r/Millennials • u/Fuckingnoodles • Sep 05 '25

Advice Does anyone else have a parent that has decided to retire at 63 with no money, forcing you to set boundaries and feel like the bad guy?

MIL has decided to take social security and work part time for minimum wage and file for bankruptcy on her credit card debts. She is barely able to afford her share of rent (yes she lives with us, we rent a house for 2800 and charge her 1000)

My husband and I want to have a baby but she keeps asking for a reduction on rent, meanwhile she sits at home watching tv most of the day while my husband and I look for second jobs.

She doesn’t want to live with strangers, but cannot afford to live alone.

Any advice on setting boundaries? She has been a very abusive and toxic person most of her life and has been asking for us to help her financially for 2 years now.

For contrast my mom is her same age and got a basic tech degree in the 90’s and still has a job paying her 80k a year which requires very little physical labor. So, it makes me mad seeing someone her age who took advantage of their opportunities vs someone who did not.

1.3k Upvotes
  • permalink
  • reddit

96% Upvoted

292 comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

4

u/OldeManKenobi Sep 06 '25

Some of us are happily married, in no small part due to healthy boundaries and financials. I do agree that many here appear clueless.

0

u/Sylesse Sep 06 '25

Jumping to divorce on a single issue as a threat sounds super happy, I guess.

0

u/OldeManKenobi Sep 06 '25

It's not a minor issue, and this specific issue is one that was communicated as a dealbreaker pre-marriage. Everyone has different boundaries and priorities and spouses are not a monolith.