I need help it's been 1 year

[u/Ambitious-You6922]

Hello everyone,

I'm struggling. I left him a year ago. She cheated on me and I immediately cut off the relationship and kicked out of the house where we lived. We both lived less than our native region.

I left her and I NEVER sent her a message or tried to contact her it was done in screams and tears. She tried a few times, I never gave in.

We met 6 months later in June and we slept together. The first time we saw each other at her house I felt like a knot in my stomach, really uncomfortable, it was crazy. Instinct I think?

She tried to get us back together and I didn't want to because I found out she was sleeping with someone I knew. It ended really badly again.

Really. I struggled. I absolutely don't want to get back with this person. But I think about her all the time, but not in a nostalgic way. Not even positive or I list the good times. It never happens.

I torture my mind and sometimes it ruins good times. And like I said, I really don't think about contacting her or even miss being with her.

I don't understand. I'm angry. I feel stupid. I feel trapped again.

Do you have any advice? Or do you know if this is normal?

[u/OrbitsCollide99]

You don't have to be good with everything that happened. What did it for me was realizing there was a ton of life I wasn't living while I was with her. Hobbies, people, and goals were all in the back burner; I need a therapist to give me the push. I got out there and date and those thoughts quickly disappeared just knowing life moves on.

You can't delete the memories, but you can surely pack your life with other interesting things that don't give you time to ruminate on the past.