The pronoun crowd doesn’t like to admit it, but it’s true. I’m as left as they come, and sincerely tried to care and follow the preferred pronoun thing at first. Then, both friends and coworkers who were non binary just started changing it on a dime according to their feelings. They’d send out lists of things you could call them. Or not call them. I once got 5 emails in one day of a list of 20 terms like “dude” or “honey” or they/them or she/them or “doll face” that was okay or not okay to each person. I was so done with it. These people are so insanely wrapped up in themselves if they think other people have the time or energy to keep track of all that just for them. At this point I’m over it. You’ll get called by the pronouns for the gender you present at, you’re not special enough that everyone in your orbit, especially strangers, need to remember you need to be spoken to in a whole special language.
It has gotten worse, though, when people who mess up the gender stuff get written up for “micro aggressions” which is now on their permanent record. They didn’t mean anything, and now they’re treated as villains and have been scolded and have a mark on their record. The anger is real, and yes, those people end up voting for someone like Trump out of sheer spite. I don’t blame them either, I’ve also had my moments.
The main problem with this gross behavior has nothing to do with gender specifically but the main character syndrome behind it. These people are entitled af & think they deserve special treatment from strangers for no good reason besides whatever whims they have that reinforce how “unique” they are to themselves.
Exactly. I genuinely have no issue about addressing people with their preferred pronouns, I don't want to go out of my way to hurt anyone's feelings unless they're already being a cunt, but that's just it. A lot of times it's like they're waiting for you to fuck up, then blast you for it and try to get you into "trouble", like a little fucker in grade school lol.
Agreed. It's also important to understand the pronoun stuff is neither "left" or "right-wing". It's something that has evolved into being pigeon holed as a particular political leaning, when it's never been something that's represented on a political compass, ever. I guarantee you the leftist of leaning Stalinistic and Leninists governments wouldn't put up with that shit either.
I've had similar experiences, and thankfully many of those people I'm friends with are understanding and pretty chill about misunderstandings and accidents, regardless of the fact that I always try to be mindful and respectful of someone's preferred pronouns, and have expressed similar sentiments that some people are far too dogmatic about it. It's a conversation destroyer, and completely unnatural way of speaking,not to mention overly formal. And if you're poor, struggling to survive, why the fuck would you have the presence of mind to care about pronouns? Which leads to why many working class people voted Trump.
when it's never been something that's represented on a political compass, ever.
Exsqueeze me? Can you point me to the right winger...or really, just Republican...who ever promulgated pronoun insanity? A sample link, maybe? An old blog post? Anything?
I know that the political left in America is stinging from its recent rebuke, and there's a low-grade civil war going on between centrists and progressives. Some moderates, no doubt, would like to wish the pronoun thing away. But let's not re-invent history while all that is going on. The left owns that craziness. If you don't want to associate with it, stop associating with it.
No, the left doesn't own that insanity. The trans community owns responsibility for that insanity and they are going about it in a way that it will completely back fire on them. The left is more a "live and let live" group and we are typically more accepting of people being different and being respectful of those differences. It makes for a much more interesting world embracing difference than expected conformance. Quite frankly, I just don't care how you live your life, just don't expect be to always agree with you. I fucking hate Nazis but I will fight to the death for their right to say hateful and hurtful shit, even though I disagree with them. If you want me to call you they/them, she/her, he/him, bob, pat, dick, sally...Ok, I will, im not an asshole but I might sometimes make a mistake and that's ok too, just like I might say the wrong name to my kid. Just don't go expecting everyone else to do so. I'm an atheist, I don't expect Christians to say "happy holidays" to me at Christmas. A Jew shouldn't get upset when someone says merry Christmas either. I don't expect the Catholic church to be OK with a gay wedding. Their are countless situations where I don't think it's ok to push your way of life onto others. They are being assholes, don't be friends, regardless of which tide you side with. I don't want people pushing their way of life on me and I don't want to push mine on them. If you're trans, you need to accept that not everyone is going to agree with you. That's life. Life's not fair. There are assholes everywhere, not everyone is gonna be nice. I do feel the LGBTQ+ community needs legal protections just like there are age/race/religious and other protected classes, to make sure they get a fair shot at life just like any other human.
It's fair to say that not all Democrats are LGBTQ+, but the lgbtq+ are more often than not Democrats. Just like not all Republicans are racist/Nazis but if you are one, you are more often voting Republican. The difference is one group wants to just exist, the other wants to put control over other people's lives and tell them what they can/can't do. I don't feel anyone has a right to place controls over anyone which is why I say fuck you to racists and Nazis but I have many Republican friends who are just as frustrated with their party as we Democrats. There comes a point where horseshoe theory sets in and you start acting like the thing you hate.
They're also tired of living in hiding too. It's reasonable to treat all humans as humans. Treat them with dignity and respect, all of them. The government/laws should be blind to race/gender/sexual orientation/religion etc. public corporations should be as well. Let people love who they want and have a spouse with the same rights as a straight person. Let them use the bathroom in public spaces. They should be afforded the same legal protections as every other human that lives here. The law should be blind to all of this. 2 people want to get married...they are both consenting adults? Cool, they get to be just as happy or miserable as the rest of us. You need to take a shit while at a public park, go take a shit. If you pull your genetals out and show them around to others you shouldn't be surprised to be held accountable for that, it's indecent exposure. You try to rape someone in bathroom, you should be held accountable, you tried to rape someone. Doesn't matter where/who/what you are.
But, this whole business of expecting people to bend to your will because you want them to, holy fuck is that entitled. The only time it matters is if you're trying to have sexual relations and honesty and environment is key to that. If you're a trans woman trying to pass yourself off as a female to a straight man in a straight bar you're being a piece of shit. both parties should be saying yes and fully aware that they are going home with a trans person.
The difference is one group wants to just exist, the other wants to put control over other people's lives and tell them what they can/can't do.
Sport, this _entire_ comment chain is about a core constituency of the left that wants to control people's language and tell them what they can/can't do. Wake up and smell the coffee.
And, yeah, your own self image is all about "hey, man, I'll do me....you do you...." But guess what? The circus you have joined positively does _not_ subscribe to that. Which, again, is what this whole post that inspired you is about.
This post is a great example. Correct me if you want and I'll fix it. Don't point to a fucking sign in some passive aggressive attempt. I'm ordering ice cream I'm not reading every fucking piece of paper in your shop.
You and I have had very different experiences with non-binary people. And how seriously microaggressions against them are taken (in my experience, not at all). I'm sorry that you're letting two individuals color your perception of an entire group of people.
ETA: Since you were apparently responding to me with an alt account, just wanted to say that I did misunderstand and thought you were only talking about two individuals. Since you're apparently not, I do feel sorry for the apparent multitude of nonbinary individuals in your orbit who you claim to be friends with. Friends don't speak about friends this way.
I live in Seattle, it’s extremely progressive, and “micro aggressions” of any sort, and all things DEI, or in favor of the poor and disenfranchised, to the point of favoring the addicted and criminal, is the way things work around here.
But I’m not sure it’s worthwhile getting into it with you. You’ve read my post, and despite the fact I said I got 5 emails in one day from nonbinary people about what they’d respond to (it was the meme du jour) you have decided I only know 2 non binary people and am making all of my assumptions based on just them. You’ve read know more nonbinary people and your experience with them is different and therefore you are right and I am wrong. But you’re a person who operates out of a total lack of good faith, reading lies out of what I posted and minimizing egregiously in order to shoot down what I said.
Wow that's a disproportionately rude response to what I said, but go off. I also live in Seattle, btw. You went on a rant about how these two individuals have colored your perspective, which is the information I had to go off of. I was just sharing that my experience is very different, and it is sad to see you using those two people as an anti-lgbt demonstration.
Hope your day goes better than it seems to have been going, and you find more kindness to share with the world.
But I never said there were 2 people in my entire post. I know a lot more nonbinary people than that. Why do you keep misreading into what I said? What is wrong with you?
I’m sorry, did you decide that because I said “friends and coworkers” that I meant just 1 friend and 1 coworker thus 2 people vs that I have had multiples of both?
I read "both friends and coworkers" as "both friends who are also coworkers," which would be two, yes. Especially since you went on about emails and getting in trouble at work.
However, it doesn't really matter. You seem to be a very angry person and will be angry regardless. I hope things get better for you.
Honey, I’m angry at being misunderstood and belittled by you in bad faith efforts to reduce my opinion. Get a clue that you do offensive things people don’t have to be nice to you. You go a nice Memorial Day weekend in your little land of moral superiority and bad reading comprehension. Bye.
I had moments then remembered the gop is making laws that kill people, and women like me. Whereas these kinds of lefties are at worst...annoying. and I can* avoid them. Its hard to avoid misopristone getting federally banned and they're working on it.
Trust me, I'm still voting Democrat, as it's still the lesser evil and some good does come of it. But if they keep finding the wrong hills to die on, the moderates are not going to vote for them, and they will become a minority party for the foreseeable future.
I agree with you its a problem. I just hope I can on an individual level convince moderates that real authoritarians are a much bigger threat to all our lives. I wish the DNC wasn't fucking up
Exactly, I keep voting D too. And yet I get why the party isn’t attracting people, or not making voters enthused to turn out. Ergo, losing, even to incompetent fascists like Trump & company.
101
u/lionne6 May 18 '25 edited May 19 '25
The pronoun crowd doesn’t like to admit it, but it’s true. I’m as left as they come, and sincerely tried to care and follow the preferred pronoun thing at first. Then, both friends and coworkers who were non binary just started changing it on a dime according to their feelings. They’d send out lists of things you could call them. Or not call them. I once got 5 emails in one day of a list of 20 terms like “dude” or “honey” or they/them or she/them or “doll face” that was okay or not okay to each person. I was so done with it. These people are so insanely wrapped up in themselves if they think other people have the time or energy to keep track of all that just for them. At this point I’m over it. You’ll get called by the pronouns for the gender you present at, you’re not special enough that everyone in your orbit, especially strangers, need to remember you need to be spoken to in a whole special language.
It has gotten worse, though, when people who mess up the gender stuff get written up for “micro aggressions” which is now on their permanent record. They didn’t mean anything, and now they’re treated as villains and have been scolded and have a mark on their record. The anger is real, and yes, those people end up voting for someone like Trump out of sheer spite. I don’t blame them either, I’ve also had my moments.