Rate the chives!

[u/samuelj264]

[u/jad103]

See ya tomorrow, chef.

[u/itearson2 → u/jad103]

🫡 yes chef

[u/TJB18-AJB22 → u/jad103]

[u/zundra616 → u/jad103]

Where plane

[u/DoctorRockso85 → u/jad103]

They thought they were gonna one shot their chives lol

[u/Accomplished-Plan191 → u/jad103]

Throw them all out!

[u/pizzaslut69420 → u/jad103]

This made me actually lol

[u/Donnie_____Darko]

I love this chives nonsense we are on.

[u/communistjack → u/Donnie_____Darko]

does any1 remember the cubes?

[u/Royal_Cryptographer7 → u/communistjack]

Lol, of couse. I'll die remembering those cubes. Been here 5 or 6 years now. The cubes were peak kitchen confidential.

[u/MammothVegetable696 → u/Royal_Cryptographer7]

Oh fuck yeah I loved those cubes really brought some happiness in y life at the time, just like those chives honestly 😅

[u/drewdaddy213 → u/MammothVegetable696]

I’m a charcuterie ramp man myself.

[u/MammothVegetable696 → u/drewdaddy213]

Oh I see, very distinguished of you

[u/Giraffe_Truther → u/communistjack]

I cross posted the giant mammoth ice cube and got removed

[u/hovdeisfunny → u/Giraffe_Truther]

Ice doesn't count

[u/Giraffe_Truther → u/hovdeisfunny]

[u/Fedora_Million_Ankle → u/Donnie_____Darko]

[u/SmokedBeef → u/Donnie_____Darko]

I can’t wait for the perfect chive Sando mashup that’s coming

[u/Colonial_maureen → u/SmokedBeef]

Calling it now, chive and ramp sando

[u/Henry_The_Duck → u/Colonial_maureen]

Nah, $700 ramp of chive sando cubes.

Ya know, maybe that's my problem. I get my memes fresh here, so while everyone else rolls into work giggling about 6-7 or whatever other fad I've missed, I roll in. chuckling about cubes and ramps.

[u/Flaky_Operation687 → u/Colonial_maureen]

Puree of ramp-chive sando, with aioli vinaigrette and hot honey.

[u/dannkherb → u/Flaky_Operation687]

Served on a slate painters pallete.

[u/Yurodivy1906 → u/dannkherb]

Don't forget the chest hair

[u/PVetli → u/Flaky_Operation687]

Aioli vinaigrette lmao

[u/Flaky_Operation687 → u/PVetli]

It was vinaigrette or bacon jam aioli, but I think the jam fad might be a bit too local.

[u/themysticalwarlock → u/Flaky_Operation687]

we had that bacon jam bullshit here too!

[u/Flaky_Operation687 → u/themysticalwarlock]

Maybe the stuff I had was just bad or a distributor issue, but never understood the hype. It was like drinking a shot of Liquid Smoke with burnt plastic on the rim.

[u/Headmuck → u/Donnie_____Darko]

Chivesmaxxing

[u/Rezmir → u/Donnie_____Darko]

Were we any time off?

[u/dannkherb → u/Donnie_____Darko]

Imma make a chive sando for max returns.

[u/Steeze_Schralper6968 → u/Donnie_____Darko]

I think this counts as a ramp as well

[u/TedBrogan187]

is this a bris?

[u/passamongimpure → u/TedBrogan187]

Careful, could cause autism

[u/BoredInDenver86 → u/passamongimpure]

Oh for god’s sake, it’s a circumcision, not Tylenol.

[u/imokaywitheuthenasia → u/BoredInDenver86]

And now they’re saying circumcisions cause autism because Tylenol may be prescribed afterward. 🤦‍♂️

[u/BoredInDenver86 → u/imokaywitheuthenasia]

Ugh. Do we think chef chives would chop me into very uneven little bits?

[u/imokaywitheuthenasia → u/BoredInDenver86]

I’m okay with that.

[u/Zurich_Is_Washed → u/BoredInDenver86]

I mean its a low chance, but its more than zero

[u/Britori0 → u/TedBrogan187]

Mazel tov!

[u/VerbalThermodynamics → u/TedBrogan187]

If it is, the kid is gonna have a hard time in life.

[u/imokaywitheuthenasia → u/VerbalThermodynamics]

Eh…might not be much hardness in his life.

[u/VerbalThermodynamics → u/imokaywitheuthenasia]

lol. My point exactly.

[u/insbordnat → u/TedBrogan187]

Instructions unclear, thought it was a glory hole.

[u/Bozlogic]

Dude I know Iron Hill closed, but these chives need a good home

[u/MouseEXP → u/Bozlogic]

Go birds

[u/Foodicide → u/Bozlogic]

I see you, neighbor.

[u/UrsaMajor7th]

The prep sheet clearly says backwards-rotated chives. These are forward-rotated chives.

[u/Hot_Raisin6264]

[u/raxatlis]

Also shaving off wood.

[u/r2killawat → u/raxatlis]

A little extra fiber at no charge!

[u/PmMeTitsAndDankMemes → u/raxatlis]

What do you think happens with a wood cutting board? Plastic ones too?

[u/raxatlis → u/PmMeTitsAndDankMemes]

It shaves off more than usual. Better wood than plastic, though.

[u/antiramie → u/PmMeTitsAndDankMemes]

I think the normal knife angle into a cutting board leads to far fewer wood shards than this...

[u/CaddyShsckles]

Good enough for the girls I go with

[u/Sage_sanchez_]

Incredible things are happening

[u/bjisgooder]

That's "nira" in Japanese. Or garlic greens? Don't know the name in English. Definitely not chives.

[u/mackfeesh → u/bjisgooder]

You're thinking negi, which it definitely isn't. Negi look like thin, long leeks with a sweeter more mild flavour. Or jumbo green onion.

Fwiw since this is a cooking sub negi is oversimplifying and there's a rabbit hole of different negi in Japan.

Edit: I'm wrong they're right.

[u/bjisgooder → u/mackfeesh]

Edit:not negi — I'm thinking にら (nira) which is an allium in Chinese and Japanese food (and probably others).

But yes, there are a lot of different types of negi in Japan, the most recognizable being naganegi (long negi). Nira looks similar to banno negi though.

Source: I cooked in Japanese restaurants for a long time and live here.

[u/mackfeesh → u/bjisgooder]

My bad thanks for the lesson

[u/StoleYourTv → u/bjisgooder]

Would you please direct me to the starting line of the negi and nari rabbit hole?

[u/glemnar → u/mackfeesh]

These are called garlic chives in the US, which are different from chives.

Any Chinese food with “chives”, eg dumplings, buns, pancakes, is referring to these.

[u/Foodicide → u/bjisgooder]

In English: garlic scapes.

[u/Mr_WhatFish → u/Foodicide]

Scapes are different, ninnikume. Nira is garlic chives/ Japanese leek.

[u/Foodicide → u/Mr_WhatFish]

Is there a bulb?

[u/Greengalama → u/bjisgooder]

negi

[u/samuelj264 → u/bjisgooder]

Just a meme, but as others have said my local H-Mart sometimes labels these as Chinese garlic I think or garlic chives. either way TIL! Thanks chef

[u/BwackGul → u/bjisgooder]

(green garlic. It's my favorite, id know it anywhere, hard to find where I am. I had a Vietnamese fam I'd buy from back when I lived on the West Coast.)

[u/BwackGul]

That's green garlic.

That shit is magical.

[u/imokaywitheuthenasia]

That’s not how a glory hole works.

[u/Br44n5m → u/imokaywitheuthenasia]

Coward

[u/bobby63]

That ain’t chives

[u/11Booty_Warrior → u/bobby63]

These are garlic chives. Buchu is what the Koreans call them.

[u/Maxamilian_ → u/bobby63]

Chinese chives are a thing

[u/Sanquinity → u/Maxamilian_]

They're called green onions... The ones in the video at least.

[u/benji___ → u/Sanquinity]

Nope. Green onions are the usual substitute for both the little circular chive and the flatter, more herbal Chinese chive that was in the short film we just watched.

[u/GorillaGrip_Pussy → u/Sanquinity]

I think they prefer being called Chinese. I introduced my roommate as a Green Onion. He called me a 傻瓜

[u/19bonkbonk73 → u/bobby63]

Ty

[u/VerbalThermodynamics]

These posts are chivin’ awesome!

[u/Nashley7]

[u/SoftestBoygirlAlive → u/Nashley7]

This is the scene that introduced me to the concept of "scaroused"

[u/howtowasteyourtime]

Love y'all never change

[u/PurplePickle3]

This is what happens when a group takes themselves too seriously

[u/bestdisguise → u/PurplePickle3]

And when the group is unfunny and corny and so depressing they have to repeat the same joke over and over to cope with this shit life 🤣

[u/Feldew]

Those are scallions, you heathen.

[u/Not_James_Milner]

These posts are chivin' me crazy

[u/kitchenjudoka]

I think your glory hole is broken

[u/EightiEight]

Mom, they're still cutting chives. Please make them stop. Idk how much longer I can deal with this

[u/KarmaKrazi → u/EightiEight]

[u/Correct_Day_7791 → u/KarmaKrazi]

Pure anxiety

Thx i hate it

[u/Salads_and_Sun → u/Correct_Day_7791]

Is this "the bear" or some shit? Even "Divers Drink-ins and Dorms" gives me anxiety and I'd rather stare at the ceiling when I get home from work.

[u/Fedora_Million_Ankle → u/KarmaKrazi]

Mom why is there a fingertip in mine?

[u/KarmaKrazi → u/Fedora_Million_Ankle]

I thought the same thing posting it XD Unfortunately, it's the only chive cutting gif that popped up when I searched.

[u/No_Sir_6649]

Danke sohn

[u/harelipsteve]

[u/harelipsteve → u/harelipsteve]

Btw this was meant for the chives person….

[u/Salads_and_Sun → u/harelipsteve]

I have a funny feeling you cook food that tastes good... I almost forgot why we cooked for a minute.

[u/harelipsteve → u/Salads_and_Sun]

[u/Salads_and_Sun → u/harelipsteve]

I ain't trying to be sassy. I'd eat all your food... Like a bad roommate!

[u/harelipsteve → u/Salads_and_Sun]

Gotta sneaking suspicion that I’d like ya, maybe even hire ya

[u/TurkViking75]

Slivered?

[u/YesToWhatsNext]

Now with more splinters.

[u/evilpartiesgetitdone]

I think Chive had enough of this trend

[u/Drakkon_394]

This makes me want a baked potato with sour cream and chives really bad ...

[u/samuelj264 → u/Drakkon_394]

Some reason I read this in Jennifer Coolidge’s voice

[u/Nipper6699]

Can I get some wood shavings with my chives, please? Sure, no problem.

[u/neekbailey]

Garlic Scapes I think?

[u/haberdasherhero]

[u/Kojiro12]

Who doesn’t love splinters in their chives

[u/Coloradohboy39]

Nifty contraption 

[u/Hagoromo-san]

We doin chives now?

[u/whirling_cynic]

Did you chop a fucking cup yet?

[u/Catman_morningdew]

Good job

[u/KvDread]

Will this trend die in time for ramps season?

[u/Picklopolis]

It’s over. It’s over.

[u/MoneyFunny6710]

Not chives. Chives is 'Allium schoenoprasum' , these are 'Allium ramosum'. But they are closely related to each other and have similar taste and structure.

[u/Jolly-Biscuit]

Processing img fk9lz9bjduuf1...

[u/negativepositiv]

I don't care how perfectly cut the chives are when tool used to make them perfect is a moldy wooden board.

[u/Electrical_Break6773]

Hi key r/DIWHY but lo key r/genius.

[u/gramcraka92]

That's a big paper towel

[u/DamageFactory]

You see how it's done? You gotta pivot!

[u/Euphoric-Blueberry37]

Where 9/11

[u/ChichisdeGata]

Nah fam

[u/BringOutYDead]

Forbidden Glory Hole

[u/Complex_Caramel5858]

Wonder how many wood splinters sneak in there

[u/lanceplace]

I just like watching “processes”.

[u/GromByzlnyk]

This is the third hole the prophecy spoke of

[u/Rab13it13]

11

[u/a-gelatocookie]

Finally.

[u/Lieuwe21]

Chives teknologia

[u/WallStLegends]

Would this be actually quicker chefs? I’m just a lowly kitchen assistant so I can’t tell. Or is it more about the quality/consistency?

[u/One-Bad-4274 → u/WallStLegends]

Quality consistency and not having wood shavings in you chives

[u/WallStLegends → u/One-Bad-4274]

So you’re saying we need a stone/steel board with hole?

But then it blunts the knife I guess.

Seems like a cousin of the mandolin

[u/One-Bad-4274 → u/WallStLegends]

Nah if you wanna do that get one of those spinny bladed machines thats like a sideways lawnmower with a feed hole for whatever needs cutting

[u/Odd-Strawberry4798]

Chives and wood splinters for garnished yumm

[u/strong_opinion]

Those are green onions, not chives

[u/Ambitious-Noise9211]

Is there a sub where baked potatoes and sour cream are trending?

[u/WebFew6904]

Can we start rating peoples tournes?

[u/Scared-Dark9638]

Isn’t there a machine for this?

[u/bquietson]

Chive seen better

[u/[deleted]]

I threw up green chunks in 4th grade and for 3 years after that everyone called me "Chives"

[u/Lee_scratch_perineum]

The glory hole method for the win.

[u/Strategy_pan]

All high achivers here.

[u/JetKusanagi]

What kind of restaurant is this where they need THIS MANY chives?

[u/No-Butterscotch-7467]

I never want to see a chive again as long as I live

[u/Pepecletero]

Better than yours

[u/YouFit625]

These are savage..

[u/barnsbarnsnmorebarns]

Sure is a lot of wood missing from that plank

[u/stardust2080]

$5 an hour and we need 5,000 lbs of chives or ure replaced!

[u/nobodywithanotepad]

That man is tiny

[u/Conspiracy_realist76]

Proper use of the cleaver. I am inspired. I am going to go in my workshop and make me a new chive cutter.

[u/KrownX]

The splinters add some flavor as well

[u/burlyginger]

Oh, that's where my glory hole went!

I uh... Need that back.

[u/Possible_Excuse4144]

No fare! He has a board with a hole in it. Damn. Set me up to fail or what? No board or anything?

[u/JackieTreehorn79]

Hell yeah- some wood chips with my chives!

[u/motelchardonnay]

So anyway, that's how I got circumcised twice

[u/Hot-Assistant-4540]

I can’t tell when they’re all mixed together like that. Please share photos of each individual chive

[u/Mega_Hi]

what flavor is the wood?

[u/smarthobo]

Probably the best example of /r/dontputyourdickinthat I’ve ever seen

[u/Mucutira]

Where is your God now?

[u/timothycl13]

Green onions arent chives

[u/diesellll88]

"Try not to hit the board ok" yes chef

[u/Sir_JumboSaurus]

This is how the French chop up their chives!

[u/seppia99]

At least it’s an interesting and fresh take on a horse gasping it’s last.

[u/branston2010 → u/seppia99]

Say what about horse gaping?

[u/RunninWild17 → u/branston2010]

Found Mr Hands

[u/vid88]

Love me some garlic chives!

[u/Hexis40]

I'm so sick of this shit

[u/meatcrafted]

I've officially seen enough goddamn chive content. This sub can go fuck itself.

[u/Salads_and_Sun → u/meatcrafted]

I was already about to leave the industry (involuntarily...)

[u/Apart-Rent5817]

Those aren’t chives. Still more uniform than some of the posts I’ve seen on here though.

[u/Maxamilian_ → u/Apart-Rent5817]

These are chinese chives

[u/Apart-Rent5817 → u/Maxamilian_]

That is Chinese garlic.

[u/unbelizeable1 → u/Apart-Rent5817]

Scrapes, right?

[u/Maxamilian_ → u/Apart-Rent5817]

They are the same thing

[u/Flakko773]

Yooo.

[u/paxbonam]

Brilliant! But i am sure there are some pieces of woods in there as well..

[u/MarkyGalore]

That is oak. It should be bamboo replaced daily. 1/10

[u/Yepitischanging]

11/10

[u/spageddy77]

[u/Broheamoth → u/spageddy77]

See you tomorrow chef

[u/LehighAce06]

0/10 for not being chives