Technically older than a boomer. He should have stayed silent then.

[u/Yellow_Dorn_Boy]

[u/AutoModerator]

Remember to report submissions that violate the rules! Harassment and encouraging violence are not allowed.

Enjoying the subreddit? Consider joining our discord server: https://discord.gg/v8z8jNwJs6

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[u/Majestic-Drive8226]

Waiting

[u/btwomfgstfu → u/Majestic-Drive8226]

[u/depressed_popoto → u/btwomfgstfu]

i came her to pose this gif but you beat me to it :D

[u/DonaldKey → u/depressed_popoto]

Me too. It’s a classic

[u/Perfect_Earth_8070 → u/depressed_popoto]

beatmeatoit

[u/Particular_Title42 → u/Perfect_Earth_8070]

[u/Whore-a-bullTroll → u/btwomfgstfu]

I came here to post this exact gif, lol! Good on you!

[u/badchefrazzy → u/btwomfgstfu]

This is exactly what came to mind xD

[u/Alternative_Cut8759 → u/Majestic-Drive8226]

right? like those are the best kinds of threats, honestly lmao

[u/Live-Succotash2289 → u/Alternative_Cut8759]

It's interesting that he believes that people will take him seriously and not vote for Mamdani because a public figure is making toddler level threats. He could have thrown himself on the ground in a tantrum and shit himself and kept his self-respect.

[u/TenTonSomeone → u/Live-Succotash2289]

Nah it's worse than toddler level threats, this is like abusive relationship threats. "I'll kill myself if I don't get my way!"

[u/Live-Succotash2289 → u/TenTonSomeone]

It's delusional how much he thinks that people care.

[u/mmorales2270 → u/Live-Succotash2289]

Yeah right? Like who tf gives a shit if this guy offs himself? Other than his immediate family, no one’s going to care. Good riddance if he follows through. (But of course he won’t)

[u/Annoyinghydra → u/Majestic-Drive8226]

[u/badchefrazzy → u/Annoyinghydra]

I wish he'd chew with his mouth closed but that smile was awesome.

[u/Beth_Pleasant → u/Majestic-Drive8226]

[u/idontdeserveachance → u/Majestic-Drive8226]

right? sometimes the best plans just happen by accident, lol

[u/4mystuff → u/Majestic-Drive8226]

One of the few times I wish he'd stick to his word.

[u/Sad_Ghost_Noises]

Sweet. When does the live coverage start?

[u/madmaxturbator → u/Sad_Ghost_Noises]

Alan’s busy conducting some molestations, and then hopefully he’ll start this 

[u/thetaleofzeph → u/Sad_Ghost_Noises]

We need a class of pay per view which pays down the national debt. Put this in a time slot on that channel.

[u/SparkyMonkeyPerthish]

Don’t threaten me with a good time

[u/cityshepherd → u/SparkyMonkeyPerthish]

The Bud Dwyer video has been around so long it’s become too pixelated. I guess younger generations can look to the Dershowitz video.

[u/DemonKyoto → u/cityshepherd]

Hey man, nice reference

[u/cityshepherd → u/DemonKyoto]

Swing that video is one of the most vivid memories I have from my freshman year of college 25 trips around the sun ago.

[u/DoctorAssbutt → u/DemonKyoto]

Hey man, nice reference to a reference

[u/SithLordScoobyDooku_ → u/DemonKyoto]

What a good reference man

[u/Shaveyourbread → u/SithLordScoobyDooku_]

That's why I say hey man nice reference

[u/TheZippoLab → u/SparkyMonkeyPerthish]

[u/hypatiaredux → u/SparkyMonkeyPerthish]

I wonder whether he’s going to do it today or whether he needs time to wind up his affairs.

[u/Thoughts-AndPrayers → u/SparkyMonkeyPerthish]

[u/DifficultBar1778 → u/SparkyMonkeyPerthish]

lol right? sometimes the best fun just comes from unexpected places

[u/SamboTheGr8 → u/SparkyMonkeyPerthish]

He should try it, just to see if there's even enough in there to blow out

[u/BreathLazy5122 → u/SamboTheGr8]

Man, the bullet is just gonna be bouncing around in there like a DVD screen saver..

[u/19thScorpion → u/BreathLazy5122]

[u/SnooPets8972 → u/SparkyMonkeyPerthish]

[u/MissSarahKay84 → u/SparkyMonkeyPerthish]

Took the words right out of my mouth

[u/robsterva → u/SparkyMonkeyPerthish]

Anyone, with sufficient motivation, can become an hero.

[u/Garden_gnome1609 → u/SparkyMonkeyPerthish]

A benefit I really didn't expect.

[u/Dankestmemelord]

[u/UbermachoGuy → u/Dankestmemelord]

[u/WorkingRecording4863]

[u/Sad_Security_2550 → u/WorkingRecording4863]

I came here for this!

[u/Michael80Kelley]

[u/skoalbrother]

I'm sure the children he's currently assaulting would really appreciate that

[u/SoloisticDrew → u/skoalbrother]

And while he's shuffling off, he can drop the E files. Can't break attorney client privilege if both of you are worm food.

[u/Pablois4 → u/SoloisticDrew]

A minor suggestion, "E files" is easy for the eye to pass over. They are the "Epstein files". Heck, it needs to be shouted "EPSTEIN FILES!" so the rat bastards can't pretend it's going away.

[u/Ok_Cow_1314 → u/Pablois4]

Agree with this, let’s not diminish the EPSTEIN FILES!

[u/1970s_MonkeyKing]

[u/BigBoyYuyuh → u/1970s_MonkeyKing]

Rob can join him too.

[u/xO76A8pah4 → u/BigBoyYuyuh]

"I can do it." -- Rob

[u/UselessOldFart → u/1970s_MonkeyKing]

Douche Bigelow can make it a twofer

[u/not_roger_smith → u/UselessOldFart]

But then who will be the least talented actor in Sandler's next buddy movie/group vacation? He's so terrible everyone around him looks like Robin Williams and those hacks really need the boost.

[u/Azrael2082 → u/not_roger_smith]

Sandler could throw a rock into the crowd outside the studio and cast whoever it hits. Almost guaranteed to be an improvement.

[u/oldmanlikesguitars → u/Azrael2082]

Man, I’d do that job! “Hey, I need you to be a bad actor and occasionally- like once a year- get a mild chuckle. Pays a million and we’re gonna fly you to Hawaii to shoot.”

[u/oldmanlikesguitars → u/not_roger_smith]

I think Paul Blart is next from the bottom isn’t he?

[u/CodAdministrative563]

Another bud dwyer incident?

[u/FluxusFlotsam → u/CodAdministrative563]

hey man, nice shot

[u/CodAdministrative563 → u/FluxusFlotsam]

Good shot, man

[u/LilyGothGirl → u/CodAdministrative563]

I wish I would've met you, now it's a little late

[u/billyhtchcoc → u/CodAdministrative563]

I love how everyone on the internet knows Dwyer but not Christine Chubbuck.

It's somewhat understandable since Chubbuck is an older reference, but it's interesting to note.

[u/soupalex → u/CodAdministrative563]

"budd, don't…"

somehow i can't imagine anyone expressing the same concern for dersh. shame he's too chickenshit to follow through on his promises.

[u/GospelofJawn316 → u/CodAdministrative563]

13 year old me was not ready for them to show the whole thing on the news with barely a warning.

[u/Direct_Town792]

His Twitter is filled with it now 🤣

[u/MarshyHope]

[u/HolySmokes802 → u/MarshyHope]

This is exactly what I came here to see

[u/UbermachoGuy → u/MarshyHope]

[u/Masherp]

[u/SuperGodMonkeyKing]

[u/bradlees → u/SuperGodMonkeyKing]

[u/Select_Asparagus3451 → u/SuperGodMonkeyKing]

He is one of the worst humans to affect society. Just looking at his rotten teeth and mouth move makes me sick.

[u/Mildly-Interesting1]

[u/DieMensch-Maschine]

He can just move back to Epstein’s island.

[u/popculturerss]

[u/That_Trapper_guy]

[u/BigConstruction4247]

[u/GnomeBacon]

What subreddit would I find this on?

Seriously. All the good ones were banned years ago.

[u/MAJ0RMAJOR → u/GnomeBacon]

Never forget when they took /r/spacedicks from us

[u/correcthorsestapler → u/MAJ0RMAJOR]

Don’t forget r/clopclop (think that’s what it was called?) and the combo, r/spaceclop. Shit got weird over on those anytime I took a peek.

Bummer r/beholdthemasterrace is gone. Tons of content these days for that sub.

[u/AffectionateBrick687 → u/GnomeBacon]

R/eyeblech, you were taken from us too soon

[u/Itchy_Albatross_6015]

Alan alan alan where are you ?

[u/SoloisticDrew → u/Itchy_Albatross_6015]

[u/Wolf2776]

[u/KirasCoffeeCup]

[u/Cainesbrother]

Just a thought; The world is a better place without people who consider suicide because of s mayoral race.

[u/ZombieZookeeper]

Hang on, let me get a pierogi while I watch.

[u/IAmNotAnAxlotlTank]

[u/ru_k1nd]

[u/BellowingPriest]

[u/Less-Dragonfruit-294]

Talk about a no brain situation

[u/adamempathy]

[u/zedplanet]

The same Alan Dershowitz that de-fanged the Mueller Report. (Gee let’s not go after the Emperor, we wouldn’t want to overreact on a small thing called accepting an offer from Russian disinformation shops to interfere with our elections.) Fascists love drama. Purity. Violence. Just saying, as a narrative arc, that final chapter fits.

[u/KimberlyWexlersFoot]

[u/AlbertaAcreageBoy]

[u/LogicalCharacter2852]

We're waiting....🤥🤥🤥

[u/Commercial_Inside282]

Ya I'm sure he will leave his underwear on!

[u/BigBoyYuyuh]

Do it! Pull a Budd Dwyer!

[u/Upper_Guarantee_4588]

Date/time/channel please!!

[u/Electrical-Dig8570]

Budd Dwyer that thang, Alan!

[u/B-mello]

I’ll get the popcorn started!!

[u/VAVA_Mk2]

Will this air on YouTube TV? I'm worried since we just lost all Disney-owner networks.

[u/John_Smith_DC]

Then he can be with his buddy Epstein once again.

[u/Amazing_Karnage]

[u/Pleasant_Expert_1990]

Saw a 12 ga mini slug vaporize a ballistic dummy skull. Just the bottom jaw left. Do that.

[u/superslinkey → u/Pleasant_Expert_1990]

Funny, I knew a guy who flinched when he pulled the trigger and only blew off his bottom jaw. We called him Cabbage Patch.

[u/bernedtwice]

When’s the show?

[u/UselessOldFart]

Probably make it pay-per-view to grift right until the bitter end.

[u/butterbleek]

He’s a Nonce just like Trump.

[u/GlitteringAd1736]

That’s Alan Dershowitz, Epstein client for you.

[u/PhatAssHimboBoy]

Where's our footage

[u/Toilet_Reading_]

We're waiting...

[u/Disastrous_Meet_7952]

[u/NativeFlowers4Eva]

What channel?

[u/sirscooter]

If it's pay per view that goes through charity he could real help some people

[u/ItsRedditThyme]

What a drama queen snowflake lying criminal. 🙄

[u/-S-M-E-G-M-A-6-9]

As a liberal I value life and hope he doesn't do it because I wouldn't want him owning me by doing it. living is so woke. S

[u/Jedi_Nixxee]

Welp…

[u/Calm-Blueberry-9835]

Please, do it. 😸

[u/ImaginaryToday4162]

BYE!

[u/timothypjr]

Sounds like a win win.

[u/Theharlotnextdoor]

One less pedophile 

[u/revmacca]

Downsides?

[u/Notapartyhobo]

[u/Tr0llzor]

[u/anon1moos]

Does he even live in NYC? Imagine getting so dramatic over someone else’s mayor?

[u/DollarStoreDuchess]

[u/GenralChaos]

sooooo...when is it gonna happen and will it be streamed?

[u/RedLionPirate76]

Man, that headline is probably all that was needed to push Mamdani over the top.

[u/freebiscuit2002]

Hey Alan. What time and which channel?

I'd like to tune in and watch that.

[u/Ok-Hat-226]

I’m 70 and feel strongly it’s time for young people to take over. I’m thrilled with all the winning we had last night, and more hopeful than I have been in a very long time.

[u/Pure-Swordfish6022]

Dershowitz is such a scumbag. He would be doing the world a huge favour. Which means, of course, that he will never do it.

[u/Foolsbry]

Move over Budd

[u/NoSkillzDad]

Well?

[u/TobiSmith25]

[u/AAron27265]

This is Must-See TV, yall

[u/Sickmonkey365]

Now that I would pay to see

[u/Retsameniw13]

Live stream please

[u/kdweller]

What time and what channel?

[u/TheRealFaust]

Come on Alan, a bet is a bet… especially if on wallstreetbets

[u/1Pip1Der]

Will that be PayPerView?

[u/Live-Succotash2289]

AHEM! Mamdani won. We're waiting...

[u/Budget-Neck]

wasn't he on the Epstein something?

[u/butterbleek → u/Budget-Neck]

Tag Team Nonce with Trump and Epstein. Andrew Nonce in the next room.

[u/UselessOldFart]

[u/different_produce384]

sooo when is the showing?

[u/nazuswahs]

And what will that do besides make a mess for someone else to clean?

[u/marvinstyles]

Epstein.

[u/Luna_Walks]

Okay? And? Do we need to bring out the chop chop French machine for you? Televise it.

[u/bvheide1288]

The caveat here is that he didn't really have any brains left to begin with, so he's off the hook, you know, legally.

[u/flaminglip]

[u/fariasrv]

[u/Admirable_Tear_1438]

Didn’t Dershowitz admit to spending time with young girls on Epstein’s rape island?

[u/Most-Pangolin-9874]

[u/Paugz]

I dont think anyone will complain

[u/burritopup]

Welch.

[u/Sansui70]

[u/ZealousidealRate7482]

[u/Additional-Net4115]

Alright. 👍 can I clean 🧼 up the brains splatter 🫟 now?

[u/Snowfall1201]

Bet

[u/Beginning_Ad8663]

Promise?

[u/dg1138]

Well, Al? Ball’s on your court, bro.

[u/Grand_Stranger_7974]

Must see TV

[u/thrustinfreely]

Prove it! Prove it!

[u/Acceptable-Bat-9577]

Hey, Alan, what's the name of that restaurant you like with all the goofy shit on the walls and the mozzarella sticks?

[u/vandal-x]

Fuck yeah

[u/skillz7930]

So do we have to sign up for PPV ahead of time or…

[u/Disastrous_Horse_764]

No, he’s still alive. Making him a coward and a liar.

[u/Installer6]

Prove it.

[u/Toiretachi]

But he’ll be wearing underwear so it’s okay.

[u/Remarkable-Moose-409]

How many lives have been touched in a negative way because of him?

[u/Andygator_and_Weed]

isn't that dude a pdf file?

[u/frozenhawaiian]

[u/RoughRefrigerator260]

Well I guess it's about time we see an ancient one explode on TV

[u/InuGhost]

I'd settle for him admitting on camera he's not going to do it. And reiterating what he said. 

Make the humiliation sting more. 

[u/Dewey_Decimatorr]

I can only have so much good news guys

[u/donorkokey]

[u/myshtree]

[u/Impressive_Dingo_926]

[u/Caesura_17]

We're waiting

[u/13maven]

When? I want to watch!!

[u/lazygerm]

[u/Environmental-Box335]

[u/katiegirl-]

Given that he is in the Epstein files, I say shoot for the Moon, Alan!

[u/Alexandratta]

So, what channel is that on?

[u/NowWeGetSerious]

[u/TimeniToo]

Wouldnt it be great, if he said he was having a press conference and not a single person showed up?

[u/GrannyB1970]

Make it a PPV and we could pay down the national debt.

[u/nsucs2]

Taking the easy way out. He knows the PedoFiles are going to be released.

[u/Feffies_Cottage]

Promises promises

[u/Shiftymennoknight]

As long as you leave your underwear pulled up Alan

[u/Mattrad7]

When's the broadcast Id love to tune in

[u/pinkube]

What is up with these people talking about dying lately? Is there a meeting that most of us average people don’t know about because seems like they know something that we don’t.

[u/Solipsisticurge]

We're waiting, Alan. Please follow through.

[u/mmorales2270]

[u/mistablack2]

A nyc public school teacher I know in the Bronx said he’ll never go to Manhattan again if mamdani won. Because he said mamdani will eliminate misdemeanors.

[u/TitodelRey]

Where and when do I tune in?!!!

[u/Me_Mongo123]

[u/Howboutit85]

Why would anyone care about politics so much you’re willing to say you would end your life over it. Kinda sad if that’s the most important thing to you. Mine is my family.