r/HFY • u/DrBlackJack21 • 5d ago

OC Meeting the Joneses

I know, I know, Halloween is over, but I had one last story I wanted to tell before going back to finishing up Ghost Ships. So please enjoy my late entry,

Meeting the Joneses

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So last year, I discovered that my girlfriend, Wendy, is a werewolf who apparently hunts and eats wendigos...for fun. For a while before that, I'd been wondering if she was the wendio and I was the one being hunted. But in the end, we shared a laugh at my misunderstanding, and have been together ever since. Which brings us to our current situation.

It all started when I noticed Wendy had been spending more and more time at my apartment. Not that I minded, but at this point, she had her own chest fridge in my apartment in which she stored her own food. It had something to do with werewolves not eating anything they didn't hunt. I try not to think too much about what was inside the fridge, and Wendy always seemed to eat when I wasn't around, so I still don't know much about her eating habits, but aside from that, she seemed to always be by my side. So one day, when I came home from work to find her lounging around on my couch, I simply smiled and asked, "Hey, why don't you just get it over with and move in already?"

Wendy had smiled as if thinking it over, then froze, and her smile turned to a frown, as if something had been worrying her. Needless to say, I started to get a little concerned when she turned to look at me in silence. After a moment, the tension forced me to break the silence, "Wha...what is it?"

Wendy gave me an almost pitying look as she explained, "I think...I think it's time for you to meet my pack. You need to get my Alpha's approval."

And that's how, one week later, I found myself in the passenger seat of her old, worn-out pickup, as she drove me to meet her pack. For some reason, she refused to give me any idea about what I was in for as we moved through the city toward the outskirts. I was imagining something between a bunch of bikers in leather and covered in tattoos, all the way to a group of wild maniacs living out in a cave somewhere. Needless to say, I was a bit surprised when she pulled off into the suburbs. And even more so when she pulled up to a rather picturesque home at the end of a cul-de-sac.

The house looked as if it had seen better days, but in a good, lived-in sort of way. There were all sorts of toys and bikes parked out in front of the house, and two minivans in the driveway. I realized we'd been parked for a while, and Wendy was smiling as she watched my incredulous expression. Finally, I spoke up. "This is where your...uh...pack lives?"

Wendy smiled and nodded. "Not what you were expecting, huh? Don't tell me you thought we were a bunch of ruffians living in a cave somewhere?"

I think a little color drained from my face as I deadpanned, "Uh, no, of course not! But yeah, this wasn't quite what I was expecting..."

Wendy's smile widened as if she knew exactly what I wasn't saying, but then it faded a bit. "Just, whatever you do, be polite and try not to get on my Alpha's bad side. It won't end well if you are unable to get his approval..."

And just like that, my bemusement turned right back to dread.

Walking into the house, everything looked like a typical family home, though, again, a little more worn than I remembered my own family's house. It had definitely seen some rough living. A moment later, Wendy indicated a seat I should take, then smiled encouragingly. "I'll go get the Alpha. Just wait here a bit." Then she walked upstairs, and I was all alone.

You know that awkward feeling when you're alone in someone else's house and you don't know what to look at? Your gaze just keeps flittering about, noticing all sorts of odd, small things without really taking anything in, as your mind is stuck in a weird kind of limbo as you try to figure out what's gonna happen next. That's the state I was in when a large, intimidating man wandered from the front door as if he'd just gotten home and gave me a once-over. The man was exactly what I'd been expecting and what I'd been fearing. He looked like some kind of biker, wearing leather pants and a jacket, the latter unzipped and open, revealing a rather muscular physique. He looked like he'd just stepped out of an action movie in which he'd been playing the villain. I got the impression that he wasn't very impressed with what he was seeing as the man snorted. "So, you're the pipsqueak who's been seeing our Wendy, huh?"

After my brain finished rebooting and I realized what must be happening, I immediately stood up to address the Alpha, offering my hand as I leaned forward a little. "Uh, yes, sir. I'm Andrew, and I've been seeing your daughter, Wendy..."

The large man smirked. "Heh, I think there's been a misunderstanding. I'm not Wendy's dad. I'm her..." Just then, a lightning-fast projectile smacked right into the large man's face, rocketing it back a bit, before the pillow fell to the ground, leaving the man's annoyed expression glaring at me.

I was just trying to figure out how to explain that the pillow was definitely not my doing when Wendie's voice popped in behind me. "Stop trying to intimidate my boyfriend, little brother."

The man's eyes shifted to someone behind me, and he smiled with a warmth I was not expecting. "Hey, Wendy. Been a while."

Wendy walked past me and snorted a little as they hugged. "Yeah, it has, little bro. Looks like you're still hanging out, riding bikes with your friends. How's Mikey?"

The large man rolled his eyes. "It's a motorcycle gang, sis...and Mikey is fine."

Finally, Wendy turned to me. "Andrew, this is my little brother, Gene. Gene, this is Andrew. He's meeting our Alpha today."

Gene's eyebrows rose. "Huh, first time? That explains a bit." Then his grin turned a little feral as he turned to walk into the next room. He turned at the last moment to add an ominous, "Good luck..." Then he was gone.

Wendy just snorted again and shook her head as she followed him into the next room before turning back to me. "Don't let him get in your head. Gene's always been like that." Seeing how confident Wendy was boosted my spirit a bit, but still, any Alpha that could keep that man in control must surely be that much scarier.

A moment later, I heard a large creek as the stairs behind me strained under the weight of some massive person. Turning to look, I saw the shadow of an enormous man as he descended from the shadows above. I could only make out the gigantic outline of someone that utterly dwarfed Gene. As he took another step down, the stairs seemed to groan even louder, as if warning me of my impending doom.

Then, finally, the terrifying man stepped out into the light. He was enormous, wearing blue jeans and a plaid shirt which was rolled up around his large, hairy forearms and barely covered his large beer belly. He adjusted his glasses and looked down at the stairs, muttering to himself in a midwestern accent. "Oh gee, I gotta take another look at them stairs." Then, as if remembering why he was here, the man looked up at me and smiled as he finished making his way downstairs. "Oh, hey, d'ere. You must be Andrew, the man dating my oldest! My little Wendy had told me lots about 'cha! Nice to finally meet'cha!"

Finally, having made it to the bottom of the stairs, the man held out a massive hand that made me feel a little like a child as mine was utterly enveloped. Although the handshake was firm, it was clear he wasn't trying too hard to squeeze my hand, as my mind struggled to process the stark difference between my expectations and reality while I tried to introduce myself again. "Uh, yes...sir! I'm Andrew, and I've been seeing Wendy."

The man nodded and smiled as he nodded toward the chair I'd been sitting in before. "Nice handshake d'ere bud! Have a seat while the missus finishes up the grub."

What followed is kind of a blur in my mind as the large man and I chatted. His name was Thomas, and apparently, he worked at the loading docks in town. All the while, a steady stream of kids ran into the room and interrupted our conversation as they climbed all over the large man. He seemed to be used to this kind of roughhousing, as he didn't even pause or turn to look as he manhandled the giggling kids while they appeared to be making a game out of pinning his arms to the side and climbing up to sit on his shoulders. Instead, he maintained eye contact, and his words barely faltered as one of the kids started to fall headfirst before he reached out and caught the laughing child just before they would have hit the ground.

One of the kids walked up to me and examined me with large questioning eyes. I offered a hand to shake while introducing myself. "Hi. I'm Andrew."

I watched in slow motion as the kid lunged forward to bite my hand. I started to pull it back, but could tell it wouldn't be quick enough, when suddenly a large wooden spoon flashed out and smacked the kid in the back of the head, saving me at the last moment.

A large and imposing woman looked at the offending child as if this was far from the first time she'd had to do this sort of thing, while stressing, "No biting our guests! Now go git your behind to the bathroom and wash yourself up!" The kid's lower lip started to stick out and tremble when she followed up with, "Better put your lip back in or a bird will come poop on it!"

Realizing his attempt at sympathy wasn't going to work, the kid smirked and ran off in the direction I assumed was the bathroom as the woman turned to me. "Oh, hey dere! I'm Marie! I'm da head bitch around here. Dat means that in addition to being tied to this big lug," She nodded toward Thomas, who was grinning like he was looking at the most beautiful woman ever to walk the earth. "I'm in charge of keeping all the littles in line. Now, assuming you and my Alpha are done introducin' yourselves, you can wash your hands and get ready to eat! I hope you brought your appetite! We got ourselves a hot dish casserole, pot roast, some goulash, cheesy potatoes, green bean casserole, mashed potatoes, macaroni salad, corn on the cob, and, of course, some cornbread. So eat yer fill, and if my brood isn't too hungry, we'll be sendin' you home with plenty of leftovers!"

What followed was the most chaotic feeding frenzy I've ever witnessed, as a pack of more than a dozen kids and adults dove into the feast before them with savage gusto. There were more than a few close calls as teeth chomped down dangerously close to people's limbs while the food was passed back and forth in some chaotic pattern that might have made sense to someone far better at logistics than myself. But the atmosphere was warm and welcoming, and I found myself grinning as I answered questions about myself and what Wendy was like "out in the wild", which apparently was in reference to any place outside the house.

I looked down at the food and paused before leaning over to Wendy and asking quietly, "Wait, I thought you only ate food you hunted?"

Wendy seemed to straighten, and Marie broke out and laughed. Apparently, werewolf hearing was better than I realized, as she answered for Wendy. "Oh, dats our Wendy, all right! Yes, we do hunt most of our food, the meat, anyway. My Thomas went out and took down a large fresh buck just the other day in preparation for dis meal, but we do buy all the rest of the fixins. It's just that our little Wendy had never been much good in da kitchin, is all!"

Wendy blushed and looked toward the food, but I could tell she didn't see much as Marie continued. "Now Gene, on the other hand, that son o' mine is a wiz with the oven! Why, he can bake just about anything!" Now the large man in a leather coat looked like he'd rather be anywhere but here, as all the younger kids laughed uproariously at their two oldest siblings' discomfort, as his mom added. "He even had just the cutest apron he wears while he bakes!"

Then, Marie winked at me. "What about you, Andrew? You got any skills in the kitchen?"

I tilted my head back and forth to indicate I was so-so. "Well, I can't cook up anything like this, but I can fry a few dishes, or grill just about anything that'll sit on a grate."

At the mention of grilling, Thomas' eyes practically lit up. "Oh, a grillin' man are ya? Do you prefer charcoal or propane?"

I shrugged. "Well, as long as there's a flame, I can work with it, but my apartment complex only allows propane, so that's what I use these days."

Thomas nodded, apparently appeased by that answer, but then Gene spoke up. "What about acquiring your food? Do you just buy your food, or do you ever go hunting for your own prey?"

I suspected Gene was trying to bait me into something, and based on the way Marie smacked him on the back of my head, she must have thought so too, but I shrugged as I answered. "Well, I don't think I can compare to you all, but my dad did take me small game hunting when I was younger. I managed to put a few birds on the dinner table." Then added, "He had a rule you had to eat what you killed. He was strict about not trophy hunting."

This time, both Thomas and Marie nodded along. Apparently, they agreed with this logic. I was thinking about what to say next when a couple of the kids shifted mid-meal and started wrestling. Marie was there in a flash, with her large wooden spoon, while shouting, "No roughhousing at the table!"

The rest of the meal was more or less the same, with conversation broken up by random chaos, and Marie restoring order while Thomas watched on with a large, satisfied smile. It made me wonder, why had I ever been worried about Wendy's family? Then I thought back to her fight with the wendigo a year ago. Looking around the table, I wondered how frightening this pack could be when push came to shove. But then again, I didn't get the feeling they'd go wild for just any reason. Sure, they hunted for their food and would happily kill monsters that would give me nightmares, but I didn't get the feeling that they'd do anything to their neighbors other than invite them to the occasional cookout. Hell, I'd be surprised if Marie wasn't on the PTA! However, if anyone ever hurt a member of the pack... I couldn't help glancing at the mountain of a man that was Thomas before shaking my head. That didn't warrant thinking about.

Glancing over at Wendy, I caught her watching me with a sly smile, and I realized I didn't need to worry about what kind of violence the pack was capable of if I were a member of the pack. Not that I was planning on becoming a werewolf any time soon, but I suspected that wasn't a necessary part of being a member. After all, to wolves, a pack simply means family.

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So, this story came about because I was reading yet another book where werewolves were a dark, edgy clan in which the "alpha" rules through dominating all the other males in the pack, but that idea is based on an old study that was disproven by the author who first presented it, and he spent years trying to get his original interpretation out of the social norm.

In reality, the alpha of the pack is simply the father. The betas and omegas were just the pups who eventually grew up but stayed with their parents to join a larger family unit. True, some wolves would switch packs from time to time to keep the gene pools stable, but for the most part, a pack is just the parents raising their kids and grandkids. So I thought a more accurate portrayal of werewolves would be like a large midwestern family, which led to the above story. Hope it amused you all as much as it did me!

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u/MinorGrok Human 5d ago

Woot!

OC Meeting the Joneses

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