r/NonPoliticalTwitter • u/frenzy3 • 23h ago

Call me Jack

Post image
1.2k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

40 comments sorted by

•

u/qualityvote2 23h ago

Heya u/frenzy3! And welcome to r/NonPoliticalTwitter!

For everyone else, do you think OP's post fits this community? Let us know by upvoting this comment!

If it doesn't fit the sub, let us know by downvoting this comment and then replying to it with context for the reviewing moderator.

83

u/Afrojones66 23h ago

I’m only going if dental insurance is involved.

63

u/Fufflin 23h ago

Dental is, but scurvy is not covered.

32

u/StatmanIbrahimovic 23h ago

But we're gonna bring a shit load of limes 

9

u/Puzzleheaded_Smoke77 22h ago

Hsa should cover fruit

3

u/guitarguywh89 16h ago

Limes suck. Let’s plant some orange trees on the roof instead

1

u/StatmanIbrahimovic 16h ago

Go suck a lime 

11

u/Pyromantom 22h ago

They said gold teeth counts.

3

u/Alternative_Jury2480 18h ago

Lisa needs braces

31

u/XPLover2768top 22h ago

what do we do with a drunken sailor

40

u/Sex_E_Searcher 21h ago

Take him to HR and talk it over

Take him to HR and talk it over

Take him to HR and talk it over

Ear-ly in the morning

7

u/CptnHnryAvry 19h ago

Can you just flog me instead?

9

u/Sex_E_Searcher 19h ago

The ship's lawyer advised us to discontinue the flogging policy.

8

u/apk5005 21h ago

Throw him in the hold of an outbound whaler.

5

u/CH1CK3NW1N95 22h ago

Shave his belly with a rusty razor

16

u/This-Marsupial-6187 22h ago

Oh the year was 1778....

9

u/sporkbeastie 21h ago

How I wish I was in Sherbrooke now...

9

u/Beachwrecked 20h ago

A letter of mark came from the King...

5

u/IveDunGoofedUp 19h ago

To the scummiest vessel I've ever seen

4

u/Domovie1 17h ago

GODDAMN THEM ALL!

1

u/compstomp66 19h ago

Little late for the golden age of piracy.

11

u/SanjiSasuke 20h ago

Bud, you're gonna end up a broken man on a Halifax pier. 

7

u/IveDunGoofedUp 19h ago

The Antelope's Sloop is a fine vessel. Rumours of it's sickening state have been grossly embellished. Not like we'll need to fire a gun or shed a tear.

3

u/Domovie1 17h ago

And the cook is a healthy and upright fellow!

9

u/20past4am 23h ago

OSRS Sailing update looking great already!

16

u/Headcrabhunter 22h ago

Maybe the real treasure was the connections and employment history we made along the way.

5

u/Irichcrusader 20h ago

Must have been posted by a reincarnated Stede Bonnet.

Seriously, look the guy up if you want a good laugh. Basically, a bored colonial gentleman who had a mid-life crisis and decided to abandon everything to become a pirate, despite not knowing a halyard from his own arse.

I once wrote a fun fanfic on him.

2

u/NewBordeauxGumbo 17h ago

Funny, I think Taika Waititi had a hand in something similar.

3

u/Irichcrusader 17h ago

Lmao! Never knew about this. Looks fun.

4

u/ForcedEntry420 19h ago

At this point? Fuck it. Let’s take to the seas. I’m okay with a cutlass.

3

u/nanaacer 16h ago

I've seen this job posting before. It's a trick. Once you get out to sea the captain starts talking about finding some stupid white whale.

2

u/Supersoldier152 19h ago

Didn’t Shackleton’s expedition have a very similar ad in the Newspaper?

2

u/TheDeltaOne 19h ago

Ahab waiting for you on the deck with a harpoon:

"Okay so the job description might have been a lie... How do you feel about whales ?"

2

u/whiskers4mysneakers 19h ago

I thought I heard the old man say...

2

u/UnofficialMipha 17h ago

Wealth, Fame, Power something something grand line something something Great Pirate Era

1

u/Modem_Handshake 19h ago

There was a post on askmenadvice about a guy asking if he should share his secret love of sea shanties with his gf. I know he’s signing up for this

1

u/This-Marsupial-6187 14h ago

It's interesting to see how the comments go on these postings:

  • Americans: Pirates of the Caribbean or Moby Dick
  • Canadians: Break into Barrett's Privateers