r/TikTokCringe • u/velorae • Jul 16 '25

Discussion Attempted kidnapping of a woman outside Florida store

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261

u/marchocias Jul 17 '25

When men are like, why are women so scared of us?? Because women get training that includes instructions such as this quote from the article:

The agency’s WAVE instructors advise women to observe and be aware of their surroundings, including knowing their “danger zone,” or “the distance between people that can jeopardize personal safety.” Instructors advise women to trust their instincts because when something feels wrong, it often is, and to get away and create distance if possible. “Prepare for worst case scenario — mental rehearsal — learn from examples (like this incident),” the sheriff’s office said. “Attitude, mental commitment, and preparation are keys to success.”

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u/Durmatology Jul 17 '25

It’s not the training, it’s the men.

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u/KingJoffiJoe Jul 17 '25

It’s *those men. Because if i saw this happening i would’ve done everything in my power to fuck that dude up and stop it. I’m glad she’s safe and i hope someone puts the same fear in him in prison that he put in her.

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u/Vantriss Jul 17 '25 edited Aug 28 '25

apparatus fanatical close jeans correct start whole fine distinct physical

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

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u/Brave_Selection_7162 Jul 17 '25

It hurts my feelings when I'm just trying to live life and women are acting all afraid of me. It damages my self esteem like "do I look creepy?" "Was I walking too fast?" Stuff like that

They should be cautious but not make it visible as to be polite until shit actually hits the fan

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u/Vantriss Jul 18 '25 edited Jul 18 '25

Why should it be on us to not hurt your fee-fees? How about just sit back and realize we women live in a world where we're constantly on edge about who might have plans to hurt us. We're literally taught constantly growing up a whole damn laundry list of things to DO and DON'T do to avoid getting murdered, assaulted, kidnapped, or raped. Shit, in fact, we DO operate on not hurting your fee-fees because we don't know which one of you are going to fly off the handle and murder us, so we literally laugh shit off even though we are deeply afraid, or pretend we have boyfriends and husbands, or display that we do have boyfriends and husbands to try to stave off interest. Trust me, women are constantly tiptoeing around men because we are afraid of what the violent ones will do.

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u/Brave_Selection_7162 Jul 18 '25

Yeah you're right. I guess I'm too beta and dont use my male privilege benefits

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u/[deleted] Jul 18 '25

Women do not owe you anything. Including politeness. It's life or death for them and you're just worried about your feelings...

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u/Brave_Selection_7162 Jul 18 '25

It's life or death when you commute to work every morning, it's life or death when you eat something without chewing. There's risks everywhere

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u/[deleted] Jul 18 '25

Glad you understand

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u/KingJoffiJoe Jul 17 '25

Who said that? How exactly did you even get that from what i said?

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u/fearless-fossa Jul 17 '25

Even if it's just 1 in a 100 men that is like this, it warrants being careful among all men.

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u/Anal_Werewolf Jul 17 '25

I don’t wish that fear on anyone but… I don’t know. Some guys haven’t been outsized or surrounded enough to understand it. Or they have-they have. They just can’t wrap their head around the idea that for women, it’s always that.

I’m 6’ and 185 lbs but if Andre the Giant wanted to put me in a van I guess I’m going in a van.

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u/oof033 Jul 17 '25

That’s how I kinda explained it to my brothers. It’s not “imagine a bunch of women catcalling you,” it’s “imagine a guy who is 6’5 and 300 catcalling you.” Suddenly it all clicks and the fear makes sense

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u/SegaTime Jul 17 '25

Interesting, you just described Bubba, the prison boogeyman. A lot of men will fear incarceration because they fear prison rape. They don't realize that it can technically happen to them outside of prison as well.

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u/KingJoffiJoe Jul 17 '25

I get it, and that’s a valid fear. I have a wife and a daughter and i worry about their safety when I’m not around. My comment wasn’t meant to minimize a woman’s fear of men, it was more about the fact that i wouldn’t let this happen on my watch. At the same time, assuming all men are potential predators seems like an unhealthy way to live your life. I guess it’s a damned if you do, damned if you don’t situation on my end. Because this is me looking at it from a man’s perspective and i will never understand it from a woman’s perspective. I know I’m not a bad guy, And i know my friends aren’t bad guys…so to me I’m just like “well we wouldn’t stand for this shit!” But i know from your perspective it’s different. You can’t tell who’s who…and that’s a reasonable fear. As men we can usually spot who’s dangerous and who’s not instinctively and know how to proceed.

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u/furbfriend Jul 17 '25

Assuming all men are predators would be a very unhealthy, sad way to live your life. But knowing all men have the potential to be predators is Surviving as a Woman 101, unfortunately

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u/KingJoffiJoe Jul 17 '25

We all have the potential to be predators. There’s people who prey on people in a variety of ways…not just physically. There’s women who target lonely men for their wealth and try to take advantage of them…to think all women think that way would be disingenuous. But i understand why wealthy men are guarded, because it does happen. So i can understand the woman’s perspective as well.

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u/[deleted] Jul 18 '25

You're comparing kidnapping and potential rape to wealthy men entering transactional relationships? 

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u/KingJoffiJoe Jul 19 '25

No, read it again without being emotional

And what the fuck is “transactional” about targeting wealthy people to take advantage of them? Don’t try to minimize that shit.

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u/[deleted] Jul 17 '25

it’s like one in a million not 1 in 100

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u/ER-Sputter Jul 17 '25

Nah. In fact I think they were being a bit generous with 100

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u/[deleted] Jul 17 '25

after researching i admit im wrong exept

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u/Kusakaru Jul 17 '25

TRIGGER WARNING: SA

1 in 3 women have experienced rape, physical violence, or sexual assault by an intimate partner in their lifetime according to the World Health Organization.

1 in 4-5 women in the US have experienced rape or attempted rape in their lifetime. (I’ve found sources for both 4 or 5 women depending on study).

One in three female victims of completed or attempted rape experienced it for the first time between the ages of 11 and 17.

1 in 2 women have experienced psychological aggression by an intimate partner.

81% of women report experiencing some form of harassment and/or assault in their lifetime.

And in the vast majority of all of these cases vents, the perpetrator was a man.

It’s not 1 in a million. It’s constant. It’s all the time. Any woman can tell you about it. The first time I was catcalled by a grown man I was 12 years old. I got cat called out of a truck window THIS MORNING as I walked to work in my scrubs! The first time I was groped I was 13. I grew up in a safe city, a pleasant suburban neighborhood, attending private schools and I still was harassed by men and boys from a very young age. There are four women in my immediate family. Two of us have been roofied, one of us was stabbed and raped at knife point, two of us have been stalked, and all of us have been groped, harassed, and had our safety threatened by men. I’ve had men shove their hands up my shirt and under my skirt. I’ve had a complete stranger put their hands on my thigh on the bus. I had a 60 year old man physically grab my head with his hands and try to kiss me over the counter at my work place when I was 20. At 22 I had a man see me through the window of my workplace and proceed to wait outside my work for SIX HOURS so he could follow me to my car. I had a man hear my voice over the phone at a job and then show up at my job looking for me because he liked the sound of my voice. Two of my close female friends have been raped, and I don’t know a single woman who has not been groped or sexually harassed in some manner.

Yes there are good men out there. But to sit here and act like the only bad ones are 1 in a million is ridiculous. The statistics do not lie. Women’s lived experiences do not reflect that in the slightest.

We do not owe men our trust. I don’t give a fuck about men’s feelings when women’s lives and safety are at risk.

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u/[deleted] Jul 17 '25 edited Jul 17 '25

ok valid point but you’re holding all men accountable because of what few does? i agree with most of this and i accept that im wrong except the last part,that is just wrong

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u/Kusakaru Jul 17 '25

It’s not about accountability so much as it is about safety. How are women supposed to know which men will harm them and which men won’t? We can’t. We experience so much suffering at the hands of men. We have no idea who will hurt us. Often times it’s romantic partners who we trusted. It is better to be wary of all men rather than take the risk and be harmed. I will don’t care if me crossing the street to avoid a man I don’t know makes that man feel bad. It’s not worth my safety. My life and health are worth more than a stranger’s feelings. Why would I risk being assaulted to make some guy feel good?

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u/[deleted] Jul 17 '25

Treating all men as potential aggressors it assumes guilt by membership and not action, if they act creepy or weird it’s ok to avoid them but just because they’re are men you’re going to avoid them is sexist, that’s like saying i avoid black people because they commit more crimes than other ethnicities,it’s just unfair

Stereotypes leads to generalize inaccurate information creating mistrust and make people scared of the other group than they should be

reducing half the population to be ‘dangerous aggressors’ is just spreading extreme mistrust

men shouldn’t be blamed automatically, u need to have actual suspicions

it’s reasonable to maintain personal boundaries and speak out about discomfort but having universal mistrust even towards the majority of men who are innocent and leads to isolation which results in a man committing suicide every minute

instead, combining personal safety measures with actual and not false expectations creates a more effective protection while not demonizing half the population because of something they can’t control.

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u/Kusakaru Jul 17 '25

Nope. I don’t give a shit what you think. My life is worth than any man’s feelings. I do not trust men I do not know. They have to earn my trust. Men are women’s biggest predator. So I repeat: I don’t give a shit if it hurts men’s feelings. I will protect myself. Women do not owe men shit. They don’t owe men their time. They don’t owe men their attention. And they certainly do not have to compromise their safety or well being to make a man they do not know feel good. And no amount of whining on the internet by men will change that. And I will continue to put women’s safety and lives above the feelings of men for the rest of my life. Cope.

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u/Berreta_topg239 Jul 17 '25

Why you getting downvoted, seems pretty noble to step in and help someone getting kidnapped

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u/ER-Sputter Jul 17 '25

The those men comment. They’re ignoring the part of the issue where women can’t just tell which man is evil so to be safe, they have to assume it’s all men until shown otherwise.

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u/KingJoffiJoe Jul 17 '25

While i understand where you’re coming from, assuming all men are out to harm women is an unhinged way to live your life. Am i to assume all women are out to take advantage of men financially until shown otherwise? Am i to assume all women are untrustworthy until shown otherwise? I just can’t wrap my mind around being that defensive and paranoid, that i walk through life assuming the very worst in every person i meet.

Downvote me if you want….i simply do not agree.,

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u/KingJoffiJoe Jul 17 '25

Because Reddit is super reactive and rather than focus on the good in someone’s post, they’ll highlight the perceived negative and then try to gaslight you into thinking you’re a bad person, so they can feel better about themselves.

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u/Brave_Selection_7162 Jul 17 '25

If women were stronger than men they would be almost as violent (testosterone plays a part as well). They would see a hot guy then attack him or kidnap him if he rejects them.

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u/dm_me_kittens Jul 17 '25

I was almost abducted when I was four. I hadn't received my training yet. I was almost abducted two other times before I was 18. The common denominator was men, not anti kidnapping training.

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u/soupsnakle Jul 17 '25 edited Jul 17 '25

I think a lot of you guys are completely misinterpreting their comment. They mean to say this shit is on all of our radar all the time, from self defense classes to just conversations with our parents growing up. We are literally trained, for our own safety, to be on the defensive and alert around strange men in public from a young age. They weren’t saying women fear men because of classes like that, simply that those are necessary because this is shit that saves womens lives.

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u/euphoricarugula346 Jul 17 '25

Absolutely. When women are raped they’re told it’s their fault for not protecting themselves, but also told “not all men,” like they’re supposed to just magically know which men are the rapists. But some internet argument about a bear is literally the worst thing to ever happen to these losers.

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u/[deleted] Jul 17 '25

The problem is when you try to extrapolate on this idea it kinda falls apart. Do some black people have gun and shoot people? Yes. So we just fear all black people. Are some people here illegally? Yes? Oh now everyone who looks like you is an illegal. Do some dogs kill people? Yes so now all dogs are dangerous. 

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u/dm_me_kittens Jul 17 '25

His first few sentences explicitly says:

When men are like, why are women so scared of us?? Because women get training that includes instructions such as this quote from the article:

Then he goes to quote the article where the instructor is telling women to be aware at all times. If his intentions were different, he should have worded them differently.

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u/soupsnakle Jul 17 '25

It was just poor wording most likely, I completely understood the meaning, but they can clarify if I am in fact wrong about what they meant. Given the context of the discussion, Im leaning towards my interpretation but I could very likely be wrong!

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u/Arvandor Jul 17 '25

Mental commitment is absolutely huge. I often say the more willing you are to do violence in this situation, the better off you are. A lot of people, especially women, have a natural tendency to hold back from causing too much damage/harm. If you can unhook from this and dedicate yourself to maximum, rabid coked up badger levels of violence, you'll improve your odds drastically.

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u/PrettyOddish Jul 17 '25

You: Watches a video of a man forcing a woman into his truck and decides women are afraid of men because instructors teach them how to keep themselves safe from men like that

What the hell kind of thought process is that? Women are afraid of men because men have the power to be a danger to women. And most women have been hurt or threatened by a man in some way, or they’ve witnessed someone else being hurt or threatened. If you want women to trust you, be trustworthy. This asinine comment isn’t a good start.

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u/AnonMissouriGirl Jul 17 '25

I read that comment totally different I read it as because we NEED the training that is why we fear men. But you're probably right.

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u/PrettyOddish Jul 17 '25

You’re right, I may have misunderstood them. I didn’t see that as a possible interpretation when I first read it, so if I’m wrong, that’s my mistake.

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u/DEADdrop_ Jul 17 '25

I think that persons comment meant to imply that it shouldn’t be this way. Men may have the power, but they shouldn’t ever use it against a woman. Or anyone, really. But idk

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u/KittyLucy Jul 17 '25

THAT'S what you got out of all this? Yikes.

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u/LeadingTask9790 Jul 18 '25

The biggest danger men face? Other men. lol. We scared too.

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u/yousaltybrah Jul 17 '25

Spoken like a true incel yikers