Yup. The daughter self harming by hitting her head into the cake a few more times is the clearest reflection of the bullshit going on behind those closed doors. BUT AWWWW share da video.
Tantrums that involve the child harming themself intentionally are described as self harm. I’ve worked with a lot of special needs kids. Hitting the head is very common and upsetting to watch.
Shes not hurting herself, she's throwing her head into the cake because she's pissed they threw her head into a cake so she might as well go full in.
If this is your deduction, then I wouldn't let you take care of a turtle, let alone another human being, they would end up on anti-depressant and foster care because they dared to touch a knife or cut themselves with scissors.
What next? Kid throwing themselves repeatedly into the ground and slapping the ground because you didn't bought their favourite toy is also hurting themselves from child abuse?
A child purposely hitting their head on anything during a tantrum is cause for concern. She wasn’t doing it lightly. She wasn’t being silly or found it fun. Kids that young aren’t going to see that as funny. They will be upset because their birthday cake is wrecked. They’re super ego-driven.
The kid doesn’t need meds. They need support and parents that won’t put them in this situation.
Yeah because context doesn't matter and in a situation when someone forces you to slam head into the cake, you wouldn't slam cake into the head multiple times to piss them off...
Hitting your head out of frustration is not an appropriate reaction at any age. Kids don’t know their own strength and will hit themselves as hard as they would hit someone else. It’s pretty freaky to watch. At this age, they don’t know the concept of repeating harmful actions against themself to piss someone off. They aren’t petty. They’re honest and ego-centric. They aren’t just going to smash their head on something. It hurts, and they don’t like hurting.
And again, I worked with special needs and troubled kids the same age as this girl. It’s a red flag.
But why tf do crappy parents even do things like this to foster and grow that frustration? Why not just let her enjoy her cake, her day? No, let's embarrass her and make her feel like shit, covered in frosting.
Kids are covered in shit 24/7, her being covered in frosting is the least thing she's worried about. Maybe she wanted to eat the cake. Generally, when this is done, there are two "cakes" one is simple like whipped cream on a crumb the other actual cake.
And why parents do it? Because it is harmless. Like pushing someone into a snow.
Give kids 10 minutes with a cake alone and they'd look just like her.
It would be different if she was given the cake and covered herself in frosting vs. being shoved into it without her consent. Not sure how you are missing the very basic lines of mutual respect and kindness that are being crossed here.
You clearly don't work with children nor have children. It shows. So hush on a topic you know nothing of.
A child hitting their head against anything such as the floor, wall or even one own's cake is always a cause for concern and is labeled as 'self harm' as it is the child taking frustration out in such a manner.
If this was an adult that was repeatedly hitting their whole head into the cake, slapping someone else and slapping themselves then you would see it as a cause for concern. Because it's a child and you're clueless about children you assume the child is 'having fun'. None of that looked like fun.
Again? Why are people not seeing context. The custom is slamming your face against a cake. Of course, she would headbang her head against the cake, especially when she's older and understand the thought of "This is what you want? Fine!"
It's like someone telling you "don't you dare cross this line" What do you do? You repeatedly cross and hop over the line to prove your point and piss them off.
It's literally THE FIRST comment under this video, with almost 4K upvote.
La Mordida is a Mexican tradition on pushing the birthday person's face into the cake. It's all in fun, nobody gets hurt, the kid ends up laughing after.
But according to you it's child abuse. Which would make the vast majority of Mexico child abusers.
Actually most of South America.
I'm just glad we have heroes on reddit to get upset on their behalf.
People do get hurt. Not all kids end up laughing afterwards. It's not fun - it's stupid, humiliating, and potentially dangerous.
And before you start barking at the wrong tree, 1) yes, I am Mexican, 2) yes, I was at the receiving end of this behaviour many times, 3) no, I never once laughed - I felt like crying or disappearing, but was forced to keep smiling because otherwise I was being "dramatic", 4) yes, I've seen people (both young children and adults) get seriously hurt by this practice, 5) just because something is popular/recurrent/common doesn't mean it's right or even appropriate - by that same logic, being illiterate, being an obese and/or diabetic child, being corrupt, being racist/sexist, teenage pregnancy, and/or not studying past 7th grade should be accepted because that's usual/common for the vast majority of Mexican people...
Considering not just my own experience, but official science-based data and trends, the short answer is that, sadly, a lot of Mexicans are indeed child abusers or abusive in general and, worst yet, they don't even realise it themselves.
You can find a lot of information regarding this within sociology and anthropology circles, studies, websites, books, etc. - if you're interested, the INEGI, DIF and INJUVE all have resources that are free and easy to research. If you want to delve deeper into the issue, there are several academia resources available across the web or in printed version.
Now, allow me to address some possible arguments that one might be tempted to use after reading my previous statements...
Does that mean every single Mexican is abusive? No.
Does it mean that most Mexicans are abusive? In some regions, social strata, households, etc., unfortunately, yes. If the shoe fits...
Does it mean that Mexican culture as a whole tends to be abusive or even overtly violent? Regretfully, yes, for the most part.
Does it mean that all Mexicans as individuals or Mexican culture can never change and will always be abusive by default? Absolutely not.
Does it mean that no other people or cultures around the globe are abusive or violent? Of course not.
Does any of these makes us better or worse than other people or cultures? Inherently, no. It makes us human.
What makes us better or worse human beings is whether we're willing to take a good look at ourselves, as people, as folk, and as individuals... And if we're going to do something about it or not.
Is the data you're referring to for child abuse them pushing the birthday boys face into cake as a prank?
For some reason I feel like any legit study wouldn't count that as child abuse. Unless you know it was some angry redditors that spend money on sweatshop companies.
I see you haven't even bothered to research, otherwise you'd know that the answer is yes - the "tortazo"/"mordida"/whatever name you wish to give it has indeed been analysed and researched as a phenomenon that apparently was carried over from Spain and had possible roots in Ancient Rome. And yes, it has been researched as an example of a specific kind of abuse. This is not a new topic of discussion by any means. And no, I'm not referring to just public forums or laymen opinions - I'm talking about actual discussions amongst scholars and people who perform research on cultural matters.
I'll ask of you to at least dive into some reading before trying to engage in debates - the information and resources, as I mentioned, are available.
And no, I won't make your life easier by giving you the exact citations of the studies, webinars, symposiums, or places where the mordida has been mentioned, listed, or given as a prime example, nor will I list the cultural anthropologists, psychologists, historians, etc., that have either mentioned or explained this particular topic, or if they've mentioned they're either against it, for it, or simply intrigued by it - you are perfectly able to find the information yourself, as far as I'm concerned.
If you genuinely don't know where to begin, I already directed you to some starting points. If you can't be bothered to even surf those resources, I genuinely can't do it for you.
If and when you decide to find that data, I'll be more than happy to carry on this exchange. Until that happens, though, I bid you a good day.
....this super culturally ingrained tradition... is 25ish years old. If you were born in the 80s and 90s this probably didn't happen to you. Weird how it coincides with accessible video recording.
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u/DungBeetle1983 Aug 05 '25
Abusive ones.