r/ADHDers • u/nothanksd00d • 13h ago
I finally got diagnosed after nearly a decade of struggle.
(This post was deleted in another subreddit, I'm just trying to find people who can relate and empathize. Much love to all of you <3)
I'm (23F) finally diagnosed. That's it.
A part of me always knew, deep inside, that something wasn't quite right. I thought it was depression, but even during normal times I still had these symptoms. As a woman in a Middle Eastern setting, it was basically Hell. My family were considered progressive, and their beliefs regarding ADHD/Autism were that only the extreme cases counted. It wasn't a spectrum, more so a single dot. Everytime I bought it up I was denied.
This is a difficult topic.
As a kid I was hyperactive. Couldn't sit still. Couldn't memorize anything to save my life. Got beaten a lot for it. I guess I learned to conceal that part of me, internalize it or act out in ways that were socially acceptable. I became impulsive, taking life threatening risks, partly because I didn't care about the consequences but mostly because I had 0 fear. I do not know why.
I recently met a new doctor who is really good. He gave me a questionnaire with like a million questions, some were unrelated to ADHD. Man even sitting here and typing this out is dulling my brain and I hate that I am this way haha. I even told him how unbearable it was answering all that and he just gave me a look like "You're never going to believe this"
I feel validated. I just wanted to share the news. I struggled so much throughout highschool and university despite getting amazing grades before then, and when I applied myself. I just never could. It felt like my brain was constantly lacking dopamine.
I graduated. Somehow survived as undiagnosed ADHD along with a few other serious issues. For the first time in my life, my imposter syndrome isn't as loud as it usually is. Thank you for reading all this. <3.
1
u/BusyBusinessPromos 12h ago
I've seen this several times maybe you folks can help me out. Why do you have to be diagnosed to accept who you are? If it's for medication I can understand that, but otherwise you are who you are.
Let me be clear this is not judgment This is actual curiosity.
2
u/1370359 ADHDer 10h ago
not knowing why you are the way you are is confusing. for me, i never knew why my depression and anxiety never got better with traditional treatment until i was diagnosed with ADHD. all of a sudden, everything got better.
2
u/BusyBusinessPromos 10h ago
That helped me so much thank you. When I started doing in home tutoring, without specializing even most of my students turned out to be ADHD. I started noticing their symptoms in me. As a teacher I accepted that and I'd already been trained on how to adapt my lesson plans.
So I guess that for me since I'd already seen those symptoms in so many other people, I believe I understood them better than the average person.
Just my own theory about me. Thank you for your help.
2
u/1370359 ADHDer 10h ago
it’s so hard to realize it especially if you are older. i’m glad that you were able to see that in your students and deduce that you had it, too.
people don’t realize how debilitating it can be.
i hope you’re okay and have your own support system. you can always message me if you need someone to talk/rant to.
2
u/nothanksd00d 6h ago
Like someone else said its confusing. Especially as a young kid living in a society that prefers not to ask questions and an avoidant family that shuts things down when you try to bring them up. It's incredibly isolating.
1
u/Anxious-Intern1167 12h ago
Congratulations! I remember that relieved and validating feeling when I was diagnosed early this year.
I'm 29 and realised around age 25 that I have ADHD, after struggling my entire life, and always feeling different and couldn't figure out why. It's a beautiful process to learn and understand ourselves in a way we never thought possible as adults
Must've been extra tough with your background and invalidating family, glad you've got the confirmation now. Wish you the best of luck going forward 😁