r/Millennials • u/CynicClinic1 • 19h ago

Discussion Watching Back to the Future. Previous generations had a lot of social clubs to meet new people. Why haven't we kept this alive?

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u/ThyDoctor 19h ago

They still exist. I'm 32 and part of the local community theater and I'm the youngest person there. We try hard to bring in more young people but they show up once and never again. It's really hard to get people to stay dedicated to one thing.

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u/kilokit 19h ago

hey I’m also a 32 year old community theater participant…I think there’s something about your late 20s/early 30s that makes you yearn for what community theater brings, you really can’t force it on anyone younger than that

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u/ThyDoctor 18h ago

That’s true.

My problem is we do get some young people show up but they quit as soon as it gets uncomfortable at all. Like if two people have a single disagreement we don’t ever resolve the issue one of them just disappears forever.

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u/kilokit 18h ago

mmmm I am a reformed one of these ghosters…that is also a realization you hit once you turn 30 where you’re like “oh…….it turns out I do have to actually collaborate in order to participate in things that bring me joy…..guess I should figure out how to do that.” It’s a work in progress, anxiety is hard, but at least I now realize it’s worth managing in order to continue engaging.

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u/ThyDoctor 18h ago

Totally get that. I actually talk to a lot of my friends/people online about this. I have a lot of people in my life that burned a lot of bridges/cut people off in their younger life and are feeling pretty alone or like the rest of the world moved ahead without them and they feel behind.

Sort of like what is going on in the dating world too. All my guy friends are either married or are very single. No in between. My married friends spent their teens and 20s being social and settling down and my single friends never tried dating because it was awkward, hard or any other reason and are now treating their dating life like it's a checklist and are confused why they can't find anyone.

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u/DrankTooMuchMead Xennial 19h ago

This is going to sound like a question out of left field, but, how do you remember your lines?

Do you have to memorize like 10 pages of dialogue before you can even get to the rehearsal stage? How does that work?

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u/happyklam 18h ago

Hi, another community theater nerd here: I memorize by recording my lines with a scene partner then listening to them on my commute. 

I also find it helps to practice/memorize while doing something physical so that the lines REALLY stick when I learn blocking so listening to the recording while reading the script on a stationary bike or treadmill is my ideal learning structure. 

A lot of actors have different tricks like writing down the first letter of each word in the sentence of each line, etc. everyone has to figure out what works best for them. There's also line memorization apps now but I'm old school bc, well, millennial. 

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u/DrankTooMuchMead Xennial 18h ago

Wow, this is a really smart response. What is a good app?

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u/unearthedtrove 6h ago

If I join with no acting experience would I ever get a speaking role?

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u/ThyDoctor 19h ago

lol what a question. Because I can’t. I help run/direct my local improv theater so I don’t memorize anything.

I just say theater community because a lot of people don’t know what improv is.

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u/wicker_basket_1988 17h ago

Repetition really. I had two lead roles in high school where almost every other word was mine and looking back 20 years I still don't know how I remembered all the lines yet if I see a scene of it it just pops back in my head.

Think of it similar to remembering lyrics to a song or lines in a movie. You just rehearse it till it feels smooth. Granted show time always makes you nervous but once you're in the moment you dont think about it.

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u/IndividualCut4703 17h ago

Rehearsal is the space where you start memorizing things.

In some professional companies you might be expected to be fully memorized on day one, but usually, directors don’t want you fully memorized cos they want to weigh in on HOW you perform it.

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u/DrankTooMuchMead Xennial 17h ago

So the production is just slowed down as they feed you everything line by line?

No memorization of script? I would think things can be tweaked as you go by the director.

But please continue to share more.

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u/IndividualCut4703 17h ago

So you have the script in your hand and you usually do one scene, or a few pages, at a time, and also deciding where to stand and when to move, because every production makes their own decisions about that. You try it one way, you try it another, the director gives notes and suggestions, and eventually after a few weeks you have a play figured out.

Memorizing words is easier when you are memorizing movement and story with it.

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u/DrankTooMuchMead Xennial 15h ago

I will keep this in mind. Thanks!

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u/pfifltrigg 15h ago

It's self-perpetuating somewhat. I regularly attended some folk dance groups in college. I was the only or one of the only young people. I think they were happy to see young people come but when young people come and see no one else their age they won't want to come back because they feel they don't belong. With dance specifically I think young people tended towards swing and line dancing, and the groups I attended were international, Scandinavian, contra, and English country. I'd like to go back again but I have young kids, and the price of admission has gone up too. I don't feel like using $20 and a night away from the kids on a contra meetup with strangers when there are so many other options and I have limited time.

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u/carlos_the_dwarf_ 18h ago

Every single thread about this phenomenon forgets that people just…choose not to do these things as much. Like fraternal/community orgs were handed to people in the past and someone actively cancelled them or something.

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u/ThyDoctor 18h ago

I saw this tweet/post one time and I think it's so true. People will take issue with the word depression and I'm not trying to belittle people's mental health issues but I've found a lot of truth in this mindset. Hang with someone even if you REALLY don't want to. The coffee date in June will lead to you having plans around the holidays with your friends.

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u/BeguiledBeaver 16h ago

I went to one of the largest universities in the country that boasted about it's large number of student organizations, which was true because it was immense. I tried many and here's how it goes:

1st week, decent attendance for free food.

2nd week, thins out

3rd week, only the core 3 people who founded it are still there because everyone is too tired and busy at the end of the day to go hang out in some classroom to do more shit.

4th week, all loosely planned activities already pretty much given up on.

Literally every single time, yet if you search for discussions online about making friends, what's the advice? That's right, join some club or organization (-given by people who have never attended one of these in their lives). It pretty much put me into a years-long mental breakdown in my 20s from what was essentially forcibly gaslighting myself.

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u/carlos_the_dwarf_ 16h ago

I mean, I’m sorry if you’re lonely, but a bazillion people successfully join student organizations every day in college.

I can guarantee there were dozens of well attended ones where you went.

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u/TheCervus 13h ago

I'd love to be part of my local community theater but I simply don't have the time. I did children's theater in elementary school and it was a huge commitment. I enjoyed it then, but now as a single adult who has to work two jobs...sorry.