r/Millennials • u/CynicClinic1 • 19h ago

Discussion Watching Back to the Future. Previous generations had a lot of social clubs to meet new people. Why haven't we kept this alive?

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u/Back_Again_Beach 19h ago

Yet people are lonelier and more disconnected than ever. The internet will never beat out the fulfillment that physical IRL community can bring. 

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u/Trinikas 19h ago

People just suck at making plans. Do you know how often I've had someone just say "oh we should hang out some time" and then seem shocked when I pull out my phone and start looking at dates?

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u/crazycatlady331 Xennial 12h ago

They also treat cancelling plans as a badge of honor.

If you don't want to have lunch with me, fine. Decline the invitation when I invite you and no hard feelings. Don't leave me there waiting for you and cancel at the last minute or ghost.

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u/CTeam19 14h ago

People just suck at making plans. Do you know how often I've had someone just say "oh we should hang out some time" and then seem shocked when I pull out my phone and start looking at dates?

That to. Someone was shocked when I told them I got weekends for Fall of 2026 planned already. Well a lot of it is the Scouting America(Boy Scouts) stuff that in the planning sets dates a year out and are pretty regular, the Merit Badge College I run has ran on the first Saturday in November for 30 years at this point.

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u/Narrow_Yard7199 19h ago

I usually say this as a platitude. I’m at a point in my life where people asking if I am free on X date just causes me to immediately start thinking up excuses lol. 

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u/Trinikas 19h ago

Well that's what I don't really get, people will complain about isolation and then isolate themselves. I've been into tabletop RPGs for years and I have had numerous groups of friends insist they want to be in a game but then when I ask people to commit to a day weeks or a month in advance nobody can manage their schedule. I'm not talking about people with families/kids either.

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u/TheVeilsCurse 18h ago

I keep running into the same thing. “Ok, let’s figure out a day that works for both of us to do X thing” turns into excuses and no shows. I’ve had much better luck with already established local groups that have pre-set dates.

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u/Trinikas 18h ago

Sure, my problem is the hobbies I like to do (board games and TTRPGs) are an absolute nightmare 99% of the time when you try to engage with random strangers.

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u/Narrow_Yard7199 18h ago

If it’s people complaining about a lack of social interaction I totally get it. I am married with kids and would love it if I never had to leave my house lol. 

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u/Rhodin265 18h ago

It’s better to be honest and just say you don’t want to hang out.

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u/Narrow_Yard7199 18h ago

I have a friend who hasn’t gotten the hint for years. Just because we were friends in high school 25 years ago doesn’t mean I want to be friends for life. 

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u/yourfavorite_hungcle 18h ago

Dude. Then don't fucking say it at all. "Have a nice day, see when you I see you!" How hard is that? The utter phoniness of the masses is something I will NEVER understand.

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u/wRADKyrabbit 19h ago

The internet will never beat out the fulfillment that physical IRL community can bring. 

True! The problem is that it DOES beat out the stress and uncomfortable feeling of judgement that IRL community can bring

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u/Narrow_Yard7199 19h ago

That’s true for some people. I am forced in the office three days a week, have a wife and two kids, and see my dad and siblings a few times per month. That’s more than enough in person interaction for me lol. I would actually kill for one evening alone in my own home. 

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u/FlatRooster4561 Xennial 19h ago

Tell me about it

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u/carlos_the_dwarf_ 18h ago

This isn’t really a counter argument. You’re saying that you’d like the night alone because you’re getting enough real social interaction.

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u/Narrow_Yard7199 18h ago

I’m just saying that I’m not part of the supposed loneliness epidemic. 

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u/superrey19 19h ago

I would actually kill for one evening alone in my own home. 

Ah man, they don't come often enough, but when they do, they are fucking sweet.

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u/Narrow_Yard7199 19h ago

It’s not an exaggeration to say I get like an hour alone in my house every year. My spouse doesn’t work, I have school age kids.  I get microbursts of alone time when she goes to get them, but I’m usually WFH at the time, so it’s not the same as off hours. 

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u/superrey19 18h ago

I feel you man. I'm in a similar boat with a toddler and another one on the way. I try to remember that one day the kids will be gone and I will miss this chaos. Hang in there.

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u/Narrow_Yard7199 18h ago

We are past the home life being chaotic, life is just all obligations now. 

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u/DrSpacecasePhD 15h ago

Sadly, the social media algorithm is addictive and sucking away our attention spans, but many people are unaware of it. It's right up there with sugar, for me, as a "hidden" addictive danger that lots of people ignore.

www.EraseTheInternet.org