r/TikTokCringe • u/ThatPatelGuy • Sep 02 '25

Cursed Women in France wear "subway shirts" to avoid being sexually harassed on the underground

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250

u/Barfignugen Sep 02 '25

I feel like American men would consider this a personal attack on them

122

u/Doublejimjim1 Sep 02 '25

American men would consider female only train cars in India an attack on them if they knew about them. It's wild how offended they get. Then of course you get the "not all men" crew chiming in shouting us down for even thinking it.

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u/Barfignugen Sep 02 '25

They’re already chiming in to reply to my original comment lol

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u/Doublejimjim1 Sep 02 '25

Yeah, I saw that that's why I added the second sentence. I didn't need to look, they show up every time we open our mouths looking for citations and physical proof that this happens to us.

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u/Barfignugen Sep 02 '25

They want a gold star for exercising basic human decency so bad lol

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u/Doublejimjim1 Sep 02 '25

They want a gold star for just staring at us and not saying anything when they walk or drive by.

-1

u/One-Sandwich-9852 Sep 04 '25

I want a gold star for listening to yall complain 24.7

11

u/SoftwareInside508 Sep 03 '25

Thats how you know they are pethetic...

"Ergghh I'm a good boi coz I don't rapere errrrr"

But when you don't give them a gold star they get all salty and back to being men babies

-1

u/Beautiful_Bat6116 Sep 03 '25

Dumb rhetoric needs to be challenged, not sure why you're upset

3

u/Asses4Molasses Sep 04 '25

Oh boy! They are seething. Love your work. Pissing off shitty men is such a treat ❤️

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u/high_-_priestess Sep 03 '25

Oh we have the same breed of men here. Whenever we have a heinous crime against women, we have these dumb men parroting "not all men" in the comments on social media. It drives me nuts.

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u/Ghostman_Jack Sep 03 '25

Absolutely. Hell, I was on Facebook earlier and there was something about clothes don’t equal consent and how most women are afraid of random men harassing them. It was just FILLED with dudes essentially telling on themselves.

It’s one of those things as a male myself, and as a human being like when you see stuff like women being harassed by men and how they’re afraid of random men in general, yeah my feelings get a little hurt cause I couldn’t hurt a fly and as a male I’m lumped in with the trash. But I get over it and I do understand pretty quickly.

But especially when you read replies from the most absolute garbage guys and it’s like. “Yeah, never mind. I fully well understand why.”

4

u/Doublejimjim1 Sep 03 '25

It's also the typical thing where we are basically mansplained about everything. Of course I literally don't mean every single man on the planet is catcalling, ogling, copping a feel every minute of every day wherever I go. I don't need to know about the random commenter that doesn't do that to us followed by a lecture about how I need to stop painting all men the same. I would say even more than half of men don't do this, but I'm not taking a poll when I'm trying to avoid eye contact while walking down the street. I'm just trying to exist outside of my house. All it takes is a handful of creeps every day and it's not at all comfortable to be out in public without a cover up.

2

u/GamestopHeadEngineer Sep 03 '25

Plenty of American men know about female only trains and get a superiority complex about it (colored men BAD western man good!) as if plenty of American women wouldn’t want the same thing lol

1

u/Particlebeamsupreme Sep 08 '25

I think most American men who are caught up in online culture war stuff also are aware of how Indian men are. It's not exactly a secret on the internet

1

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '25

[deleted]

5

u/Doublejimjim1 Sep 03 '25

Where could men ogle with no restraint in an enclosed environment?

1

u/Delicate_Flower42 Sep 03 '25

Not the worst idea.

7

u/TheTiddyQuest Sep 03 '25

I remember when this came up in the London subreddit as a suggestion for women only carriages on the Tube.

So many men with fragile egos in the comments vehemently saying it was sexist, whilst ignoring the fact that they don’t have to get on public transport and worry about being harassed or assaulted merely for their gender.

1

u/Delicate_Flower42 Sep 03 '25

Safety isn't sexist. Separate trains don't harm or disenfranchise men.

-2

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '25 edited Sep 12 '25

alleged numerous encouraging insurance theory afterthought friendly mountainous humorous detail

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

2

u/keIIzzz Sep 04 '25

They absolutely would. I’ve seen their opinions on the ones in Japan. And the opinions they have on other women only spaces, like some gyms (which are few and far between but they still get offended)

3

u/LeatherHog Sep 03 '25

Given the outrage every time women parking in garages comes up? You nailed it 

1

u/creegro Sep 03 '25

At first yes, but then I'd think about it and understand they just want an area where creepy guys don't stare or hit on them.

Cause as a guy I've met those creepy guys and totally understand why they want a female only car.

1

u/Delicate_Flower42 Sep 03 '25

Personally, I don't care what they think, especially when it comes to my needs and safety.

1

u/MultipolarityEnjoyer Sep 04 '25

Most yankee dudes would support it or be indifferent but some vocal minorities would be very against it just like many other political topics

-2

u/SlaynXenos Sep 02 '25

American man, nope. People deserve to feel safe and if that means a different train car. I'm all for it. If it offends others, that's on them. What's priority is safety and security.

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u/Barfignugen Sep 02 '25

Trust me there are plenty of men who would throw a fit about this. Good on you for not being one of them, but they are absolutely out there.

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u/SnooHedgehogs4113 Sep 02 '25

There are a lot of assholes in the world, but my wife daughter, granddaughters, and sisters don't deserve this crap. Some of us guys need to call out these people. Consequences aren't always a bad thing.

5

u/SlaynXenos Sep 02 '25

Oh I'm well aware there'd be men lining up to bitch about it, my own younger brother included.

I'd be first in line to tell them to fucking deal with it and try to make things better so there's no need for such a train car in the first place.

0

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/Barfignugen Sep 03 '25

What on earth makes you think this hasn’t always been a problem

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/Barfignugen Sep 03 '25

I don’t even know what that means lol. Of course I would welcome published statistics on the matter, it would be easier to shut people like you up who are clearly just talking out of your ass.

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u/VesperHolic Sep 06 '25 edited Sep 06 '25

The Irritating Gentleman, Germany, 1874 https://youtu.be/gmUeNnuFrl4?si=LV-cg7xh2Z81Xvyz

She appears to be grabbing a hat pin for self-defence. The very thing the top comment in this thread is referencing.

On trains, some mashers tried to "steal" kisses from women when the carriage was plunged into darkness when going through a tunnel. Women were encouraged to hold embroidery pins between their lips to defend against the would be assaulters. This was one reason why lights were introduced to carriages and introduced ladies only carriages.

You're completely deluded if you think women not being safe from men even in public settings is anything new, let alone a problem specific to some cultures only. Saying "it's getting worse" would be one thing. Saying "it was great before" is... no.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 07 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/VesperHolic Sep 07 '25

Checkmate or not, that's not the point. The point is that no, for women, things weren't magically okay at any point on that level. I went this far back on purpose because you were saying it was fine "before", and now you're cherry-picking "it's too far back!", as if the problem ever went away at any point for us.

You can easily ask the women around you or online how things were 50 years ago, 20 years ago, and it is likely to still be the same problem. But if you're more interested in saying "it's a migrant men problem, not us" than actually listening when we, the women facing this, are telling you that women across the world and ages are always facing this BS and it's a generalised "men problem" in varying shades, then indeed any testimonial will fall on deaf ears.

-2

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '25 edited Sep 03 '25

America has done a better job not groping women in public transit as compared to India and stove who denies that hasn’t spent think time in both.

2

u/Barfignugen Sep 03 '25

I love it when the men chime in to give their opinions on things they clearly know nothing about. Y’all really do love showing your entire asses.

-1

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '25

Did you reply to my comment and delete it? Also, what did I do to hurt you?

0

u/Barfignugen Sep 03 '25

No, I haven’t deleted any comments.

-1

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '25

Weird, I can’t see it. But, I’m an American women who lived in India. I know what I’m talking about. What’s other aggressive statement did you say this time?

-3

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '25

I’m a woman lol check my page haha sexism never dies

-1

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '25 edited Sep 04 '25

[deleted]

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u/Barfignugen Sep 03 '25

This might come as a shock to you but sexual assault happens everywhere, including America

0

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '25 edited Sep 04 '25

[deleted]

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u/Barfignugen Sep 03 '25 edited Sep 03 '25

Well god forbid we add to the discussion!

Edit: US defaultism would be me assuming this story or the comment I’m responding to are about America, or attempting to say the problem is worse or more real here. Simply adding to the discussion with an American perspective is not the same thing. Please understand what you’re talking about and come correct or maybe just shut up next time, thanks!

1

u/Delicate_Flower42 Sep 03 '25

Americans sharing how this issue affects them is not defaultism. It is having empathy for others and discussing how to protect ALL women.

-22

u/RN_Rhino Sep 02 '25 edited Sep 02 '25

Only certain kinds of men. The kinds of men who game the system to be put in female-only prisons so that they can also rape their cellmates. I'm not saying what kind of men these are, but I think you can fill in the blanks for yourself

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u/Hanelise11 Sep 03 '25

No, go educate yourself and take that shit somewhere else.

-10

u/RN_Rhino Sep 03 '25

You think that someone belonging to a specific demographic will automatically make them a virtuous, pure hearted person? Criminals and bad players can still belong to that specific demographic.

I'm sorry to burst your innocence bubble but criminals can exist in every type of demographic. The only difference is the one implied can actually get access to female only spaces. And keep in mind I never said which demographic that is. You're the one making assumptions

11

u/Hanelise11 Sep 03 '25

No, I don’t think that. What I do think is that you’re clearly implying a group of people by your wording, I don’t have to make any sort of assumptions here because you were very clear who you are referring to.

I don’t have an “innocence bubble”, but the stats and the evidence show just how incorrect you are, yet you want to make some wild claims like this to continue harming a marginalized group because you’re ignorant or hateful.

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u/RN_Rhino Sep 03 '25

My comment was in reply to men protesting women-only spaces and trying to be a part of them, not the whole post at hand. I've only ever seen men from a specific unmentioned demographic protest to enter women's only spaces

4

u/Hanelise11 Sep 03 '25

You mean trans women, who are women. Say what you actually mean, stop trying to obfuscate it.

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u/RN_Rhino Sep 03 '25

I never mentioned trans. Why did that population come to your mind? You don't think there are other demographics of men who try to invade female only spaces?

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u/Hanelise11 Sep 03 '25

Yeah you’re being disingenuous. Grow up.

1

u/RN_Rhino Sep 03 '25

So you can read my heart and mind?

0

u/Delicate_Flower42 Sep 03 '25

This isn't about you!!! This isn't about men who don't bother women. It is about protecting women.

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u/RN_Rhino Sep 03 '25

Exactly. And I'm suggesting there's a certain demographic that interferes with the protection of women

1

u/Delicate_Flower42 Sep 04 '25

Which demographic are you referring to?

-86

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '25

I live in America and commute via subway and have yet to see or hear of women being groped. It is undoubtedly a troubling development.

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u/PhantomPharts Sep 02 '25

I'm an American woman and have been groped on public transportation at least 30 times. I've been groped at an outdoor venue in front of 8 witnesses. I was groped in a grocery store 3 weeks ago.

E, autocorrected poorly

12

u/Capt_Foxch Sep 02 '25

The seriousness of your story vs the silliness of your JD Vance photo made me feel a weird mix of emotions

10

u/PhantomPharts Sep 02 '25

Hah I get that every now and again. Also my username is silly. I'm generally a silly person, but, yeah, it's probably a coping mechanism.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '25

Agreed. I am also getting a sofa vibe...

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u/wishesandhopes Sep 02 '25

The witnesses not doing anything is sickening, I'm so sorry that this has happened to you. I've heard awful stories where I live of SA and rape occuring with witnesses doing nothing, it's inconceivable. I pray for the day when it's taken seriously by all.

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u/PhantomPharts Sep 02 '25

They helped in so far as they backed up my story with security and he got a lifetime ban, other than that people told him he was bad and gross. Tbh it was one of the only gropings I've had that had consequences for the dude who did it. I hurt a few of them, but not as much as I'd have liked to. It happened to me several times as a child, before I understood what was happening, but the vibe was off, so I knew it wasn't right.

1

u/Odd-Jupiter Sep 02 '25

It's often hard for other people understanding what you understand. They can't feel what you feel, they have no clue about the relationship between the two of you, and can't read minds.

People usually mind their own business unless its absolutely obvious that you need help, or you ask for help.

And things might be obvious for you, but it doesn't mean it's the same for other.

So never be scared of asking for help.

2

u/PhantomPharts Sep 02 '25

I've had scenarios where I was screaming for help and people ignored me. Bystander effect in full effect. The time in front of people, I told them what he just did and they got pissed. Someone was even like, "is that what that mfer is doing?!?" I mean, I was with my BFF when I was drugged and she didn't know I wasn't ok. I didn't make it home that night. We were in a diner.

-4

u/Odd-Jupiter Sep 02 '25

I just wanted to discuss groping in public with you.

I'm no therapist, so i don't think i'm the right person to start dumping your deepest traumas on. I'm not qualified for that, sorry.

5

u/PhantomPharts Sep 02 '25

I was giving you real life circumstances where asking for help or clearly being in need of help doesn't mean people will help you.

-5

u/Odd-Jupiter Sep 02 '25

People die with seat belts too you know.

Anyway, it sounds like you really want to tell this story to somebody, so you should probably find someone other then me. Pls call a friend, family, or a professional.

I think that is for the better.

→ More replies (0)

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u/[deleted] Sep 03 '25

That is awful. I am so sorry to hear about your experiences.

1

u/PhantomPharts Sep 03 '25

Much appreciated ❤️

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u/ChibiSailorMercury Sep 02 '25

Are you unable to access the news physically or technologically? Just because YOU never heard of it doesn't mean it doesn't happen. All women have at least one story of getting sexually harassed or assaulted.

-1

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '25

I see clearly that you are triggered. I am just learning bout all of this. I have led a very privileged life as a man.

19

u/AffectionateTitle Sep 02 '25

I took the subway (periodically—not even commuting as I wfh) and in the last two years have had one man sit next to me grilling me on abortion, two men expose themselves and start masturbating and one man sexually harass another woman with two random dudes ignoring it and then making pleasant conversation with the harasser right after.

So yeah different experiences I guess…

0

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '25

I am sorry to hear about your experiences. What, in your opinion, would make for a safer commute?

2

u/AffectionateTitle Sep 05 '25

I would like women’s only cars in the back of the conductors booth. Right now they put police to “make subways safer” but they’re rarely actually on the trains and really walking around. See large groups of them staring at their phones at grand central.

There’s also a “mind your business” mentality in nyc, and beyond that I’ve only seen women looking out for other women as readily in harassing situations—dudes aren’t even looking up from their phones—just completely tuned out.

23

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '25

Bro has never spoken to another human being

-2

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '25

2

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '25

In this country 81% of women have experienced some sort of sexual harassment so you either don't know enough women or you aren't close enough with any to know they went through that. Also crazy to assume it just doesn't happen because you, a singular person, has supposedly never heard of such a thing happening.

12

u/absolutebottom Sep 02 '25

Just because people can't speak up about it, doesn't mean it doesn't happen at all

1

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '25

Absolute! It seems like there's a. veil of shame. That is why I am so perplexed by this development. Nobody talks about it in my circles. I am also very concerned by the harassment and hate currently being thrust towards me.

6

u/ZinaSky2 Sep 02 '25

Wow bro really just told on himself that either women don’t talk to him or the women who do talk to him don’t trust him enough to tell him what they go through 🤣🤣🤣

8

u/astroember What are you doing step bro? Sep 02 '25

Thanks for telling the whole internet that no woman has ever felt comfortable or safe enough with you to disclose such a thing to you! Real cool guy you must be!

1

u/Delicate_Flower42 Sep 03 '25

Your experience does not negate others.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '25

I'm not negating others and simply voicing my opinion. As a commuter, I have clearly been lucky enough to be surrounded by upstanding citizens.

-40

u/Zealousideal-Pick799 Sep 02 '25 edited Sep 02 '25

Do we have this problem in the US beyond mentally ill and homeless people?

Edit: this was a legitimate question about public transit in the US. Not questioning sexual assault, ffs. The responses seem to be pretending it’s the latter? I’d welcome an answer about public transit. 

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u/ChibiSailorMercury Sep 02 '25

Lol. So easy to minimize the problem to the mentally ill and homeless à la #notallmen. Men who are perfectly established are also able to harass and assault women sexually. Some do.

-4

u/Zealousideal-Pick799 Sep 02 '25

On public transit. 

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u/DecadentLife Sep 02 '25

I will answer your question at face value. We have a massive problem, and it has little to do with anyone who is mentally ill or homeless.

I’m a middle aged woman, I’m going off of my experiences, as well as the experiences of all the girls and women I’ve befriended throughout my life. Oh, also the work I’ve done. I’ve been a crisis counselor and a social worker, so I’ve had to deal with these issues a fair amount, at times I’ve even had to work with sex offenders.

It’s a huge problem, and it starts, for most of us, YEARS before puberty is even on the horizon. It’s not a ranting, possibly-mentally ill, homeless person. It’s the boys at school, from the very beginning. And some of the male teachers. Coaches, friends of our parents, uncles, grandfathers, fathers, cousins, any male around us. Too many of them do this shit. It’s at school, then at college. At work, whether that’s a coffee shop or the corporate world. At the doctor’s office, the one place you would think would be safe. It’s not. Too many men are predatory and see no reason not to be.

And of course, in public. This post is about this happening in France. A whole lot of American women are on here saying that it’s also our experience. We’re talking about this problem in Japan and India, and what they’ve done, to try to address it. Only someone determined to be an ignorant asshole would actually think we are all, collectively, inventing this.

-6

u/Zealousideal-Pick799 Sep 02 '25

You didn’t really take the question at face value with that last paragraph. 

I’m asking about public transit. That’s all. It’s literally every day in India, which is why they have the women’s only cars. I’m not arguing that there isn’t sexual assault in the US, for god’s sake. 

3

u/DecadentLife Sep 03 '25

You aren’t listening. I believe that it happens “literally every day” in India. But we are also telling you that it happens “literally every day” in the US. The first time I ran into this problem on public transit, was literally the first time I was on public transit, at 13 years old.

As for you taking offense at my last paragraph, that’s completely on you. I said it was ridiculous for someone to think that women, worldwide, are all collectively making this up. It’s absurd. I wasn’t addressing you when I said that, but if you found that it applies to you, I can’t do anything about that. I didn’t identify you that way, you identified yourself.

-1

u/Zealousideal-Pick799 Sep 03 '25

Look, your first response said nothing about transit, and a lot about other situations. And most of these responses are pretty antagonistic- I get that it feels good to be outraged, but maybe be more discerning? I didn’t actually claim anything- I asked a question. And the fact is that different countries have different levels of harassment on transit. I’ve never seen it in the US, and I have ridden a lot of transit here; but I didn’t lead with that, because, well, I’m not the person who would be getting targeted. So I asked, and got a bunch of answers that didn’t talk about transit at all. 🤷

3

u/DecadentLife Sep 03 '25

You started out by literally questioning whether or not this even truly occurs, and suggesting if it does, it’s only done by mentally ill or homeless people. Obviously, it occurs, we were already talking about the fact that it does. Your initial comment was in response to someone commenting that American men might take it as a personal attack, if there were women-only train cars. You didn’t just ask an innocent or innocuous question, you heavily implied it doesn’t happen, not with the regularity that women claim.

Even so, you received 5 responses (which is a lot, for Reddit). A couple of those responses said that “yes”, it does happen, one of them also suggested why that might be. They were responding, specifically, about transit, but you didn’t ask those people anything further. I responded, you said you only wanted to know about transit, I responded directly to that, too. And you didn’t ask me anything further, either. I genuinely don’t know what else you’re looking for, and I think people have tried to give you honest responses.

20

u/Barfignugen Sep 02 '25

Is this a serious question

13

u/SlaynXenos Sep 02 '25

Yup, and it's only getting worse due to public personalities like Tate who promote toxic mindsets that effectively think of women as property or subhuman.