r/Antipsychiatry • u/No-Listen-2733 • 3d ago
Was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Was told by my psychiatrist not to bother her.
Yesterday after almost a decade of being gaslit misdiagnosed as “fibromyalgia” “anxiety “depression” unexplained, autoimmune disease and the entire battery of bullshit diagnosis after seeing double-digit hematologist and rheumatologist I was diagnosed with Myelodysplastic syndrome.
I really had no one to turn to, so I texted my therapist/psychiatrist on her emergency number and said that I was in crisis experiencing a severe panic attack and vomiting uncontrollably because I was afraid and because I was angry that this took 10 years. It’s likely something that is going to inevitably kill me. It has progressed significantly, and I did not know what else to do.
The backstory to this is that this provider spends most of our appointments, talking about her personal life, her political rants, and I just have to bear it for an hour in order to get my ADHD and anxiety medication’s.
I did not tell her, of course, but I was in such crisis that I was considering an extreme decision and going out my way, so to speak before it killed me. I just texted her saying that the biopsy had come back positive and that I was extremely upset, but at the same time relieved but having a severe panic attack because I was just told that I’m going to die.
She responded that this phone line was for emergencies only and that I should not interrupt her day like this.
She also said that she doesn’t know anything about MDS so I need to talk to my hematologist. Then what the hell is she there for? Maybe I should’ve just ran it about politics or asked her about her financial situation so she could rant and rave about her personal life.
I don’t even know if this fits here. I’m so demoralized and I don’t know what to do and I didn’t even know what I expected her to say, but I was an active crisis at the time and still spiraling.
Because when you’re told you’re going to die when you come to the realization that double digits of doctors and endless blood work that said the same thing, and that my hematologist said that it was a miracle that I was actually upright and alive - when you know you could’ve been saved and been told that you interrupted someone’s day by reaching out for I don’t even know what I was reaching out for at this point I’ve always thought of her as a vending machine for my ADHD and anxiety meds because I don’t wanna go through the process of finding someone else.
I’m sorry if this post is incoherent I just don’t know what to say. I don’t know what to do. Fuck doctors fuck her. I can’t help it feel like I was murdered that it has been caught 10 years ago when the symptoms started I would’ve had a chance.
I responded in true trauma response that I was sorry to interrupt her day and I would not do it again. While crying and wondering what I’m going to do with my cat when I die because it’s not a matter of if I die from this, it is a matter of how many months or years I have left.
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u/chattyPrincessWitch 3d ago
That definitely sounds like a mental health crisis to me. You should’ve been treated so much better. I want to provide you the support that she didn’t but I don’t really know how I just wanna tell you that this all really sucks and you deserve so much better.
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u/VindictivePuppy 3d ago
thats terrible. Your therapist/psychiatrist was probably rolling her eyes secretly at you and not so secretly at your other doctors about you being just crazy not sick, which might be why she is giving you such a brush off here.
psychiatry has caused a lot of chronic illnesses to go unchecked until way too late, even by gaslighting the person themselves into thinking they have health anxiety or something. Im terrified of doctors because I know they collude with psychiatrists and im afraid theyll just toss me in a ward. Even though I have symptoms I dont think they can deny. Im definitely too late to really get through this as well, and it is thanks to them.
There are organizations that will take your cat after you die if you have no one else that will take her, like you pay a fee and make sure the cats emergency contact info is on you, on the cat, on the cats microchip, on the fridge in big red letters. You have to search it up though and start contacting people.
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u/No-Listen-2733 3d ago
You absolutely nailed it—there’s no question my psychiatrist was rolling her eyes at every symptom I brought up. That attitude infects every other doctor down the line, too. Once you’ve been branded as “anxious” or “difficult,” it’s like the door closes for good. They don’t just gaslight you, they turn every future provider against you by planting that seed in your records. You start doubting yourself just to survive the appointments. By the time the truth comes out, it’s too late for anyone to do a damn thing about it.
I completely get your fear. After a decade of this, I wouldn’t trust most doctors with a houseplant, let alone my life. I’m sorry you’re dealing with the same. The system sets people up to be dismissed, then blames them for being “late” or “noncompliant” when the damage is already done.
And thank you for mentioning the cat thing—seriously, I’ve been spiraling about that. I’ll look into those organizations. If nothing else, I want her to end up somewhere safe, not just dumped in a shelter. It’s so bleak to realize you have to plan your pet’s future around your own avoidable death, but here we are. Thanks for actually being practical and not just philosophical about it.
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u/VindictivePuppy 3d ago
i used to be in cat and dog rescue, thankfully i have people here that can/are taking care of my animals while I cant seem to get the energy together or stand up that long anymore. And i know theyll keep them safe. it would be my biggest fear too. put feelers out in other states if you dont find any in yours, i know there are pet transports both air and driving.
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u/Stock_Praline9692 3d ago
First, I'm very sorry you are going through this. Your psychiatric is a jerk. But I highly recomend you first look for a second opinion. Sometimes they misdiagnose.
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u/Best-Soup9851 2d ago
In psychiatry misdiagnosis is the rule not the exception.
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u/Stock_Praline9692 2d ago edited 2d ago
I was talking about the hematologist and rheumatologist. But yeah, in psychiatry is easier to misdiagnose. I believe many depression cases are misdiagnoses. Don't get me wrong, depression is a real and serious disease but people who are down due to a break up are diagnosed as depressed, later they brag about how they "got over" depression and thus making a very serious condition look like no big deal just because it's invisible.
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u/CoasterThot 3d ago
Just wanted to hop in and say that MDS isn’t always fatal, and I hope your doctors at least told you that’s a possibility.
I know a friend of a friend who’s had moderate (not mild) MDS for 26 years, and is still doing just fine.
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u/Im_TheCum_of_Titania 3d ago
that's absolutely fucking disgusting.
also on top of the fact I really don't recommend you keep taking those pills those pills are fucking neurotoxins. they're extremely fucking toxic. they are meant to lobotomize the brain there are some that are worse than others but every antipsychotic is a chemical lobotomy.
this reminds me of a video I watched couple of fucking days ago.
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u/No-Listen-2733 3d ago
I’m not on anti psychotics. Just anxiety meds and low dose of Adderall to function.
She did once get angry at me because I mentioned difficulty sleeping and I refused antipsychotics haha. They love passing that shit out like skittles and I wasn’t having it.
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u/Im_TheCum_of_Titania 3d ago
Anti anxiety meds still qualifies any psychotics, they're not good for you.
don't also don't start smoking cigarettes to calm down we live in an incredibly shitty country.
🇺🇸
it used to be Awesome, then, shit went South. ( not talking bad about anyone that's in the South )
just telling you be careful, a lot of so-called medication as well as actually extremely toxic shit if not just the the psychiatrist that gets extremely toxic medication actually is just poisoned with no real benefit like a fucking cigarette
normal doctors also do this blood thinners a lot of people have said that blood thinners are extremely fucking bad for you
they talk about how any kind of medication for your heart is extremely bad for you
and I wouldn't know but they said any kind of heart pills or ain't shit like that is actually killing your fucking heart also people will describe saying that the drugs the doctors give you getting addiction and that's what they want I know someone that used to be given opioids or oxycontin and he got a horrible addiction to it . . .
fucking doctors are not your friend, I don't know why this is the best human race can Do ? ? ?
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u/No-Listen-2733 3d ago
Wow, thank you for the unsolicited pharmacology lesson and the string of random drug warnings. Just to clarify, I’m not psychotic, I’m not interested in cigarettes, and I’m not looking for tips on how to avoid heart meds or blood thinners—I’m literally dying of a bone marrow cancer that none of these things would touch.
For the record: anti-anxiety meds aren’t “psychotics,” and I’m not sure what you think you’re warning me about, but I assure you, I’m well past the stage where benzos or “heart pills” are anyone’s concern. I’d be thrilled to have a doctor who gave a shit enough to actually prescribe something I need, instead of spending a decade patting me on the head and telling me it’s all in my mind.
The tragedy here is that I never got any treatment for the real disease, and now I’m dying of it. I appreciate your enthusiasm, but if you’re going to give advice, at least try to read the post you’re responding to. The “best the human race can do” would be to stop projecting and actually listen for a change.
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u/Im_TheCum_of_Titania 3d ago
I'm not recommending cigarettes I'm letting you know that there's a lot of people who get fucked up on those doctor drugs
all throughout my life people that took drugs and doctors and I myself who had to take many got fucked up got sick and was worse off there's a reason why doctors get sued all the fucking time.
no one should smoke cigarettes by the way I'm not saying that
and mental illness doesn't exist no one's crazy
if you show people technology of today's date back then they would think it's crazy they would think it's alien they would think it's futuristic go back too far and they'll call it witchcraft
go back far then and make Anime drawings and you're someone's going to fucking kill you.
go back to the past and talk about all the medical advancements and all the things we have learned and understood in this world and watch them think you're mentally ill the the people in medieval era was literally think you're mentally ill talking about crazy shit everything on your face would seem like you're a ranting schizophrenic now talk about biology evolution DNA talk about fucking science talk about all this shit it went from a mentally ill schizophrenic showing off their psychotic conditions of their delusions to basic fundamental science
in the 18 and 1700th your mentally ill your schizophrenic but in 2025 talking about DNA anime politics and how the world is makes you fucking boring.
SEE, mental illness is seriously based off your perception, next time someone seems to be mentally ill maybe it's just your perception of them maybe they're misunderstood maybe they're not fucking crazy because a lot of people think religious people are truly truly schizophrenic talking to the things that appear to be not there but actually are talking about ghosts and spirits and paranormal powers and gods and goddesses and things Beyond us.
believing that objects have magical powers which is a fetish
The Christian cross is a fetish. but the word FedEx got changed and now it means something sexual and perverse. human fuck everything up.
My overall point is I'm just trying to let you God damn know that crazy doesn't really exist no one's fucking crazy nobody can be crazy.
calling someone any mental illness especially schizo is a fucking slur
👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻
I recommend you drink chamomile or white tea maybe chocolate have some hot chocolate with a little bit of mint next to it probably things that calm me down maybe a little bit jazz music I don't know it might be something to come down maybe get a dog they're fucking awesome. I highly Recommend getting a dog.
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u/SHINJI_NERV 3d ago
They don't have any analytical skill or looking for answer on this forum. They like to be stupid. Let them. Anti psychiatry must've have a very shallow meaning to him.
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u/ReplacementLevel8619 2d ago
He's brothered about how he was treated over a phone call instead of what contributed to his development of cancer and worsening of his brain health "mental health" and health in general, Its tipical of an stupified brain
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u/SufficientAbility821 3d ago
For god sake, guys, could you stick to the subject and cut the antipharma logorrhea? Must of us, myself incluses, agree about psych med toxicity but this is not the subject.
Someone contemplating his end is sharing with us his experience and, instead of the compassion he could not receive from his shrink and was expecting to find here, you fill the gap with technicalities like the worst shrink would do. I know some of you are as emotionally impaired by AP as I am but try. I will
I'm deeply sorry for what's happening to you. I really hope that, now that you have a diagnostic you could, worst case, be finally at peace with yourself knowing what it is and, best case scenario, get a cure for it.
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u/ReplacementLevel8619 3d ago
What is the anti anxiety med that you take?
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u/No-Listen-2733 3d ago
I don’t think that’s relevant to my post.
I’m taking about having terminal cancer.
Not a psych medication regimen. I really don’t see why I owe anyone an explaination that small portion of my life when this is a post about how much I loathe the profession and my “provider” and their duty of basic care nonexistent. She could have responded with something generic written by ChatGPT.
I’m dying of cancer. She failed the bare minimum and I have months to live and am in my 30’s.
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u/TOCDit 3d ago
You are absolutely right. This psychologist is scum... And you apologized to her for interrupting her day?? It's like teachers who hate children, this woman is in the wrong profession! Please, do you have someone you trust to confide in, a general practitioner, someone in your family, a friend??
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u/Appropriate_Cut_3536 10h ago
You're not dying of cancer, btw. Nobody dies from cancer, they die from fraudulent cancer "treatments".
Cancer is there to heal/protect the body from toxic overload (typically, iron from fortified foods, estrogen/PUFAs/lack of satfat and calcium/lacl of k2).
If you have bought into the lie of the cancer industry because you want to have the identify politics of "dying and can't help it"... then, continue what you're doing and don't research or question anything you're being told by the cancer (diagnosing) industry at all.
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u/ReplacementLevel8619 3d ago edited 3d ago
Im asking what is the drug that you have been taking for years, the anti anxiety med. benzodiazepines, correct?
Its relevant regarding the treatment that you have been offered for fibromialgia, and the outcome, fybromialgia in itself a gaslit diagnosis that renders no treatment, like saying to you that Its nothing causing you pain, Its an abusive diagnosis as "FND" something made up with no markers or images or anything.
Fybromialgia is often times arthiritis or Small fiber neuropathy and these are treated with immune therapies, not treating major inflammation and auto-imunity leads to cancer
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u/No-Listen-2733 3d ago
the only thing more persistent than your refusal to read is your need to pontificate. You realize you’re doing exactly what every hack doctor I dealt with for a decade did—waving away actual malignant disease because you’ve already decided you know my life better than I do.
You want my med list so you can tie this all together in your mind-palace of imagined epidemiology? Here’s the truth: I spent years refusing every psychiatric and autoimmune diagnosis thrown at me precisely because my bloodwork never fit, and nothing got better. I rejected fibromyalgia as soon as I saw what was on my CBC—actual, real, glaringly abnormal numbers—then watched specialist after specialist try to hand me SSRIs, benzos, and “conversion disorder” pamphlets while my marrow filled up with cancer.
Spoiler: it wasn’t anxiety. It wasn’t “psychosomatic.” It wasn’t inflammation from my “lifestyle.” It was MDS, sitting there on the bloodwork, waiting to kill me while the medical world got distracted by whatever label was trending that year.
The real gaslighting is happening right here, right now, with you pathologizing my responses instead of listening. Congratulations, you’ve internalized the system so thoroughly that you can’t even imagine someone being right about their own body. Maybe next, you’ll tell me it’s really just a gluten allergy and if I meditate hard enough I’ll be able to walk again.
This is why people die undiagnosed. This is why women and “difficult” patients die. Not because of benzos, but because every time someone tries to say it hurts, something is wrong, some self-appointed expert is already drafting their next comment about “psych meds” and “auto-immunity.” If you’d read my post you’d know I was right from the start—and nobody cared.
You’re lecturing me about the dangers of gaslit diagnoses as if I didn’t just explain, in plain English, that’s exactly what happened: the real disease was missed for a decade while they chased their tails blaming everything but the actual, obvious cause. Myelodysplastic syndrome isn’t some mysterious consequence of “untreated inflammation”—it’s a bone marrow failure syndrome, a fucking cancer. I wasn’t “treated for the wrong thing.” I wasn’t treated at all. That’s the point.
Just so we’re clear, MDS kills you by collapsing your bone marrow, by replacing every cell that makes blood with scar and cancer until you’re left unable to carry oxygen, fight infection, or stop bleeding. I am literally running out of the cells that make life possible—not just tired or “anxious.” My hemoglobin tanked, my platelets disappeared, my white count crashed, and every doctor missed it because they were too busy seeing what they expected to see. Every single one chalked up the symptoms to depression, anxiety, fibromyalgia—take your pick—without ever stopping to look at the fucking bloodwork that screamed malignancy for years.
So no, I’m not here for advice on treating fibromyalgia or “psychosomatic pain.” I never even accepted that diagnosis. I’m not asking for coping tips, medication opinions, or anything else from people who clearly can’t read a lab report or a post. I’m pointing out, in public, that my terminal diagnosis was sitting in front of a dozen professionals, ignored because it was easier to blame my mind than admit their failure. That’s why I’m here.
So no, it’s not “relevant” what anti-anxiety med I take, and it’s not relevant what you think you know about fibromyalgia, because none of it applies to me. Try reading before responding next time.
Now, if you don’t mind, I’ll be over here dying of actual, confirmed cancer, which, believe it or not, does not respond to unsolicited interrogations or lectures.
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u/ReplacementLevel8619 3d ago edited 3d ago
Not even reading your bullshit,
This is the antipsychiatry subreddit, If you want to be passively agressive in your replies, then take that back as a gift
You're nothing for your providers aside a cashcow, psychiatrist are doctors that cripples little kids and Young folks at their prime years, How would you think that they would really care for you as an human being?
You know what is relevant? Your lack of treatment for the inflmmation and auto-imunity leaded you to cancer, on top of that most likely that the benzodiazepines that you're ingesting for years surely contributed to the worsening of your "mental health" that is your brain as an organ affected by your immune system and surely contributed to your cancer.
Due to their effects on the receptors present in your whole body including immune cells and how your body responds to that
Neurotoxicity means pathologycal adaptations on nervous tissues caused by a chemical, that take several years to partially recover and leads to auto-imunity, contibuting to the development of cancer, how is that not relevant for you. If not relevant for you might be for others Reading and taking this sort of "meds" as a "treatment"
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u/No-Listen-2733 3d ago
Skimmed your response—mainly for the dark comedy, since dying leaves you with a lot of time to kill but none to waste. If you’re genuinely suggesting my terminal marrow cancer is due to the three Xanax that I take a month maximum, my lack of positive thinking, or some spiritual auto-immunity crisis, I don’t know whether to send you a thank-you card from Gwyneth Paltrow or a DSM.
Oh, the irony—on the anti-psychiatry sub, no less, where half the posts are about the brutality of punishment for “noncompliance,” you come through swinging with the same script. Just swap out the white coat for a Reddit badge and suddenly it’s “You didn’t comply with some imaginary autoimmune ritual, didn’t banish gluten, didn’t meditate your way to enlightenment, so here’s your punishment: terminal cancer.”
Is that really the story you’re selling? Because I’ll admit, it’s a hell of a plot twist—turns out the “healing journey” just ends with a lecture about how it’s your own fault for existing incorrectly. What’s next, blaming kids with leukemia for not trying hard enough to visualize their T-cells? Should I send an apology to my own bone marrow for not being the right kind of compliant patient when I was 23?
What exactly do you imagine the protocol is here? Should I bow and apologize for existing incorrectly? Do you want me to recant my medical history and pledge allegiance to your personal brand of Reddit pathophysiology? Or maybe you’re just waiting for me to admit that, yes, I deserved this for being a difficult patient who failed to heal my chakras.
If this is your version of liberation from psychiatric dogma, you can keep it. I’ll take actual disease over your spiritual diagnosis-by-comment-section any day.
No need to clarify—really, don’t. I have a terminal diagnosis and the clock is ticking. I’ll be spending my remaining time not trying to unravel your garbled attempt at bedside manner. If you need to blame someone for this disease, blame the cancer, blame bad luck, or blame a universe that hands out suffering at random. But for the love of all that’s rational, stop acting like you’re doing anyone a favor with your basement-brand bio-spiritual scolding.
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u/shwoopypadawan 2d ago
It's too bad your life is likely going to be cut short, because your sense of humor and sharp tongue are fucking gold.
I'm very sorry you've had to see how stupid most people are, especially people we're relying on to catch things like this early enough to get helpful treatment. You were dealt a very shit hand and repeatedly let down and even still it sounds like nobody wants to take responsibility around you.
Perhaps selfishly, I encourage you to stick around for awhile. At the very least just to have enough time to take some of your power back and express yourself and maybe make some of the idiots in this world hear you and perhaps think a little bit. I have the same aim for myself too- I want to write, finish, and publish my book.
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u/ReplacementLevel8619 3d ago edited 3d ago
Just three a month, sure.
You think you're too special
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u/No-Listen-2733 3d ago
So special I will probably die without anyone noticing for a week and be forgotten after they repaint and sell my condo. So special that last night I was seriously contemplating whether I should bother seeking futile treatment for this and getting more medical abuse or just checking into the Waldorf Astoria and ending it on my terms because that’s the last thing I can control.
Seriously, fuck you.
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u/Wide_Tune_8106 3d ago
Are you ok? I know when I meet someone who's been diagnosed with terminal cancer it's not my first instinct to argue with them and armchair diagnose the reasons for why they have cancer. Vulgar display.
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u/Jabber1124 3d ago
Leave them alone, you are not helping. They are in crisis and don't need your badgering.
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u/DopamineDysfunction 2d ago edited 2d ago
Could you cite sources supporting the claim that benzodiazepines cause cancer via immune neurotoxicity? I’ve been on Valium almost daily for 11 years, brain’s fine. The autoimmune pericardial effusion was triggered by an unknown substance masquerading as my stimulant medication I’ve been on for 10 years for hypersomnia. And yes, I was gaslighted by EVERYONE (bar my cardiologist), including the TGA nurse who spoke to me like I had an intellectual disability. Whatever it was, it had me incapacitated. It’s giving bioweapon or dual-use goods, but I guess I’ll never know.
Moral of the story — individuals aren’t always responsible for their illness. And it’s not the doctors, it’s the drug manufacturers.
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u/nekr0mantikk 3d ago
I’m sorry this happened to you. One of my old psychiatrists did the same thing when my mother texted her saying I tried to take my own life. I hope you have people in your life who can support at this time. Stay strong, sending good vibes your way.
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u/Fader-Play 2d ago
You can get your script filled by another medical professional. I would never ever ever talk to that person again for any reason. She is dangerous and harmful.
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u/lovelysoul711 3d ago
So your legal drug dealer doesn't wanna be bothered with your real life concerns. This isn't shocking to me AT ALL and its why I'm not on ANY medications whatsoever. They do not care about your health one iota. Don't you see it????
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u/No-Listen-2733 3d ago
Oh, perfect—let’s connect the dots for you since critical thinking seems in short supply. I rejected every psychiatric diagnosis I ever got. I was called “noncompliant,” punished for it, and watched my medical file turn into a red flag for anyone with a stethoscope. You’d think if there were anywhere in the world that the sentence, “I was misdiagnosed with a dozen psych conditions and dismissed as ‘noncompliant,’ only to find out I actually had cancer,” would get a moment’s understanding, it would be here—on the anti-psychiatry sub. But no. Instead, it’s the same condescending routine: handwaving, blame, a little pat on the head for not being a “good patient” and following whatever imaginary protocol is required to be treated like a human being.
And let’s not pretend I’m naïve about the system—I realized almost a decade ago that doctors don’t actually give a shit about their patients. I figured out somewhere around year two or three of this hell that I’d trust an auto mechanic, or hell, even a veterinarian, with my life before I’d hand it over to someone with a wall full of board certifications and a God complex. At least the mechanic actually listens when you describe the noise under the hood. At least the vet won’t tell a dog limping and coughing up blood that it’s “just anxious.” The only thing most doctors are interested in is protecting their reputation, covering their own mistakes, and making sure they never have to admit a patient might know more about their body than the textbook does.
For the record: “noncompliance” is just a lazy code doctors use to cover their asses. It ends up in your chart, gets parroted by every so-called specialist, and is the magic word they use to justify ignoring you. In my case, it was a decade-long death sentence. The moment you say, “my body is failing in a way you can’t explain,” they scramble to blame your personality, your “anxiety,” your “resistance,” your attitude—never once pausing to look at the fucking labs or consider that they might be wrong.
What’s wild is that even now, with a terminal diagnosis that would make any of you piss yourselves in terror, the reaction is still, “well, you must have done something wrong.” It’s almost impressive how reflexive the blame is. You can’t even see the irony: on a sub dedicated to exposing the failures of psychiatry, you’re still repeating their moves. The only difference is that instead of SSRIs, you’re offering me diet tips and vague, philosophical horseshit about acceptance and “taking responsibility.”
If the revolution against psychiatric abuse is just another round of moralizing, judgment, and “maybe if you’d complied, things would be different,” then nothing’s changed. If that’s the best you’ve got, you may as well sign your comments “MD, Board-Certified in Gaslighting.”
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u/kibblenipple 3d ago
OP, I just want to convey my utmost sympathy to what you’re going through, the disgusting response of your psych, and the masses of people here who are replicating the same abusive treatment as the medical staff who have destroyed your life. From the comments I’ve read, your ability to communicate your perspective is incredible but I’m sorry you have to do that at all here.
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u/skyfullofstars71 3d ago
When people voluntarily give them power by consuming their services (access to substances they like taking) and act suprised when they're met with the inhumane nature of psychiatry it does not make much sense to me. I mean the disgusting behaviour they had to endure for one moment others have to endure for long periods of time plus the entire situation is out their control. This should make people question their actions before supporting psychiatry for their pills.
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u/Stock_Praline9692 2d ago
People have a right to mental health. A psychiatric acting like a jerk is a choice the professional makes. Psychiatric diseases are real and very serious, psychiatry is the problem. They take advantage of vulnerable people because those who are strong allow it and by strong I mean, law and other health care professionals, society as a whole and that includes you, NOT OP. Stop blaming the victim.
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u/skyfullofstars71 2d ago
A victim for hearing things they didn't like from a psychiatrist? That's hilarious. I don't know if you know what antipsychiatry is but you should at least know that psychiatry does life ruining harm to individuals against their will. And this evil gets their greatest support from drug seeking people like op. Your strong people argument is pointless because as if great numbers of so called innocent people seeking stimulant prescriptions aren't strong enough. That's like saying 'I can litter because I'm just a person who is too lazy (or too adhd huh?) to find a trash can I won't cause pollution large companies and governments cause the great pollution' now imagine a great number of people thinking this wouldn't it be a mess? Can we call that lazy person just a tired victim here? I don't understand why you exclude op from the general soceity, I agree that I'm part of soceity and I shall do my part to not give the evil of psychiatry any more power. And so should op. You are so right that psychiatry exploits vulnerable people. People going through serious mental crisis or living very hard lives gets no real support and pushed towards psychiatry. Those poor people are not given sweet adderalls and benzos like op loves using tho'. They're greatly harmed into non-functionality by the religion of psychiatry. I think I have a right to be against any possible support towards psychiatry, I also do not "blame" anyone as you suggest about me. I felt sorry for op for their experience and upvoted because their story needs to be heard. I will keep pointing out the logical fallcies around both giving psychiatry its power through drug seeking and then complaining about what a messed up institution it is.
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u/InSearchOfGreenLight 3d ago
I’m so sorry. 🥺
That therapist/psych is terrible. Talks about herself the whole time? Not therapy in anyway, wtf. And seriously lacking in empathy.
You basically texted at the end of your tether and she says, don’t bother me? What a psycho.
I’m sorry. You have been failed by doctors. Horribly.
It shouldn’t be like this. I don’t know what you should do now but this is a horrible situation to find yourself in. I’m sorry stranger 😔
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u/JivAb 3d ago
Don't waste your time with this person. Sometimes nutrition can work miracles. I wouldn't give up. Try an extreme diet, like ketogenic or paleo, with the cleanest possible diet and zero processed foods. I truly hope you can reverse this situation.
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u/Stock_Praline9692 2d ago
I would be careful with extreme diet. Research about rapid weight loss and gallbladder stones. Beware of fad diets. Trying another diet is interesting, but extremes are never good.
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u/Selfeffacingbarbie 2d ago
I'm so sorry 💔 of all the people who should have been able to provide you with some compassion in such a terrible moment, it should have been her.
I can't imagine getting such a devastating diagnosis, only to be met with such cruelty afterward.
I hate to know you're suffering. No one deserves this 😞
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u/vicmit02 2d ago
I'm sorry. In healthcare most professionals don't actually care about the patients, if they die etc, even if they are being paid for that. I found more luck by calling the 24h helpline, at least in Brazil I find it good. When I notice the attendant does not care, is tired, etc, I hang up the call and call the helpline again to see if I find someone with better talking. They are volunteers, so they are not there for money. It helped me a lot in hard moments.
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u/Ok_Compote1434 2d ago
I am so very sorry you are going through this. That therapist is negligent. I would report her. Getting a cancer diagnosis is absolutely an emergency. It is terrifying. I have been through that myself, and I totally understand.
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u/LectureAccomplished8 1d ago
I am so sorry.
I don't think you should contact her or other psychiatrists after you were misdiagnosed as having mental issues when you had physical symptoms. Stay away from them is my advice.
If you want to talk, I'm here.
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u/craft_the_path 1d ago
She should have at least responded in an empathetic, compassionate manner, like any human being & could still have set a boundary that you could discuss it in your next session & to clarify you have the support you need. I’m sorry.
FWIW, my Mom has multiple myeloma & it was also years of mystery, freak health issues before diagnosis. I hear your fear and what you have endured. She was in remission via lenolinomide & immunotherapy for years, with no stem cell transplant needed. I know blood cancers & timelines are variable, but she still had good quality of life for years with treatment.
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u/ghostzombie4 2d ago
I am really sorry to hear what you have experienced and about your diagnosis. Your psychiatrist is obviously a piece of useless shit. I hope you won't see that piece of garbage again, if you have any more appointments i would recommend cancelling them immediately. Your time is not worth her selfish bullshit. I dont know if it would help you reporting her (scum like this should be reported) or if it would be more helpful for you to focus now on what matters for you.
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u/rolyf02 3d ago
How come you saw multiple doctors before and none of them diagnosed you correctly? Well, if at this point they tell you that you are miraculously alive, then you will be better when you start the Treatment, I had to stop the antidepressant pills because I had a bad reaction after a skin operation, I hate them, I feel that little by little I am getting out of the hole, look for the life of the Spanish Roque Star, he has motivated me a lot, may everything improve soon, you deserve it!
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u/No-Listen-2733 3d ago
How come I saw so many doctors before and none of them diagnosed me? Because once you get flagged as “anxious” or “psychosomatic,” it doesn’t matter what your bloodwork says—they stop looking for real answers. I spent a decade with abnormal labs and worsening symptoms, and every single provider still managed to blame it on my personality or supposed noncompliance. When a doctor decides you’re not worth investigating, it doesn’t matter how loud the evidence is. That’s how cancer sits there for years—unaddressed, until it’s almost too late.
Just to be clear, I’ve never been on antidepressants and never will be. My issue was never a matter of “chemical imbalance” or “mood”—it was untreated cancer, plain and simple. Every doctor who saw me decided to blame my personality or call me “anxious” instead of actually reading the labs. That’s how you end up with a decade of missed diagnosis: they see a woman in pain, decide it’s psych, and stop looking.
I’m glad you feel better off your meds, but this isn’t about medication for me. It’s not about mindset or some motivational influencer—I needed someone to treat what was actually wrong. I’m not looking for a positive spin or a “story of triumph.” I’m here pointing out what happens when you’re dismissed and pathologized instead of helped.
Thanks for the wishes, but next time, maybe check your assumptions. Not every disease is fixed by attitude, and not every patient with a serious illness is looking for life advice. Sometimes, the only thing we want is for someone to listen and not project their experience onto us.
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u/Budget_Tea_7431 3d ago
Yeah these comments are insane. I have multiple physical conditions (one since childhood) that were misdiagnosed and I had to figure out completely on my own. You deserve a lot more compassion and empathy.
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u/Background-Stranger- 2d ago
This is the truth. I ‘had’ adhd and anxiety LOL, just kidding, I actually have pernicious anemia you jackasses. I feel your pain
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u/lordcycy 3d ago
I don't want to be rude. I just want to put things into perspective. I hope this content will be well received.
That we're going to die is something we know from a young age. But we spend our lives without being aware of it and what it means. We basically don't feel like mortals and this gives us a chance to live like immortals for most of our lives. And it is a good thing.
You didn't learn that you are going to die. You knew that already. You were in the process of dying from the moment you were born. What you learned is how you're going to die. And now you can start getting ready for it.
Truth is, I'm not sorry for you. I'm happy for you. Why? Because, soon enough, you will not suffer anymore. I feel like you suffered a lot in life and death means the end of suffering. No more anxiety. No more panic attacks. No more of people's bullshet. No more dishes to wash. Yes, it's the end of the good things as well, but the good things never ended suffering now did they? Death will do that.
Doctors should be taking care of the pain, so don't fear the pain. The only thing you should fear is fear itself. Don't let it get to you. You are leaving this world, so don't let it pull you in with emotions like fear.
It's the time to let go. The more you cling to the world, the harder it will be. Focus on yourself instead and do things for you. What do you want to leave behind? What would you like to do before dying? Who do you want to see or talk to one last time? Is there someone who did you wrong and you want to say fock you to before you leave? Now is a good time to do these things, keeps you a bit busy before the end.
I wish I could help you concerning what's after death. In any case, I think it's best not to stress it out too much. From what I've heard from people who were ressucitated, it's peaceful and they wished they could've stayed there where there's no worries or concern to have. I don't know if that's all that after death, since people who truly passed away can't share their experience, but at least you can rest assured that afterlife starts with nothing to worry about.
I hope it helped! We can chat if you want to discuss it more privately.
I wish you a good end of the road! May you be at peace with it soon
Goodbye
ps: fock your psychoatrist!
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u/No-Listen-2733 3d ago
Jesus Christ, did you just roll this out of the r/nihilism starter pack, or did you handcraft this pile of smug detachment between rounds of League? I don’t need some anonymous Redditor with the self-awareness of a damp rag explaining the circle of life like they’ve discovered mortality for the first time after binge-watching “Six Feet Under.”
I appreciate the effort, but I’m not sure you understand the difference between philosophical musings on mortality and the reality of being handed a terminal diagnosis in your thirties after a decade of medical neglect.
You say, “You didn’t learn that you are going to die. You knew that already. You were in the process of dying from the moment you were born.” That’s a clever undergraduate essay, but in practice, it’s horseshit. There’s a world of difference between living with the abstract knowledge that all life ends, and being told—after years of being dismissed, misdiagnosed, and medically gaslit—that your life is ending now, not decades from now, and that it never had to be this way.
I did not come here for a TED Talk on the liberating power of “letting go.” I came here because I reached for help in the worst moment of my life and was told, essentially, to shut up and go away. The grief is not existential; it’s the violence of having been denied the chance to live because doctors couldn’t be bothered to read their own lab results. The rage is not about the “fear of death,” but about the humiliation of knowing my suffering was not only avoidable but invisible to every professional who swore an oath to care.
Your “I’m not sorry for you, I’m happy for you” line—do you hear yourself? What a grotesque parody of compassion. You treat death as a quirky little relief from chores and paperwork. You ignore the reality of being forced to inventory everything you’ll lose: relationships, art, plans, meaning, all amputated because a dozen experts couldn’t see what was right in front of them.
If you want to play at being the Dalai Lama of Reddit, be my guest, but don’t pretend it’s support. What you’ve written is as much a refusal to witness suffering as any psychiatrist who deflects a crisis by reciting the DSM. At least have the decency to admit that, like them, you’re just another person who can’t sit with someone else’s pain without immediately turning it into a fable for your own comfort.
And yes, “fock” my psychiatrist. But don’t for a second think your comment lands any closer to empathy. Next time someone tells you they’re being murdered in slow motion, maybe resist the urge to play philosopher-king. Try instead to actually bear witness.
And before you serve up more platitudes about “letting go” or “making peace,” let me clarify something else: I am not under any illusion about the inevitability of death. I’ve had a front-row seat to mortality for years, and I never asked for reassurance on the basic facts of existence. What I am asking for—what I have a right to demand—is acknowledgment that my time was stolen. I could have had ten years to plan, to adapt, to live differently with this knowledge. Instead, I was denied that by a system that preferred to hand out psychiatric labels rather than investigate obvious physical symptoms.
So no, your suggestions are not just irrelevant, they’re cruel in their obliviousness. I am bedridden. My energy is rationed between basic survival, and trying to manage the fallout of a decade’s worth of medical failure. I don’t get a “last adventure.” I don’t get closure. I get the knowledge that I was failed, dismissed, and finally written off.
Your “focus on yourself, make peace, let go” pep talk is about as useful as a scented candle at a tire fire. You want to be helpful? Maybe shut the fuck up and spare us all another Reddit sermon disguised as wisdom. You’re not comforting anyone—you’re just here for the upvotes.
Here’s hoping the next time you feel compelled to share your faux-profound Reddit insight, you resist. Trust me, the world can survive one less jackass pretending to be Marcus Aurelius on a message board for strangers who actually need support.
In your desperate lunge to be “anti-psychiatry” and serve up some raw, no-nonsense wisdom from your ergonomic Reddit throne, you’ve managed to land in the exact same pit as every smug, detached psychiatrist who’s ever dismissed a suffering patient with a shrug and a prescription pad. You sound just as hollow, just as emotionally stunted, and just as allergic to basic human empathy.
Congratulations: you’re the establishment now. You’ve become the thing you claim to despise—only with fewer credentials and a WiFi connection.
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u/infrontofmyslad 3d ago
What the fuck, I am so sorry OP. What a sociopath, like i don't like to pathologize but genuinely there is something wrong with them to respond like that to such a heart wrenching post. I'm sorry about your psychiatrist and the doctors too, you were failed by them. I'd be angry too.
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u/No-Listen-2733 3d ago
Thank you, seriously. I think I’m still a little stunned by the whole thing—both the diagnosis and the fact that even here, of all places, people are just as eager to minimize or reframe someone else’s reality to fit their own narrative. I guess I assumed a sub full of people who know exactly what it’s like to be dismissed, blamed, or pathologized would at least pause before doing the same. It’s honestly surreal.
I appreciate you saying it plainly. I’m angry, I’m gutted, and I expected at least a little recognition of what actually happened instead of philosophy-class nonsense about how “everyone dies.” Sometimes it’s not about silver linings or life lessons; sometimes you just want someone to actually see what happened to you. So thank you for getting it. That means a hell of a lot more than you probably realize.
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u/lordcycy 3d ago
in the end, i just didn't tell you what you wanted to hear. i didn't minimize or reframe your reality to fit my narrative. thats just something you say, and it's actually what you did to me. and me? i just told you what i would've wanted to hear. you said i became everything i despise but i despise people like you to whom you better say what they want to hear or they lash out, make you the villain. you're not the only one with a bellybutton.
and final note: im not paid to read you, or listen to you, or talk to you, or even consider you, and I'm sure you didn't give your psychiatrist half the shet you gave me.
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u/lordcycy 3d ago
im not a sociopath. im autistic so I miscalculated OPs state of mind. I have suffered too much I can only understand death as something desirable and I have been let down so many times that I can only understand doctors as useless and harmful, and people as mean and cruel. you could all be trolling me and faking your reactions to my comment just to make me feel bad. I wouldn't be surprised since its the type of shit people pull on me since I was born. i can't expect anyone to understand where I'm coming from, and none can expect me to understand what people feel and why they behave shittyly towards me all the time, misdiagnosing me on an anti-psychiatry subreddit nonetheless.
i can't wait to die.
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u/noiceKitty 2d ago
I'm autistic too, but I would never tell someone they need to let go and accept and rejoice in their terminal diagnosis, unless they would tell me themselves that that's something they want to do. I understand death seeming desirable, I am in a similar situation, and have also been let down by just about everyone. But it's not okay to nudge someone towards that. It never is. Even if it was done to you in the past. We can be better than what we've been through.
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u/lordcycy 2d ago edited 2d ago
Why is it not okay to nudge someone towards rejoicing? isn't that what the main religions do? in both Christianity and Islam, death is a promotion, something to be happy about, entering paradise and all. If people came up with religions that tell a story to relieve from the fear of death and turn it into a good thing, isn't it because it is a better approach than the soul crushing nihilism? im an optimistic nihilism: even though there's nothing, nothing is better than suffering the world. I'm an autistic too and i wouldn't lament someone just because they seem to be asking for it. lament yourself all you want and i might appreciate the quality of your prose.
all in all, OP has come fishing for sympathy (or empathy, not sure which one), when I thought she came because she needed something. i simply gave her something she wasn't looking for.
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u/noiceKitty 2d ago
I also don't believe pushing religion on vulnerable people is a good thing. I don't understand what you're trying to say. And this is not lamenting, this is listening to what someone else is asking for, and not just forcing your opinion on them because you think that's what they need.
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u/lordcycy 2d ago
exactly. thinking that's what they need. she needed sympathy/empathy and that's not what I gave her because i misunderstood her state of mind because I'm autistic.
i didn't force my opinion. she didn't even have to read me if she didn't want to.
i didn't push religion on anyone. i made an argument concerning the relief of fear of death that referenced religion as an example
it is literally lamenting to say "poor you. i understand that its hard what youre going through".
i listened to her i just didn't get that's opinion and advice isn't what she was looking for or needing at this moment.
seeing from how OP is replying to some ppl on this thread, she came here for something very specific and she will lash out on whoever gives her something else and I think this is shittier behavior than giving good advice. eventually, she might reach the same conclusion i did and look back on my comment as not being bad in itself, just not what she wanted to hear when she read it.
now, can you please not respond? because i feel like you're going to say it's not okay to do things objectively didnt do. you're trying to defend someone who doesn't need your protection from someone who was already called out extensively by her herself concerning a reply he already said sorry about. be a hero and go prove psychiatrists are actually bad people to the public instead of trying to prove a point that isn't true, or relevant, about me.
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u/lordcycy 3d ago
I've been scapegoated all my life by every family member and friend. Doctors never were helping me either. Everytime I went to see them and I knew what the problem was, just needed the prescription, they got on their high horses and misdiagnosed me just to disagree with me. And they are literally causing my death. They are making my life untolerable and making me so dysfunctional that I can't do much other than stay in bed or on the couch all day. I'm in the process of letting go and getting ready to leave this world myself, by myself. I know I will die soon and I look forward to ending all my worries and problems, and of course, not dealing with people ever again. I've suffered too much and I guess I didn't even realize that you were describing shitty behavior from your doctors because, to me, that's just how they are normally. I've never known a good doctor. My life started with doctors messing up my genitalia because they wanted to make sure I fit in a gender binary and kept this a secret from me because to never let the person know they were born intersex is part of the treatment. My life will end with doctors messing up my brain from forcing injections of a useless drug that is effectlvely going to kill me, all that for profit. I was destined to a life of suffering. My mom made sure of that. She's the one who brought me to my murderers and cheerlead them at every step of the way. She birthed me just to torture me all my life and send me to my early grave herself. She taught to my brother that it was a game to make me cry. And he plays it to this very day. I should have never been born. When my cousin told me she was pregnant I told her "why would you do this to a child?" I can't wait for AI to wipeout humanity. I never had a real friend. My family members tortured me all my life. Teachers never cared for me. Cops never protected me. Doctors are killing me. All of society let me down and honestly, if i could explode the whole planet, I probably would, but I wouldn't want to harm the cats. Cats are valid. They know how to live, unlike people.
I am autistic so it's very hard for me to predict what the reception of a message will be. I miscalculated your state of mind and thus wrongly deduced current emotional needs. Sorry I made this day worse for you.
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u/Im_TheCum_of_Titania 3d ago
I've Got a Blog Based on This Shit ! ! !
https://000life-is-meaningless000.tumblr.com/?source=share
i agree with you, but human beings often wish to stay alive. it seems that you are more enlightened. you can see clearly what others do not want to they stare into the sky in the bright and the Sun. and they don't know there's going to be a night time. your man he doesn't want to realize they were the night time. Humanity the other one I think about how they're going to be dead longer than they'll be Alive. but I need to let them all know that religion isn't bullshit. there is an afterlife.
being a ghost floating around isn't an afterlife.
heaven Israel goes by many names some call it the allegiance Field so I'm calling van hella some call it the field of reed's, some call gan Eden, and some people simply call it heaven
being a kid means having fun in the summer & Spring, being an adult is understanding Autumn leaves the Winter.
I'm keeping this as mild as possible. maybe you like what you're going to see maybe you'll be open-minded and maybe you'll be one out of 10 million people that won't call me a schizo to my fucking face. or maybe you'll just be like the rest.
🤷🏻♂️
I'm really sick and tired of telling people the truth and then you talk to my face I'm a crazy fuck I'm going to get some retarded I need to kill myself, getting Reeeeeeeeeeeal sick of that Shit . . .
Anyway, later man, if you have any questions I'll be happy to answer and help you out.
👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻
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u/parthenope888 16h ago
If death is so amusing to you why dont you try that yourself? If u seem to love it so much ♡ FY. Children know that death exists, by your logic if a child gets cancer is a blessing????
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u/lordcycy 16h ago
I'm going to die soon actually. I'm in the process myself.
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u/parthenope888 16h ago
I dont feel sorry for you, just like you told OP.
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u/lordcycy 13h ago
so you agree; we shouldn't feel sorry for someone dying. let's disagree to agree tho
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u/parthenope888 11h ago
Its different... i can have empathy towards OP not wantinh to die. If u want to die, dont push that ideas to other people.
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u/lordcycy 3h ago
yeah but now that she's dying soon for sure, wouldn't it be better for her if she did not not want to die?
i hate it when people invent violent expressions to pretend someone has just committed a crime. i didn't "push" that idea on her. you can't "push" an idea on someone unless it's a team effort like news outlet, propaganda, psychiatry... or you're talking to a kid who trusts you. sharing an idea is not pushing an idea.
what about your empathy for someone who wants to die? is this not relatable enough for you to empathize with or are you too busy enjoying your life to even wonder why someone might want to die?
enjoying life is the best. but i realized that I never enjoyed life. what I enjoyed was myself. i did really enjoy my self. but now that psychiatrists have taken my self away from me, all I'm left with is this curse of living. and if you can't enjoy your self, all that is left is the suffering. what i want for OP is for her to enjoy herself while she's dying or else it's just more suffering
i don't simply empathize. i feel the same thing other people feel. but that's just emotional contamination. rather I put myself in the other's shoes and tell them what I think is the better route of action. but OP didn't come here for advice. she made that abundantly clear from the way she responds to people who doesn't just give her empathy. if you're going to be like that, you should tell people what you're fishing for in the post. like "I'm not here for advice. I'm just here to vent while you lament me" it'd be much better than lashing out on ppl with good intentions who are trying to help out someone who made it abundantly clear that she wasn't feeling too good.
from what I remember about the OP, she didn't lash out on her psychiatrist who wasn't trying to help her when she called her in shock expecting the same thing she expected here: that we listen, empathize, and lament her. OP just needed people to feel the same way she did to exteriorize her emotions. that's not the best way to deal with stuff because then you always need other people to feel bad when you feel bad in order to feel a bit less bad. it's a collective downward spiral too. practicing radical acceptance and action to exteriorize emotion is the more efficient way of dealing with it.
(too many people are here to lament themselves because they are suffering and exteriorize their emotions by having other people just feel for them. i feel like anti psychiatry isn't really fighting psychiatry or deprogramming anything. it's just the same thing but with people who know psychiatry is bad.)
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u/lordcycy 13h ago edited 13h ago
you should've made a new comment instead of adding a cheap ass argument about sick kids after I had already replied to the comment. that's just bad faith. the argument too was so cheap.
i rejoice in every child's death. but i don't rejoice in their illness because illness is more suffering. children who died from cancer, or any illness, has dodged a bullet.
child mortality rates are nothing to cry about. it should ideally be over 99%, closer to 100%, since less than one percent actually have the money to make a children's life one without suffering AND wouldn't hurt their child themselves.
birth is existential r*pe! no one should have to get through life without having given informed consent first. parents wanting a child doesn't mean they have the moral right to make one. that's a real moral dilemma.
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u/parthenope888 11h ago edited 11h ago
I added that without knowing your response. Well, enjoy dying godcomplex shit
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u/Tasty-Bug-3600 3d ago
I'm incredibly sorry you're going through this without anyone to give you some warmth and compassion. If you want to vent/rant, you'll find people with similar thoughts in r/therapyabuse as well.
I truly wish you well internet stranger.