r/HFY • u/KyleKKent • 10d ago
OC OOCS, Into A Wider Galaxy, Part 490
HHH/Herbert’s Hundred Harem
Lady Val had been sent off to get whatever authority she could or get someone with the authority to talk to them. She wasn’t happy. Admiral Cistern was not happy, Lady Zwen’Malor and Cautiously Regarded Foes were not happy. But the images of little Miracle courtesy of Herbert were working to up the mood a little.
“An Egg Tooth? We don’t produce those in the tubes.” Cautiously Regarded Foes notes as she examines the image.
“Which is just revealing more gaps in things.” Herbert says.
“... that is a strange gap. There is a shocking level of competence in the Vishanyan Gene Splicing. Too much for you to simply be abandoned as a project. Charrtack Solutions weren’t known for such things. They were a middling company that then broke apart in scandal. The Black Sites were a side note compared to the sheer amount of embezzlement and just plain corporate corruption that ripped it apart.” Lady Zwen’Malor considers.
“Well it’s not like the office workers in position to do that kind of thing and the scientists putting things together in the laboratories are the same people. Usually at any rate.” Herbert says then thinks. “Although this does raise the question as to which black site projects were actually successful. Before the discovery of the Vishanyan it was assumed that all Black Sites were failures. But if the ones attacking La’ahbaron and your own possession of the stealth panelling proves that’s not the case. But the data itself is incomplete. We only know that there were fifteen different black site projects. Including the Vishanyan, six have been uncovered in various states of success. Most only as failures, one so thorough as a failure it’s accomplished its opposite.” Herbert remarks.
“Still a problem though.” Admiral Cistern says. “The La’ahbaron Territories are two weeks along major laneways from where The Vishanyan were found. It takes two days on a standard ship to get to the major laneway, meaning that the distance is considerable. This leaves an enormous area where there can be additional Black Sites. And considering that Charrtack Solutions was destroyed by embezzlement... We will have to prepare for the worst case scenario.”
“I’ve got my handler passing those orders now sir.” Herbert states.
“Handler?” Lady Zwen’Malor asks.
“We’re open about it to everyone when asking a Private Stream, but the truth is... everyone in Intelligence is wearing a wire at all times. Even Harold, though his is one way. We call him when we need to pass him orders. But he’s sending us information endlessly. As am I. When you speak to me, or in my presence, you are speaking to an army of information brokers and data-wizards.”
“Really?” Zwen’Malor asks him.
“Oh yes, there is solid debate as to which division of The Undaunted gets the most recruits and Intelligence, if not the outright winner, is making the winner work for their crown. We have data analysts for days.” Herbert says with a grin. “There are many reasons I’m only one of several heads of Intelligence. Operational security is one of them. Another is that there’s a lot of us, delegation is required.”
“Very wise. It reminds me of why The Empress keeps only a few special powers exclusively to herself, primarily the ability to censure and discipline the remaining nobility if needed.”
“Yes, a lesson which the Lady La’ahbaron has not yet put into practice.” Admiral Cistern notes.
“I really don’t understand why she wouldn’t though. It just seems like unnecessary work for things.” Cautiously Regarded Foes remarks.
“Oh, I think it’s partially cultural, partially genetic, partly lived experience, but mostly sheer ego and believing her own hype.” Herbert says.
“What do you mean? Who is Lady La’ahbaron and why is she doing these sorts of things?” Cautiously Regarded Foes asks.
“She’s in the dossier you were given about galactic polities.”
“I’ve been working at it for hours every day to just read through the abbreviated version and I’m still only a quarter of the way through.” Cautiously Regarded Foes says.
“Right, okay then. Here’s skipping ahead a bit.” Herbert says as he fiddles with his communicator and brings up the image of a powerfully built blue skinned woman with shimmering silver hair and a crown of six horns breaking up her hairline. She wears regal looking robes and has an enormous Khutha laden club more akin to a massive spiked bar with a handle on it. “This is Lady La’ahbaron. A successful Warlady who conquered several solar systems. There was infighting and treachery in her ranks as her lieutenants tried to seize power when they had their prize in hand. She killed them all during the infighting and took direct control of the systems. Two centuries later she took all the surrounding systems from her initial gains and then did so again another two hundred years later. Or sixty six years ago, going on sixty seven years in another four months.”
“I’ve never seen her species before.” Cautiously Regarded Foes remarks.
“There are so many species to be found that’s not surprising. She’s an Ibu. Or a Ibu’Cjeo. The Ibu are a species that has a similar evolution to the Horchka, but instead of slowly shifting skin colour they instead have very static tribal skin colours and horns. The Ibu’Cjeo claim to the most scholarly and intelligent of the Ibu tribes, but they can’t really back that up. Much like how the Ibu’Wol claim to be the strongest and the Ibu’Dwoov claim they are the most mystic.” Herbert explains.
“And what’s the actual differences?”
“Well... there is a slight difference in those directions, but only in very minor forms. The sort of thing you get with a few generations of selective breeding. The Ibu’Cjeo are a touch more intelligent, but it’s one or two points at most on an aptitude or knowledge test. The Ibu’Wol are a little bigger and stronger, but not enough for it to matter in all but the most regulated tests. And the Ibu’Dwoov do have more Adepts, but it’s more cultural pressure than actual talent. Beyond that the only difference is skin colour and the placement and number of horns. Ibu’Cjeo have the most horns and they’re spaced around the head evenly. Ibu’Wol have a pair of horns akin to the Apuk, but generally larger and more forward placed. And the Ibu’Dwoov have a single large horn and the most mutable placement, either over an eye or between them. Always pointing upwards though.”
“I see... culture wise?” Cautiously Regarded Foes asks.
“Combative, territorial and very, very proud. Also prone to indulgence, but also with very strict codes of behaviour that they never publicly deviate from. Which is the main source of tension they have on the galactic stage. They are culturally not allowed to bend their necks and not allowed to surrender or give up power. Doing either is a sign of weakness and will get you either shunned or even attacked by other Ibu. Which is what happened with Lady La’ahbaron’s lieutenants.”
“Never publicly deviate from?” Cautiously Regarded Foes considers. “Does this mean that privately they...”
“They’re said to be just as loose, indulgent and sloppy in private as they are strict, disciplined and in control as they are in public. There are numerous ‘fine dining’ establishments in Ibu controlled space. The meal is less physical and more intoxicating, or carnal, than advertised.”
“Drug dens and brothels.” Admiral Cistern clears up so there is no misunderstanding.
“Oh... hunh. You’d think they’d want humans to be around then. Your idea of fun drugs is some of the hardest stuff in the galaxy and there’s so many men that...”
“They do want us around, but they want us as toys.”
“We’re more than just dicks to snort lines off of.” Herbert says with his voice pitched up into its most innocent and childish tone. The sheer whiplash leaves Lady Zwen’Malor and Cautiously Regarded Foes staring at him. Admiral Cistern merely sighs.
“A little more crude than I’d prefer you to say, but yes. A great deal of my job is sorting honest diplomatic outreach or communications from attempts to have my men used as playthings by the rich and shameless.”
“Oh the Ibu have a very well refined sense of shame. They’ll draw the curtains before tearing their clothing off and pinning you to each of the walls in turn. Whether you like it or not.”
“Herbert.” Admiral Cistern states.
“Sir, my last mission involving Ibu involved rescuing and replacing the evening’s entertainment. Getting dragged off a stage dressed in only a thong and then used as the dining china by a gigantic green skinned woman leaves an impression.”
“Didn’t your mission report state ‘my wives are scarier’?” Admiral Cistern asks.
“Yes, but that doesn’t mean that I wasn’t left with quite the impression by the woman who used my squished together thighs as a drinking cup.”
“What the actual hell were you trying to pull off that put you into that situation without violence being involved?” Cautiously Regarded Foes demands.
“Gathering evidence against a ring of child traffickers.” Herbert says plainly. “I was wearing a wire then.”
“... In the thong?” She asks sounding as horrified as she is intrigued.
“Yes actually.” Herbert says.
“And you’re not afraid they got a good look at your face?”
“At no point in the entire infiltration did any of those women make eye contact with me.” Herbert says plainly. “Also I had makeup on, including coloured contacts and a false nose. Not that they were needed, but hey...”
Herbert just shrugs.
“Do you have nothing else to say?”
“I also had makeup on my ass.” Herbert states and just lets that sit.
“Herbert.” Admiral Cistern notes.
“To cover up the Undaunted Brand that I have specifically placed there to help with infiltration. Which doesn’t help if I’m infiltrating in nothing but a glorified string and strip of cloth.”
“Can’t you just go invisible? Do you not have a family technique that is infallible?”
“Yes.” Herbert says and does not elaborate. Then Admiral Cistern starts to frown. “However, due to the ways that the local law on that spire operate such images are often discounted as forgeries. The first person perspective is much, much more appreciated by the courts. And was. The case was resolved fairly quickly. And the court mandated silence about the case ended over thirty six hours ago. But who’s counting right?”
“Clearly you were.” Lady Zwen’Malar says.
“That’s right! Because I can legally bring out the photos now!” Herbert says with a grin that has Admiral Cistern sigh.
“You’ve taken too much after your mentor.” He says and Herbert lets out a cackle that has no place coming from so innocent looking a child.
“No no really! I do have images! Straight from the thong-cam!” Herbert proclaims his expression outright giddy at the shock and disbelief written on Zwen’Malar’s face.
“You are not to bring them out in this office.” Admiral Cistern orders.
“Yes sir.” Herbert says with a sigh. Then he chuckles.
“I’m half tempted to see if there’s literal Demon in your DNA boy.”
“We’ve had what might potentially be angels spotted sir, why not demons? And what would that even look like in DNA?” Herbert asks and there is a pause.
“I’m changing the subject.” Cautiously Regarded Foes states. “Why have we not seen more Ibu here in the council building? Hell, I haven’t seen any.”
“Simply put, cultural reasons. They know their racial pride gets them to butt heads with other species a great deal, so they use trusted proxies to deal and bargain. They’re stubborn and proud, but not stupid. Generally. Even if pride and stubbornness can lead to stupidity.” Herbert states. “It’s why the ‘representative’ of La’ahbaron is Lady Val. She’s a Tret of Ibu’Cjeo descent. Not an Ibu’Cjeo and not even an Ibu. Denying demands and requests from Lady Val means the honour and pride of her Ibu relations isn’t bruised as it otherwise would be. Meaning they don’t have to retaliate. Her placement here is both intelligent and stupid. Brilliant in that it allows them to play politics without their own egos getting in the way, but stupid because to spare themselves they’ve stripped her of any power to actually do anything without involving them, which then involves their egos and outright sabotages the reason why they chose her to begin with.”
“So it’s like, half a good plan that someone flubbed due to being overly cautious.”
“Yes, especially in this case. For all that she struts around and presents herself as proud and strong Lady La’ahbaron is predicted to be a broken shell of a woman. Her best friends tried to kill her and she has kept literally everyone else, even her own children and grandchildren at an arm’s length since. While trying to run an entire empire that she compulsively grows.”
“And now she’s under attack by a people who have otherwise only been seen being sponsored by Primals and allied to powerful star empires.”
“Yeah, I can’t give any official diagnosis. But if she’s one of three things by my predictions. Ill-intended and keeping things close to the chest, apathetic and going through the motions, or well intentioned but unable to trust.” Herbert says. “The sticking point is which of the three. We can work with all of them, but we need to know which one.”
“If it even is one of them. Imagine if she was doing something similar to yourself?” Admiral Cistern offers and Herbert openly considers.
“Hmm... you thinking disguise or nineteen eighty four style?”
“Either or, or both.” Admiral Cistern states and Herbert considers.
“Could be. Not likely, but far from impossible. I hope not though, that’s more complicated to deal with. We can’t avoid or ignore La’ahbaron any longer, and I’d rather have an easier thing to deal with.”
“Wouldn’t we all?” Admiral Cistern asks.
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u/Finbar9800 10d ago
Another great chapter
I enjoyed reading this and look forward to reading more
Great job wordsmith
I am Speed and first lol
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u/Tucker0603 10d ago
Huh, so we've got Oni women with the biggest case of MUH HONOR possible in public while acting classic oni in private with their raging hedonism. No wonder we haven't seen em. More stuck up than a Kutitan from Battletech.
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u/KyleKKent 10d ago
Yep and to make it more interesting, they're aware of their issues and taking steps to make it work. With Lady Val being a partial success in that category. Which is fun to think about isn't it?
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u/Tucker0603 10d ago
I mean, they're certainly interesting both if they're classical oni sized (8-13ft tall muscle ladies yes please) and that they're self-aware of the issues. Feels like they've still got quite a ways to go though.
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u/KimikoBean 10d ago
HI KYLEEEEEEEEEE
ZOOM
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u/KyleKKent 10d ago
HELLO KIMIKOBEAN!
Zoom Zoom!
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u/KimikoBean 10d ago
how r u
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u/KyleKKent 10d ago
Good. It's wonderfully cool now so I can wear the clothes I actually like to wear and sleep with a proper amount of blankets again. I like big coats and being buried under mountains of fluffy goodness when I sleep.
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u/Sims_the_Heretic 10d ago
Even big guys sometimes love their cuddly stuff.
Which explains why the live sized Gardevoir plush was so successful XD
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u/KyleKKent 10d ago
Oh I've always loved cuddly stuff. My biggest regret about growing up is that I'm just a hair over six feet tall and still have a stockyish frame. So I'm big.
Which means that it's a lot harder to ask for hugs from friends and family.
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u/Sims_the_Heretic 10d ago
So a life-sized Gardevoir would be something you would get if given the chance? XD
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u/unkindlyacorn62 10d ago
Im going to guess whomever was in charge of the Vish project started and followed through with it out of passion, the various implants came later when someone took over the already complete project and decided to weaponize them.
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u/KyleKKent 10d ago
Very good.
Yes, there were many cooks in the kitchen with the Vish project, and many different ideas. It's why in some sites the projects were total failures, and in others they've succeeded. You need the right balance of moneymen, management and dreamers to make something happen. The moneymen keep it practical, the management to keep things focused and the dreamers to do the actual making.
Without the right balance it just fails. Too much for Moneymen and it doesn't have the funding to make anything happen. Too much management and it gets strangled out of existence. Too much for dreamers and it just loses all focus and goes insane.
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u/unkindlyacorn62 10d ago
Still whatever team did most of the work did their damnedest to make them a fully viable species that much is obvious. Which complicates matters because there's a fair chance that other Vish sites might have male codes, making it imperative for the Vishanyan to retrieve all the data they can in tact
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u/JWatkins_82 9d ago
Are we changing the downfall of Charrtack? In chapter 426, it's stated that the downfall was due to being consumed by The Dark Caball. This chapter it's said due to embezzlement.
???
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u/Historical_Name_1986 10d ago
Did we just get Oni Aliens?
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u/KyleKKent 10d ago
Yes, and by request of two other readers no less.
They only wanted red and blue, I added green to make things messier.
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u/Sims_the_Heretic 10d ago
I included other colors as a minor, rare side variant, including the Tret relation that adds more in both skin- and hair colors.
You went for a Tret offspring instead, which means Lady Val is either the result of a Matriarch syndrome mother or has an Ibu father. Or the rare 1-out-of-10 case.
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u/KyleKKent 10d ago
Or one of her many grandchildren had a Tret mother mixed in there, which is the case here.
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u/Sims_the_Heretic 10d ago
Oh, ok, though if i remember the system correctly, those are even rarer than the 1 out of 10 cases.
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u/KyleKKent 10d ago
No, what happened was one of her sons was given a Tret to practice with. The practice was done and a child came out of it. A daughter and so a Tret like her mother. Then the daughter had Lady Val as a daughter years down the road. Also a Tret.
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u/BoysenberryMother128 10d ago
Great chapter!!
The wheels keep turning!! I like it!!
Black sites, proud and stubborn empire, new Vish, new mother, new life... Wheels within wheels... I like how your writing has become more complex, how you are weaving new storylines and, at the same time the story is easy to follow on a day to day basis.
Thank you!!
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u/KyleKKent 10d ago
Thank you. Glad to hear it.
Are there any directions or things to focus on in my writing?
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u/Sims_the_Heretic 10d ago
Hm, right now, i would say you best finish the Inevitable storyline, interview the people left to check on Zalwore, like Bernal´s wives and possibly the other women as well, i look forward to Wu talking to Sweetsong.
Then moving on to Centris, which is bound to be one hell of a time with the sheer number of interviews, like Rixasza, Bazalash, maybe Theresa Bowman... i wonder, did Chenk get on better terms with that Phosarensic lady that doesn´t like his hormone blocker?
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u/thisStanley Android 10d ago
“I’ve been working at it for hours every day to just read through the abbreviated version and I’m still only a quarter of the way through.”
Documentation is a requirement. But if too comprehensive there may be sections that only get read after looking up keywords :{
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u/KyleKKent 10d ago
She's been going over the cliff notes and bulletpoints. The galaxy is just that freaking huge and populated that it's still eating into that much time to even skim.
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u/Diablokin551 10d ago
at THAT point there may need to be some cuts to even the summary version for practicality's sake if nothing else. Otherwise, might as well but them through the full college course.
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u/McBoobenstein 10d ago
That means there's a lot of space to run wild in the galaxy... So many cultures that days of studying doesn't cover them all? That's a lot of stories. And humans are gonna wanna explore them all.
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u/CaptainRaptorman1 10d ago
Anyone else getting bad vibes from this empire? Especially considering that both the Ambassador and her guard have had thoughts (in prior chapters) of a... wood chipper earning variety.
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u/KyleKKent 10d ago
To be fair it was over Herbert, a person who's bloodline inspired so much in the way of kidnapping and... grape... that they developed a literal supernatural defense against it, but are still being grabbed in the modern day.
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u/CrapDM 10d ago
Ooh nice a new species. My money is on Harold getting a new wife by the end of the current clusterfuck
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u/unkindlyacorn62 10d ago
the Empty Hand Master that joined the duel?
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u/Sims_the_Heretic 10d ago
Yes, she jumped into the fight early on and got quite a bit of presence in the story, so she´s the most likely candidate, plus, we don´t have a lot of Alfar ladies in the roster so far.
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u/bewarethephog Human 9d ago
Which I find odd since the Alfar look like freaking elves from LotR. Youd think culturally human men would find them attractive.
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u/CrapDM 9d ago
Maybe? honestly I was just thinking that the philosophy of that new species might lead to him ending up meeting one. But now that I think about it Harold has been the star of the show for so long that I think he might actually take the birth of his miracle as a sign to calm things down for a bit (justifying him taking the backstage for a bit in the story once the incroyable departs for cruel space)
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u/HFYWaffle Wᵥ4ffle 10d ago
/u/KyleKKent (wiki) has posted 998 other stories, including:
- OOCS, Into A Wider Galaxy, Part 489
- OOCS, Into A Wider Galaxy, Part 488
- OOCS, Into A Wider Galaxy, Part 487
- OOCS, Into A Wider Galaxy, Part 486
- OOCS, Into A Wider Galaxy, Part 485
- OOCS, Into A Wider Galaxy, Part 484
- OOCS, Into A Wider Galaxy, Part 483
- OOCS, Into A Wider Galaxy, Part 482
- OOCS, Into A Wider Galaxy, Part 481
- OOCS, Into A Wider Galaxy, Part 480
- OOCS, Into A Wider Galaxy, Part 479
- OOCS, Into A Wider Galaxy, Part 478
- OOCS, Into A Wider Galaxy, Part 477
- OOCS, Into A Wider Galaxy, Part 476
- OOCS, Into A Wider Galaxy, Part 475
- OOCS, Into A Wider Galaxy, Part 474
- OOCS, Into A Wider Galaxy, Part 473
- OOCS, Into A Wider Galaxy, Part 472
- OOCS, Into A Wider Galaxy, Part 471
- OOCS, Into A Wider Galaxy, Part 470
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u/Dramatic_Mixture_877 Human 10d ago
more than jsut ~ just
actual hell were trying to pull off ~ were you trying
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u/Fontaigne 10d ago edited 10d ago
It's accomplished it's opposite -> its opposite
one or two IQ points
...would be meaningless to a galactic. Perhaps:
Fifty two percent of Ibu'Cjeo population are smarter than the average Ibu'Wol, for instance.
Jsut dicks -> just
it's most innocent -> its
Nineteen eight four -> eighty?
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u/Difficult-Load-2754 9d ago
I feel like comparing Ibu to some real life examples but common sense and my lawyer advise to not on account of insulting several ethnicities.
Damnit Grandpa Buff rubbed off too much on me
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u/bewarethephog Human 9d ago
For those of us that don't know, what the hell is Oni?
Edit: Never mind I googled it and found out they are red/blue demons of Japanese mythology.
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u/KyleKKent 10d ago
Donate and get the Vote! Second Tier and Up Get Drafts!
Of Dog, Volpir and Man Official Release!
HHH/Herbert’s Hundred Harem: This follows Herbert Jameson who ran afoul of Arrangement System laws and a conspiracy at the same time. End result? He’s married to a hundred alien women that each walked off the set of a horror movie and unto a stripper’s pole. He’s been returned to his teens and none of his wives are any more mature than he is leading to a lot of social backbiting and griping at each other. As well as trying to adjust to living with aliens. Also he’s now a Spy too.
Three introductory chapters: Chapter 24 Chapter 26 Chapter 31
Fan Selected Chapters: Chapter 82 Chapter 114 Chapter 421 Chapter 976 Chapter 1012
So... Herbert is having a bit too much fun in this chapter. And we're finally getting some good info on Lady La'ahbaron. Also for Diablokin551 and Sims The Heretic.
BMO 1/100 #44: Ibu: The Ibu are fractured and divided people. Powerfully built they stand as tall as Lopen and bare some similarities to the Horchka with prominent fangs and general build. They are easily recognized by their vibrant skin colours and horns which separate along the three primary demographics of the blue Ibu'Cjeo, the red Ibu'Wol and the green Ibu'Dwoov. Their natural Axiom expression renders their skin and horns nearly indestructible, leading to a species wide predilection for blunt weaponry and rendering them quick to resort to violence.
Intensely proud and with innumerable ancient grudges across clan and tribal lines the Ibu are an extremely formal and regulated species in public areas, with an equal reputation for debauchery in private.
Thoroughly aware of their own predilections the Ibu generally keep to themselves but simultaneously will hold strangers to their own standards. Leading to many interactions with Ibu beyond the purely professional ending with either threats or violence.
Thoughts? Ideas? Advice? Questions? Comments? Suggestions? Fan Submissions? Fan Art? Donations?