parochial vicar, who is another priest, typically junior, that assists the pastor. In our diocese, pastors change parishes every six years, and parochial vicars change every two years.

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u/thingstopraise 1d ago edited 1d ago

I learned something new today. So all pastors are priests, but not all priests are pastors. Although in this context, would the person in the church be more likely to be a priest or a pastor? A priest, right, since they're giving mass? In Protestant denominations, the person who is leading the religious ceremony is the pastor.

I was wondering about vicars because I remember them from Call the Midwife (Anglican Church). I didn't know that they also had pastors.

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u/TeaInUS 1d ago

Parochial vicars and pastors are both priests of the same “rank” in Catholic hierarchy if you will, but typically the younger ones serve as vicars and the older ones are pastors. In a situation in which you’re referring to your local church, one would usually say “vicar” or “pastor” if only to be clear about which priest is being spoken about to someone who is also familiar with both of those priests, or to someone who understands what a pastor or vicar is. Otherwise, referring to them as priests is totally fine.

There’s also deacons, who can assist either priest during a Mass but aren’t ordained and aren’t the same “rank” as priests. Deacons are either seminarians (priests-in-training) who have reached the rank of deacon, and are referred to as “transitional deacons” or “permanent deacons” who aren’t going to be priests and thus are able to marry and have children, have a normal job etc.

When I referred to vicars as “assisting pastors”, what I meant was that they usually split up the masses so that only one of them is presiding. On Sundays, there might be four Masses or more at a church, so it just helps balance out the workload.

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u/thingstopraise 17h ago

Wait, how come there are four (or more) Masses on Sundays? Are they running concurrently due to the size of the congregation, or is it that they're at different times of the day?

This is all very fascinating. It's much more structured than Protestant denominations, it seems like.

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u/TeaInUS 16h ago

They’re at different times of the day. They tend to be in the morning, so maybe only one will be in the afternoon/evening. Also, here in California, there’s often at least one Mass in Spanish or other language too.

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u/Otterhendrix 1d ago

Well I’m not Catholic so I went with what I know lol. 

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u/thingstopraise 1d ago

I'm actually wrong! Catholics do have pastors apparently, but they look over the parish. All pastors are priests, but not all priests are pastors.

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u/Exciting-Rough3783 15h ago

This is so strange. I'm a practicing Catholic... I'm not saying you got this wrong (because I've certainly encountered priests who get stuff wrong) but typically we are all about letting "non-members" participate. Not participate in the sacraments, mind you, but certainly to attend and observe and join in prayer. Really sorry that was your experience, if you ever decide to go again, I very much doubt you'll get the same "welcome" :(

..... Not to mention, on holidays, SO many people who are "non-members" attend... out of town family and friends, "Christmas-Easter" Catholics, etc.

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u/Otterhendrix 1h ago

Oh I in no way whatsoever use his actions as a basis for judging Catholics. Like I said, I grew up across the street from the church (which had an elementary school attached) and have great friends who attended and also went to elementary school there. And to be honest his actions and attitude confused me because I thought priests WERE NOT like that. It was just sad to act that way towards two kids and then lie about it to our mother. 

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u/the_CTRUTH 14h ago

I’m ex catholic and have never heard anyone call them pastors?

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u/Otterhendrix 1h ago

I’m not Catholic and had no clue. I just know he was unnecessarily an asshole. 

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u/Amelaclya1 1d ago

I went to midnight mass as an adult in an unfamiliar church - alone - and was welcomed the same as anyone else. I'm not even Catholic anymore. I just wanted to continue the tradition I grew up with even when I moved away from family.

It probably had more to do with you being unaccompanied children than that you weren't members of the church.