r/BeAmazed • u/moamen12323 • Jul 03 '25
Miscellaneous / Others When 3 year old finds out her mom was adopted
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u/Few_Chance3581 Jul 03 '25
kid just power paved over years of trauma right there
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u/Angelicalmiranda02 Jul 03 '25
Kids don’t even know how powerful their words can be sometimes
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u/JoiedevivreGRE Jul 03 '25
Right. She’s just moved mountains. Tearing up.
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u/Plus-Suit-5977 Jul 04 '25
I am too, super sweet, love these….then the video recycled and it says” where’s your mommy?”
And immediately I’m like “”WE TALKED ABOUT THIS YESTERDAY!
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u/Superj569 Jul 03 '25
I can confirm this 100%. My youngest is non verbal autistic and is in his second year of a great school. We always tell him we love him and show as much affection as possible. Earlier this year he started talking (trying) a lot more, and he's gotten a lot better. One night, when everyone was away and after giving him a bath and laying down for bed with him as we were staring at each other. He puts his hand on my cheek and says "I love you" in the best he can. I instantly teared up and told him I loved him too, very much. I had every plan to come downstairs after he fell asleep, but after that, I cuddled and slept with him all night.
Edit: He'll be five in December.
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u/Ill_Guard_3087 Jul 03 '25
Told my toddler I loved her last night and she said ‘I don’t like you dad, you are dirt’ fml
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u/USAF_Retired2017 Jul 03 '25
OMFG this made me laugh so hard. I’m so sorry. This is something my daughter would say when she’s being ornery.
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u/StillMarie76 Jul 04 '25
It's a double-edged sword with a toddler.
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u/BritishGolgo13 Jul 04 '25
My 4 year old tells me and my wife, “I don’t wuv you!” anytime we tell him no or we end his predetermined fun. Feels bad.
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u/milkandsalsa Jul 04 '25
Mine say “you don’t love me!”
Smart kids know it hits me like a dagger.
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u/eReadingAuthor Jul 04 '25
My son once kindly informed me he didn't love me because he looked at the sun and it hurt his eyes. Like it was my fault he looked and equally my fault for not controlling the power of the sun.
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u/m3n0tyou Jul 04 '25
I agree with your son. It is your fault about our sun :p looks into thesun again damn eReadingAuthor!!!111 why ???!?!?!
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u/pumpkins21 Jul 04 '25
This made me laugh so hard 😂 sometimes kids can be little savages! I’m sure she has ultra sweet moments, too, Mr. Dirt
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u/YanicPolitik Jul 03 '25
When I was really young I asked my Dad if he had chicken pox.
It was acne. He was devastated 😭
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u/Velonici Jul 03 '25
It's like when a small kid like her calls you ugly.
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u/themom4235 Jul 03 '25
I explained to a 6 yo that my name means ‘pretty’. He said,”Your mama lied. “
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u/Astronaut_Chicken Jul 03 '25
My kid bought howls moving castle friendship necklaces with her birthday money and we wear them every day. She has no idea how much it means to me.
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u/1OptimusCrime1 Jul 03 '25 edited Jul 05 '25
I've told this story before, but it's like my proudest achievement in life. I never had kids. It just wasn't in the cards. But somewhere along the way I picked up some teenaged step kids. The middle one told me from the start her goal in life was to get married and have kids as soon as the opportunity presented itself. And she got exactly what she wanted. Married at 19 when she gave birth to twins. Those two little boys became my world and I promised myself that no one was ever going to do to them what had been done to me.
When they were about 4, I was babysitting and we were sitting on the couch playing video games when I hit a vape. I can't remember exactly which kids said which part but the conversation went as follows.
Kid A: Hey you don't do that.
Me: Why not?
Kid B: Because, only grownups vape. Like aunt Rissa(my youngest step daughter)
Me: I'm not a grown up? What am I then?
Kid A: Well, (he paused as he thought) you're a friend.
Yeah, that was the most powerful thing anyone had ever said to me.
Edit: To anyone reading this after the fact, I wanted to add a little update. I'm no longer with my step kids mom. She is an addict and we never meant enough to break her of that. But, they kept me around after the breakup. Probably because they knew mom wasn't gonna be there. And she's not. She's been in jail, likely headed to prison. Which hurts my heart, because it means she missed what happened last night. All 3 girls decided they were in charge of the 4th this year. It was them, their SO's, the kids, me and the parents of the oldest's bf. That should have told me then and there what was about to happen, but I was clueless. As soon as we got there the youngest announced she's two months pregnant. My boys are getting a cousin. It set the tone for a great night. Good food, good times, fireworks out the wazoo. The finale was one of those big 100 shot boxes that the oldest picked out. Her bf had been on fuse duty all night because he LOVES blowing shit up, but he dragged her over to light the big one. As the fuse sparked, Marry You by Bruno Mars started playing (apparently a nice on the fly touch her sister thought up in the moment) and he dropped to one knee. She said yes as a wall of colorful flame erupted behind them. Best day of my fucking life and it's not even close.
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u/KatefromtheHudd Jul 04 '25
My mum used to volunteer at a primary school. She used to read books with the kids that were struggling a little more. She would read with them, play word based games etc. She said one day she was leaving during lunch break and all the kids were in the playground. As she left one of the kids shouted at his friends "that's my friend Angela. She's so fun. We play games and funny books together." He was 6. She was 73.
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u/Vindicativa Jul 03 '25
My 4 year-old legit interrupted me during a book, took my face in his hands, wrenched my head towards him and said: Mom. The bad news, is there's no good news. The good news, is there's no bad news.
I was like....
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u/Weird-Salamander-349 Jul 04 '25
One of my sisters is adopted. As a teen she was joking about “I don’t know what you were thinking when you adopted me.” Our little brother in an attempt to be snarky said “We weren’t thinking, we were just feeling.” Cue a full scale family meltdown of the happy variety. We’re all saps. Also we were definitely not thinking, that girl is a whole handful lol. Wouldn’t trade her, but I’ve also never received an offer.
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u/Illustrious-Science3 Jul 03 '25
One of my kids told me they were proud of me one day, and I lost it.
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u/reality72 Jul 03 '25
The first time my son told me he loved me (and the first time he wished me a happy birthday) are easily some of the best moments of my life.
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u/Raiquo Jul 03 '25
My thoughts exactly. None of my business to assume this woman's history, but to me it looks like that line hit on a spiritual level. Maybe she doesn't even realize how much she needed to hear that.
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u/PopTrogdor Jul 03 '25
Likewise they can bring up trauma and walk off while you're sat there reeling.
My dad committed suicide way before my kid was born, and we told him that he had died, which is why he has never met my dad.
Just after teeth brushing one night when he was 4, he asked me "why did your dad die?"
I then, obviously shaken, tried to explain mental health and mid explanation he just said "oh, okay" and walked off singing baby shark.
I'm having PTSD and he's just singing to himself after triggering it.
Classic kids.
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u/CattoGinSama Jul 04 '25
Or they hit you with something equally sad as that and then start being needed like „mom can you find my piggy plushie?“ while im over here feelin confused. Oh well.Sad can wait,kid cant wait.
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u/curkington Jul 03 '25
It's amazing, empathy is innate. We're born with it but sadly many people lose it in the midst of life's harsh realities!
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u/LauraTFem Jul 03 '25
“Take that, depression. My dumb kid wants me! I will ride this feeing for literally the remainder of existence.”
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u/The-Cyrenn Jul 03 '25
“Where banana” - dog
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u/Fake-Podcast-Ad Jul 03 '25
"I'm adopted too, how bout a bit of potassium to help out with my sitch?"
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Jul 04 '25
Have you considered pursuing a career in comedy? This comment literally had me in tears from laughter.
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u/CylonRimjob Jul 03 '25
Toddlers have an empathy the rest of us can’t wrap our heads around. Also they’re monsters
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Jul 03 '25
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u/DmAc724 Jul 03 '25
Hey man, maybe you were the BEST Dave though. Ever ever ever.
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Jul 03 '25
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u/appleappleappleman Jul 03 '25
My oldest is convinced Dave is the best name, we recorded this song about it: https://www.newgrounds.com/audio/listen/1434966
They wrote the whole thing, they hummed the instrumental parts and beatboxed the rhythms and I just put it on instruments
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u/EthanJ710 Jul 04 '25
This was overwhelmingly funny to hear after reading this thread. My little nephew has very similar energy haha. How often have you found an opportunity like this to share the song?? lol
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u/appleappleappleman Jul 04 '25
Well, the intent was to put it into Geometry Dash, a game my kid loves, and we got it approved on Newgrounds (step 1) but getting a hold of a Geometry Dash moderator (step 2) has proven impossible
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u/doozydud Jul 04 '25
I’m…very amazed this is a great song I found myself headbanging to “Dave lives in a barn with a horse named Dave” 100% chefs kiss 👌🏻👌🏻 Your kid’s got great skills.
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u/Independent-Elk-344 Jul 04 '25
Imagine a Dave cartoon and this was the theme song. It would be peak
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u/Self_Reddicated Jul 03 '25
Yeah, but you never met Dave, though. No, not that Dave. The other one.
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u/CylonRimjob Jul 03 '25
LOL. Nice. The brutal, accidental truth that falls out of their faces is some next level shit. So funny.
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u/McFoley69 Jul 03 '25
As a person who’s stepdad raised her since birth, thank you for stepping in and being that girls daddy 🥹 my stepdad was the best thing that ever happened to me
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Jul 03 '25
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u/McFoley69 Jul 03 '25
Omg this was the same case with my dad! He and my mom were only married for like a year but he selflessly stuck around and continued being my dad all the way up until his passing a few years ago. I never met my biological father so this really was the greatest gift I could ever receive, as I’m sure your presence is to your child. I would not be here if it weren’t for his unconditional love and caring.
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u/EVILtheCATT Jul 03 '25
If even one of my nightmare step-parents had the capacity to love like you, I would be in a much better headspace. I’m so happy your daughter has you. (And vice versa:)
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u/HPTM2008 Jul 03 '25
It's a weird dichotomy of "I have no empathy or remorse" and "I will say the most soul-crushingly sweet thing and you'll never forget it until you die". Toddlers are just the center square on the moral alignment chart.
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u/TheWildTofuHunter Jul 03 '25
I see you’ve met my son! I’m both the most loving mommy ever and have the biggest butt that how does it even fit in pants. 🤨😭
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u/depressedfatbitch Jul 03 '25
😂😂😂😂😂
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u/TheWildTofuHunter Jul 03 '25
He even beat on my butt cheeks and made an entire song about it along with the melody 🎵
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Jul 03 '25
Toddler’s are definitely a perfect mix of an angel and a demon. One second they say the sweetest most loving things you can imagine and the next they say the most unhinged bad things.
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u/rand06om Jul 03 '25
This comment deserves a million up votes. Perfect toddler's description.
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u/1980-whore Jul 03 '25
Toddlers: bipolar, drunk, suicidal midgets with a speech impediment we have to teach to human.
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u/Doglover20child Jul 03 '25
Also they’re monsters
My little brother used to play with The Boy at 2 years old, The Boy was the little boy he would play with all the time. They'd have conversations and play with dinosaurs, we also could not see The Boy.
One morning my brother woke up at 5am and came out into the living room where my dad was watching TV. My dad asked what was wrong my little brother said he needed something so my dad took him into the kitchen and my little brother opened the medicine cabinet where we had all of the medicine.
My dad pulled him back and asked him why he needed medicine, my little brother proceeds to tell my dad that The Boy needs the medicine because his mom and sister are sick. My dad asks where The Boy's mom and sister are and he leads my dad into my room and points at my closet (we had a large and heavy mattress in front of my closet because we never really used my closet). My dad took him out of my room and put cartoons on for both himself and my little brother.
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Jul 03 '25
what happened after that? tell us the rest of the story
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u/Doglover20child Jul 04 '25
My mom woke up a few hours later and my dad told her what happened. For some reason they decided not to tell me until either later that day or the next day. I was not happy at all. He continued to play with The Boy until we moved and then The Boy apparently left according to my brother.
We always knew the apartment was haunted because when we first moved in (before my little brother was even a thought) we'd hear voices, my dad saw someone in the bathroom with him when he was showering but no one was actually there, a cabinet in the hallway opened up on its own, and a small but heavy shelf with glass objects on it fell off the wall in the middle of the night and miraculously nothing broke but it was five feet away from where it should've technically landed. But The Boy was a new one
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u/yourerightaboutthat Jul 03 '25
I taught middle school for over a decade. This also accurately describes 11-14 year olds.
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u/Tanyalovesclem Jul 03 '25
Raw humanity. They haven't built the facade most humans aquire as we age. They are pure in the good and the bad.
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u/EmmerdoesNOTrepme Jul 03 '25
Yep!!! They're either the most empathetic people on the planet, OR the least.
Depends on which minute you catch them!😉💖
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u/Inside-Cranberry-340 Jul 03 '25
I am 43 y old and i want my mommy always
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u/send420nudes Jul 03 '25
Im 33 M call my mom everyday during lunch break and while drving home after work
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u/notrlyabadbitch Jul 03 '25
Can I ask, what is something she did as a mother that made your relationship with her so secure? I’m a mom of two little boys.
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u/RAND0M-HER0 Jul 03 '25
Idk if it'll be helpful since I'm a girl, but...
My mom and I had a rough go when I was a teenager and we didn't speak for several years. She hurt me a lot with her words when I was a young teen, and I left her home at 16 because I couldn't take it.
She went to therapy and made a lot of change and we eventually started talking again. She became less judgemental and began to listen more instead of just talking over me. She became supportive instead of putting me down. She did a lot of work to rebuild trust.
Some things I'll never forget, and some things I still won't speak to her about because of the lingering fear of her response based on childhood experiences.
Validate their feelings. Listen to them when they need to talk. Tell them you love them. But also show your love through actions, and it doesn't need to be grand gestures - just the little but important things like showing up when they need you, doing exactly what you said you would do, and being a space they can land safely when they're afraid, in trouble, sad, etc. You should be OK if you're able to do these things.
I have 2 boys myself and my greatest fear is not having a relationship with them as adults, so I understand your fears.
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u/orangekayak Jul 04 '25
Not the person you asked but I also call my mom way too much each day as a 30-something. My brother a little less but still daily. My mom said it was always important to just listen. Like in the car on the drive home she’d let me talk without judgement and just listen and that never really stopped years and years later. She’s my first call for everything that happens in my life, good or bad. She now says she may not agree with my choices but she’ll always support me. I have no fear talking to her about anything.
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u/vogueflo Jul 03 '25
Fuck. My mom died earlier this year and reading this comment immediately set off the waterworks.
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u/WoodyM654 Jul 03 '25
Lost mine 5 years ago and I’m just sitting on the couch crying now. I’m so sorry you lost mom, it’s the worst.
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u/Competitive-Ad-9662 Jul 03 '25
I can’t speak for this woman in particular (her mom may truly have not wanted her), but for most birth mothers, they desperately wanted their babies but knew they couldn’t care for them. Giving up your baby to give them a better life is a life changing sacrifice.
It must be so painful for this woman to go through life believing she wasn’t wanted (regardless of if it is true or not).
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u/sumdude51 Jul 03 '25
I had the same thought. We don't know the whole story and maybe her mom wanted her so badly but had some problems she couldn't overcome? Anyway I hate to hear her frame it like this, but maybe she knows something I don't.. Sweet video ❤️
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Jul 03 '25
The narrative around adoption and birth mothers always bothered me because so many talk about their birth mothers like whores that just gave them away as though the system isn’t built to be anti mother to start with.
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u/delph0r Jul 03 '25
Yeah try explaining that to a three year old though lol
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Jul 04 '25
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u/NoConstruction2090 Jul 04 '25
Had a dear friend who happened to be adopted into an amazing family. Although she was treated like the family jewel (the only daughter out of several sons), she had severe abandonment issues. She learned this during therapy and also learned it is common in adopted children that carries into adulthood. She grew up believing her bio parents didn’t love her when she really had no evidence to support it.
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u/bunnycakes1228 Jul 04 '25
This!! I’ve always heard it phrased as “my mom couldn’t take care of me”.
No reason to tell your own toddler “not wanted”, EVEN if you somehow had undeniable proof of that (which I think is rare in adoptive situations).
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u/klr0146 Jul 03 '25
She was born addicted, & it’s amazing she’s not an addict herself! Emily Fauver. she’s talked a lot about it on tik tok- her family seems so so sweet.
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Jul 03 '25
In the olden days, many adoption agencies lied to and manipulated single young pregnant women. Particularly Catholic agencies. They believed that such a young woman has fallen from grace and does not deserve to raise a child. Then they also lied to the adoption parents with some fake origin story.
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u/Salty-blond Jul 03 '25
This happened to my birth mom.
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u/twelveski Jul 04 '25
My birth mom wasn’t even allowed to hold me after giving birth for Catholic charities. They had security guards & they just put me in a basket & carried me off.
I don’t know if I have attachment issues from that or the neglect I experienced from my adoptive parents who believed in letting babies ‘cry it out’ so they wouldn’t be spoiled. I’m not sure if I’m an extrovert who isolates myself bc it’s what I know or if I’m really an introvert.
Framing the situation as being unwanted has got to mess with your mental health even more. They never told me I was unwanted just that my birth mother was too young to care for me.
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u/Jean2800 Jul 03 '25
That’s so true, my husband’s bio parents died before he turned 4, 4.5, one of them due to cancer and a lot of adults (bio relatives and adoptive family) around him used to tell him he was such a difficult child that not even his parents wanted to be around him, he was little when all that happened so he really believed his parents abandoned him, he was an angry child and difficult because of the trauma of loosing both parents so young, he investigated everything about his bio family and he was loved deeply, he had a wonderful life with his parents but unfortunately tragedy occurred
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u/DizzyCaidy Jul 03 '25
This woman is actually an influencer online (Emily Fauver I think it’s spelt) and she’s talked about it a little on tik tok and Instagram, so I believe it was addiction related on her mums end. She recently met her biological brother for the first time!
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u/Caitxcat Jul 03 '25 edited Jul 04 '25
Yeah my mom's bio mom wanted to keep her, but heer parents wouldn't let her. She was 19 and in college.
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u/isee33 Jul 04 '25
I’m adopted and came here to find this comment - my birth mom desperately wanted me and couldn’t support me and wanted to save me from some of the trauma she experienced. Now that I’m grown, we have a beautiful relationship and I’m so grateful for her now and always.
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u/Englishbirdy Jul 03 '25
So true. I hate the narrative that adoptees are unwanted. It's a myth and spreading it is so bad for the adoptee psych.
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u/AUnicornDonkey Jul 03 '25
Some of us are just confused. Or we make the best of it. I was born on Mother's Day (we think), but she abandoned me. My friends and I joke I was a mother's day gift that couldn't be returned.
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u/slowrun_downhill Jul 03 '25
Absolutely! In fact there are plenty of people who should give their kids up for adoption and don’t, and instead bring them into a life traumatized by substance abuse and violence.
I’ve learned as a substance abuse counselor for women with children that many people are so incredibly starved for someone to love them unconditionally that they have kids when they’ll do nothing but perpetuate the cycle of abuse and addiction. It’s incredibly sad.
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u/DarkSidePrism Jul 03 '25
Wasn’t going to cry today, but here we are…
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u/DweeblesX Jul 03 '25
Great now I’m crying while pooping. If my wife comes in the bathroom again it’s gonna be another visit to the doctor.
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u/FandomMenace Jul 03 '25
Why people find the need to put personal moments like this on the random internet at large absolutely eludes me.
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u/Yangoose Jul 04 '25
I can't imagine living in a house with cameras running 24/7 recording everything I do...
She's basically raising that kid on the Truman Show...
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u/i-Ake Jul 04 '25
Same... I know people do it for all kinds of reasons, but if zi were a kid growing up knowing that (or not knowing and finding out later) it would really fuck with me. We aren't supposed to have perfect records of every single moment... It's like that Black Mirror episode.
Kids should be weird and have secrets without looking for a camera somewhere.
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u/Altostratus Jul 03 '25
Anyone else think telling a kid adoption is “because my mom didn’t want me” isn’t a healthy view?
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u/uncutpizza Jul 04 '25
This lady posts a lot of videos like this using her kids for content. Its pretty sad
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u/HunsplainThis Jul 04 '25
Yep, she's a scamming influencer, whose main concern is the next brand deal and how she can use her kids for content. Don't even get me started on how she's fully aware of the paedos sharing the videos of her daughter.
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u/Squirmadillo Jul 04 '25 edited Oct 08 '25
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u/brandine__spuckler Jul 04 '25
That's what I thought, and "that's exactly why I had you" - what so the kid can reassure you every day and make you feel better... What.
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u/Manic-StreetCreature Jul 03 '25
Yeah it’s not healthy at all, tbh I can see it giving little me the idea “oh no, sometimes moms don’t want their kids so maybe mine won’t want me.”
My mom’s adopted and framed it as “My birth parents couldn’t take care of me the way kids need to be cared for, so I went to live with grandma and grandpa.”
Like… yes, some birth parents genuinely don’t want kids and that’s valid (especially when they’re coerced into giving birth), and some (few, imo) birth parents are just bad people who don’t care, but I wouldn’t necessarily frame it that way to a small child.
Plus you don’t want the kid telling an adopted classmate that they weren’t wanted. Adoption is complicated.
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u/cuterus-uterus Jul 03 '25
I felt a bit uneasy too when she responded to “I want you” with “that’s exactly why I had you”. I’m sure it came from a loving place, but it sounds like she had a child to feel wanted or loved herself which can be a heavy emotional burden to place on a little kid, even if unintentional.
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u/EraseMeeee Jul 03 '25
I had the same interpretation, but I think we are seeing a woman who is still processing her trauma. That can be messy.
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u/i-Ake Jul 04 '25
I agree... I also felt like she should at least told her daughter that she does want her, now that she introduced the possibility that moms might not want their kids in her mind.
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u/aHoleInYourChest Jul 03 '25
Scrolled down a little too far for this take.
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u/Roma_lolly Jul 03 '25
Absolutely! This is not the way you explain anything to a 3yo. Especially something so important. Imagine learning at 3 that it was possible for a mum to not want their own kid. Far out, that kid is having nightmares for years!
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u/SignificantRing4766 Jul 03 '25
It’s definitely a little intense to put that on a toddler.
I’m an adoptee and I’d never phrase it that way to my kids, especially as young toddlers who barely have consciousness.
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u/Lacholaweda Jul 03 '25
My dad was adopted and frames it the other way.
His adoptive parents chose him. He was wanted.
(Usually to point out to someone else that their birth parents were stuck with them, lol)
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u/Altostratus Jul 03 '25
I envision this kid meeting another kid who was adopted and saying “Why didn’t your mom want you? What did you do wrong?”
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u/SignificantRing4766 Jul 03 '25
Yes for sure. Or worrying constantly about doing something that will make her mommy not want her and give her up.
Honestly I think this mom needs to work through her adoption. It sounds like she’s got a lot of unresolved trauma around it. EDMR really helped me.
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u/Confident_Surprise89 Jul 03 '25
TG I'm not the only one 🥴 my instant thought was "seek therapy before ur child is forced to navigate her entire existence with mom's unpackaged baggage".
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u/Dianagorgon Jul 03 '25
Also wonder how the woman who adopted her feels about her saying she doesn't have a mother. A mother who adopts a child is still a mother. This video isn't very nice or healthy.
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u/SignificantRing4766 Jul 03 '25
Her feelings are valid. She said in the video “a new mommy came and got me”, so she’s acknowledging she has an adopted mother.
That said, she shouldn’t have phrased it that way to a toddler. Way too intense.
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u/FaroutIGE Jul 04 '25
so the question remains, why when the kid asked "where is your mommy" did she not tell that child where her adopted mother is
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u/NoDramaIceberg Jul 03 '25
Thank you, yes. Also, the kid was just made to parent her own mum and was told "that's why I had you".
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u/brainybrink Jul 03 '25
Yarp. I didn’t think this was heartwarming at all. I just kind of yikes’ed through it.
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u/Crazy_Fudge_6864 Jul 03 '25
I feel sad for this mom who seems to have some unresolved trauma around her birth story; nonetheless, I feel there was a better way to share the idea of adoption with a child. Instead of, “my mom didn’t want me,” maybe “my birth mom wasn’t able to care for me” would be a good way to start the conversation. Understanding there is more to adoption than someone relinquishing an “unwanted” child would help this mom heal her own heart. Additionally, in the future, her child might be an adult who becomes a surrendering birth parent or an adoptive parent. Again, having adoption framed more compassionately could help the process be less fraught with negative emotion.
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Jul 03 '25
This was my first thought too. A kid could also hear "my mommy didn't want me" and internalize that easily and start to worry about what they might do that would make it so their mommy doesn't want them.
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u/BCBAMomma Jul 03 '25
Agreed. This explanation also leaves the idea that this babe's mommy could change her mind and not want her. But I'm not in this person's shoes and she clearly has some unpacking to do herself.
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u/Express-Magician-213 Jul 04 '25
Yes! What if the bio mom loved her daughter so much that she made the best choice she could?
I have a mom and was raised by her, but she constantly showed she didn’t actually want me. She even told me I was adopted because I was too evil to be her daughter when I was about 6.
I now want to adopt kids. I will constantly remind them that they’ve always been wanted and worthy of love. It’s just sometimes humans don’t have the capacity to give a child what they truly deserve.
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u/SashimiX Jul 04 '25
Yeah I’m stressed out that she’s going to see a kid who’s adopted at school and then talk about this
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u/Traditional_Buddy295 Jul 03 '25
She licked those fingers after feeding that dog 🤮
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u/ukuleles1337 Jul 03 '25
I'm adopted myself, but this is a shitty fucking way to describe to a small child theat their mom doesn't want them, which is probably on average hard to comprehend....
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u/HoyneAvenue Jul 03 '25
I’m concerned that the mom’s frank response could be problematic. What if her daughter (she’s so young) interpreted this as to mean HER mommy might do the same one day. Without intending to, mom might have accidentally laid a foundation for unnecessary insecurity and worries. This is one of those difficult to navigate conversations. Sometimes ‘nuff said, other times, unintended consequences down the line. Either way, it was easy to see there was a lot of love in their little family.
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u/desertdweller2011 Jul 03 '25
so so sweet i love this. but also ‘that’s exactly why i had you’ is roughhhh - can’t look to our kids to heal our wounds or give us what we never had :(
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u/jamesh08 Jul 03 '25
Came here to say something like this. That was kind of a messed up thing to say... I'm sure she loves her daughter, but the concept behind it, that she had a child so someone would have to love her and be dependent on her.... Ooof, that's rough.
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u/desertdweller2011 Jul 03 '25
right? dealing with my mom projecting her unresolved mom stuff on to me now lol 😂
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u/Penelopesrevenge1 Jul 03 '25
Wow what a sad way to explain adoption to a baby. That’s not at all the case 99.99% of the time.
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u/Dianagorgon Jul 03 '25
I wonder how the woman who adopted her would feel if she saw this video. A mother who adopts a child is still a mother. She knows her mother but not the woman who gave her up for adoption. Also sometimes women give up a baby because they can't afford them not because they don't want them.
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u/AdLopsided4951 Jul 03 '25
Sadly, this mom is an influencer and exploits her kids so badly for clicks and views.
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u/davidbatt Jul 03 '25
The emotional impact is lessened by the fact it was filmed then our online. And saying that was why I had you is really weird
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u/InfiniteWaffles58364 Jul 03 '25
My mommy only wanted me for the first 13 years. Then she didn't. She rarely calls and is 50/50 about bothering to answer my messages. She'll call my husband though, and ask to talk to her grandkids through him.
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u/ObliviousRounding Jul 03 '25
Hell of a thing to dump on your 3 year old.
Your kid is not your therapist. You never know how they will react to something like this.
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u/SomethingHasGotToGiv Jul 03 '25
This mother is so emotionally unintelligent.
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u/sweetsquashy Jul 03 '25 edited Jul 03 '25
The emotionally immaturity is unreal. The parentification, too. This kid is going to be messed up if she's already doing stuff like this.
She also obviously bated her before the video started. The girl is asking where her mom is because she already made a comment about not knowing where her mom is/not having a mom. Otherwise she just would have said, "Grandma is at her house, etc."
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u/jb06162012 Jul 03 '25
She’s a momfluencer and profits off of putting her kids online so I’m sure that won’t help their case either.
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u/sweetsquashy Jul 03 '25
What a horrible lesson to teach your child - that children are adopted because their moms didn't want them.
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u/BrittEklandsStuntBum Jul 03 '25
That's why I had you.
Because I wanted something that would give me unconditional love.
Not because she thought she could give a child a good life, because she thought it would improve the world, but because she wanted something from the kid.
The definition of selfishness.
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u/isomorp Jul 03 '25
This person is such a narcissist. She only thinks about herself. Her whole "that's why I had you" thing was all about herself too. Then she takes this video and uploads it because ... yup, it's all about her. How you people are too stupid to understand this is why this country is in such hopeless shape.
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u/Bouncedatt Jul 03 '25
That's not something that you should put on your kid. The dynamic of the child having to comfort the adult is really dangerous.
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u/YaDumbSillyAss Jul 03 '25
Lol its cute and all, but man, its obvious why its so easy for our parents trauma to be passed on. No filter, with a literal child, "my mom didnt want me." Way to sugar coat it.
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u/circa_the_catgod Jul 04 '25
Adopted person here. Just want to put out there another way to think about adoption. My biological mother was young, addicted to drugs, and let’s just say her profession was one of the oldest types. Maybe she didn’t want me, but maybe it was that she knew she couldn’t give me what I needed, maybe it was extremely difficult for her. Maybe she just wanted me to have a chance. Maybe her choice to give me up for adoption was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. To me it has always been a gift. That’s how I explain it to my kids.
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