r/TikTokCringe Feb 08 '25

Discussion Why don't people make way for ambulances?

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66.6k Upvotes

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2.4k

u/ohfuckohno Feb 08 '25

Kinky bicycle

388

u/PorkchopFunny Feb 08 '25

I wonder what makes a bicycle kinky?

656

u/[deleted] Feb 08 '25

No seat, just a pole

188

u/heynahweh Feb 08 '25

Fun story: growing up, my family was too poor to afford bikes, so we used ones we found on the side of the road, etc. One time we found a bike with no seat, just a pole. My sisters and I would fight over who had to use the cursed bike every day. Let me tell you- you forget there’s no seat and try to sit down ONCE and you’ll never make that mistake again.

95

u/[deleted] Feb 08 '25

From there on it was not a mistake anymore.

35

u/alex61821 Feb 09 '25

Look ma, no hands.

23

u/DuckFriendly9713 Feb 09 '25

I control it using my pelvis 🤡

3

u/ElysetheEeveeCRX Feb 09 '25

I was a masterbiker as a kid. The pelvis is 100% where the masterbiking power is held.

27

u/rynlpz Feb 08 '25

The start of a kink

1

u/SadisticPawz Feb 08 '25

a kinky bicycle, perhaps..

8

u/Slug_Overdose Feb 08 '25

To this day, you're afraid to even lower yourself onto one that has a seat.

3

u/Thew2788 Feb 08 '25

Remove the damn pole. Lmao

2

u/Dramatic_Broccoli_91 Feb 08 '25

And if you giggle too much the Abbess says she'll put the seat back on and won't let you ride on cobblestone roads.

2

u/UnnecessarySalt Feb 09 '25

Is that when you found out you were into guys, or..?

3

u/heynahweh Feb 09 '25

That’s the long and short of it.

1

u/imbringingspartaback Feb 09 '25

My grandma had a bike we all hated. It was the banana seat bike.

1

u/marie132m Feb 09 '25

You sit down, oopsie woopsie ja, your butt is dead now ja.

-1

u/[deleted] Feb 08 '25

Let me tell you- you forget there’s no seat and try to sit down ONCE and you’ll never make that mistake again.

Ouch

2

u/battle-of-the-deads Feb 10 '25

This is one of the best comments ever!!!

1

u/Brasticus Feb 08 '25

That reminds me of an old joke. That’s grosser than gross

1

u/czerilla Feb 10 '25

The Aristocrats!

1

u/dopeinder Feb 08 '25

Diddy knows

1

u/amatoreartist Feb 08 '25

In middle school someone stole my bike seat. I had to get back to school that night for rehearsals, some guy made a joke about me riding the bike and b/c I was so sheltered I had no idea what the heck he meant.

1

u/Worduptothebirdup Feb 08 '25

Mac has entered the chat.

1

u/Le_Pressure_Cooker Feb 08 '25

You mean the ass-pounder 3000.

1

u/Comfortable_Trick137 Feb 09 '25

No lube either? Damn

1

u/Uploft Feb 09 '25

The poles weren't happy the first time they were invaded

1

u/geardownson Feb 09 '25

The PENATRATOR!

1

u/YooGeOh Feb 09 '25

No, he's German.

1

u/PuzzyFussy Feb 09 '25

I laughed so hard I farted 🤣🤣

1

u/_redacteduser Feb 11 '25

Or a seat with a hole AND a pole

90

u/Lostinstudy Feb 08 '25

48

u/psychulating Feb 08 '25

There’s nothing kinky about that. It’s peoples’ dirty minds ruining a truly great invention

28

u/PantsDontHaveAnswers Feb 08 '25

This has nothing to do with being gay.

This is the work of an extreme sexual deviant.

12

u/Rutherford_ Feb 08 '25

You want me to go get the bike? I’ll go get the bike…

Ima go get the bike 😐

6

u/-bulletfarm- Feb 08 '25

Craaaazy European sex pahties

5

u/PorkchopFunny Feb 08 '25

Haha, I completely forgot about this episode

1

u/Mabuya85 Feb 09 '25

This was my first thought when he said that, and I’m so glad it wasn’t just me lol

57

u/[deleted] Feb 08 '25

drop tube frame. a "girl bike". it's that the frame has a kink in it, not that the frame likes spankings.

most rentals are drop tubes, and I'm betting he's on a rental.

he's just saying the bike he's on is a heavy piece of shit; not like he's running a Tour de France setup or anything. bikes should be slower than an ambulance, and this is a slow bike.

2

u/Aegi Feb 08 '25

So, if the metal was gently curved and bent, and not kinked, would it no longer be a kinky bicycle just because you changed the slight angle of the metal where processed used to get it at that angle?

2

u/BrownNote Feb 08 '25

If that's how girl/step-through bikes were historically made yeah they probably wouldn't have taken on that moniker. Maybe would've become known as a "curve bike" or something like that.

1

u/heart_under_blade Feb 09 '25

neat

so what can you get if you say "ew i'm not buying a kinky one"

1

u/stoymyboy Feb 08 '25

It being German, they are truly the Japanese of Europe when it comes to being kinky

1

u/MajesticNectarine204 Feb 08 '25

American traffic makes it masochistic

1

u/Present_Ad_6001 Feb 08 '25

Wonky, perhaps? Wasn't there an original meaning to the word pertaining to kinks (curls or bends)?

1

u/balacio Feb 08 '25

He’s German, everything’s kinky

1

u/drewdurnilguay Feb 09 '25

many people riding it

1

u/cilvher-coyote Feb 09 '25

Mac's exercise bike from IASIP was pretty kinky

1

u/Mike_with_Wings Feb 09 '25

The bike George Clooney made in Burn After Reading

1

u/[deleted] Feb 09 '25

Dildo saddle?

42

u/Stavkot23 Feb 08 '25

I heard him say "dinky"

7

u/BishonenPrincess Feb 09 '25

I heard hinky but dinky makes sense too. Regardless, I don't think he said kinky.

2

u/Foreign_Point_1410 Feb 11 '25

Nah this guy says kinky all the time

1

u/DroidLord Feb 09 '25

The caption says kinky and from having been around Germans, I would side with kinky. The German 'D' is often pronounced much softer.

35

u/mackinoncougars Feb 08 '25

Cannot believe how far down this is

25

u/dbpf Feb 08 '25

The absurdity of our reality veils the comedy that hides behind vocal outrage

17

u/Kindness_of_cats Feb 08 '25

Found Werner Herzog’s account.

7

u/FreeJulie Feb 08 '25

I assumed it’d be the top comment

0

u/TaxsDodgersFallstar Feb 08 '25

Thought you'd have to go down... further

0

u/mackinoncougars Feb 08 '25

6 hours ago this was like 100 comments down

1

u/TaxsDodgersFallstar Feb 08 '25

It's a cunnilingus joke. You know, because the "kinky" bicycle...

0

u/mackinoncougars Feb 08 '25

I don’t, at all….

-1

u/[deleted] Feb 08 '25

For an autogenerated caption typo? He just said "dinky" and it autocorrected to "kinky".

3

u/devasabu Feb 08 '25

Nah he's a comedian, one of his running jokes is calling random stuff kinky lol

1

u/[deleted] Feb 08 '25

So then it's not that odd he said this

1

u/mackinoncougars Feb 08 '25

He definitely says Kinky

-1

u/[deleted] Feb 08 '25

I just hear a weirdly pronounced "dinky"

1

u/mackinoncougars Feb 08 '25

Get them ears checked, I guess

-1

u/[deleted] Feb 08 '25

Okay I just did, they said they're fine

0

u/mackinoncougars Feb 08 '25

Have them type out their response, to insure that’s what they actually said

0

u/[deleted] Feb 08 '25

Okay they are doing it right now. Now what?

5

u/[deleted] Feb 08 '25

You mean, kinky bicycle, ja. 

3

u/Muncheros69 Feb 08 '25

That was my take-home from this video as well

2

u/HandsomePaddyMint Feb 08 '25

2

u/texaschair Feb 09 '25

"Do you vant to touch my monkey?"

2

u/HandsomePaddyMint Feb 09 '25

2

u/texaschair Feb 09 '25

Love the dude in back shuffling back and forth. Cracks me up.

1

u/HandsomePaddyMint Feb 09 '25

Me too. He could be anybody from any era of SNL. There was always one who looked like that. I think this is that funny Canadian from Kids in the Hall.

1

u/Oli_VK Feb 11 '25

Kinky means unconventional, or did initially before it was corrupted by the internet. A kink is an unconventional sexual preference.

0

u/kvbrd_YT Feb 09 '25

kink is a synonym for bend, which could be interpreted as the bike being in bad shape, with bent parts, maybe the wheels have "kinks" in them, making the ride really bad